Jihyo checked herself out on the rearview mirror for the hundredth time. She knows she needs to get out of the car now but she felt so nervous and excited at the same time. She has no idea how she’d greet him. Will he look at her the same way? Will he still be the same person she knew? Or will he be the cold heartless man who didn’t bother to get in touch with her and their friends? After she’s gathered enough courage, Jihyo stepped out of her car and headed to the small café where they had agreed to meet.

There at the table farthest from the door, a cleanly shaved head protruded half-hidden by the backrest of the plush red couch. There is no mistaking that head. No other man in the world will have head as round as Kang Gary. Suddenly, Jihyo’s eyes blurred with tears. She hated the man for leaving the cast of Running Man and if that wasn’t enough he decided to go into hiding. Next thing she knew, he was married with a kid. They were supposed to be together forever—7012. A lot of things have happened but he kept his distance over the years. He was a cold-hearted man. She wanted to smack his head and curse him the way she did years ago, but he turned his head, stood up and smiled. It was a smile that she hasn’t seen in years.

“Jihyo-yah,” he called warmly.

“Oppa,” Jihyo croaked before giving him the biggest hug she ever gave him. She let the tears fall freely now. It used to be really awkward hugging him but at the moment she didn’t care at all.

“How have you been?” he said to her.

“I missed you, Oppa. You were so mean when you distanced yourself like that,” Jihyo said giving him a half-hearted slap on the arm. They sat down next to each other, with a space for awkwardness in between them. But they stared into each other’s smiling eyes.

“It’s really good to see you, Oppa,” Jihyo smiled.

“Same here,” Gary admitted.

“I honestly didn’t think you would come, but you’re here early,” said Jihyo.

“I was a little nervous but I was really looking forward to meeting you. I was afraid that you’d come in with a camera crew, but I know I could trust you,” Gary laughed but sneaked a quick peek behind Jihyo.

“I wouldn’t do that, oppa.”

“I know. The others would, but not you. I know that much,” Gary smiled.

“Then why did you have to cut us off completely? I understood it when you got married and had a kid but it’s been years now. We really missed you, you know? So much,” Jihyo said sincerely.

“Are you here to ask me to come back?” Gary said in alarm.

“No. Why? Would you come back if I asked you, too?” Jihyo said hopefully.

“Back to Monday Couple?” Gary whispered in jest, referring to their old couple name in Running Man.

Jihyo laughed, wiping the tears in her eyes. “No, that’s not why I’m here. But I do miss Monday Couple, yes. I would watch our shows, back when you were still there. You always had the loudest and most contagious laugh. But on the later episodes… I did see the sadness in your eyes. I blamed myself for not seeing it. You and oppas, and Kwangsoo, always took care of me. But I couldn’t take care of you. We were supposed to be a couple, but I—I cared so much of what other people think. I forgot about what you might think or how you might feel… I’m sorry, Oppa. I’m too late, but I’m sorry,” the tears in Jihyo’s eyes started flowing again.

“Hey, it wasn’t all that bad. I loved you guys, even the staff. I never regretted any of it,” Gary said consolingly. “It’s not your fault, nor was it the show’s fault. It was mine. I was having a tough time. I told you that. I feel like I was juggling so many things at ones. I kept dropping and failing at other things and I couldn’t pick them back up without the dropping the others. I just had to drop everything, including the show, so that I could start all over again.”

“And I applaud your courage, oppa. I talked about it with the other members, too,” Jihyo said.

“I knew it, you’ve been talking about me behind my back!” Gary joked.

“Not like that! Whenever we go out to have a drink, you would come up in the conversation. We’d say how much we missed you and hate you for cutting us off. But we applaud your courage. I was jealous of you. I wish I have the courage to do what you did. To just drop everything and start again. And live life the way you wanted,” Jihyo cried.

“Nah, it wasn’t easy. I can’t say I’m living the life the way I wanted. I stopped watching the show, did you know that? At first, I would watch you guys; episode after episode without me. It was hard. I would watch the show and thought, what would I have done? I should have been there. What am I doing here? I even worried about you, guys. They weren’t taking care of you. When I heard the news of you and Jongkook… I was so mad! I wanted to come back and beat the hell out of everyone who made you cry. But I didn’t. I felt ashamed. I blamed myself for leaving… for giving them an excuse to change things around… for not being able to protect you—“

“That’s all in the past, oppa,” Jihyo comforted him.

“I know. But every time I watch the show, I kept thinking, how much you’re all trying and working so hard, that you must be suffering and I was the only one who gave up. Because of what I did… I felt like a traitor, the biggest traitor the show ever—“

“That’s not true!”

“But that’s what it felt for me. I felt like I jumped out of a sinking ship to save myself and abandoned you guys. And week after week I watch you all swim the tide and try to live on. It would be shameless for me to come back. When the new members came, it also gave me renewed hope. But, I think,” Gary paused to give a dry laugh. “You guys were doing great and I felt even more shameful because I was a little envious. I got married then, with a baby on the way. The responsibilities piled up and that’s okay. I couldn’t concentrate on music any more than I did when I was doing Running Man but that’s okay. But when the checks came in and I realized I’m barely making a tenth of what I used to earn. I can’t help but look back on the days when I had so much. The fans, the money, the prestige. True, I missed it. However, I would only need to look across the room and see my wife and my son, I didn’t have a lot to offer, but they’d look at me and smile. Its love that money or fame can’t buy. I knew I made the right choice, no matter how hard,” Gary smiled.

“I want to meet her, and your son, too. I’m happy that you’re happy, oppa,” Jihyo’s eyes were shining.

“What about you?” Gary asked. “Are you happy?” Gary added when Jihyo didn’t answer.

“I came here… Because I wanted to know what it felt like for someone like you to give up on something you love doing,” said Jihyo.

 “Someone like me? Why?” Gary raised his eyebrows.

“Nothing. Just that… I’ve been thinking of leaving, too,” Jihyo said looking at the floor.

“Running Man? Acting?”

“I don’t know. Running Man, I guess.”

“Why? Is it true? Are they really trying to reduce your screentime?” there was a dangerous glint in Gary’s eyes.

“No, oppa,” Jihyo rushed in alarm although she was glad with Gary’s display of loyalty.

“What about the other members? I can’t help but noti—“

“It’s not that, oppa. There’s just more of us now, so the screentime is naturally reduced. I wasn’t really that funny to begin with. In fact, I feel sorry for Somin. She’s really talented and funny. She couldn’t help it if we get compared. If she came before me, I bet they’d love her more.”

“Don’t say that! You were the one who made Running Man popular. Have you forgotten what Jaesuk hyung said? Having a treasure like you is what made the show different. The new PDs didn’t see that, they were a fool for not protecting you. Is it Hwan Jin this time?” Gary said bitterly.

“Jaesuk oppa was being kind. That was because I was the only girl. Any other actre—“

“Oho! There you go again!”

“It’s true! I’m not as funny as other actresses, admit it! I may have gotten away with it when I was the only girl but now... When they made the decision not to cancel and to bring in new members, I knew it was only to appease the fans, to compromise, to buy us more time. I felt burdened. Like, I’m part of the show just for the heck of it but the show didn’t really need me,” Jihyo confessed.

Gary nodded. He knew how that felt. He felt that way when he decided to leave Running Man. He felt like the show didn’t really need him anymore and that he’s better off spending his time with something he loves just as much—Music.

“I understand. But it’s going to be hard, Jihyo-yah,” Gary said looking into her eyes.

“I know, but I don’t want to continue doing the show feeling like this. I don’t want to keep acting and forcing a smile or a laugh. A lot has changed since you left oppa. To be honest, it’s really not Running Man anymore,” Jihyo said with her head bowed, looking at her hands.

“You should get married,” Gary said suddenly.

“What?”

“Are you dating anyone?”

“No, I… there’s just… no one…”

“Eiiii,” Gary protested. “What have you been doing? You can’t stay single forever. Leaving Running Man would have driven me to depression if it weren’t for my wife. You really need to find somebody to love and who’ll love you just as much. Scratch that, find someone who loves you more than you love him,” Gary said with conviction.

“It’s not that I don’t want to, Oppa. But there’s no one,” Jihyo defended.

“What about your friends? Dong Wook? Or just marry Jongkook—“

“Oppa!”

“Or Kwangsoo?” Gary added.

“Lee Kwangsoo?” Jihyo snorted.

“Why? Kwangsoo always liked you. Really. I was jealous of Kwangsoo more than anyone else,” Gary admitted.

“Why? What do you mean?” Jihyo laughed.

“I’m serious. All those years, do you honestly think I was only doing that for show?” Gary said seriously. Jihyo stopped laughing. She knew, at least during the early days, that Gary liked her for real. She avoided it, even when she wasn’t dating, even when she knew she could’ve liked him back. She was a coward.

“When you broke up with your boss, I really thought I stood a chance. But you were so defensive when it comes to me,” Gary laughed bitterly. “Yet, you let your guard down with Kwangsoo. I was jealous that he gets to be close with you without any issues while I can only watch you from the sides.”

“Oppa…,” Jihyo didn’t really know what to say. Although she was closest with Kwangsoo, Gary was someone she could freely discuss her feelings with. There are things that she couldn’t discuss with Kwangsoo simply because she was supposed to be a dependable noona for him—the one who keeps him grounded when he over reacts. But with Gary, she can be vulnerable. He was really good at expressing himself. While Jongkook likes to solve problems and tells her what to do, Gary oppa listens and nods. He remains calm with those innocent puppy eyes.

“I can say this now because I’m already happy and in love with my wife. You, too, needs someone to take care of you. Whether you leave Running Man or not, find someone who will stay with you through tough times, someone who will respect and accept you, flaws and all,” Gary said in earnest.

“Thank you, oppa. When I do, will you promise to come to my wedding? You missed out Hwan Jin’s wedding and he was really upset. You’re not going to do that to me, are you?” Jihyo said good-naturedly.

“Of course, I wouldn’t miss it. Let us meet the lucky guy, though, we were your brothers for the longest time, I feel entitled to have a say in your relationship,” Gary smugly.

***** I wrote this years ago in 2018, I think. My opinion of 9012 has changed since then but I still want to share this because this is the only one-shot with Monday Couple I could find in my laptop.