Namjoon made his way into the cafeteria, looking around intently, frowning, this must’ve been one of her days off. Normally he knew her schedule, but she’d told him she had to change it since she would be starting college again

Letting out a breath, partially from disappointment and part from relief. As much as he wanted to see her, he also didn’t, it was a complicated thing. She was his friend, actually she was his best friend, amazingly they’d only known each other for about a year, but he could safely say she was one of the best people he knew, and he knew quite a bit of people.

The way they’d met had been kinda…different.

One Year Ago

Namjoon made his way in to get a snack and a larger cup for his coffee, those small white ones they had in the various breakrooms around the building, were never big enough and he always had to get several refills, he’d been debating on getting one of those Keurig machines in his studio.

He headed over to the display of snacks, scanning through to see what he wanted, looking over to find that the kitchen was still open. Maybe a sandwich would be better, a little more filling. Making his way over, he saw a young woman he assumed to be about his age in the back, manning the grill. Her hair was pulled up into a tight bun on the top of her head, a hair net covering it along with one of those weird looking paper hats. She was focused on what she was making, but she must’ve felt eyes on her because she lifted her head and looked right at him and his heart dropped right to the soles of his Timberlands.

She was beautiful.

Not in the traditional way, but Namjoon wasn’t a traditional kinda guy either. She had big, round, brown eyes and wasn’t the small frame that he was used to but had curves and a slightly fuller figure, different from what the standard of what was considered pretty or beautiful there. He was pretty sure she was a foreigner. He swallowed hard, suddenly feeling slightly out of place. She gave him a warm smile and held up a finger, motioning for him to wait a moment and she went back to cooking.

Namjoon stood there, looking around awkwardly, waiting. A few minutes later, she packaged up what she’d been cooking and set it under a heat lamp and came around, pulling the plastic gloves off and wiping her hands on the apron around her waist. He noticed the fine sheen of sweat on her face and he found himself wanting to wipe it away for her.

Making her way over behind the counter, she brought her gaze to his again, giving him another smile.

“Hello,” she said in very cautious Korean.

Definitely not Korean, Namjoon thought to himself.

He bowed, “Hello,” he replied back.

She seemed to be setting herself up, she asked him, slowly, in Korean what he wanted, watching him apprehensively, he could tell she was hoping he wouldn’t ask her to repeat.

“I can speak English if that will make it easier,” he smiled.

The smile she gave him was positively radiant as relief washed over her face.

“Thank you! I though it was you and I know you speak English, but I didn’t want to be rude and ask you to speak it here in your own country and…whew,” she blew out a breath.

His heart fluttered and he shook his head, “It’s fine, no problem.”

“Namjoon Kim right?” She smiled, looking way more comfortable than she had a few seconds ago.

She knew who he was! She’d literally just said that she did, but for all he knew, she could’ve just said that and really had no idea.

“Yes, that’s right.”

“Well then Namjoon, what can I get for you?”

He blinked, “Oh…uh…I…” he looked up at the menu that changed on occasion, trying to find something he wanted.

“Might I suggest that Inkigayo sandwich? I hear it’s really popular, we just got the stuff for it,” she suggested.

Namjoon looked down at her, “You like it?”

“Nah, not really, not a fan of egg salad and it mixed with the jam is kinda weird. Don’t get me wrong, if you’re down for that kinda thing, rock it, but that doesn’t do it for me,” she shrugged.

He grinned, “Well I’ll give that a try and…uhh…some kimbaps please.”

She nodded, writing it down, “What kinds?”

“Two vegetable, one ueong jorim and one classic please.”

“Oookay, anything else?” She asked, looking up at him.

Namjoon wanted to stay and keep talking to her, but if he ordered much more…

“You look like a pear kinda guy, you like pears right?” She smiled.

“Well yes, yes I do.”

“I think you should go for that, they’re fresh in, nice and sweet…I may or may not have sampled a few pieces when I was cutting it, but you didn’t hear that from me and I’ll deny it if anyone asks,” she said firmly.

Namjoon chuckled, “Ok, pears it is.”

She nodded, “Good choice, anything else?”

“An extra large coffee please, one sugar and that’ll be it,” he finished.

He couldn’t stay around forever and order stuff, that and he heard a few people coming in.

“Ok, it’ll be fifteen minutes,” she smiled, taring the sheet with his order off.

“Thanks,” he smiled, watching as she turned and headed into the kitchen, getting a bag of bread and starting to open it.

Ten minutes later, he heard his name being called and he looked over to see a bag on the counter and the woman at the register, ringing it up.

“Ok, that’ll be eleven thousand, six hundred and…ninety nine won please,” she said, staring hard at the register before looking up at him.

Namjoon nodded and dug through his wallet.

“I’m sorry but…did I do that right?”

He looked up at her, blinking.

“Sorry, this currency confuses me. I’ve made a few mistakes and people tend to get mad and so…” she looked at the register and then at him again.

“Ahhh,” he nodded, “Yeah, I know how that goes. Let’s see,” he looked up at the menu, counting everything up and then looked at the register and nodded. “Yup, that sounds about right.”

“Ok good, it’s very different from dollars, that’s for sure. I’m sorry to bother you.”

“You didn’t bother me at all. Dollars huh? So, you’re from America?”

She nodded, “That’s right, only been here for about six months and this is my second job. I got fired from my last one for making so many mistakes, be it with protocol or with the language,” she sighed. “This has been quite the adjustment.”

Namjoon frowned, “I’m sorry you’ve been having such a hard time.”

“It’s to be expected, I’m trying you know? I don’t mean to offend, but I get the impression that some people think I’m doing it on purpose,” she frowned.

“Hang in there, it’ll get easier the more you do it. If you need help, let me know,” he smiled, handing her the money.

She stared at him, giving him a gentle smile, “Thanks Namjoon, that’s real decent of you. I will probably take you up on that offer, so you can’t take it back now.”

He laughed again, “Alright.”

After giving him the correct change with a little help from him, he took his bag and his piping hot cup of coffee.

“Thanks a lot, come again,” she smiled

 “I sure will.”

“Oh, and can I call you Namjoon? Is that cool? Not like I haven’t called you that this whole time but…”

“I don’t mind at all,” he smiled.

~~~ 

 

That was a year ago and now here he was, pretty sure he’d fallen for the cafeteria woman. He’d made numerous trips to the cafeteria since, whenever he was home and at the studio and sometimes stopping by even when he didn’t have to be there just so he could see her.

He had it bad.

Namjoon loved it though and he may just love her as well. She was sweet and kind and awkward and had an amazing sense of humor. Still and all, he’d seen her struggle to fit in, to adjust and even though it’d been over a year, she still had a hard time. The culture and customs here were so different from the States, he saw her trying hard to make it, but he could tell her courage had started to fade a bit.

For his part, he did try to help as much as he could, just like he said he would and while she’d said she’d take him up on his offer, she never really did. He could tell she really didn’t want him to feel obligated to her and that she wanted to figure things out on her own, but it was just too hard. He knew how difficult of a time him and s had had in the beginning when they were adjusting to American culture and customs, if it hadn’t been for his managers and friends, it would’ve been even harder. She didn’t have that luxury here apparently and he felt it was only right she had someone in her corner, he wanted to be that someone.

She had met all s at some point or another and they each had relentlessly that he had feelings for her. He’d denied it emphatically for months, until just recently when V had told him he’d seen her talking to one of the staff who’d been flirting with her. Namjoon had literally seen red and had resorted to grilling V for any additional information on who the staff member was only to find out in the end that he’d been lying and they all had had a hearty laugh at his expense. It was then he could no longer deny his growing feelings for her.

Also, seemingly everyone else around him was happily in a relationship. He would watch in envy, longing, his managers and his cordi noonas and dancers and all, hoping that he could have someone too. His job made it hard, made it hard for all of them, but Namjoon had promised himself should he find someone that he really liked, really and truly liked, he’d make it work somehow, he’d found that person.

It wasn’t so easy as just acknowledging it though, that was only half the battle. He had to work up the nerve to tell her, to see if she felt the same. He’d tried, tried to send subtle messages, giving her light touches, calling and texting her as often as he could. Still she treated him the same, like a good friend, he hoped they could be more, more than just friends.

Seems like everyone else has a love just for them
I don't mind; we have such a good time, my best friend
But sometimes, well I wish we could be more than friends
Tell me, do you know?
Tell me, do you know?
Oh

 

“Namie!!!”

He looked over at the familiar nickname, his heart starting to pound frantically. Hurrying out the kitchen, a broad smile on her face as she gave him a wave, coming closer. He let out a breath, he always seemed to find it difficult to breathe whenever she was around, whenever she called his name. She’d decided early on to call him “Namie”, she said it just rolled off the tongue, that and Nam and he didn’t care what she called him so long as she called for him.

“Hello,” he smiled widely, clearing his throat that had suddenly gone dry.

“I didn’t even see you come in; how long have you been standing here?” She frowned, looking up into his eyes.

“Not long, just a few minutes.”

“You shoulda said something, geeze. Hang on, it’s just about breaktime, do you have some time to hang out with me while I have lunch?”

He nodded, “Sure.”

He’d purposely cleared his schedule to make sure he had time to have lunch with her.

“Great, I’ll be right back, have a seat,” she called as she hurried back into the kitchen.

Namjoon took a seat at one of the tables, pulling his phone out and shooting off a quick message to Hoseok letting him know he would meet up with him later to go over the lyrics and beats for the song they were collaborating on. He rolled his eyes when Hoseok told him to enjoy his “date”. Namjoon flipped his phone closed, setting it on the table, drumming his fingers impatiently.

“Sorry, here I am,” she said suddenly, coming up next to him.

He straightened up a bit and looked at her as she sat, a large book in her arms along with something that looked like kimbaps wrapped in foil.

“Look, I got this new book for my class, I brought it with me to study, I was hoping you’d stop by so we could look at it together,” she grinned, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Ooo really?” He said excitedly.

“Mmm hmm, of course,” she said, opening the book and moving her chair closer to him.

Namjoon let out another breath, swallowing hard as she moved in closer, so close he could feel the heat from her body, feel her work shirt brushing against his arm.

“We’re learning about the Baroque period right now, see here,” she flipped to a specific page. “I was looking at this in class and I thought of you.”

He glanced at the page before looking discreetly back up at her. When she’d told him she was an English Lit major with a minor in Art History, he’d didn’t think things could get much better. She loved art almost as much as him, though she’d told him that English was more her focus. She loved words and writing and hoped to get a book published at some point along with becoming a screenplay writer and that Korea had a really great creative arts program that she had been able to get into.

Often she’d bring her homework with her to study on her breaks or on downtime, he’d come by several times to see her studying in the empty cafeteria, sometimes well into the early hours in the morning. He’d join her when he couldn’t sleep or when he needed inspiration or felt overwhelmed with his life, he’d come by the company, hoping she’d be there. They’d sit and talk and she’d give him advice and he did the same for her. They never really met outside the company, too risky, but it didn’t matter it seemed.

“I thought this would be right up your alley, I brought my notes so you can take a look at them,” she explained as she opened one of the foil wrapped items to reveal a kimbap just like Namjoon thought.

Suddenly producing a knife out of nowhere it seemed, she cut it in half, sliding one half over to him before picking up her piece and taking a massive bite. Namjoon watched her adoringly.

“I was thinking of brying bifs sometime,” she muttered around the roll in . “I dunno though,” she chewed intently, looking at the page. “I don’t know that I could do this style too well, it’s not really my strong point, not that painting is so much,” she said, taking another slightly smaller bite than the first. “But I am binda curious ab to bow it would burn out,” she said, full.

Namjoon couldn’t help but chuckle, she was so cute. He looked down at her notes, reading through them. “Well from what you’ve shown me of your prior art, I think you could handle it…mmmph!” he announced, his eyes widening as she stuffed the other half of kimbap in his mouth before looking back down.

“Hmm, well if I get some free time this weekend I’ll give it a try,” she nodded, shoving the last bite of kimbap in before opening the other and cutting that one in half as well.

Namjoon chewed the kimbap quickly, at his lips, “Thanks.”

Nodding, she picked up the other kimbap and took a large bite before looking up at him, stopping suddenly, “What?”

He blinked, “Huh?”

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?”

She smiled suddenly, taking another bite of her roll, raising an eyebrow, “Is there something you want to tell me Nam?”

“Uhh…uhh…”

“You look so giddy, so deliriously happy, what’s going on?” She giggled.

I get so breathless when you call my name
I've often wondered, do you feel the same?
There's a chemistry, energy, a synchronicity when we're all alone
So don't tell me you can't see what I'm thinking of

 

Did she know? Could she possibly realize how badly he wanted her to be his?

“Did something go well with the album? Did you finally get those lyrics taken care of with Hoseok?”

“Well yeah, I mean we’re still working on it and I’m going to go see him in a little while…”

“Uh huh…”

“That’s it real…”

“Hyung…oh, hi noona!”

She looked up and smiled gently, “Hey Jimin.”

“I’ve been looking everywhere for you hyung, I had a feeling you might be here,” Jimin said, sitting quickly next to Namjoon, grinning wickedly at him.

Namjoon gave him a warning look before glancing at her who was watching the two in amusement.

“Oh yeah?” Namjoon said, raising an eyebrow at Jimin.

“Ne, we know you always like to spend time here in the cafeteria. Ya know noona, Namjoon hyung tells us all the time how much he really loves coming here, that there’s always a certain someone he wants to see…” Jimin grinned.

Her eyes widened and she looked over at Namjoon, “Oh? Is that so?”

Namjoon glared at Jimin who just continued to grin, “Well sure, I mean you know, there’s a lot of people here that I know of course and that I get to see here…in the cafeteria.”

“Uh huh, and is this person the reason why you look so happy right now?” She grinned, wiggling her eyebrows at him.

“I think so,” Jimin said suddenly, nudging her in the arm. “He won’t tell us, but I think this certain someone is one that he likes.”

Her eyes widened, “Really? Really Nam!?” She almost squealed.

Namjoon let out a breath, looking over at Jimin and letting him know that he was dead when he got him alone. “I like a lot of people.”

Jimin watched him carefully, raising an eyebrow before looking back over at her, “Noona, are you single?”

She looked over at Jimin, “Me? Of course I’m single, no guy is interested in me, I’m too weird,” she laughed.

Jimin nudged Namjoon discretely with his arm, “That’s not true, I think a lot of guys would be interested in you, like say…a good friend. Would you ever date a friend noona?”

“Hmmm,” she took a bite of the remaining kimbap and considered the question, “I dunno, depends on if we’re compatible. I mean, I wouldn’t want to ruin a friendship with a relationship if it didn’t work out, I wouldn’t want us to end up hating each other at the end you know?” She reasoned, shoving the last piece in , chewing intently.

Jimin nodded solemnly, “Sure, I get it. So then…what about Namjoon hyung?”

Namjoon’s eyes widened and his foot shot out, kicking Jimin.

“Ouch! Hyung!” Jimin whimpered, reaching down to rub at his leg.

She looked over at Namjoon, “Namjoon?”

“Don’t pay him any mind,” Namjoon said, giving Jimin a death glare.

“Hmmm well Namjoon…I mean sure, why not? I would be worried about taking that step, but if Namjoon were interested in me and me interested in him, I’d say why not? You’re a good guy, I think it’d be worth it to at least try,” she shrugged, gathering up the discarded foil and bunching it up into a ball.

Namjoon went still, looking at her and Jimin smiled brilliantly.

“Really noona?”

“Sure, Nam is a great catch, any woman would be lucky to have him,” she nodded.

“So, do you like hyu…”

“Ok we’re going now,” Namjoon said suddenly, grabbing the remaining half of kimbap from off the table and shoving it into Jimin’s mouth forcefully as he pulled him up out the chair by the collar of his shirt.

“Aww so soon?” She frowned as she stood, closing the book up.

“Mmm hmm, gotta get back to work and I have something I forgot that I have to do with Jimin,” Namjoon grated out, wrapping his arm around Jimin’s shoulder and giving a firm squeeze.

Jimin continued to chew on the roll, grinning devilishly, squirming out of reach of Namjoon, “I’m outta here! See ya noona!” He called out through the roll in his mouth before bolting out the cafeteria.

She chuckled, waving at Jimin as he hurried out and then looked over at Namjoon, “I’ll see you later too, ok? Thanks for hanging out with me.”

Namjoon looked at her longingly, “See you later.”

He watched as she walked off, sighing heavily.

I can understand that you don't want to cross the line
And you know I can't promise you things will turn out fine
But I have to be honest: I want you to be mine
Tell me, do you know?
Tell me, do you know?
Oh

 

Namjoon slumped back in his chair, he wasn’t getting much done, he couldn’t concentrate. Hoseok would be coming by shortly and he was barely prepared. Ever since the incident in the cafeteria earlier, he hadn’t been able to focus.  

He couldn’t believe Jimin had done that, he was in shock. Granted he’d learned a lot, but really, he couldn’t believe he’d done that! Still, when she’d said he was a great catch and that any woman would be lucky to have him, did that include herself? Namjoon had always been a humble guy, not taking things for granted, but he really hoped that she meant what she’d said, not that other women felt that way about him, but that she felt that way about him.

He got up out his chair, starting to pace around the room restlessly. Should he take the chance and say something to her? He tried to give off little subtle hints, but nothing seemed to work, she didn’t seem to understand what he was feeling. He wasn’t the kind of guy to be overly bold, not really, at least not when it came to women. When it came to work and music, that was a different story entirely. He didn’t want to ruin their friendship either, but he was fast learning that friendship simply wasn’t enough for him anymore, he wanted, no…needed more.

Flopping down on the couch, he let his head fall back to the wall, closing his eyes. He had to think this through, it would change everything if they decided to date. It’d been a long time since his last relationship and it’d ended badly, with her bitter due to his success and her own struggles. He’d figured dating someone from the industry would make things easier, but she felt differently, always talking about how they were in competition with each other and she couldn’t take the fact that things were taking off for him, but not for her group as they continued to struggle. He’d tried to be supportive, but to no avail, she’d ended the relationship and at that point, he’d felt relief. It most certainly didn’t feel as great as he thought it would to have a girlfriend at that point. That had been three years ago, things were different now, not so much work wise as he’d gotten even busier, but he now felt ready to try for a relationship again.

It wasn’t all about him though, she was special, important, and she was a working woman, going to school, trying to make a life for herself. She wasn’t in the business, but he didn’t want to do anything that could potentially ruin it if it got out that they were…

He shook his head, opening his eyes. He was getting ahead of himself here, he didn’t even know if they were going to date, didn’t even know if she liked him in that way. Would she be willing to take that chance? Would she be willing to have her whole life turned upside down to date him? Namjoon would never forgive himself if he ended up hurting her unintentionally, dating him wouldn’t be easy, but then again nothing in life worth having or doing ever was.

There was a knock at the door and he sighed heavily, feeling no closer to a resolution than before.

“C’mon in Hoseok,” he called.

The door opened and in walked Hoseok. He looked over Namjoon on the couch and grinned.

“Thinking about her?” He smirked.

Namjoon frowned and stood, heading over to his chair and sitting, “So, I was thinking that for these lyrics and with the beat, we should have something in two four time, and then heavy with the bass.”

Hoseok sat next to him, the grin permanently plastered on his face, “Uh huh.”

“I mixed this here, tell me what you think,” Namjoon said, starting up the track.

Hoseok raised an eyebrow but turned to focus on the task at hand.

Two Hours Later

Hoseok nodded, making some notes on the papers he brought, “This sounds good, I think we’re…yah, Namjoon…”

Namjoon looked over at him, blinking, “Huh?”

Hoseok threw the pen down and leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest, regarding Namjoon thoughtfully. “I’m surprised we got anything done tonight at all, you’re a mess man.”

“What? I am not.”

“Yeah you are, look…you wanna talk about it? Jimin told me what happened in the cafeteria,” Hoseok said, giving him an imploring look.

Namjoon stared at him a moment before slumping in the chair, “I’m in love.”

“Tell me something I don’t know.”

He looked up at him and Hoseok chuckled.

“Sorry, not trying to irratate you but, we all knew that already, just took you a while to acknowledge it. So, what are you gonna do about it? You already know she’d be willing to take the chance.”

“Do I? I mean, yeah she said that but…but what if she didn’t mean it? The question was posed as hypothetical, she wasn’t taking it seriously. Besides, she coulda just been trying to be nice since I was sitting right there,” he stated softly, fiddling around idly with some buttons on the keyboard.

Hoseok shrugged, “You don’t, and you won’t until you say something. It is a risk, but it’s gotta be a risk you’re willing to take if you ever want even the slightest chance to be with her as more than friends.”

“I dunno man, I want to be with her, but…I don’t want to lose her if it doesn’t work out either. It’s not like before, I really care about this woman,” Namjoon sighed, feeling out of control.

People came to him for leadership all the time, they always thought he had the answers, but he didn’t, he couldn’t even handle his own love life, or lack thereof.

Hoseok reached out, giving his shoulder a squeeze, “I know, but if you care about each other, then…you gotta try.”

Namjoon bit his lip, looking up at his friend, “What do I do? How do I say it?” He asked softly, uncertainty on his face.

Hoseok smiled, “Be romantic, c’mon, I know you have it in you. I know you don’t show your emotions much, I get it, but I know it’s in you, you’ve just been waiting for the right woman. Pull out all the stops, let her know that being with you is worth the risk. Don’t give her a chance to even think otherwise.”

He took a calming breath, romantic…he hadn’t even done that with his ex, never had the motivation to put the effort forth. Now was the time, he was ready and willing and while he hadn’t much in the past, it was definitely something he was capable of. He looked over at Hoseok who wiggled his eyebrows and Namjoon chuckled.

Romance it was.

~~~ 

He paced back and forth in his studio, rubbing his hands together nervously. Everything was ready, he looked down at the small table that was overrun with food. He should’ve known better than to ask Jungkook for food ideas, he should’ve gone to Jin hyung, but he didn’t want it to be fancy like he knew hyung would practically insist, just some basic foods, something casual and Jungkook was good with casual.

Namjoon had known Jungkook long enough to know that he knew all about good snacks and casual foods, but once he got to recommending, he went a bit overboard. Still, Namjoon was grateful for the help, that included Jimin who wanted to make up for interfering, or at least he said and brought him some roses to put in a small vase and then Taehyung provided him some music to listen to via a playlist from Spotify.

He looked over at the bottles of sparkling water cooling in a mini cooler he brought that were Yoongi hyung’s idea, telling him that he knew for a fact that she wasn’t much of a drinker and that she preferred a certain specific drink from home. Namjoon had gone to seven different stores that sold international foods to find only one that had it and bought out their entire stock, including what was in back that hadn’t even been brought out yet. When he’d asked Yoongi how he’d known, he’d simply responded that he just knew and that was it.

Yoongi was full of mysteries.

Jin hyung not to be left out, suggested that if he runs out of conversation, to mention him as a topic of interest. Namjoon assured him he would be his go to if such a situation arose.

Namjoon walked over and sat in his chair, grabbing his cup and taking a drink of the now cold coffee. He had to get more but didn’t want to go to the cafeteria since she wouldn’t be there, she always made the best coffee, just the way he liked it.

There was a knock at the door, and he bolted up out of his chair, clearing his throat and running his fingers through his hair. In hindsight, inviting her to his studio wasn’t probably the best idea, but he felt more comfortable there and it wasn’t as if they could really go out. Swallowing hard, he made his way over, unlocking the door, taking a breath before swinging it open, his eyes widening.

“Bet you thought I was her huh?” Jimin grinned.

Namjoon frowned, why did everyone always have to come and interrupt him?

“What’s up Jimin?”

“She’s really not here?” Jimin asked, poking his head in to look around.

Namjoon closed the door more, “No.”

“Aww that’s too bad, I can keep you company until she shows up,” he grinned.

“Uh…”

Jimin chuckled, “I’m just kidding man, I’m gonna go, good luck! Have fun, fighting!”

Namjoon nodded and watched as a highly amused Jimin walked off. He went to shut the door when Jin suddenly showed up.

“Yah, is she in there?” He whispered, trying to peek in.

“What? No, she’s not here yet,” Namjoon sighed.

Jin frowned, “No? Where is she?”

“She’s on her way hyung.”

“Mmm, well remember, use me if you need conversation topics, in fact…here,” Jin announced, handing him something.

Namjoon took the object to reveal a picture of Jin, he looked up him in shock.

“For inspiration,” Jin winked, patting him on the shoulder before walking off.

Namjoon stared at him in awe, shaking his head as he slowly shut the door.

He made his way back to his chair, setting the picture face down on the table, when there was another knock at the door. Rolling his eyes, he hurried over, yanking the door open.

“Look, I’m gonna handle this on my…” He stopped, his eyes widening.

“Well ok then, handle it,” she chuckled.

He blinked, and looked up, seeing Jimin and Jin waving frantically at him, giggling and making kissy faces at him before ducking around the corner.

He looked down at her, giving her an embarrassed smile, “Sorry, it’s just that the guys…never mind, come in,” he said, stepping back and gesturing for her to come in.

She smiled and made her way in, stopping when she saw the table, “Whoa, am I interrupting something?”

Namjoon shut and locked the door, turning quickly, “No no, not at all. I mean, this is for…us.”

She turned to look at him, “Us.”

He chewed on his lip and just noticed she had something in her hands, “Whatcha got there?” He asked suddenly, desperate for a change in subject.

“Huh? Oh, these are for you,” she smiled, holding out the wrapped objects to him.

“For me? You didn’t have to…”

“Sure I did, you need this, trust me,” she grinned.

“Oh, have a seat,” he said, pointing to the couch.

She made her way over and sat, looking at the spread of foods laid out, “This is quite the spread you’ve got here.”

Namjoon carefully sat next to her, “Feel free to eat, I got this for us to enjoy and so…”

“Really? Wow, there’s a lot of great snacks and foods here, are you sure it’s ok? If you’re expecting someone, I can leave…”

“I am only expecting you,” he said softly.

She looked up at him, “Me? All this for me and you?”

Namjoon smiled, “That’s right.”

“Oh,” she said softly, looking at the table, still looking hesitant.

He looked at the box that had been wrapped with colorful wrapping paper, with the handle cut out on the top and also another smaller wrapped box.

“Go on, open it.”

Namjoon looked over at her who was watching him excitedly. He carefully set the one box down and then started opening the large box, his eyes widening.

She’d gotten him Keurig.

“Ahhh do you like it? I remembered you saying you were thinking about getting one, but couldn’t decide and knowing you you’d end up talking yourself out of it like you always do with stuff, so I figured I’d just get you one. You drink so much coffee and you spend a fortune on the coffee in the cafeteria and this will make it so much easier. Now you won’t have to make so many trips in, not that I don’t want to see you of course, but now you don’t have to come just for coffee,” she explained, taking the other box and handing it to him.

Namjoon was floored, he knew she didn’t make a lot and with school and all, she was always strapped for money and as he opened the smaller package to reveal a box of Keurig coffee cups, he sighed, he loved her even more after this. It was the best gift he’d gotten from anyone, ever.

“Those are better than what they have in the cafeteria, trust me. I don’t drink coffee, but everyone I know that does that has a Keurig, tells me that is amazing, they wouldn’t steer me wrong and so…I won’t steer you wrong. Try it, you won’t be sorry and if you are, I blame my friends,” she stated.

Namjoon smiled, setting the box down before turning to look at her, “Thank you,” he said softly.

She blinked, and Namjoon detected a hint of red on her cheeks.

“It’s nothing, not anything big, I just…just wanted you to have one. I hope you’ll still come and visit me from time to time though, even though you’ll have your own amazing coffee.”

Namjoon stared at her, his heart once again in his eyes, “I’ll always come to see you, I don’t need coffee or food to want to be around you.”

She swallowed hard, her eyes widening at his intense gaze and she cleared , looking down at the table, “So you’re sure I can eat this?”

“Mmm hmm, here,” he offered, reaching out and taking a strawberry and dragging it through some chocolate syrup and holding it out to her.

“Ohhh I love chocolate covered strawberries,” she sighed, reaching out to take it, but he pulled it away.

“Allow me,” he said quietly.

“O-oh, ok then…” she hesitated a moment before leaning in and taking a small bite, at her lips.

Namjoon felt it all over, his heart pounding as her tongue came out to swipe over her lips. He locked eyes with her as he put the rest of the berry in his mouth, smiling suddenly, “Mmm it is good.”

She rubbed at her chest, letting out a breath before reaching out and grabbing a half of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and taking a large bite, sighing happily, “I haven’t had one of these since I left home, tastes so good.”

His heart swelled, Jungkook had been right after all, “You like those?”

“Hell yeah! Used to have them all the time at home, I love them with banana too, and fluffernutters! Yum!”

“You actually like fluffernutters?”

“Yes! Tell me you’ve had one!”

Namjoon shook his head, “Ani, I haven’t, but Jungkook told me to make some and that you’d probably like it…”

“Wait, you have some here?” She asked excitedly.

“Yeah, they’re…right…here,” he announced, pulling the sandwich from below and holding the half out to her.

“No way!” She took the half and took bite, groaning. “Ooooh man, beese are soo boood!” She moaned, at her lips, but managing to miss a dab of marshmallow.

Namjoon couldn’t help himself as he reached out, wiping at the small smear of marshmallow, causing her to go completely still, her eyes on him the whole time. Feeling daring, probably from the sugar and pure adrenaline he was running off of, he leaned in, taking the other half of sandwich and biting into it, pulling it from her fingers with his mouth, chewing intently.

“It is good, a bit sweet, but good. I also made one with Nutella too,” he winked, at his lips.

She continued to stare at him, at her lips nervously, “O-oh yeah? Nutella huh?

Namjoon nodded, getting another half a sandwich and holding it out to her, “Here, have some.”

“You know, I shouldn’t be eating all these, I’m gonna become as big as the all outdoors and no one is gonna wanna…”

“You look perfect, you don’t even need to worry, here…ahhh…” he cut her off, pressing the sandwich close to .

She went to respond, when he pushed it in and she took a bite, chewing slowly. She watched him and Namjoon could tell she was trying to figure out what was going on, but also looked decidedly flustered and he knew he had to be careful plying her with food and all.

Reaching into the cooler, he pulled out one of the bottles of water, hoping that Yoongi had been right and held it out to her, her eyes lit up.

“Hey! That’s my favorite, how’d you know?!”

He would find a way to have a basketball hoop installed on the grounds somewhere.

Namjoon shrugged, “I heard that you liked it from Yoongi hyung and so…”

“These are so hard to find here, I know, I tried! Wow, thanks Nam,” she smiled, taking the bottle, opening and taking a long drink.

After they finished eating and cleaned up, with Namjoon insisting that she take the rest of the bottles of her favorite drink home, they sat on the couch. Namjoon was tense, knowing the moment had come.

“Ya know Nam, I’ve been wondering why you invited me here to your studio. Normally we meet in the cafeteria, but you wanted me to come here outside of work, is everything ok?”

“Sure, I just wanted to see you, I wanted to talk to you.”

Slowly she sat up and looked at him and for the first time in the year since he’d met her, he saw genuine fear in her eyes.

“Nam, is…is everything ok? With us I mean? Did you…are you going to…”

“Am I going to what?” He asked cautiously. Had she finally figured it out and let him off the hook of actually having to confess?

“Are you going to stop being friends with me?”

No, apparently not.

He blinked, “What?”

“Well you’re super famous, you have all kinds of celebrity friends and I’m just the cafeteria lady and well…I’m not glamorous and famous and I thought maybe you wouldn’t want to be friends anymore…” she finished softly, her voice barely above a whisper as she lowered her gaze to her hands.

“Ohhh jagi no,” Namjoon frowned.

“I thought that’s why you asked me here, to let me down easy. You had some of my favorite foods and drinks and all and I figured this was it.”

“No, not at all! Jungkook gave me suggestions of some of his favorite American snacks and foods and so I got them and made the sandwiches them thinking you may like them and…no, I don’t want to stop being friends with you, in fact…”

He stopped, looking away.

“In fact what?” She questioned.

This was it, this was the moment, his heart was racing so fast he was beginning to feel lightheaded, kind of the way he felt before the winner of an award was announced.

“I just…just…” Namjoon looked over at his, his eyes earnest and intent. “I just wanted to tell you how much I value our friendship and…you.”

She blinked, watching him closely.

“And that…that I think you’re amazing. I know how hard it is to come to a foreign country and to try to fit in and learn the customs and culture and most people give up, and yet, you keep going. I can see the fear and hesitation and I know that during this year that we’ve known each other, I can see you starting to falter and doubt yourself a bit…”

Looked away, she let out a breath.

Namjoon rushed to speak again, “I’m not saying this to make you feel bad, but I just want you to know that I see you. I see all the work you’ve been doing and how you’ve been struggling to learn and how hard you’ve been trying and that I…I see you.”

She looked back over at him, a small smile on her lips, “Thank you Namjoon, really.”

He shook his head, “That’s…not all.”

“It’s not?”

“No, not by a longshot. I’ve been trying to tell you, well maybe not verbally, but with my gestures, with…everything I have in me that, that I think you’re great.”

She smiled wider, “Thanks, I think you’re pretty great too.”

Frustration grew suddenly and he stood up off the couch, starting to pace, why didn’t she see it? Why didn’t she realize?

'Cause I've tried to do this right in your own time
I've been telling with my eyes my heart's on fire; why don't you realize?
Tell me, do you know?
Tell me, do you know?

“No, no that’s not all it is,” he said, running his hands through his hair.

She frowned, “Nam?”

He shook his head and stopped, standing in the center of the room looking at her, his breathing labored, and he let the words flow from his lips, “I like you.”

She blinked, “I like you too…”

“No, I like you, I really really…like you,” he said painfully, agony in his voice. “Being around you, near you is painful. I want…so much to be with you, all the time and you don’t seem to realize. The sound of your voice, the touch of your hand drives me crazy in the best way. I long to see you, every day. There’s a reason I make so many trips to the cafeteria, and it’s not for the coffee, or the sandwiches or anything, it’s to see you, to be near you,” he blurted out.

Her eyes widened, her jaw dropping as she listened to him.

Slowly he made his way over, sitting back down next to her and taking her hands in his, he looked down at their hands, his vision going blurry suddenly and unexpectedly.

“I…care about you, so much, I just want you to see it. I’ve tried, it’s not easy for me to say how I feel, I don’t express well unless it’s in music. I thought of rapping a song for you but…” he let out a shaky breath, looking back up at her finally to see her startled expression. “I wanted to tell you that I love you, I wanted you to hear it from my lips as I looked into your eyes. I love you, I really do and I want to be with you,” he finished, blinking quickly, trying to stop the tears from spilling down his cheeks.

“Oh…Namjoon,” she whispered, her eyes starting to well up a bit.

“I’m not good at this, I’m sorry, I didn’t know any other way to do it. Hoseok said I should try romance and I got all this food so you’d be comfortable, with things from your home and my studio is like my second home, it’s comfortable and I wanted to share it with you because I care about you and I…” he shook his head, looking back down, playing with her fingers gently, nervously. “You told Jimin that you’d be willing to take the chance for me, that any woman would be lucky to have me…could you be that woman? Could you, would you be willing to take that chance on me? Please?” He whispered imploringly.

“Are you sure you want to take that chance on me?”

He looked up quickly to see her looking at him nervously, her chin quivering a bit.

“I’m not…I’m not like the women you’re used to. I’m a student in college, struggling to make my way through. I’m learning about living here, I’m not rich or beautiful or pretty…barely cute, just an average woman, a foreigner with nothing to offer to you. Are you sure you want to take a risk with me?”

She was asking him if he wanted to take that risk and all this time, all these months of worrying if she wanted to take the risk on him. Namjoon chuckled a bit, reaching out and cupping her cheek in his hand.

“You’d be the best risk I’d ever be willing to take. I’ve thought of nothing these past few months than to make you mine,” he said softly.

She shook her head incredulously, “Namjoon…”

“Ya know, I’ve been to a lot of different countries, seen a lot of different things, met a lot of different people. One thing I’ve learned is that life is precious, and chances are only once in a lifetime. I don’t care what your job is, and I don’t care how much money you have or anything superficial like that, I care about you and the fact that you are an amazing woman that’ve grown to love very much. You and me, us, we’re once in a lifetime. I think we owe it to ourselves to try, I don’t know the outcome, but I do know that my life will be even better, that much sweeter, with you in it,” he said softly.

She stared at him, tears spilling over and down her cheeks as she gave him a warm smile, turning her hands in his to hold them tightly.

“Ok, let’s try then alright?”

Namjoon smiled broadly, his heart pounding even harder, “Really?”

“Yeah, let’s give us a try,” she sniffled nodding, reaching up to wipe at her eyes. “I’d be pretty foolish to turn down a man who made me peanut butter and jelly sandwiches,” she smiled, tears streaming down her cheeks again.

He chuckled, leaning in suddenly and kissing her deeply. Namjoon felt her hand come up, cupping his cheek gently before pulling away, resting his forehead against hers for a moment before pulling her into his arms, hugging her tightly.

I get so breathless when you call me name
I've often wondered, do you feel the same?
There's a chemistry, energy, a synchronicity when we're all alone
So don't tell me (don't you tell me) you can't see what I'm thinking of

Song: Breathless by Corinne Bailey Rae

Lyrics from: LyricFind

YT Video Courtesy of YT Channel Corinne Bailey Rae