The word called forever is so far fetched. Forever can't never be achieved as one will always leave the other. That what San feel. The one year he try to get back on his feet, bring that conclusion to him.

He know Wooyoung when the two of them five years old. A child who doesn't know anything except playing. It start with a fight that he now doesn't even remember the reason of it. His mother said they fight over the exact same carton of milk. Though there other same milk and lots of it. Friendship sometimes start with fight and he glad to fight over milk again. If only he could.

"Here" milk from in his sight. He takes it and give his "Thanks" The other guy takes a seat next to him. The two of them is in school, sitting on a bench outside. They are taking some rest from too much learning.

San looked at milk in his hand and ask "Wooyoung, how long did we become friend?"

"Around ten years?" He not totally confident with that. Taking a sip of his share of milk. "I don't remember. I think we know each other around kindergarten? Why you ask?"

"My mother said you haven't come by to our house lately. And she spoke about how we become friend"

"Owh. How did we become friend? I don't even remember what happen when I'm ten anymore" Wooyoung interested to know.

"She said we're fighting over the same carton of milk" inform San who began to open his milk and drink it.

Wooyoung nodded. "I can imagine I'm fighting. But over a carton of milk. Wow. I never think I would do something like that"

San smirked and added more to the story. "Apparently, at that time there a lot of milk. And we fight over one of many. To note it, I'm the one who choose it first"

"That last part would totally be you who selfishly added. I'm not that bad to stole something other already choose" Wooyoung deny it. San can't stop his smile. "You didn't remember. How can you sure of it? It did happen"

"Ha! That smile! It is you trying to play me!" Wooyoung know it. Then smirk come to his face. They know each other for ten years. San clearly understand that smile. They usually have the same smile of mischief.

Wooyoung's hand fast to stole San's milk. He grab it quite heavy that some of the milk flow out from the container. It fall into San pants. Shocked San looked at his pants and then at laughing Wooyoung.

"You said I fight over milk? Here I bring you milk fight version two!" Wooyoung takes a far spot and drink San milk. His milk at that time already finished. The empty carton is right next to San.

Looking at Wooyoung drinking his milk San shout "Ya! That's mine!"

"Don't you know? What yours is mine! But what mine is still mine!"

San didn't move. He didn't try to caught Wooyoung at all. At that time he think "Why did I fall in into you?".

"Not going to get your milk back?" He heard a taunt. San start to stand up. He takes the empty carton next to him and crush it. Running toward Wooyoung, he throw the carton toward Wooyoung. It nearly hit Wooyoung who avoid it by mere inches.

"Do not litter!" Shout Wooyoung.

"It yours. Throw it yourself"

They run after each other, fight and in the end back at the starting point. Both breathless due to sudden exercise.

"What happen after the two of fight? Like who win?" Wooyoung want to know.

"I don't know about that. My mother didn't tell me about it. Maybe you should as yours" Wooyoung makes mental note to ask about it later.

That day after come back from school Wooyoung asked his mother. "Owh. I thought you already forget what happen ten years ago. You don't even remember what happen five years ago when you're ten*

"San's mother told him about it and he told me. I'm curious. Who start the fight?"

"It is you who start the fight. San already take the carton and then you take it adter him"

*I'm not thay bad to stole someone else stuff!" Wooyoung protect himself. His mother smiled. "I got a heap of picture of that day. It is an album called WOOSAN"

Wooyoung's face show how he disbelive that revelation. And then turn shock when the so called album come in front of him. His mother also do service to flip it on the page.

"Then who won the fight? Me or San?"

"Of course it is my child who won. But you makes San cries and then the two of you share two carton of milk together" his mother explain.

Wooyoung flipped the pages and see the picture of the two of them shared the same carton of milk. With two straw.

San doesn't know since when he start having a crush on Wooyoung. When he realize he already have that feeling. He feel more than a friend but he try to keep himself at that threshold of friend.

Feeling sometimes comes in subtle way. His usually behavior might start change. His care might be different. And there time when he wish that Wooyoung might see. But there time he with he shouldn't know. He want to be more than friend but in the same time don't wish to destroy the status of friend.

Wooyoung is popular. San also popular. The two did not lack people who admire them. People who confess their love. San due to his crush on Wooyoung definitely reject the love confession. But why did Wooyoung did the same? It circle on San mind frequently.

"I did wonder. Why did you reject those cute little girl?" Asked San who got reply in question too. "How about you? Those so called cute little girl confess to you too"

"I'm asking about you"

"Is it just about me?" Asked Wooyoung. San didn't understand him at all.

Wooyoung looked at San who face clearly show he confused. Question mark can be seen appear on San face. Smile come to Wooyoung's lips.

Wooyoung's eyes didn't move from San when he remember something said by San before. "Let's be friend. Forever" He sigh.

"Gosh. I don't understand. Just answer my question. Why did you reject those cute girl?" San get back and stare at Wooyoung.

"Not my type!"

San once thought "Did they ever on the same line?" And that question also did appear on Wooyoung's mind.

"Just staying by his side is enough. I want to be by his side forever" San thought that. And wish for that too. That why he can keep his love secret. That his motivation.

There instance when he feel confessing his feeling. But he hold it on. Maybe it is not the time. And when time totally pass, he lost his chance forever.

It raining. Things sometimes turn bad when it raining. But no one actually know since it not usually happen. It is sometimes.

That sometimes happen on San life.

His ears ringing when he run out of his house without his shoes. Straight toward the main road where he hail a cab. Not like his family doesn't own a car. But he just too panic to remember that. And he think he need to be fast. That all because he just receive a call telling him that Wooyoung is in hospital and in critical condition.

When he arrived and literally flipped the emergency room, he meet Wooyoung's mother. She is wearing black hanbok and the realization hit San. He flopped to the ground. He still conscious but his soul is not with him.

Wooyoung's mother stay with him for some times until San's parents come by. By there they go to the funeral place. There San see the picture of Wooyoung with smile on his face. He break down and cried all he can.

He not family but he can be count as family. He wear all black and stand with Wooyoung's family. His eyes lifeless and there clearly sign of him crying and lack of sleep.

People greet him and he reply it. But it doesn't seem like he there. It is like his body take over his movement.

He is there on the last day they send Wooyoung off. Wooyoung's family even let him carry the picture. That day his body show near breaking out. He been losing lots of weight. And his legs movement looks dragged. Tears fall on his eyes. Just a few as most of it already gone over days of crying. He didn't replenish his water to allow him bawling.

He send Wooyoung and that day he gave him his hated flower ever. The white chrysanthemum. The normal flower to use during funeral. The flower who bring the meaning of grief and mourning.

The following days, the following weeks and the following month. Things isn't doing great for San. He have a lot of tendencies. The negative thought. The darkness who crawl to catch his feet.

His family scared. Wooyoung's family worried. One day among the usual days he is depressed, Wooyoung's mother comes to him.

She talked to him. Try to bring him back. She always thought that San is her son. Just like Wooyoung is. And she doesn't want her another son leave him too.

The one thing that makes San decide to change is "Wooyoung also won't like to see you like this. He would love for you to be happy. In his place. San, would you be happy for you and for Wooyoung too?"

He start to receive counseling. Taking care of his mental health. Making sure that he can be happy. Making sure he can leave his depressing self away.

It takes him one year to at least be able to function properly. And maybe wear a mask that show he is okay. He doesn't know anyway if it is real him or not. What he know, in his heart he still depressed. Grieving over the death of his best friend, his loved one, Wooyoung.

People can see him smiling and start to socialize. But deep inside sadness and regret of the loss still remain. "Will it be gone?" He asked himself. Since he asked himself, no one can answer it for him. They don't know he asked.

The same routine. The same schedule. What passed is the time. Day pass but the feeling still won't reside. As he brush his teeth, he looked at his reflection on the mirror. His eyes suddenly turn wide. Not because of his bed hair. Or the mark from bedsheet on his cheek. Or even the pimple on his forehead.

It is the slight mark on the left side of his collar bone that can be seen as tattoo. "What the hell?"

He try to relive the night before. But he remember he didn't drink to even got a tattoo. "Not like this is Vegas. It's Seoul. Does thing like this also happens in Seoul?"

At this phase the tattoo is still dim. He can't see what it is. He try to calm himself. This says "It just a bruise" Dirty thought come to him. "What the hell San! You never ever get into one day relationship. And remember again. You didn't drink last night!" He hit both of his cheek.

Days passed and San still see the same thing on his left collar bone. It didn't subside as his wish for. It just gotten more definite. One day, thought it still need time to properly formed, San know what it is. "Chrysanthemum..."

It is his most hated flower. It is the flower that he put on Wooyoung's. He remember the first time he see the flower. It is during Wooyoung's grandmother death.

Wooyoung is holding the flower and he himself holding one. The sight of Wooyoung is pretty on his eyes. "What does this flower mean?" He asked carelessly.

Wooyoung looked at San. "White chrysanthemum mean grief and mourning"

"Such a beautiful flower symbolizes sad meaning? Why?"

"We never know. Maybe you should ask someone who decide the language of flowers" Wooyoung come back.

"I don't even know the language of flowers. The creator of it is far fetched"

It takes weeks. More than a month for the tattoo of flower to become clear. The lines and color can be seen clearly. It is white chrysanthemum with yellow center. And even there is a stem in color of green. It really life like.

Yeosang looked at San left collar bone. He can see the tattoo of flower there. He did see it before when it still dim and see the progress of it turning into what it is now. A blooming flower.

"Gosh. If I didn't see it with my own eyes, I won't believe it"

"You see it grow and you give that reaction?" San feel like kicking the guy in front of him. He being his collar back to normal. Usual time the flower is hidden from eyes. Unless he decide to wear something low cut.

"It is a good thing. You don't need a tattoo. Girls dig someone inked"

"Owh. The why you won't?" San raise his eyebrows.

"Maybe in the future. So you want to remove or cover this one? White chrysanthemum is not a top tattoo to be owned but it still look nice"

"If it is other flower I might won't mind to keep it. But this flower..." The tone of San makes Yeosang notice the slight change on him. "Is it about Wooyoung?"

Yeosang know Wooyoung. And he is also friend with Wooyoung. He also close then San. The three of them are friend. But San and Wooyoung are closer to each other. Way than with others.

"It makes me remember him..." There slight pause. "Every time I see this on my reflection, I can't help to remember Wooyoung. It's hurting me. Yeosang, I'm hurting and this just makes me remember that I am hurt"

Silence engulfed the both of them. And then a sigh from Yeosang can be heard. "If you decide to remove or cover it, there one place I want to suggest. At first I thought it is weird for you to have a tattoo suddenly and think you might sleepwalk or anything and get a tattoo. So I search for a place that can make realistic flower tattoo"

"I don't need a flower tattoo to cover a flower tattoo"

"This place not only do flower tattoo. It just popular with flower tattoo. And like to post only about it in social media. What important the tattooist got medical license. She can tattoo you and even can remove a tattoo. Aren't that a nice place to go?"

San forehead knotted. "Just go there first. Book a time and then go" Yeosang said it. But San is not moving. "Let me do it" Yeosang takes out his phone and start to contact the place.

"I just send a message. Let's wait for reply" They waited for quite some times since it is still early. And then they receive a reply.

"When are you free? Today?"

"Isn't it too hasty?" San think getting a tattoo today is unbelievable. He is not ready tho he want the flower gone.

"Just go for first meeting. Show your tattoo and talk about what you want to have. You can always set another time to get the tattoo or remove it"

It is believable in San's eyes. He did want to remove or cover it. It it can't be removed, he need a design to cover the white chrysanthemum. "Let's do it today. I already book a time at 6 PM. The shop name is 'Flower Bloom on one's Skin'. I will forward you the location. When you arrive just state your name. I book using your name"

San already in the neighborhood when clock just 5 PM. He pass the tattoo shop a few times. But still he worried. He buy a drink and watch the place from a far. People would think like he is secretly watching the shop or try to do something. But far from it, he just too nervous.

He receive a call when it is 5:35 PM. No need to say it is from who. "Did you already go? Don't forget about your appointment!"

"I'm actually around that place" San didn't lie and told truthfully.

"Then why are you waiting for? Just go in? There lots more time. But it is better to come early. Or the place got customer?"

"No. I see the owner is quite free. Reading"

"Just go!" San distance the phone due to Yeosang high voice. He ended the call ad he didn't want to hear more nagging from Yeosang.

San wait for time to pass and try to get some courage. When there only three minutes left San moved and arrived on the front door. He open it and the sound of bell can be heard. He quickly looked up.

"Damn" he cursed inside. It is not like he sneaking in. But for his presence to be known kind of shock him. When he moved his eyes, he see her looking at him.

"Excuse me. I have an appointment at 6" his eyes directed to the clock for a second. Confirming his timely arrival.

"Ah. Yes. Choi San?" She asked. Also checking the clock. How she wonder of herself who didn't notice the track of time.

He nods hearing his name. She give a smile and says "Please get a seat" she point toward the black sofa. Without much thinking he did as she told.

Like usual she always go to the fridge first and ask "Drinks?"

"Anything would do" he answer. She see the nervousness in his voice. And decide to bring two can of soda. One for her and one for him.

She walk toward the sofa and put a can of soda on the table in front of him. She takes a seat and open her can.

"You know, you don't look like the picture" says Luna with slight laugh. San smiled. "It is my friend. He is the one who book an appointment for me"

"I see... Next time you meet him, told him I think he handsome" she laugh and he follow along. The tension start to subside.

"So, what should I do for you? First timer usually need some counseling or info about tattoo first. Or you already used to it and want dive into the action? Here I got a service of inking a new tattoo. Cover a tattoo that you dislike. Example, your ex name. And I also give service of removing tattoo"

"I want to remove or cover a tattoo" said San. This kind of talk process is not stranger to Luna. It is mostly used for someone like her.

"Oh. You're not new into this" she nodded and San quickly shake his head. "No. I'm totally new at this tattoo stuff. Even need my friend to recommend me"

"Okay. Then you want to know between removing or covering is better, right?" Luna notice the slight hint of him.

San nodded and Luna start to explain. "There pro and con of both choice. Removing a tattoo can give a clean finish. But it also cause a scarring and sometimes discoloration of your skin. While covering, since we need to cover the original tattoo with another one. There a need a darker color to properly cover it up. And it might get bigger than the previous tattoo"

"What would you suggest?" San ask and Luna give a clear answer. "How about you let me check your tattoo first?"

San nodded and bring down the collar of his tee. On his left collar bone Luna can see a white chrysanthemum blooming. "Nice flower. Would you mind if I takes a picture?"

"You may" San give consent. Luna headed toward counter and takes two cameras. One a Polaroid and another one is a professional one. She come back and start taking a picture.

First she use the Polaroid and takes one picture. Then she taken the professional camera and takes a few picture of the flower. She put both camera on the table. Then remember she forgot to takes Jungkook's flower last night.

"Where did you get your tattoo? How about the pigment?" She start asking like assessing which way is better.

"I..." San is in bind. He wonder if he should told it magically appear on his skin. He would think he crazy if he ever heard this. And the girl in front of him will think the same too. Added to the fact he know nothing about tattoo.

He is in dilemma and silence engulfing the whole space. As he try to form a right setences so that he didn't seem crazy he heard she says "It magically appear" and can't help to nods and says "Yes. It magically appear"

Shocked at what he said he looked toward her who smiling. Her eyes is on him. Like assessing him. "Don't think that you're crazy. Your flower magically appear one day. Slowly but soon turn like what it is right now"

San looked at her like she is crazy. "Gosh. I got that looks frequently" she says and San quickly change the way he looked at her.

"Believe or not. I've been tattooing for more than a year. And I see that rare occurrence a lot of time. Do you wish to listen more about it?" She asked and San nods. Thus bring her to explain the whole thing about the flower.

After she finish explaining and San digest everything, he says. "So, this flower bloom from my sincere feeling? And the placement and color always bring a meaning of something"

"Yes. What your story? Do you have anyone who you admire? Adore? Want to protect or any kind of feeling?"

"Grief and regret" he said and his head which hanging low rise to looks at her. "And he is dead. From what you said, the flower supposed to bloom for someone living. And gone when someone died. But mine bloom for him who dead"

Her eyes show like she found something interesting. "Hmm..." She looked right on him. "Something like this never happen. Well... The research never complete. There lots of thing to filled. And maybe you're just anomaly"

Her eyes makes San back off and his back stop by the sofa. "There a research about this? Did you did it?"

"Not mine. It is my mentor" she stand up and walk toward the door to flip the open board to closed. She also lock the door.

"I don't think you would believe me hundred percent. Let's go to second floor" she said and walked toward the staircase. He follow her. Wondering why she want to change space. And when he on one of the room on second floor he understands.

"Those are the flower from people that once participate in a research and also people who come here with the same reason as you" at that time she write something on Polaroid she taken of San abd then pin it on the wall.

San looks around. There not many. But it is quite a lot of people that makes her words credible enough. "All of their flowers bloom for someone they have special feeling off. And all gone when their love gone or the person dies. Only yours come to manifest after your special person died"

She looked at San who watched the picture. His eyes stopped at the bundled picture with the same flower. The way it arranged show that it might comes from the same person. And his thought is cleared by her. "That's mine. A spider lily"

Disbelive is in San eyes as he looked at her. "Don't ask to see it live. All of that flower is gone. Right now I don't bloom any flower at all" She show the back of her neck. And he see it empty not like one of the picture.

"Then when you mean it will be gone, it will"

"Yes. The red spider lily on the back of my neck bloom for my mentor. She is the one who did the research about this matter" she explain. San can't help to ask "Does that mean she died?"

Luna nods. "Yes. Years ago. And I decide to continue her research. Becoming a tattooist is the best choice to do my research. Because most people are just like you. They would try to hide it. Lots of the flower hidden and thus harden the research"

"In your thoughts I shouldn't remove or cover this flower" he stated.

"You can't remove it. It bloom on your skin. It won't be removed. It can be covered. But it is better if you don't. One day it will rot and disappear anyway" she explain it.

"But mine didn't follow the rule that already established"

"Your anomaly. That one" she point toward San's left collar bone. "I think will be gone when you let him go from your heart. It bloom from your feeling of grief and regret. One day when you don't feel it anymore, it will gone"

"It will rot first, right? What if I see it rotten and start to feel the feeling of grief and regret again?"

"Isn't it better? That mean you can be forever remember him. For me, I did wish for the flower to stay intact. Especially my red spider lily. But it gone. The only way to remember is the picture"

San leave the shop and before he leave she said "Give it some thoughts. If you want to keep it or not. If you did want to cover it up, you can call me and make an appointment. I also don't mind if you want to come for mere talk"

He walked away from the shop and thinks "A flower that will last as long as I still feel grief and regret toward you. Should I keep it or not? If I did, it will be forever. I think I won't be able to forget you as long as I live. Is it the way for you to stay by my side for forever? Like I always hoped for"

Notes - Wrote this slightly after got the request but just now got to upload it. I'm sinned.