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Seven-year-old Irene was a tiny Irene. Even she knew that much.  So, when her Elementary school's sixth-grade bully decided that she was next on his hit list, she could feel her blood run cold. Irene didn't know what she did wrong to deserve his attention. She was quiet, calm, and kept to herself during the first grade's outside playtime. To anyone else, Irene was practically invisible, but to him, there was a bright her target constantly marking her up. 

For over a week he had been teasing her, pulling her hair in all different directions, tripping her in the middle of the hall, one time going as far as pushing her into one of the tiny cubbies she kept her stuff in. Irene was terrified of him, but she managed to find routes to avoid him on the days that she knew his schedule.

On one of the days that Irene thought she was safe, sitting at the corner of the field just enjoying the breeze, she heard his laugh coming from somewhere behind her. Slowly turning around, she was met with the sight of her bully. He was twice her height, arguably more than three times her weight, and most importantly he has friends with him that looked exactly like him. 

She recognized them, they had been there the other times he had bullied her. Fearing another beat down, Irene took off, little legs flying down the field in search of any teacher that could help her avoid a painful fate. She could hear him and his friends behind her, calling out her name chanting the same thing they always did.

"Run Irene run. You're never gonna be fast enough."

In the end, they were right, Irene wasn't fast enough and went home that day with a bruise under her ribs. 

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The bullying lasted for most of her elementary and middle school years. It was only in high school, when she came back after summer looking like a woman and not an awkward teenager, did the bullying stop. Her hair had grown longer, her body thinned out. Irene was the goddess of freshman year. After years of people making fun of her, she was glad that she could close that chapter in her life, or so she thought. 

Halfway through high school, Irene got her first boyfriend. He was nice, handsome, caring, anything and everything that a girl could ask for. At first, Irene was hesitant with him. Many boys had tried to go out with her, only for them to turn around and ask her to do things that she doesn't even want to repeat out loud. However, this guy was different. Even if Irene was slow and stiff at first, he was patient and genuine with her. After a month or so of courting, she finally agreed to be his girlfriend. 

Their relationship was a fairytale. For six months, Irene felt like she was in heaven. He only kissed her when she was comfortable and didn't pressure her into anything she didn't want to do.

That changed Halloween of Junior year.

They had gone out to a party hosted by one of the other football players on her boyfriend's team and Irene was not pleased. He had said it was going to be a small get together, but when they got there, the house was shaking with the bass of the music and the smell of alcohol could be inhaled from a mile away. Nevertheless, to make her partner happy, she walked through the front door. 

An hour or so later, her boyfriend was drunk out of his mind. Irene had never seen him like this and she didn't know what to make of it. Deciding she needed some air, she excused herself and went outside. Standing on the corner of the lawn, the music slightly dulled from the distance, Irene felt safe. She could breathe. 

Suddenly, Irene felt a rough hand on her shoulder grab her and turn her around. Her boyfriend pulled her flush against him, and she could smell the vodka on his breath. He kept muttering something about how pretty she was but Irene could only hear the blood and panic rising from deep within her. She felt cornered. 

As he went to kiss her, an act Irene was not okay with, she started thrashing in his grip. She needed to leave. His grip tightened around her waist, fingers painfully digging into her skin, and leaned in to try and kiss her again. FInally using her voice, Irene screamed in his face, startling him enough to let go of her. Quickly, she scurried a safe distance away from him, massaging the spots where his hands had been. His snarl was menacing as he pushed her hard.

"You keep dodging away from me and I'm ing sick of it. All I wanted was the anyway, so run Irene run if I truly wanted you wouldn't be fast enough."

Irene ran home that night, broken-hearted with bruises on her hips. 

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After that failed relationship, Irene ran from any and every person that approached her. Her ex had tried to contact her, cornering her in the hallway on more than one occasion with the same violent grip on her waist, whispering sweet poison in her ear.

She finished high school with her friend Seulgi by her side and never turned back. 

Her university years were relatively calm. The urge to bolt from everyone new to her was always there, but she learned to ignore the ghosts that haunted her. She focused on her studies, her close friends Sooyoung, Seulgi, and new addition Yeri, and finding out who she was.

Who she was, turned out to be not as straight as she thought she was. 

It started in her senior year of University when a pretty girl had been assigned to be Irene's lab partner.  They talked often and even started going out after a couple of weeks of getting to know each other. The panic in her chest was there and it was unbearable. When they held hands, it felt as if they were burning her. When they kissed, she felt like a stone was stuck in her chest. 

The worrying got to the point where it was affecting her even on her breaks. 

It was Thanksgiving and she was sitting at the lunch table with her relatives enjoying the food and atmosphere.  Everyone had begun settling down into a calm conversation when the dreaded topic of relationships popped. Being the oldest in her family, Irene knew she was first to be questioned. Her mom tried to subtly weave it into their conversation, but Irene knew she wanted a solid answer. She cleared , feeling her neck starting to heat up.

"Well, I have kinda been seeing someone." Irene stuttered out. "She's nice..." she trailed off, gauging her family's reactions. 

No one seemed to react to it as she looked at their faces until she reached her dad's. His eyes held fiery anger in them, like what she just said insulted his entire being, to a certain degree it did. His face contorted into a scowl and he stood up, towering over her. Insult after insult leaving his lips and landing on her, dousing her in lighter fluid, waiting for the lowest blow to finally strike the match that burns Irene down. 

The match comes in the form of her father's screaming.

"Get out. Run Irene. Run before I kick you out of this house and out of this family."

So Irene ran, tears streaming down her cheeks. Hours later, her dad called to apologize for the way he reacted and Irene forgave him. No matter the apology, the damage had already been done. She went home with a bruised heart, one she feared, that would never heal.

Irene was getting so tired of running. 

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After graduation, she quickly found herself in a world-renown marine biology lab. Far away from anything she had ever known. Constant isolation and avoidance of going out left her in some of her darkest times, so she left. Running from anything that reminded her of the hurt. Well, almost anything. Seulgi, Sooyoung, and Yerim would never let her go alone. She was thankful for that.

As more time passed, she felt it easier to breathe again. Not really, but she tried to tell herself it was getting better. There were still nightmares The cinder block placed over her chest lifted, if only an inch, and allowed her to enjoy the scientific experiments and trials that she dreamed of doing all of her college years. 

For much of the time at the lab, the trials she did were solo endeavours. Small little projects, that mostly focused on certain marine species that had a high tendency to flee. How fitting. As she was nearing a breakthrough In identifying a new pattern, her supervisors assigned her to a new project. A partner project. Irene felt the panic well up all over again as she approached her new partner from behind but before she could dwell on the fear, the woman turned to her, offering a small smile.

"Hi, I'm Wendy. Wendy son."

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The two worked together in harmony. Irene had never felt it so easy to co-exist with anyone before. When she needed something for their project, Wendy was already giving it to her. No need to ask. Wendy's kindness and warmth encased Irene in a cocoon of calm every time their eyes met, a smile never leaving either of their faces. Occasionally, Wendy would crack a joke that made Irene's face turn sour, only for it to break out into a beaming smile seconds later, as Wendy's laughter filled her ears. 

After work, Wendy would always ask Irene to get food, and as they shared stories in one of their many favorite dinner spots, Irene felt a tug at her heartstrings. She didn't know what it was, but she dreaded coming to a realization.

Most of their hours were early in the morning, requiring Irene to wake up just as the first rays of sunshine started peeking over the horizon. Her apartment was located on Wendy's route to the lab, so the shorter blonde always waited for her in front of her building. They never talked much at these hours. Sleep still heavy in their voices as they whispered their greetings. Irene loved this about Wendy, she was never loud and pushy. After three months of working together, they were able to walk in comfortable silence, the only thing making sounds was the slight breeze that ruffled through Autumn leaves and Wendy's hair. Brushing it back enough for Irene to glance over and catch the morning glow that bounced off of her lab partner's sleepy face. Big brown eyes still puffy from the early wake-up, glowing a brilliant golden color as she glanced back at Irene. 

Suddenly, Irene felt it. The familiar tug in her chest. The feeling that had hurt her so many times before. She hadn't realized it, but now she did, it's full effects now starting to paralyze her as they walked. She was falling in love. 

Afraid. That's how she felt. Memory by memory, all the fear started stacking up in her head, stopping her in her tracks. Breathe. She couldn't breathe. The years of running catching up to her as Irene struggled to keep her head above the murky water of panic. Her subconscious mind was slipping, falling,  deeper into the despair of her trauma and hurt. 

Irene watched as the female scientist slowly began turning towards her, a concerned look on her face. Each inch that she turned, increased the tight grip that fear had over her body, bruising her from the inside. Irene needed to run again, Wendy couldn't see her like this. She needed-

A small hand intertwined with hers. Wendy interlaced their fingers as she drew small shapes on the surface of her with her thumb. The hurricane of feelings dwindled to only a small rain cloud. As her cloudy vision cleared, she was met with mellow eyes full of affection gazing at her. 

"It's okay Irene, you don't need to run from me."

Maybe she didn't need to run.

Wendy tugged at her hand, bringing her closer to her. Under the morning glow and rustling leaves, Irene felt herself relaxing in the woman's embrace. The ambiance of the surrounding area added to the overwhelming surge of happiness that she felt. Wendy didn't know, she couldn't possibly know, what she had done for Irene at that moment, couldn't realize that she had single-handedly dispelled years of trauma with one embrace. Irene knew that this serenity wouldn't last, but as long as Wendy would be there, she would be able to manage. 

Pulling back from their hug, she glanced at amber eyes, hidden under eyelashes, and rosy lips, slightly chapped from the cool air. Irene felt it, the bubble of emotions welling up as she leaned into Wendy. The bubble exploded. Washing over her in every aspect. Irene dove under the swell of the wave that was Wendy Son and hoped to come up on the other side. Pillowy lips melting together, painting a picture more beautiful than the sky changing color above them. Wendy kissed her back gently. Running her hands over previously bruised hips, up to healed ribs, grazing over a beating heart, and finally stopping as they wrapped around Irene's neck, playing with the baby hairs on her nape. 

Irene hated running. Hated the constant panic. Hated the want, no the need, to run away. She had always run to a place she thought was home, battered, and bruised from the battles that she had gone through. 

Now, she didn't have to run. 

She was done running.

As she felt Wendy press her warm body closer against her, her head tilting slightly to deepen the kiss, she felt safe. In the arms of her lab partner, her new lover, the one that held her delicately as they swayed, she allowed herself to let go. 

She was home.

Irene was tired of running, but if it meant getting to this exact moment all over again, she would run however long it took to get to Wendy. 

To get home.

That night she walked to Wendy's apartment, healing the bruises and scars with every kiss, touch, and glance. 

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To be quite honest with you, I don't know what the heck this is. 

Hope you enjoyed it!

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@ Wenrenehye and @ jeongrene

-Beardoodlezʕ•ᴥ•ʔ