001 -
12:07 EST, somewhere along the sea

i think that the first time i saw him was in this weird cruise my father forcibly took me. now that i think about it, i'm not sure if it was even a cruise, i suddenly remember the banner that hanged around the old yacht saying 'annual 13th fishing competition.' yeah, my mind was clearer now, my father was fascinated by fishing, he had worn his moss green fishing vest, with his wrinkled fishing hat, with his fishing equipment, and fishing boots, and fishing…fishing… 

"fishing!"

my heart pounded, the weak and excited squeak of a child played in my ears. "that's right", i thought to myself, "that was the first time i saw him." 

a child, around my age at that time. we were so similar, yet different. he had these weird tubes connected to his body, and that body of his linked to a heavy-looking metal backpack that made distrubing noises as if it were pumping gas. without noticing, i was sternly staring. my father gave me a few pats in the head to stop looking, but i didn't stop. the kid met his eyes with mine. my heart clenched for a bit. what's a kid around my age doing with such thing on his body?

"hi," the boy walked closer to me, their parents watching from afar. his machine made a louder noise now that our distance was closer. i didn't reply. i didn't want to reply to such a foreign kid. 

"my name is jimin, what's yours?" his voice was getting faint, as it overlapped with the pumps of the machine. i didn't reply again.

"i'm 12."
pump

"you?"
pump

"do you like fishing?"
pump

"…do you like the sea?"
pump

"perhaps, are you sca-"

"freak."

002 -
17:13 EST, hospital room A-4

jimin let out a silent giggle.

"what's so funny? let me know the joke too," i said, my elbows resting on my knees, as i crouchily looked at him. jimin had a slight red around his cheeks, i didn't know if it was out of laugh or fever. 

"do you remember when we first met?" he said, his lips quivering, trying to hide the hugest grin he wanted to display. i rolled my eyes, it was a memory i wanted to forget, yet couldn't help but to be recalled every now and then. 

"the freak incident? yes i do."
"and then you desperately searched for me, in order to apologize."
"yeah, i know."
"and when you found me, you were bawling."
"i wasn't."
"yes you were."

jimin gave up, he grinned widely, showing his teeth and curving lips, "and you said 'please be my friend'." 

maybe because it was noon, and the sun was just setting, and because we left the room's window ajar, and the breeze was so tender today, and maybe because the sunlight perfectly aligned around jimin's silhoutte, for a moment, i really thought there were wings on his back.

"yeah, and you told me, 'okay, because life is an orange'." 

003 -
16:05, school backyard

i kicked the ball a little too harshly.

"taehyung!" hoseok complained, "now i have to get it." i just lowered my head and waved my hand. school had finished five minutes ago, but i decided to play a bit with my hoseok and namjoon. 

"you don't seem to be in a hurry today either," namjoon muttered, his head askew, full of wonder and curiosity, "you aren't going to visit that, uh-hmm…" "jimin?" "yeah, jimin!" namjoon contently repeated. it's true, i used to go straight to the hospital after school in order to be with jimin, but it has been around a month since i last visited. 

"i'm not going anymore," i couldn't raise my head, i was suddenly too scared to face up. since when did i keep my eyes stuck on the ground? since when did i become so nervous about everything? "taehyung? all good?"

"guys!" hoseok hastily ran towards us, "i got the ball, taehyung, your pass!" he enthusiastically kicked the ball, but i didn't even try to get it. i didn't move an inch from where i was before. "taehyung! i just picked up the ball!"

"hey," i asserted with clammy hands, "did you know that life is an orange?" 

"what?"
"huh?"

i raised my head completely, with tight fists and a fired gaze, i looked at their perplexed faces, "life is an orange!!"

"what does that even mean?" 

and it suddenly took me back in the cruise, when i first met jimin: i didn't reply.
but just turned around and walked with heavy steps, "let's go home, i'm not in the mood to play."

004 -
23:54 EST, ICU ˚2

he looked pathetic. jimin looked pathetic, the tubes that he had when once a child, doubled and tripled. his backpack-like machine turned into 5 chunks of huge machinery with even weirder buttons and even much disturbing noises. jimin couldn't properly move even, or speak. he just blinked. a lot of times.

i stood there next to him. it had been 4 years since i last visited. i became taller than the hospital beds. my finger was now completed with a ring, i was expecting a child, i just got promoted in my job, hoseok got married, namjoon became a professor…and jimin was like always. just laying on bed with a machine that his life depended on. he hadn't changed. it was pathetic, but mostly miserable.

my heart ached to see him like that, the always cheery and smiling jimin stale on bed, decaying by minute. lifeless, just a blinking corpse. he no longer was jimin, i did not recognize that boy. 

his heartbeat went quiet by each second. the heart monitor rang unsteadily. he was laying on his deathbed.
"hey, back then, what did you mean?" 

jimin's pupils rotated towards me. his eyes were no longer shining. his plump lips dried out. 

"what?" a hoarse voice, it was like seeing him die faster the more he kept talking.

"life is an orange," i crouched to meet his eyes, i no longer needed a stool, "what did you mean?"

jimin curved a really, barely visible smile. his skin was white and his cheeks were purple, but i could imagine myself jimin saying, 'you still remember that?'

"i lived my whole life with that phrase in my heart…" my stomach hit a pang and my throat knotted, if i were too speak, it would untie, and i'd probably cry streams of tears. 

jimin seemed to take a deep breath, the inhaler fogged, his gaze was hazy. tons of cables, tubes, machines, computers, noises, pumps, and beeps were between us, but they seemed to disappear for a few seconds.

"i was born weak," jimin started to talk really slowly, on his own pace, "i had little to live, so i'd always cry in fear as a child, because everyday i was closer to death. i had to use weird things just to breathe, and then to make my heart beat, and so on. i knew my life wasn't normal, and i'd sorrow everyday and pity myself. but then one day, my dad came to me, and with the sweetest voice possible he said, 'its okay jimin, because life is an orange'."

my hands clenched, i decided to unravel the knot on my throat, as my heart pulled my strings and tears just kept flowing down my cheeks, 
"what do you mean? what does the orange even mean?"

jimin closed his eyes, he knew it was the end. his end had finally shown upon his eyes. but he was brave. jimin may had lived a pathetic life, but he faced it with courage. his infamous grin was lastly shown to me, he really wasted his last breath just to answer me

 

"what are you talking about? an orange…is just an orange."