** I apologise in advance to the people that are like me and re-read the previous chapter before the new update because if you do you’re going to have quite a looooooong sit. So I advise you to maybe not start reading this right before going to sleep ;) 

Enjoy~ **

 

 

 

 

After almost two days spent, for the most part, staring blankly ahead for ridiculously long stretches at a time —much longer than what would probably be considered normal for any sane person—, Joohyun can somewhat confidently say that the happenings of Saturday and everything about a certain bright-eyed brunette are not constantly replaying in her mind and taking up all of her thoughts and time anymore. Though it takes considerable effort.

 

Since walking away from Seungwan and practically skipping to her car, beaming and grinning like a fool after making sure she was completely out of sight, it’s been hard to focus on what she was supposed to be doing. Truthfully, she barely got anything done at all the rest of her weekend, way too preoccupied with her running thoughts and images of Seungwan and their conversations and banter. Part of her brain was also solely dedicated to carefully assembling a mental catalogue of all her different smiles and expressions. From the nice, gentle smile that kind of —totally— makes her swoon, the ghost soft one that she doesn’t hide as wells as she thinks she does and pulls the corners of her lips upwards ever so slightly and a cute, bashful smile that is too adorable for words all the way to the alluring way her beautiful deep brown eyes shine when she thinks she’s being slick or the growing slow smile that’s this close to a smirk. 

 

It’s all she could think about, playing on an endless loop in her mind for hours while she let the accompanying warmth map out on her skin. It’s a sensation she’s quickly taking a liking to. Somewhere in the back of her mind she almost expects her brain to hurt from thinking about her so much but she can’t find it in herself to try to stop it or even care about how mesmerised she is by Seungwan. Even at the mere fleeting thought of her Joohyun her stomach flips and her mind goes a little hazy, making her think that maybe, just maybe she should get some type of grip on it. 

 

Or at least try.

 

After many, many hours of replaying and revelling in her newfound feelings, she has come to admit to herself once again, very softly but verbally this time, that she is quite smitten by her. She really likes her. Much more than she expected to. 

 

More often than she could count (or would admit to) her mind has wandered back to every detail of that unanticipated but nonetheless amazing sequence of events at the end of their date which she for the life of her wouldn’t have predicted. How Seungwan, looking so astute and very cute with her glasses and with a nervousness that mirrored her own, hesitantly stepped closer and bridged the gap between them to carefully snake her arms around her and engulfed her in a warm hug. It surprised her a little just how natural if felt and how easy it was to relax and melt into the other woman her soft and inviting embrace despite it being the first time being that physically close to each other. Everything else around her briefly disappeared and all she could feel was Seungwan. But she was also acutely aware of her heartbeat speeding up almost instantly, skipping a beat (or several), and shivers running up her spine, her face going a little red too. 

 

It wasn’t exactly like their whole bodies were pressed together but it was enough to let her know that Seungwan most definitely fits right into her arms, or the other way around. Very soft and snug, fitting together almost seamlessly, like they’ve done this so many times before and she didn’t really want to leave. Which in all honesty she didn’t. It felt inexplicably right. And that small fact now sits nicely in the back of her mind, making a home for itself amongst many others.

 

Then just a minute after and fully by her own accord she made a split second decision on a gut feeling and an inability to not give in to the temptation, encouraged by the way she smiled shyly at her. Without thinking and driven by an overwhelming amount of feelings bubbling up and a sudden burst of confidence that surprised even herself, she spontaneously kissed Seungwan on the cheek, almost like a subconscious promise or reassurance. It’s the boldest things she’s done to date by far, and to a date, but she simply followed what her heart told her to do which was going after what she wants. At least take the first step. There’s just something about Seungwan that makes her want to be bold and brave. 

 

Despite the crystal clear picture imprinted on her retina and the memory of every single second that’s now irreversibly etched into her brain she still pinches herself because she does not quite believe it really happened. Even though the phantom of the touch and tingles that still linger on her lips at the memory should be proof enough. 

 

She vividly remembers how she could feel her heartbeat inside her chest, throat, ears, stomach, everywhere and forgetting how to breath for a second when she leant forward. Eyes trained on Seungwan her mesmerising brown ones, impossibly drawn into the depth of them, and their faces slowly getting close enough touch, soft breaths almost felt on her own skin. All the nerve cells in her body were on edge when Seungwan didn’t move away, the air noticeably charged between them. It felt as if the world stopped for the briefest moment whilst she decidedly tried not to think about the fact that she’d love to find out exactly how those perfect lips would feel on her own and she instead willed herself to finally move and softly plant her lips on the other’s cheek, eyes immediately fluttering shut when she made contact, light but so sure. She remembers the cheek burning to the touch, like her skin was on fire just as much as hers was, and absentmindedly (too distracted by the sensation and tiny sparks going through her) she registered and confirmed the softness of the woman’s round cheeks in that moment, which she had caught herself imagining quite a few times already. 

 

All of it wasn’t nearly enough to satisfy her curiosity.

 

And in hindsight she has no other explanation than to guess that her natural tendency to quietly observe others and soak up information came to good use and cultivated into something vaguely akin to suave or seduction in the moments directly after. She broke away from the kiss, already regretting it as soon as she did, and moved back teasingly slow to meet Seungwan her wide eyes once there was just barely enough space between them, still hovering distractingly close and speaking softy into the small space between them. She did not mind their proximity at all. Welcomed it in fact and instantly wanted much more of it, and she did not intend for her voice to come out exactly as it did but seeing Seungwan her expression she was not about to complain or feel flustered and only smiled, letting the blush spread on her cheeks. They were without a doubt the furthest things on her mind. 

 

Oh, the way Seungwan looked lovely right then, looking at her like that. Gleaming eyes looking at her intently, a deepening blush dusting her cheeks and her lips slightly parted, looking completely stunned and perhaps a bit impressed, sparked a lot of hope within her and it was all the feedback she could ever need. Later, she also didn’t miss the unmistakable feeling of a pair of eyes on her, following her every move, and she couldn’t help but grin to herself, thrilled by the idea. Her chest still lurches when she thinks about it. 

 

After she calmed down a bit in the safety of her own car —maybe even more so now after going over it uncountable times— she felt incredibly proud of herself that she kept it together just long enough not to break the tension between them and the almost fragile magic surrounding the moment. 

 

She knows with absolute certainty that she never would have done that with anybody else. Hasn’t and never actually wanted to previously. But with Seungwan she feels different than she ever has before, at ease and infinitely better and she feels more of everything, somehow. Like she’s more present in her skin, aware of her own body. There are a lot of firsts she’s discovering as well and it would be unfair to make a comparison between Seungwan and other people. To even attempt such a thing just seems outrageously ridiculous to her. 

 

She’s simply unparalleled.

 

Seungwan makes her feel good and is captivating, ambitious, quick-witted, and overall just a very warm-hearted, bubbly person. Throw in a sense of humour too and not to mention that she’s very attractive and they talk and banter so very easily, making it feel like only 30 minutes have passed while in reality they’ve been talking for hours already. And well… they flirt too and it’s not nearly as intimidating or difficult as Joohyun could have ever expected. It’s a gentle, natural push and pull between them that’s almost as easy as breathing and she cannot even begin to comprehend how that is possible.

 

There’s something about her, or rather everything.

 

She hasn’t enjoyed being around someone this much since… maybe since never. Not like this nor to this extend.

 

It feels a little insane that it can be this easy. 

 

It is this easy. 

 

Especially because Joohyun had almost convinced herself that ‘comfortable’, ‘enjoyable' and ‘dating’ were completely separate things for her or that she was somehow doing it wrong or asking too much. 

 

In high school she didn’t understand what made all the other girls gush about the boys and act the way they did; walking around with their heads in the cloud, all high-pitched giggling at the lamest jokes, twirling their hair, seeking out their company and blushing colourfully when they playfully pushed their shoulder a little. Occasionally also condoning certain behaviour from them and justifying it as ‘that’s how they show they like you’. At some point she somehow got roped into their conversations and she patiently listened to her friends whilst confusedly trying to relate to the things they said and not having anything comparable to share of her own. 

 

Being shy to begin with, sure, she also got nervous around the boys but just very differently. Not in the good and excited, anticipatory way they described to her but more in apprehension and discomfort, with her stomach in unpleasant knots when some of them would suddenly step too far into her space without any preamble. She also wanted nothing more than to wiggle out from under their inquisitive, lingering stares and run away from unwanted compliments but in reality she often settled for a slightly awkward nod and a shyly muttered thanks in the end, not knowing what else to do. 

 

She found herself confused by the difference but not too invested to get to the bottom of what she was seemingly ‘missing’. Rather, she wanted to prioritise school and kept to herself quite a lot, but despite this she was still a well-known, or at least recognised, figure in school. With the years she grew a bit more wary and shied away from the increasing attention she got when they all grew up and matured. Through trial and error she eventually learned how she could quickly but still politely refuse their advances and get back to focusing on whatever she was doing that the (often random) person thought they could just interrupt to strike up a conversation with her. It kind of stung in a way and thoroughly annoyed her that it was always solely her appearance that drove them to approach her and why they wanted to ‘get to know her’ in the first place, instead of literally any other reason imaginable. They didn’t even try to hide it, too. She’s multifaceted like the rest of them, why couldn’t it ever be something else? 

 

She finished high school without ever going out with or being kissed by anyone —not that she entertained the idea in the first place—, reasoning that it just wasn’t for her when people asked and thinking she just might not work that way. Instead much preferring and gravitating towards the pleasant company of her female classmates with way prettier, comforting wide smiles, who smelled like flowers and understood her and her boundaries a lot better. 

 

Much of attending University in Seoul was (unfortunately) a similar experience, though this time some of the guys were more persistent, rowdy and arrogant or plain rude as they openly looked at her or approached her with an almost predatory, lecherous look that made her wince and her skin crawl. It’s safe to say she was not flattered by their constant unwanted attention and she tried to avoid them or ignore them, kept doing her own thing, but if she did run into one of them (or got cornered) then after only a few seconds of listening she already gathered that she didn’t fit into the idea of her that they created in their minds. 

 

Not least of all because things also finally (eventually) started to make a little more sense for herself as she found herself openly looking at the other women walking around on campus more and more often. Admiring all the cool unnies or dongsaengs around her and thinking about how beautiful they were, how she likes their style and wondering what it would be like to spend time with just them and also to kiss them, run her fingertips freely over smooth skin and lie side by side. 

 

Truthfully, deep down, it wasn’t as shocking or earth-shattering a revelation to come to the conclusion that she liked women and not men. Not really. There were little clues and moments spread throughout the years in high school already that elicited a fleeting, vague idea, however she didn’t yet have a name for it back then. She also never paid that much attention to it until she was exposed to a more diverse and open environment at Uni but still, somewhere she always knew. It only became clearer with the years, the thoughts more frequent and the difference with the people around her more apparent. The feelings grew bigger and louder, expanding beyond her ability to control and to the point that she absolutely couldn’t push it back anymore. She couldn’t get around it and had no willpower left other than to be brutally honest with herself. 

 

Eventually it was both a huge relief to give a name to what she was or wasn’t feeling or experiencing before, to admit it, but also scary and she took some time to learn the ropes of slow, gentle acceptance of herself and growing fully into her own skin, understanding herself deeply and going through the stages years later than her same-aged friends. True sincerity can be scary and she needed that time to process stuff at her own pace. 

 

Because knowing and acting on it are two very different things. Sometimes it’s hard to go after what you want. The crystal clear straight path ahead that’s the focus of everyone else around her and what people assume and ‘know’ that’s good for her was just the path of least resistance to her. Something she would be capable of if she really tried hard enough while the small winding road branching off to the side, in all its intimidating, terrifying foggy glory, caught her eye for the longest time—or was at least always a solid possibility somewhere in her mind—. That one is uncertain, uncharted and for her to still largely shape when finding or stubbornly making her way through. Nonetheless, she believes it’s the better-life path for her, that it is true to herself and so much more worth it and right than the, perhaps, easy but ultimately unfulfilling choice.

 

She likes to believe she’s come a long way and that it made her stronger.

 

Since then, and only once she truly felt ready enough, she has gone on a couple dates that were of varying levels of success —the term used in a somewhat loose sense— and had her first, half-tipsy kiss with a woman at some house party she wasn’t able to talk herself out of attending after refusing to tag along to anything similar for the better part of 3 years despite her roommates’ continuous nagging. That kiss was nice enough, no fireworks going off behind closed eyelids or anything close to it but nonetheless enjoyable. And even though she didn’t need it, it was also a kind of validation, not for anyone else but for herself. 

 

But she also couldn’t help but think, in a distant sort of way, that the other's lips were a tad bit too cold against her own for her liking, her hands too unfamiliar and impatient and pushy as the woman held the back of her head, tugging her closer all too fast and controlling, wanting more, almost demanding in a way, something she wasn’t willing to give. A different kiss, after Uni and sober, was definitely better and nicer but still somehow a little off in a way that she could describe with less clarity. Nothing made her feel anything really discernible. The dates were relatively okay, too. Some of them straight up made it uncomfortable and awkward for her while others were slightly better in their attempts at drawing her out of her shell and making her feel somewhat comfortable enough to start to enjoy their company. 

 

Still, she didn’t quite get the hype of it all. It never felt quite right, not the way others claim that it is supposed to feel. For some reason she initially thought it would come with time, that it was her own doing, perhaps her own inexperience and insecurity or shyness that was hindering her and she’d just have to give them another try, that it would come with a second or third date. That it would take some time to warm up to them. However, going through the motions didn’t work at all. It felt too calculated and thus has always ended the same, namely with her deciding it was better to part ways, not believing in making concessions that soon or forcing feelings into existence and lying to herself and the other person when she knows it wasn’t right. She knows her worth and has enough self-respect not to do that to herself (and others too of course). 

 

Also she was —and still is— not in any rush. She’s absolutely fine, great even, by herself too. Perfectly. 

 

Okay, most of the time if she’s being honest with herself. There are the occasional days or moments when it feels different. Surely everyone has those and that’s okay, she reminds herself. 

 

But as opposed to some other people, she’s not one for endlessly trying and searching for it but is more of the idea that she is being herself and that she will see what the future brings. It will presumably come some day. Though some members of her family do not agree with that sentiment and continue to hold her to exhausting voiced and unvoiced expectations. 

 

So in the past Joohyun couldn’t get that little voice and nagging feeling at the back of her mind to go away, telling her that it wasn’t how it’s supposed to be. How she wishes and wants to feel. And well… it’s been quite an extraordinary 180 degree change to arrive at her current situation, she has realised with wonder. Like something has awakened within her that she didn’t know was there or even possible.

 

Up until Seungwan she never experienced what she currently going through, her body reacting automatically to her with intense waves of feelings washing over her and one person continuously, wonderfully occupying her mind, unable to stop it even if she wanted to. It’s new and nice and overwhelming at the same time and she surrenders herself to all the new feelings rather willingly, raw emotions guiding her actions, evidently. 

 

It all came easy when she laid eyes on her.

 

And when the control she has always had and reassuringly clung to previously is starting to incrementally slip through her fingers slightly it should maybe logically have scared her but surprisingly it absolutely doesn’t. Her carefully crafted rules apparently do not apply here. The other woman’s presence undeniably wraps around her like a safe blanket, a tender soothing and certainty that nothing bad can or will happen if she opens up and lets her guard down, shares deeper thoughts and makes herself vulnerable, to slowly venture into the now less intimidatingly unfamiliar together. Without really noticing she’s already let her in where she’s kept others at a distance. 

 

It’s a rarity, she thinks, meeting someone who you feel so comfortable with this quickly. Talking to her is easier than talking to anyone else and every time gets better. 

 

Maybe it’s because she’s familiar with the way people can stare and practically leer at her sometimes but wholly unfamiliar with the precise way Seungwan looks at her. Completely different. It is different from anything she thought she would feel. It feels like she suddenly, finally, understands the excitement that can come with it and she’s also aware that she does the same, stares at Seungwan without meaning to a lot, and now she wonders, briefly, if this is what people meant when they told her that sometimes you just know. Because since she has met Seungwan, who makes her feel good and giddy and a strange, unexpected combination of calm and jittery at the same time without any effort, she’s starting to see some truth in that statement. 

 

And she guesses it’s true what people say about good things coming to the ones who wait. Because she would patiently wait all that time again, or longer even, if it meant she’d end up right here. Rationally, it may be silly as they’ve only known each other for such a short time but at the same time she can’t help but feel that way. She’s not of the idea that she might be incapable of feeling like that anymore. That slightly upsetting thought hasn’t bothered her once in the last two or so weeks. 

 

She just knows somehow, every fibre of her being telling her that it is an incredibly good thing they have going on already and she can’t speak for Seungwan of course but their interactions tell her she feels similarly. Wants so bad to continue it too, explore where this could or will go. She didn’t know it was possible for another person to have such an immediate effect on her. They get along so well and instantly clicked. Seungwan is kind, open, understanding and so respectful and as honest about wanting to know silly small things —talking about literally anything is fun, the other could probably read the back of a shampoo bottle to her and she’d be hooked— as she is about not so subtly and slowly tracing every line and curve of her face with her eyes.

 

But they don’t have to talk. They can just as easily sit or walk in silence without it being even slightly strained or forced. And that’s very new for her. Though there’s also a delightful crackling underlying tension that hangs in between them. 

 

It leaves her wanting more. Much more. 

 

After thinking about it long and hard over the weekend she wants to reason to herself that it’s because there’s been a strong, undeniable connection between them ever since their first meeting. One that immediately chased her shyness away which would normally be present and interfering quite a bit around people she doesn’t know.

 

It felt more important than any other time in her life when she’s met someone new. 

 

And that’s just the thing, perhaps the crux of it all. Because it never really felt like Seungwan was someone she didn’t know. There’s an inexplainable, almost predetermined trust and familiarity as the foundation established from the very start already. A connection, emotionally and intellectually, and it makes a world of a difference. She has always been about that connection and the warmth, and with that the rest comes naturally now. They built on that foundation. Nothing else in her life has ever been able to provoke the same reactions from her. She can just be around Seungwan and show more of herself, doesn’t feel too wrapped up in her mind either but in the moment, at peace while focusing all her attention on her. With her it’s uncomplicated.

 

It’s intoxicating, the way they take their time, move slow and without any sort of urgency. 

 

It is undeniable that Seungwan has been running through her mind a lot and she’s not complaining at all, not in the slightest, doesn’t think she ever would but now she had to (and miraculously also actually managed) to put all her raging thoughts, feelings and the plethora of memories at the back of her mind and focus on her work instead. 

Mostly…. She’s compartmentalising. Even though she is conscientious she’s certain her willpower will waver at some point later this afternoon and it will all come rushing back uncontrollably.

 

Currently, Joohyun is in a meeting which she secretly hopes will end sooner rather than later for several reasons. While the weather outside is just a lot of rain and mist and quickly plummeting temperatures, a bleak scene at the other side of the window that elicits a feeling of melancholy which isn’t helping her situation at all, she’s sitting in the second largest conference room on their floor. They are now on the topic of going over the outcomes of the meetings she had with their colleagues in Tokyo the week before. 

 

At least that was the intention. 

 

Alas, by a weird sequence of events which she cannot for the life of her recall due to the absurd level of mental gymnastics it required, they ended up in their current situation where they are impossibly side-tracked from the original discussion and everyone in the room has now been listening to Mr. Jin’s mansplaining for the last 5 minutes. It has at least 90% of the room completely puzzled and in particular all the women more than a little irritated and deciding that this is not worth any of their attention. A few of the men have also realised this and are shifting uncomfortably in their seats, looking around gingerly to see if anyone else is picking up on this. Well… yes, of course. Practically everyone has except the newest ‘expert’ who is unstoppable in giving his unsolicited advice and embarrassing himself more and more the longer he talks, encouraged by some ignorant men. And also Mrs. Ahn, who’s from a different generation and nowadays much more preoccupied with the free snacks she has brought back for everyone than anything else as she’s nearing her retirement age and thus not really tuned in anyway. She can let that slide. 

 

Apparently reading a couple articles online over the weekend and having heard of some fancy terms in hallways and college parties outweighs the knowledge gained by a female colleague who has completed an undergraduate and graduate degree on that specific topic. At least it is becoming clear that it is his bold opinion. An unappreciated opinion.

 

At this point she’s been silently sharing knowing and incredulous glances with some people around her to try and communicate to decide who’s turn it is to manage the situation while simultaneously having her own mantra of ‘think nice things’ playing in her head. Of all possible things this is definitely not something she wants to deal with on her first day back in the office and especially not on a Monday.

 

However, her thoughts are interrupted as her attention is drawn to her phone when the screen silently lights up from where it lays beside her notebook on the table in front of her, indicating she received a new message. Joohyun her eyebrows quirk up reflexively in surprise and she leans forward to see who it is, tilting the screen towards herself. 

 

Okay… she was able to focus. 

 

Instantly she feels the steady thrumming in her chest returning and mind flooding with warmth and Seungwan again at the sight of her name above the notification. Honestly, she has always thought it was rather hard to distract her, especially during work and she prides herself on that, but maybe the younger woman is an exception because she’s a bit too successful in doing just that. Even with somethings as simple and minimal as her name. 

 

Quietly she tries to clear as she puts her phone in her lap, far away from potentially prying eyes —though they should know better than to even try—. Joohyun’s slightly relieved that she hasn’t put anything other than ‘Seungwan’ as the contact detail, despite hovering over it for quite some time debating whether to change it to Seungwan-ah as a reminder of how extremely pretty she blushed when she said it last time. Still, it’s probably better like this for now and also much safer to check it in her office. Not so much because of what Seungwan might have send her but more so her own immediate reaction to anything concerning the younger woman. Also, no matter how much she dislikes the current situation of the meeting she doesn’t want to be unprofessional and do exactly what she wants her colleagues not to do. But the temptation is there. 

 

She desperately hopes her face doesn’t reflect the uncontrollable happiness as she tries to twist her lips into a shape that is less giddily delighted, her annoyance from before quickly evaporating into thin air. She really tries but she fails spectacularly if she’s judging by the curious looks she’s currently receiving from her friends, Taeyeon and Yongsun sitting across the table and Henry next to her. Turning her chair slightly, she stubbornly looks the other way, refusing to give them the satisfaction of acknowledgement and she shifts in her seat, her legs, one crossed over the other, starting to bounce very lightly. Now she has even more reason to want this all to end. Frankly, very preferably in the next few minutes or so.

 

It takes a little bit longer than that but today Sunmi finds the energy to gracefully and calmly put an end to everyone’s shared misery and the heated rebuttal that just started and after another twenty minutes of actual productive discussions the meeting is closed. She has to resist the huge urge to swiftly gather her belongings and walk out as soon as it is over to make a beeline for her office when her mind is racing with what Seungwan might have sent her. Instead, she tries to appear nonchalant and as she would normally when she slips out of the room with the others, squaring her shoulders and struggling to adjust her pace as she walks through the hallway to not seem too eager to leave them behind and get on with her day.

 

“Irene, wait a minute!”

 

Apparently not subtle enough, she thinks, a little grumbled. At least not for the people that really know her. 

 

With Yongsun following hot on her heels she grips her notebook tighter and releases a silent groan, briefly closing her eyes. The devil’s duo has been surprisingly not too inquisitive for the past week and they’re undoubtedly up to something but she was foolishly naive to think that she’d have some complete peace and quiet or that she schooled her expression quick enough earlier to not draw attention to herself. True enough, Yongsun has noticed and remembered and it seems like she has decided to step up to the task of finding out what’s gotten that peculiar reaction out of her. Which makes things exponentially more challenging for herself. 

 

Still, she tries to play it off like she’s not in a hurry and walks into the kitchen under the (very false) pretence of wanting to go there in the first place before anyone else got there. Nothing else. While she thoroughly rinses her mug in the sink and fills it with cold water from the machine afterwards she feels a pair of eyes on her back, an amusedly smiling Yongsun hovering quietly in the doorway with her arms crossed. 

 

On her way out she walks past the other and rolls her eyes as she follows silently again down the last hallway. With her arms full of papers, a mug in her hands and her phone burning for attention in the back pocket of her jeans, she pushes the handle down with her elbow and forces herself through the door before attempting to kick it shut behind her with a swiftness that she hopes will get the message across that she is not to be disturbed. She has important matters to get to after all. Nearly all of them work-related, though they are considerably less pressing to her at this moment. 

 

However, agile and determined, Yongsun easily slips through before it closes completely and a breathless laugh falls from her lips, full of teasing. She tuts her tongue against her teeth. “Not so fast.”

 

Joohyun sighs exaggeratedly and rolls her eyes good-naturedly, only looking up briefly before continuing putting her things in their rightful place again and busying herself with starting up her laptop as she sits down behind her desk. “Hi Solar, you need something from me?” she asks curtly. 

 

“Ohh~, what’s this now? Why does your good mood not extend to me?”

 

It doesn’t get the response she’d hoped for. Much to her displeasure it’s the complete opposite; the other woman only walks further into the room and makes it a point to settle herself comfortably in the chair on the other side of her desk. 

 

“I didn’t know I still had to be accommodating and polite to people that follow me and intrude while I clearly have stuff to do”, she counters immediately with no real bite to her tone and an eyebrow arched in a challenge.

 

Unbothered, Yongsun brushes the comment to the side. “I’m sure I saw something just now. Anything happened in Tokyo that you’d like to share?”, she asks, smiling smugly when she comes forward and leans her forearms on the desk.

 

Joohyun shrugs. “You might have forgotten because of the ‘spectacular’ interlude but we did just have a meeting about that and there’s nothing more to say. Is there something specific you’re after?” 

 

“I don’t know, you tell me.”

 

“Hmm, what makes you think I have something to tell you?”

 

Yongsun laughs at that, utterly amused, which prompts Joohyun to finally look up and meet her gaze fully, a little startled by the sudden outburst. “Well, your mysterious smile in there for starters,” she begins, looking at her pointedly and Joohyun would huff if only she knew it wasn’t true. “And, ah, you also couldn’t wait to get out of the meeting and no, obviously I’m not buying that ‘have-to-get-water’ act you pulled. I know you. Something’s different and I can’t yet place it but you seem… light for some reason.”

 

She slowly takes a sip from her drink as she leans back, temporarily hiding behind the mug as the other continues to stare at her quizzically, eyes narrowed and one finger tapping her chin like she’s deep in thought. She takes a deep steadying breath as she places the mug back down, bracing herself for what she knows is coming. 

 

Yongsun is one of the few colleagues Joohyun actively seeks out at work which means that, as her friend of almost 2 years now, she also has more information regarding her private life than almost anyone else in the building. And she’s sharp, usually noticing even the smallest details so it’s not a question of whether she connects the dots that she tries her best to hide but when. Which is a somewhat intimidating prospect. 

 

After a minute more of being scrutinised and a deafening silence hanging around them she starts to feel impatient and increasingly nervous, her resolve thinning the longer she leaves her thoughts running wild and unconsciously she has started holding her breath. Exactly when she risks taking a brief, longing peek from the corner of her eyes at her phone laying face down to the side and an imperceptible smile slowly tugs the corners of her lips upwards before she realises, Yongsun perks up and snaps her fingers, eyes shimmering as if she has finally cracked her unbreakable code. 

 

“What?” she asks quickly, tilting her head and brows furrowing. 

 

The other wags an accusatory finger in her face, smiling wickedly wide. “You… You are seeing someone.”

 

She holds her ground for about five more seconds, levelling her stare, stoic and her face not revealing anything before she sighs defeatedly and shakes her head, running a hand through her hair to get the attention away from her face. She can’t do this, not right now. Most of all not here.

 

But it’s enough confirmation for Yongsun apparently. “Oh Joohyun, you so are!”

 

“Shhhh~, keep it down will you? You sound just like Yeri”, she grumbles.

 

Yongsun chuckles, knowing very well how Yeri can get when she’s excited, especially with anything regarding Joohyun her ‘mysterious’ love life, who seems significantly less thrilled by the extra attention. She relaxes back in her chair and picks up a pencil from the holder, twirling it between her fingers as she goes over the new revelation, contemplating how much she should ask Joohyun. She knows Joohyun is a private person, reserved and tight-lipped, and asking too many things at once or coaxing information out of her (prematurely) has the exact opposite effect. It’s better to give her time, respect her clear boundaries and let her mull it over on her own. She’ll share more if and when she wants to. Even if she decides to elaborate she’ll be concise. Some things she just has no intention of getting further into, her innermost thoughts and details held close to her heart.

 

But she also can’t resist the temptation. Presented with such a rare opportunity she cannot just take it for granted and let it pass by. It’s intriguing to see Joohyun like this. Joohyun, the picture of composure, with the familiar light in her eyes now dancing a little differently, a giddy smile slipping through her pretend unbreakable tough and headstrong exterior earlier, the softness she personally knows to be there coming through and showing itself ever so slightly. Very briefly before she attempts to hide it again, determined as always.

 

Yongsun nudges her friend gently because that unfiltered happiness she just got a glimpse of looks very good on her. 

 

“So, who is this lucky person then?”

 

Joohyun can feel a shy smile blossom on her face as she very softly mumbles under her breath, almost inaudible. “Me. I’m the lucky one.”

 

Her eyes dart up to watch the others reaction quickly, alarmed at her own honesty that slipped out before she could think better of it. The woman opposite her eyes the faint pink tint in her cheeks with amusement but spares her the horror of bringing more attention to it and just nods in gentle understanding, asking her “What’s she like?”

 

Oh, now there are lot of things she could say, pick any of the superlatives instantly presenting themselves in her head, but she settles for saying the very first thing that comes to mind. “… like sunshine”, she says slowly, a small, fond smile pulling the corners of her lips upwards at the thought. She is something else. 

 

The look she receives from the other woman has now morphed into one of surprise, encouragement and, above all, genuine interest. She is very tempted to say more but before she says too much and Yongsun won’t ever leave her alone in peace she clears , a bit embarrassed, and looks away, feeling like she already revealed more than she’d intended to share to anyone today. Or just in general. 

 

“N-now go, I really do have other things to do. Go bother your own people”, she says, waving her hand towards the door, her voice despite the slight shake clear and firm, but never harsh. 

 

Yongsun laughs loudly but eventually does get up and resigns after taking a quick look at her watch and registering the determined look on Joohyun her face, back to normal. Almost… it looks a bit odd coupled to the slight flush still on her cheeks. It’s a little unfamiliar but it speaks volumes, especially when it’s Joohyun. And she won’t push her. 

 

“Fine. But this was a good chat, should definitely do this again sometime soon, alright? And this looks good on you by the way.” 

 

The other doesn’t elaborate on what she means by that last part but it’s quite clear to Joohyun with the way she looks at her.

 

“Bye Solar.”

 

With that Yongsun rolls her eyes, now looking permanently amused, and leaves her office space. As soon as the door clicks shut again Joohyun releases a loud sigh and rubs her temples, willing the blush to subside and her thoughts to calm down, regaining some composure. 

 

After a minute she settles comfortably in her chair and finally picks up her phone, biting her bottom lip nervously to stop the excitement from spilling out. Her heart stutters in anticipation as she finally opens the messaging app. 

 

Seungwan: 

Hi Joohyun, I hope you enjoyed the rest of your weekend!

I have a question

Nothing bad I promise :)

 

She takes a quick glance at the door. People know better than to come into her office unannounced so there’s nothing stopping the smile tugging the corners of her lips impossibly upwards. Enjoyable? Well, that is certainly one adjective to describe it she supposes. 

 

Joohyun: 

Could very well have been in a carrot cake-induced coma by now. It was heavenly, Seungwan. Really 

Also ask away :)

 

She’s not sure if the younger is still online given the fact that it has taken her some time to get back to her, first being held up by her frustrating meeting and then trying to shake off Yongsun with her good-natured interests that propelled her to follow her into the office like she was her long-lost shadow. Fortunately she knows not to push her too much. She reasons that Seungwan must be equally busy and not glued to her phone all day so she doesn’t expect an instant reply but she waits anyway with her phone in her hand, not yet bothering with busying herself with work when she knows with absolute certainty that she won’t be able to do anything truly productive right now. Not when Seungwan has invaded her brain again and is about 1000x more interesting than any of the things on her list. 

 

Rationally, she should at least try but she wants to indulge in the distraction that is Seungwan for a little bit more, as if the past day (or week) hasn’t been enough.

 

While she waits her gaze unconsciously gravitates to the other’s profile picture in the corner as she lets her thoughts drift off, wondering whether, or when, it would be acceptable for her to start following her on instagram. Or request more accurately. She has checked before, impulsively, late at night when she couldn’t sleep and her thoughts drifted again, but was disappointed to find out that it’s on private, like hers. Because there’s a considerable lack of pictures available to her —far too few for her liking—, especially since she couldn’t convince Yeri or Joy to send one over, who only told her she should work for it. Unhelpful, but she understands. Except now she has stared at —appreciated— this particular one a little too long with a stupid smile she can’t possibly bite back. She knows it. 

 

As she is about to close the application with a shake of her head, determined to focus on work because she does actually have other things to do today, the ellipsis appear at the bottom of the screen and she’s immediately dragged back, a pleasant swooping sensation going through her in anticipation.

 

Seungwan:

Wow 

You finished it already?!

 

Joohyun:

Not yet but I did have to protect it with my life

 

Seungwan:

Oh…

Yeri clocked it?

 

She snorts, highly amused, as she remembers that Seungwan would be intimately familiar with exactly that behaviour. She immediately knew she was referring to Yeri, like there was no other possibility. The youngest must have done exactly the same numerous times to her and probably even more often since she can snatch anything she baked right from her hands when it’s not even completely ready and still scalding hot. It wouldn’t surprise her. 

 

Joohyun:

Within 2 minutes!

Can you believe it?

I had to give her a slice to hold the peace :(

 

Seungwan: 

Of course she did

It’s for the greater good I suppose

Nobody likes a hangry Yeri 

 

Joohyun: 

Too bad she’s never not hungry… 

 

Seungwan:

hahaha 

 

Joohyun: 

:P

So what’s this question you have for me?

 

Seungwan:

Right, so it’s kind of random 

But, if you could have lunch with anyone in the world, dead or alive, who would it be?

 

Joohyun looks at the question, her brows furrowing in confusion and she stares off in the distance while she thinks about it, her fingers hovering over the screen to type as soon as the answer presents itself in her mind. It’s not something she has ever thought about previously and she can’t come up with a good answer on the spot. 

 

Joohyun: 

hmm, I don’t know

I have never thought about it..

Did you think of someone?

 

Seungwan:

I did :)

 

Joohyun: 

Dead or alive?

 

Seungwan:

Very much alive still, luckily

 

Joohyun:

Okay, now I’m curious. Who is it?

Have I heard of them?

 

Given the relatively consistent timing between their messages just now it is notable and somewhat surprising that there’s a short silence that follows. It lasts about a minute and something about the break in the flow of conversation makes her think harder about the question. Really think about it. When the penny drops she can feel a smile spreading across her face, growing impossibly larger and morphing into a smug smirk as she immediately types out her message, her cheeks aching from the strain. When she hits sends she receives an incoming one from Seungwan at the same time. 

 

Joohyun:

Do you want to go for lunch with me this week? 

 

Seungwan:

I’d like to have lunch with you 

Argghhhh…

You know you just ruined my perfect set up :(

 

She chuckles heartily, at the mercy of her feelings when her pulse jumps and a bubbly feeling spreads inside her chest. Seungwan tried to be smooth in her set up but she saw right through it. This was definitely not a random question but a disguised way to ask her out again and it’s extremely cute but even funnier and somewhat surprising that she saw through it before Seungwan could execute it to the end. She’s becoming more familiar with the other’s mind and antics and she has to admit that she really likes that idea. 

 

Joohyun:

Should’ve just come out and asked then 

:o

 

Seungwan:

In that case

Joohyun, I don’t know how to tell you this but… 

I am gay

 

Joohyun: 

I got that feeling but thank you for telling me

Very good to know

 

She grins from ear to ear, staring at the screen happily. There’s a little world all of it’s own in this chat and it’s great. 

 

Feeling particularly encouraged by Seungwan her response and also a bit bold, Joohyun types out a new message with hands that tremble slightly in nervous excitement.

 

Joohyun: 

I am too, if you are interested.. 

 

The reaction is almost instantaneous and her heart skips a beat, her mind now truly a mess. 

 

Seungwan:

;)

Perfect

 

 

Oh god, she’s in trouble. 

 

The best kind of trouble.

 

This Seungwan, forward and on a mission is dangerous. And if not dangerous then very, very appealing. She wonders if she may have unleashed this upon herself after Saturday.

 

At this point she doesn’t even know why she still tries to bite back the untameable smile threatening to split her face in half anymore. It clearly isn’t working and the tips of her ears feel very warm. She takes a shaky breath, closing her eyes and calms herself for a second, schooling her expression. Somehow, weirdly, it is easier to hold it together when she’s actually standing right in front of her.

 

Joohyun: 

I’ll make it up to you for ruining your cute attempt to ask me out to lunch if you go to dinner with me instead?

I’ve got a tight schedule this week but in the evenings I’m all free

 

To be fair, she does have a week ahead that’s less than relaxed. She’ll be racing from one meeting to the other and working on numerous deadlines in between. Although she is more flexible with her schedule due to her higher position and could maybe reschedule one or two lunch meetings she has planned with her closer colleagues to go discuss their work from last week, dinner still sounds more inviting to her. Because for lunch breaks she still has to adhere to the allocated time and dinner, in her own free time that she can fill in the way she wants, promises that there won’t be interruptions or distractions. Or fewer at least. And given her current situation she’s also not sure she can instantly go back to focusing on her work afterwards.

 

So, it’s a win-win if she gets to have dinner with her after work.

 

Seungwan:

Isn’t this what they call bribery??

 

Joohyun: 

Ahem, it is not bribery!

If anything it’s an incentive at most

 

Seungwan:

Alright, but you should know I definitely don’t need an incentive to want to see you 

 

One corner of curves upwards slightly into half a smirk with a will of its own and Joohyun bites the inside of her cheek, which by now should have nice indentations of her teeth marked into it, her excitement a bit more than she can properly contain. She believes it’s true. There might be something like hope swirling in their eyes when they meet and (intently) look at each other, yes, but there are no pressing expectations, which she’s never had before. It’s unfathomably electrifying each and every time it happens. 

 

Just as she’s thinking of what she can even reply to that Seungwan beats her to it.

 

Seungwan: 

Does Wednesday around 18:30 sound good to you?

 

Joohyun: 

Yeah that sounds great

 

Seungwan:

:)

I know a nice little place we could go to, I’ll send you the address later. Just let me know if you’re up for it

But very unfortunately I have to get back to work now…

So talk to you later?

 

Joohyun: 

Sure

I’m looking forward to it

Yeah, talk to you later Seungwan

With a satisfied, silly smile she puts her phone away and far out of her sight. She should really get back to doing her job now, lest she jeopardises her new plans. 

 

She is definitely reenergised after this impromptu, wonderful break she just treated herself to and the new appointment in her schedule that she’s already looking forward to infinitely more than anything else is an exceptionally great motivator. 

 

 

 

 

 

…….

 

 

 

 

Wednesday comes sooner than Joohyun could have hoped for. When the time for her to leave the office rolls around it is however, perhaps even a bit too soon as she is caught up in work. Diligently working on the task she assigned herself for the moment, she only absentmindedly registered that the sun had begun its descent upon the horizon a while back and has now left everything around her bathed in darkness. 

 

She is focused and right in the middle of carefully crafting a last-minute, important and quite sensitive email that unfortunately cannot wait until tomorrow. She keeps deleting and rephrasing parts to have the tone exactly right and eventually, when she’s content with it and made sure that all the right recipients are listed, sends it out and she gets ready to leave. It is about 20 minutes later than she originally intended and she would have preferred but she supposes that it is exactly why she had the foresight to spend some extra time in the morning to get all of her stuff ready and bring it with her, just in case she wouldn’t be able to stop by her apartment to quickly change into more appropriate clothes and touch up on her make up. At times like this she is especially glad with that characteristic.

After retrieving her bag from the coat rack she locks the door behind her and takes off to the restroom to freshen up. The bag has been a subtle reminder of her eagerly awaited evening activities throughout the day, as opposed to the not so subtly blocked out evening in her calendar. It feels like a small accomplishment that she hasn’t gotten distracted more often today in the few spare moments in between schedules. She wonders if Seungwan had the same problem. 

 

Once in the restroom she somewhat awkwardly moves in the limited space to change into a different shirt and fresh pair of slacks, leaning her body against the wall for balance as she tries her best to prevent her clothes from touching the floor. After having changed she checks her make up in the big, well-lit mirror and lets her hair free from her ponytail, smoothening out the kink that has formed during the day and trying to salvage it as much as possible. Then she gives herself a final once-over before making her way over to the elevator to go down to the underground car park and to her date. 

 

She makes her way over to the restaurant Seungwan suggested, which (to her own relief) turned out to be an amiable Italian place she has been to once before and still roughly remembers how to find by herself —at least she likes to think so—. While doing so she feels the familiar nerves synonymous with all the things concerning Seungwan rising again, bouncing around in her stomach, and the thrumming in her chest reappearing. The good kind of nervousness, the tinge of fear of the unknown and insecurity pleasantly absent and replaced by a healthy dose of excitement and anticipation. Ultimately all these nerves are brought about by thoughts of the possibilities. 

 

She turns up the music a bit and tries to hum along to the calm melody to rid herself of some of the nerves and drown out the annoyance of the honking cars around her at the same time.

 

After a quick 15 minute drive through bearable traffic she arrives at her destination with the help of her navigation. Luckily she finds a place to park her car relatively close and with a faint smile firmly on her lips she walks up to the restaurant hurriedly, eager to get out of the chill and find herself in the company of Seungwan. Once she steps inside she declines the host her helpful offer of looking up at which table she will be seated and turns to the right side of the room with a purpose, pauses for a second and almost instantaneously locks eyes with Seungwan, finding each other so easily and her entire body hums to life. 

 

She already caught a glimpse of her through the big front windows when she walked up to the door. Unsuspecting, Seungwan was too busy admiring the fairy lights hanging on the wall to notice anything else but now that she does she revels in the way a warm smile emerges on her face and reaches her eyes. They light up a bit more upon recognition, something that might exist only for her. 

 

It’s interesting to think that it can sometimes be hard to make and maintain eye contact with people but that is definitely not a concern when it comes to Seungwan. Quite the opposite; she almost can’t look away. It calms her down and excites her at the same time. 

 

From across the room the other woman mouths ‘Hi’ with a wave of her fingers, bubbly and smiling in that rapturous way of hers that lights up any room and which has found a permanent place in her head already. Something about it says that she’s just as happy to see her as she is and that is a feeling that knocks the air out of her lungs and makes her pulse quicken in all the right ways. 

 

Seungwan has her hair pinned back behind one ear and her eyes are bright, dark browns glittery with that tiny speck of colour that pulls her irresistibly in and stand out even in the dimly lit space and from a distance. And it may be on purpose but the light purplish sweater she’s wearing might easily be the tipping point for Joohyun her sanity after this long day…. she looks really good in it. 

 

She draws in a careful sharp breath, thankful for the distance still between them when she does, and weaves between the few tables with her knees feeling the tiniest bit like jelly at the other her unwavering gaze. A knowing smile graces her lips at that. Like herself, Seungwan’s eyes are also not so subtly drinking her in, slowly trailing up and down but she doesn’t seem to care how obvious it may be and Joohyun also certainly doesn’t. It’s clear that neither is even trying to pretend they’re not taking in the sight of the other anymore. There’s no hiding or maybe they can’t control it. 

 

And maybe she like the latter better.

 

Upon the sight of Joohyun confidently walking towards her, those eyes intently focused on her dizzying, Seungwan allows herself to take in the slacks and comfortable looking blouse she is wearing. It looks more business and professional chic than the other times she has seen her but she looks stunning in anything and it’s probably a good thing they are not in the same workplace because she is absolutely sure she wouldn’t be able to handle more of this if she’s judging by the current swooping feeling in her stomach and linguistic abilities leaving her body. The older her hair is also down in soft, dark waves in a way that is slightly messy and she has never seen before but instantly decides she really likes and the thought that she would love to bury her fingers in them and what it would feel like to do so intrudes her mind. It’s brief, can’t be more than a split second, but it’s long enough to make her blush, warmth spreading up the back of her neck and the tips of her ears. It surprises her slightly as she has never really had vivid thoughts like this before and she swallows thickly. She quickly glances up, catching Joohyun her eye again when she is already standing right next to the table and her mind immediately comes to a stuttering halt again. Because holy-

 

“Care if I join you?” Joohyun asks with an alluring, easy-going half smile, already carefully sitting down before Seungwan can reply. She doesn’t exactly need an answer anyway.

 

“Definitely not.”

 

With an amused smile playing on her lips and excitement and anticipation rushing through her she settles in her seat and shimmies out of her coat, hanging it on the back of her chair. While she does, Seungwan tries not to watch her every move at first but gets distracted by the way her hair falls in her face as she puts her bag down under the table and how she ‘fixes’ it afterwards by running a hand through her locks and flicking it off her shoulder. As if anything could be even better than it already was. 

 

When Joohyun is done she focuses on the woman in front of her again. A second passes before they wordlessly break out into a grin, mirroring each other for a moment, warm and open and sparks fly. It’s something about their shared looks, magnetised and profound, invigorating, that leaves her a little awestruck every time and causes tingles like electricity to spread over her skin. Seungwan has had that effect on her from the start and it doesn’t lessen or wane the more frequently they find themselves in this situation. It only grows. 

 

After what feels like forever, neither keen to stop whatever it is they are doing, Seungwan’s expression changes, softens almost, and then she is talking and breaking their comfortable silence.

 

“Looking stunning as always”, Seungwan says softly, sincere and with a small smile, maintaining eye contact, cheeks still a little rosy. 

 

Joohyun blinks a few times. She sounds more unapologetic and certainly less nervous than any time she said something similar before, Joohyun thinks. Not even the slightest hint of hesitation or backtracking is present, making her believe she has taken her words from last time to heart and that is very satisfying. Also the younger’s voice, something text can’t possibly convey and her memory doesn’t quite do justice, is so warm she wants to wrap it around her forever. 

 

It feels like they are picking up from last Saturday. Effortlessly continuing their easy way of communication, saying a million things with only a look, to right now. Like not enough time has passed to come down from that high or something has permanently shifted into place then. Either way it feels great and thrilling and she has to admit that she is impressed that the other doesn’t even build up to it but instead immediately starts off like this. Like she couldn’t hold it in any longer. She commits to it.

 

Joohyun suppresses the smile trying to tug the corners of her lips upwards and shrugs lightly to hide the way her heart pounds in her chest at her words. It is exponentially harder to school her expression when Seungwan tilts her head slightly and a slow grin takes over her whole face. Happy and blinding and practically all cheek, her eyes squinted and sparkling, clearly quite pleased with herself. 

 

She rolls her eyes before looking down at what she’s wearing, hanging on to the composure she still possesses and then smiles coyly as she looks up, locking eyes again. “Hardly. Especially not after a long working day.” Then with a slight curve of her lips she adds, as if it’s an afterthought, “Now you though…” She lets her voice trails off softly, letting the sentence hang between them when she can’t find the right words that encompass it all. That are worthy.

 

Two can play this game. 

 

An extremely pretty blush blossoms on the other her cheeks when she registers her words and the implication fully, a little taken by surprise that she turned it around to directly hand the compliment back. It’s a gentle albeit increasingly flirtatious give and take they seemingly fall into every time without effort since that faithful first meeting. 

 

For a second it looks like Seungwan is about to protest, already starting to open to retort with the first thing that comes to mind and brows furrowing, her eyes endearingly expressive as always, but she beats her to it after taking a brief glance at her watch and clearing . If given the chance they would probably be able to go back and forth endlessly, but this is not a point of contention in her opinion. “Have you been waiting long?”

 

The other blinks slowly, catching up to the change and decides to let it go for now, give her this win which, well… is nothing less than a win for her too. “Oh no, no, I just got here myself actually,” she assures her quickly, shaking her head and hand in emphasis. 

 

Joohyun nods lightly, relieved. “That’s good, I wouldn’t want to make you wait. I hate being late.”

 

Seungwan listens carefully and doesn’t say what is on the tip of her tongue and threatening to slip through her lips if she’s not very careful. Which is that she’d wait much, much longer for her than anybody else to show up or for anything really. She also forgoes mentioning that she is not late at all but instead she remembers a quote she saw somewhere in the past and she imagines the older agrees with. 

 

“Being early is on time, on time is late and late is-”

 

“-unacceptable”, Joohyun finishes with her, leaning herself back in her chair, relaxed and smiling in amusement as she focuses on the kind eyes across the table once again. 

 

The younger nods fervently and makes a gesture, sending finger guns her way entirely too excited and sudden for something so small. “Exactly!” 

 

And the thought that it really shouldn’t legal to be that adorable pops into her head. She can only stare in awe, intrigued and highly amused by every tiny detail that makes up the brown-eyed woman in front of her. Joohyun chuckles lightly, a warm buzz spreading through her and she catches her bottom lip between her teeth to keep herself from smiling too wide when Seungwan stops to look at her somewhat curiously, perhaps even confused. 

 

With a slight, dismissive shake of her head and before Seungwan can feel too embarrassed under her prolonged inquisitive and appreciative attention she slides the Tupperware container given to her by the younger the last time they saw each other slowly across the table, moving a candle out of the way when she does. In her opinion she shouldn’t be embarrassed at all but the first sign was already visible when she started rubbing the side of her face, seemingly trying to subdue the insanely beautiful rosy tint it now sports. It’s something she’s picked up on their time together. 

 

One of the many things. 

 

But even though it’s cute she would much rather see that small beaming smile again.

 

By the looks of it Seungwan didn’t even notice she brought it out before. She looks confused before her whole face lights up in recognition when she tears her gaze away from her face to actually look at the object in question. But only after a delay, her eyes lingering on her a beat too long. 

 

If there even is such a thing as too long between them. It feels like that is just their thing, their own irresistible normal. 

 

Seungwan hums softly as she taps the lid with a finger rhythmically, Joohyun following the movement happening so close to her own lingering hand with the greatest of interest. Who knew that just the idea of feeling her hand in hers again would strike her like this. 

 

“It’s all finished now?” Seungwan asks as she breaks out into a shy, almost lazy smile, incredibly overjoyed with the idea that the older liked her cake enough to finish it within days. Almost all by herself. 

 

Unconsciously Joohyun mirrors her expression, lips stretching into a wide smile because the sight is simply too contagious. “Yeah, it was probably the best I’ve ever had.” 

 

She stares at her, getting distracted as she lets herself take in the way her eyes are accentuated by the light flickering in them and how she steals all the attention and looks just a tad bit accomplished at the praise. As she should be because she wasn’t lying.

 

Now she is also kind of curious to find out how the other will react when she finds the little surprise she put in there and she already feels nervous but giddily excited just imagining it, almost child-like. As she got the container from the drying rack next to the sink, any remnant of cake completely erased but definitely not her memory of it, she eyed it for a while, toying with it in her hands and thinking of how she could properly thank her. Let her know how much she appreciated the kind gesture. And the cake too of course. 

 

After thinking about it she decided on putting a small sticky note on the inside of the lid for her to find when she uses it next time, almost unnoticeable. She likes doing things like that occasionally, sneakily hiding one in a pocket or somewhere equally unlikely for someone to check or expect such a thing. The whole point is that it’s for the person to find only when the moment has already passed and is then brought back to that moment upon reading it. Truthfully, she initially started doing it because writing it down is often easier than saying it directly to their faces. She seems to struggle to articulate it in the specific, detailed way she wants to and means and she’s way too shy to do so most of the time as well. This seemed like a clever solution at the time and she has continued to do so since then.

 

Written on the one piece of paper carefully stuck on the inside of the container Seungwan is now holding is a short little heart-felt thank you note and a kind of attempt at a flirty suggestion for a follow up with a simple drawing of an awfully cute cartoon hamster that she came across online —completely by chance— and reminded her a little of Seungwan. 

 

It’s cute but not cuter than her though.

 

Thinking about cute, she’s reminded of what she told her last time. It being that the cake was cute because Seungwan made it and the exact (desired) reaction it earned her. If she got a cake like the one Seungwan made at a shop she would probably recommend it to people she knows and perhaps even leave a good review on their website if they have that. She would do the same for Seungwan were it not for the fact that she kind of wants to keep it all to herself. 

 

Or her. 

 

Mainly her. 

 

And that idea pushes her heart into a frenzy and makes her breath hitch the tiniest bit, goosebumps spreading over her skin. 

 

Seungwan seems happy with just the compliment alone though, unaware of the plethora of other thoughts even if to her it feels like everything is painfully easy to read on her face, unable to control it all the way she normally does. But these are far from her usual normal circumstances. There is so much going on inside her when it comes to Seungwan that it is hopeless. And she finds that she doesn’t necessarily want to either. It feels too good to be like this in her presence, to simply let herself experience and get used to these feelings. She can order her thoughts again at a later point. 

 

Seungwan smiles brightly, her teeth on full display. “Well, I’m honoured. And this can go right back to where it belongs. I have a lot, so I didn’t miss it much. You should see how many I have, it’s,“ she motions animatedly with her hands in the air, cheeks puffing up, “pff, quite a lot. I actually have a shelf full of them, different sizes and everything. Well, I used to anyway because I think a fair number have never made the trip back from Yeri and Joy’s place.” Seungwan attempts to look annoyed by that but it doesn’t really work. She clearly adores them too much and is too excited to talk about something related to what she loves doing in her free time. It is evident from the way the corners of her lips are persistently curved upwards and she has that shiny, passionate look in her eyes and her voice gets more bouncy and slightly faster than usual and well… Joohyun can’t look away, entranced. 

 

She does get stuck on one particular part of that sentence though. 

 

It echoes in her mind, filling the brief moment of calm and comfortable quietness. 

 

Feeling a little brave and before she can overthink it she raises an eyebrow and her eyes start shimmering playfully. “Is that an invitation?”

 

The younger is confused for only a second before she starts blushing crimson, flustered by herself as it finally dawns on her. Seungwan didn’t really mean it like that. Not intentionally anyway. But now that it is brought up… She can’t say she’s opposed to the idea at all (or hasn’t thought about it) and she averts her gaze, clearing almost shyly to rid herself of the feeling of tingles and warmth suddenly spreading up her spine, the back of her neck and eventually her cheeks upon noticing Joohyun’s mysterious, tiny growing smirk at the corner of her lips and eyes glued to her, shining in light amusement and anticipation. 

 

“I-if you want”, she says quietly after a second, breath coming in sharp little gasps, tentatively looking back at her with a small, shy smile and an almost imperceptible half shrug. She holds her breath and nervously studies the older her expression, who only holds her gaze more steadily if anything. Curious and patient, beautiful, smiling sweetly and she seems to understand that it wasn’t supposed to sound or look too hopeful. Seungwan would never even think of doing something that would make Joohyun uncomfortable. She could wine and dine Joohyun forever, though she’d be lying if she said she didn’t secretly hope that won’t be all. 

 

Because Seungwan already feels impossibly lightheaded just thinking about Joohyun walking around in her space and fitting there quite effortlessly. She has thought about it once or twice… Joohyun on her couch with her feet tucked under her as she reads a book, completely stretched out or curled up when she takes a nap there and she later joins her, her shoes neatly lined up by the front door mixed with her own, and an attractive toothy grin and slow, literally breathtaking, untameable smile a permanent fixture in her life. 

 

She’d like her her around everywhere in every possible way. Wants to know her like no one else does. 

 

She found out last time, and perhaps already had a strong, inexplicable inkling since the first time, that even just the two of them, alone, go so well together. It throws her already dazed brain into a whole new dimension of incomprehensible chaos. 

 

For a second Seungwan marvels at the subtle and soft quirk that forms on the older her lips and the alluring slanting of her head, which could be interpreted in a number of ways but she thinks she has a pretty good grasp by now and deciphers agreement and reassurance somewhere mixed in there. To her it also seems to convey that she’s equally fond and delighted about that idea. 

 

Joohyun is looking at her so gently and warm it’s almost too much to wrap her head around. They’re now just gazing with soft smiles mirroring each other, both comfortable to let the moment settle, understanding and agreement passing between them. And Seungwan is fairly certain that no one has ever looked at her like that because she definitely would have remembered that. She is not used to it and maybe never will and she has a strong feeling that she won’t ever tire of hearing it and that Joohyun wouldn’t let her either. 

 

Joohyun, with a blush of her own rising to her cheeks, decides to leave it open, not feeling the need to explicitly say that she really likes that nor does she really know how to respond to that, honestly. She tries not to be too obviously gleeful about it and draws strength from the way a shy smile graces Seungwan her cheeks, eyes shining and Joohyun twist her lips while shaking her head with a certain affection. 

 

Then, before they can fall into lighter conversation again, they are suddenly interrupted by the waitress coming to stand by their table. 

 

“Hello, are you ready to order?” the young girl asks with a friendly smile. 

 

Not having noticed her approaching before, they share a quick, surprised look and then follow the girl’s line of sight as she motions to the closed menus on their table in explanation and confusion. 

 

The one in front of Seungwan is trapped under her comfortably clasped hands as she unconsciously started leaning a bit forward during their conversation. It’s safe to say that the menus have been severely neglected up to this point. Something about the way Seungwan looks at her makes her feel like they are the only two people right here. Their eyes spend more time watching the other than anything else around them, that’s just white noise. The atmosphere’s intimate between them, like they exist in their own little private, almost indestructible bubble. A space that they create together just for the two of them. She’s glad to know she is not the only one left dazed by their interactions, enough to lose track of time and anything else happening around them, even in a small, bustling establishment. 

 

Seungwan looks back up at the young waitress, instantly apologetic and more than a little flustered. “Oh, I’m so sorry. We haven’t- uh, could you please give us another minute? We’ll have look right now.”

 

Luckily the girl doesn’t seem to mind at all and looks between them before smiling back, polite and maybe a little wider and more genuine than before. “Of course. I’ll be back in a few.”

 

As soon as she has left Seungwan turns her attention back on her again, shrugging sheepishly as if she were the only one that forgot. 

 

“I suppose we have to actually choose something and make her job a little easier, huh?” she says and Joohyun laughs lightly as she picks up her menu, only just now realising she is actually getting pretty hungry. 

 

Seungwan follows her lead whilst absentmindedly registering that she really likes the way she laughs, that easy sound igniting a very pleasant flutter in her and drifting across her skin. She is even more captivated by it when she is the reason behind it. Bemused bright eyes with the absolute prettiest color crinkle and are just visible above her raised hand covering the wide smile with all her teeth on display, other times she’s clapping her hands together loudly but there is always a breathless sort of sound to her laugh that’s like music to her ears. She can’t seem to forget about it and she has found herself wondering what else she can do to hear that. 

 

But she is incredibly aware of the fact that she likes a lot of things about her and likes all these things a lot, too.

 

For a few minutes they sit in silence and after deciding what she wants to order Joohyun leans back in her chair and slowly lowers and closes her menu, then putting it in front of her again and a little to the side so the waitress will be able see that they have actually touched their menus this time. She observes the woman across from her with a warm smile playing on her lips while she patiently waits for her to finish, shamelessly admiring the way she looks as she is still carefully going every single item on there, her brows lowered into a cute frown and lips pursed in concentration. 

 

After a long minute of feeling a pair of eyes on her Seungwan finally breaks. She can’t ignore it any longer and looks up, her pulse immediately jumping when she meets Joohyun her strikingly pretty, dark eyes watching her intently, unblinking. Instead of looking embarrassed that she caught her gazing at her it is almost like she was waiting for it. Like she’s up to something but Seungwan doesn’t know what. 

 

Not yet at least.  

 

“What is it?” she asks curiously, looking deeply into her eyes, searching, as if she will find the answer if she tries hard enough. 

 

She does her absolute best not to but isn’t strong enough to keep her eyes from dropping down to Joohyun her lips right when the older woman her tongue darts out and slips over her bottom lip as she tugs the corner of the bottom one between her teeth. Seungwan her breath hitches. The action feels a lot more deliberate than any other time she’s seen it before. But despite the way it has her stomach pleasantly flip-flopping and heat rising in her cheeks instantly she forces herself to maintain eye contact, her eyes now quickly flicking back up again. 

 

She’s met with the sight of gentle, smiling eyes and a grinning Joohyun and it makes the back of her neck tingle and heart swell. 

 

Without a shadow of a doubt she concludes that Joohyun definitely knows. Anyone would, especially an incredibly intelligent and observant woman like Joohyun. Can’t possibly not with the way she is suddenly all red and (more of) a mess. She silently curses herself for being so easily flustered and maybe wants to cover her face with her hands. She almost does but when her brain catches up to the present and she realises she is apparently allowed, maybe even encouraged to watch a second later, she’s too preoccupied with trying to make her body remember how to breathe normally. How to act like a person. 

 

The impossibly playful, determined glint in Joohyun’s bright eyes betray her before she even opens to explain herself. 

 

Joohyun hums thoughtfully, her lips curling into a slow smirk. “I was just wondering if you need help choosing again?” she whispers with a teasing tone, tongue poking out between her teeth. A tiny crooked, amused smile takes over her face when Seungwan breathes out a nervous laugh, her eyes a widening slightly and blinking rapidly as her eyebrows raise themselves in surprise.

 

“No I- uh…”, Seungwan clears , squaring her shoulders as she takes a shaky breath for confidence. “I know what I like this time. What I want.” 

 

Seungwan hadn’t meant or anticipated it to sound even remotely flirty coming out of but with Joohyun looking at her expectantly and amused she apparently couldn’t help it. Her stomach feels as if she were riding a roller coaster, making her stomach turn over on itself with the pair of big shimmering eyes trying to seek out all her hidden secrets that seem to reveal themselves to her one by one extremely willingly. Not that she really minds because she has a feeling they will be in very safe, small hands.

 

One of her favourite looks, the trademark lopsided grin, takes over Joohyun her face at her response and it has her heart skipping a beat, the crackling tension instantaneously thick(er) in the air around them. 

 

“Is that right?” Joohyun asks approvingly, feigning a calmness that’s furthest from anything she’s feeling at the moment. Even when everything around them seems to start spinning on its axis and her heart hammers against her ribs erratically she lets the feeling wash over her. She has a very strong feeling that Seungwan wasn’t just talking about her choice of food. 

 

Seungwan catches herself watching the perfect arch of the other her brow in anticipation, waiting for the slight raise, a little twitch she knows is coming sooner or later. And it does, Joohyun’s right eyebrow lifts then settles back down and Seungwan loves that on her so much it almost has her melting right on the spot. She comes up with nothing as she wracks her brain. There’s no clever comeback or witty remark left so she can only nod meekly, attempting to gather her thoughts. She also does not quite trust herself to do anything other than keep looking at her, kind eyes firmly locked onto hers, and sincerely hopes that her heartbeat isn’t as loud as she thinks it is and clearly noticeable across the table.

 

But even if she does, she can see no harm in that. Actually, she kind of really likes the idea of Joohyun knowing exactly the effect she has on her and how much she likes it. If she doesn’t already know, that is.

 

Something in Joohyun her smirk shifts then and before she even fully realises it herself her eyes glance down, looking Seungwan up and down slowly, fully taking her in once more before settling and focusing on her eyes again. Gentle but mysterious and somehow also decided. 

 

“You should tell me about them sometime”, she tells her, low voice incredibly smooth and with a slightly suggestive lilt to it, a little provocative perhaps. Joohyun herself is blushing furiously now too, also very much not unaffected. Actually quite nervous right now. 

 

Discreetly, she pinches the skin on the back of her hand, checking if this is all really happening or just a very vivid daydream her brain has come up with. She doesn’t know where it is coming from, surprising even herself with how easily she says this all, but goes with it anyway. It’s undoubtably less subtle this time, their flirting, but she’s never been more sure and sincere. A bit more direct but still incredibly honest. She would very much like to get to know everything about her. There’s nothing she would like more at the moment. 

 

And she thinks she is allowed to feel a little smug about the way Seungwan looks right now sitting across from her. It has her buzzing from head to toe. 

 

Seungwan ducks her head for a moment, keeps quiet and tries to even out her breathing, willing her thoughts to calm down. There is a fascinating drop of candle wax on the table she hasn’t noticed before, right in the middle where the long candle used to be before Joohyun moved it to the side earlier, now giving them an unobstructed view of the other. 

 

The older can swing from teasing to throwing her whole self into a moment and it elicits a frantic spark in Seungwan her veins.

 

She tries to stop her blush from spreading even further and bites back a wide smile that she feels is threatening to split open her face. She doesn’t mind being teased, per se. With Joohyun there’s absolutely no malice behind her words but rather it is more about drawing out a reaction from her, she guesses. As if that will give her a piece of a puzzle she is slowly mapping out. Every intricacy and intention that she is learning and discovering before memorising it with the greatest attention to detail. With fierce but gentle sincerity.

 

The older woman seems to find an unusual sense of joy in it when she receives the reaction she desires and she articulates everything in such a way that there’s a flirtatious undertone and the teasing quality of her smile is almost too much and designed to make her blush uncontrollably. And Joohyun doesn’t mind being teased right back either which keeps their (flirty) banter going on indefinitely. There’s never a dull moment between them and they thrive on it.  

 

Seungwan chances a quick glance upwards and blood surges to her cheeks again as Joohyun has the audacity to just smile at her, undoing any and all progress she made to reign that in just a second ago. It’s becoming somewhat of a permanent condition in the presence of the older woman. 

 

It doesn’t seem fair, the way Joohyun seems mostly relaxed and at ease with all this. Mostly being the key word here because the darker tinted shell of her ear and slightly pink cheeks are hard to miss. 

 

It’s a disarmingly slow smile, characteristically Joohyun, that grows on her face and starts with only one half of her face, the soft curve of her lip quirking upwards and then the other side of her face joins in a split-second later, turning it into a full-face effort, reaching all the way up to her eyes. It’s slightly lopsided and utterly gorgeous. Far too attractive and endearing, and she holds her breath involuntarily, too entranced to remember how to multitask. 

 

The fact that she’s not even really trying is even more intoxicating and perplexing. She makes her heart stutter in her chest and her stomach do funny things by just sitting across from her and being herself. Seungwan is fairly certain that if she had to describe it as anything they would be butterflies. 

 

Ones that reproduce particularly fast, almost exponentially when she is with Joohyun. 

 

Unconsciously she starts smiling as well, unable to fight it down, and when she (somewhat) successfully finds her composure again she chuckles softly under her breath. “I do remember saying you should start learning”, she remarks, smiling lazily at the memory despite herself. 

 

Joohyun remember as well, clearly. 

 

Usually Seungwan particularly dislikes when people try and make decisions for her. But not with a slightly shocked, nervous Joohyun approaching it like it was the greatest responsibility she could have given her. She seemed very happy and enthusiastic but also careful as she thought about it meticulously and took everything into consideration with her in mind. And still she did not really decide with a finality but rather offered a suggestion, still asking for her input in the end and her agreement with what she was thinking of because she still wants her to choose to her own comfort. Joohyun wants to learn. Doesn’t want to decide for her but with her. 

 

They hold each others gaze silently, looking deeply into their eyes whilst softly smiling like fools, no words necessary between them right now as so often is the case. But after a while Joohyun averts her gaze shyly, absolutely needs to because she feels like she might spontaneously combust or do something completely irrational if they look at each other much longer that unabashedly and unwavering. The air fizzles and the stare is a bit too intense to be had right here, in a room full of people. Her eyes fixed with such intensity, reflecting her own, makes her stomach bottom out and she hopes, hopes with all her might that she is not the only one slowly going a little bit out of her mind like this. 

 

Honestly, she thought she had been doing a decent enough job with finding her footing when she looked away shortly but now that she looks back at her she finds herself getting distracted again almost immediately, even when Seungwan isn’t doing anything in particular. It’s easier to remember the number of pi than how many times she has zoned out admiring the other woman. Her eyes skim over the rest of Seungwan her face, taking in the tiny details like her moles, the shape of her nose, length of her eyelashes and curve of her lips, when she suddenly catches sight of the waitress approach them again from her periphery. 

 

Joohyun turns her head towards the girl now coming to them again slowly and keeps her eyes put a little longer, still glancing at the younger from the corner of eye, both unable and unwilling to break it off abruptly. She flashes her a minuscule, blink-and-you’ll-miss-it smile before fully turning her attention to the waitress for real, only tearing her eyes away from Seungwan at the last possible moment, the twinkle in her eye never fading.

 

In turn, now it’s Seungwan who has a pleased grin pulling at her lips and glint in her eyes and she doesn’t even make a show of trying to look away. A shiver runs up Joohyun her spine at that and her skin feels warm and practically hums under the attention as she tries to focus on the —normally quite easy— task at hand to the best of her current, slightly debilitated state.

 

They end up ordering their drinks and two different dishes of pasta and Joohyun tries not to get lost in thought again as she looks at the elegant curve of Seungwan her nose when she looks sideways to talk to the waitress, the shape of her profile against the soft light and the shadows dipping over her expression as she tells her the decision she (eventually) made. 

 

And Seungwan is very generous with her thank-yous and polite to a fault, even when another waiter later accidentally brings her the wrong drink while they are in the middle of discussing a movie Seungwan mentioned she wanted to watch over the weekend.  

 

After, they easily fall into other conversations again, happy to put the earlier topic to the side naturally and let whatever might begin to brew temporarily simmer down. —If at all possible in the first place—. They talk about their common interests for a bit while they wait for their food to be prepared, bantering and joking lightly as they sip their respective drinks and comfortably talk and discuss about the books they’re currently reading or listening to, music, food, sports and letting their conversation flow freely towards anything else they want to talk about. Nothing seems too trivial, or too deep for that matter.

 

Captivated, Joohyun watches Seungwan her smile grow wider as she talks, her own heart now beating only in a slightly more safe tempo —at least more sustainable for the duration of their date—. Nonetheless, it feels exhilarating that both of them also take an interest in the small things in each other’s life, the things people usually overlook or simply don’t really care too much about, and pick their brain without inhibition. 

 

It strikes her again how often Seungwan smiles, and without reservation. She has her quirks, like way her cheeks puff up when she smiles, the slight happy crinkle of her eyes and nose, it is sometimes a little silly but always blinding and like sunshine. Honestly it has her a little awe-struck. The sound, low and comfortable drifts across her skin featherlight and something flutters inside her chest, like a kaleidoscope of heavy butterflies making their presence known. 

 

Joohyun can’t help but look at her affectionately, her expression softening more and more the longer she talks. She hasn’t taken her eyes off her for a while now and if Seungwan minded she didn’t show it. Contrarily, she flashes her a charming smile, wide and brilliant, kind eyes in the prettiest shade of brown she has ever seen shining softly and the back of her neck immediately tingles as a surge of warmth ripples through her. She likes the way Seungwan makes her feel when those eyes linger on her. 

 

She closes her eyes briefly to pull herself together as much as possible and then forces herself to take a long sip of her drink as she is most definitely not thinking of grabbing her hands from where they are waving in the air as she continues explaining and even less about literally losing herself in the depths of her eyes and kiss that maddeningly attractive expression right off her beautiful face. 

 

As she peers at her over the rim of her glass, Seungwan clears softly, letting her know she’s caught her staring. She swallows the lump in , suddenly a bit more nervous. As well-acquainted as she has let herself become with every single one of Seungwan her expressions and mannerisms, the other has been paying a lot of attention too. 

 

It’s a little later when their food has already arrived and they are in the middle of a deeper conversation, talking back and forth with Joohyun now sharing about her family and fondly describing a camping place near her hometown that she took her sister to for a weekend a while back when Joohyun thought a change of scenery and going out would be particularly good for her, with a long hiking trail that’s not too difficult and the most amazing and rewarding view at the top, when Seungwan, somewhere along the way, loses track just a little bit. Not because she’s not interested. No, she has her full undivided attention, she is genuinely curious and has a desire to know everything and understand, and really tries to focus on her words but the way she talks so fondly about the memory and flashes the biggest smile, beaming and perfect, is quite literally breathtaking and incredibly distracting. She could sit here for hours, just watching and trying not to get lost in the prettiest, warm eyes that twinkle extra beautifully as they reflect the lights around them. 

 

Her eyes dart over her flawless face freely as she nods along earnestly, her gaze dropping to follow the line of her neck and now fixed on watching the flex of as she down her own neck when she talks, with a million thoughts and memories of her own behind those big eyes.

 

There’s not just one thing that captivates her but everything. Joohyun is an undeniably attractive woman but she is not just gorgeous, but also kind, funny, thoughtful and smart. She has a good head on her shoulders —in more ways than one— and it is a powerful, if dangerous, combination. But it is something she intends to appreciate and cherish. If allowed.

 

In the middle of Joohyun talking lightly about some kind of heating blanket situation absolutely required for her survival during cold camping nights and a time her sister struggled with not burning their entire dinner, Seungwan sighs softly before she can stop herself, not really fully thinking. 

 

“How are you so amazing?” she breathes out in a wondrous tone with the most gentle smile gracing her face. 

 

Joohyun stops talking abruptly, incredibly surprised by the interruption and she looks back at the younger slightly puzzled as she is left wondering what she did. 

 

“Oh, I-I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to talk over you just like that. Please continue.”

 

Actually, her mind kind of short circuited the moment she registered the other her words and she already forgot the whole point she was trying to make. Instead of being annoyed or offended by the interruption, somewhere in the back of her mind she hears a thundering voice say ‘screw the other conversation, you continue’. She’s infinitely more interested in finding out exactly what Seungwan her thoughts are right now. Her heart seems to skip a beat, her cheeks blushing ever so slightly in anticipation and she attempts to swallow down the nerves rising in her chest. 

 

She raises her shoulders in a half-shrug and sends her a small reassuring smile. “I’m pretty normal, really.”

 

Seungwan shakes her head lightly, not willing to believe it even for a second. All the things she has learned about her and seen up till now severely contradict that. Then something Joohyun can’t quite decipher flashes by in her eyes before there’s a subtle shift in her gaze as she seems to contemplate, lips attractively curving upwards as her smile slowly grows. “No, I think you are anything but normal, Joohyun.”

 

She is pleasantly surprised to find that Seungwan seems to have decided that she won’t feel like holding back at any point today. Exactly that and the honesty in her eyes leaves her breathless, vulnerable and at the mercy of her feelings that run far too deeply already for the short time they’ve known each other. And the other doesn’t know how it makes her feel when she looks at her like that. Part of her is constantly reassured when Seungwan speaks like this, she feels validated and recognised for what she does and who she is just by Seungwan watching her and really listening, so patient and calming.

 

While her insides jump she tilts her head and narrows her eyes playfully, deciding to have a little bit of fun. “Are you calling me weird, Seungwan?” she asks, eyebrows raised in question and the corner of her lips curved up in amusement. “Tsk, did we really go from you complimenting me to calling me weird?” she jokes lightly, daring her to disagree.

 

Immediately Seungwan grins innocently. “Not weird, just…-I mean we’re all a little weird in our own way, right? And that is not a bad thing either I think, I actually quite like it. Also, I would say you’re wonderfully weird in my book and that still counts as a compliment. Or it’s meant that way anyway.”

 

She rolls her eyes, feeling herself start to blush a little at the others words, and locks eyes with her again. If it’s still a compliment… “Well, then I can only say that I’m flattered it took you this long to figure out my… weirdness”, she replies.

 

Seungwan chuckles heartily, clearly not having expected such a response at all, and she regards her mischievously right after, throwing a wink at her. “You hide it well.”

 

Joohyun smiles softly. She appreciates a bit of cheekiness and wit and she’s becoming more and more sure of the fact that those two things, amongst others, have somehow perfectly come together in the woman in front of her, who instantly and effortlessly matches and maintains her banter and energy. Like it’s just that easy. 

 

There’s just one thing that she think Seungwan got wrong. Something she disagrees with a little and she wants to make sure that Seungwan really knows that because she is definitely not like this with just anybody. 

 

Only people she is really into. 

 

If she’s incredibly honest to herself it might as well be referred to as just a Seungwan-thing now. Because this hasn’t really happened ever before.

 

She shakes her head shyly, nervous but also determined as she regards the other woman carefully and leans forward, feeling a buzzing through her veins. “That’s only because I’m not trying to hide”, she explains softly. For once I’m not, she wants to add, not with you. But that would probably be too much, she gathers. 

 

Seungwan blinks, her breath caught in and her already flushed cheeks turning a shade darker. Seemingly almost fearless, sweet Joohyun gently but boldly barges through with little regard for the way it feels like an attack on her feelings and composure in the best possible way she could imagine. And she tries to suppress it to the best of her attempts but her smile grows so much wider, unconsciously mirroring Joohyun’s in understanding, in acknowledgement. 

 

She mulls over her words for a few seconds and then clears , looking at her intently. “So, I guess with that logic I also kinda stick out.”

 

“You,” Joohyun begins lazily, drawing the moment out with a warm smile playing on her lips when she notices Seungwan following her movements with fascination as she reaches over her plate and grabs the base of her glass. Already softly grinning to herself she meets the other her gaze slowly again, eyes twinkling as she shamelessly lets her eyes roam her face, leaning in just slightly, Seungwan her expression increasingly more curious as to what she will say. “You would stick out anywhere.”

 

“I-I would?” Seungwan asks with a tilt of her head, slightly confused as she didn’t really expect a response to that.

 

She shrugs and nods almost at the same time, her tongue poking out from behind her teeth in badly contained amusement. “Yeah, you’re far, far too cute to go unnoticed.” 

 

When Seungwan looks taken aback and a little flustered she feels particularly proud of the comment. She hasn’t ever seen something more satisfying than this reaction.

 

Seungwan rolls her eyes half-heartedly, feeling herself redden more by the second, her face suddenly much warmer than before and pulse speeding up immediately. She doesn’t think she will ever get tired of, or be prepared for, Joohyun saying she think she is cute. Giddily, she bites her lip and swallows thickly when a shy smile takes over her face, the corners of her lips curving up towards her ears. “This feels like deja vu.”

 

The amused smirk on Joohyun her face softens and she remembers their conversation, or rather discussion about who was cuter, from last time. “I’m allowed to think you’re cute, you know”, she continues gently with a soft tilt of her head to her shoulder, deliberately keeping her eyes locked firmly onto the other’s kind brown ones.

 

Oh, but you would be allowed a lot of things if you ask.

 

Her own unbidden (thankfully unvoiced) thoughts cause Seungwan to stiffen, her eyes widen, eyebrows shoot up and she forgets how to breathe. She blushes furiously, going through every single shade of the pink and red section in a paint color wheel in the span of a split second, and a shiver runs up her spine. For one, she’s extremely glad she is not immediately descending into making squeaky noises and somehow is able to will enough control to clench her teeth together to keep those exact words from being out in the open. Sparks seem to be flying between them today and her self-control is being tested like never before.

 

“O-of course.”

 

The pleased glint in Joohyun her slightly scrunched, hypnotising eyes makes the tingling in her stomach even more insistent. 

 

The fact that there are no mixed signals, only varying intensities, is incredible. Both of them are seemingly long past the point of pretending they both don’t know how much they like this. How good this feels.

 

The reason? The romantic feelings are very much mutual. 

 

Everything leaves them wanting more of each other. 

 

Seungwan gets a little lost in her thoughts for a moment, preoccupied with taking in the incredibly distracting sight in front of her, and barely registers the other carefully shifting in her seat. Only when their feet bump together, grazes her calf almost featherlight under the table and Joohyun mutters a soft ‘sorry’ under her breath does she break out of her daze, the jolt passing through her very effective in clearing the fog in her mind. She blinks rapidly trying to refocus and understand what happened exactly but she’s not entirely convinced it wasn’t a purposeful brush of Joohyun her foot against her crossed legs. Whether it was just to get her attention or she had another motif though….

 

The touch seems a bit light to be only accidental and the ghost of a nervous smile pulling at Joohyun her lips, like a secret only for her to know, paired with her eyes turning into crescents, is all a little too innocent to be anything other than deliberate, yet still soft and tentative. Testing the waters.

 

But neither truly acknowledges what just happened except for the resurfaced blushes and shy, knowing grins they continuously and silently exchange before they continue again. 

 

For the rest of their meal they mostly talk about much safer topics, though the heat of Joohyun her gaze still washes over Seungwan her skin every few seconds. After some time Seungwan leans back in her chair and bunches up her sleeves before crossing her arms, pale, toned forearms poking out, and Joohyun chuckles because she looks about two seconds away from rolling out of it and onto the floor after almost devouring the pasta she ordered. 

 

Earlier Joohyun had ordered tea and she is still nursing the now lukewarm drink while Seungwan just finished hers. The tea came in the cutest little teapot, handmade and very unique, something Joohyun has always liked and she takes a moment to admire the handiwork. In the comfortable silence that overtakes them as she takes a slow sip, her eye falls on the tag of the teabag dangling out from the top, something tiny scribbled on it. Intrigued, she sets her cup down slowly and reaches out to turn it over, reading aloud what it says. 

 

“What is a mundane, everyday thing you do that makes you happy?”

 

Seungwan opens her eyes and sits up straight, bringing her attention back to the other after looking just a little blissed out after the meal. And with the company, obviously. “Hmm?”

 

“Here”, she tells her, showing Seungwan the little paper attached to the string that disappears into the teapot. “It says, ‘what’s a mundane, everyday thing you do that makes you happy’?”

 

“Ah, that’s actually a good question.”

 

She nods her head in agreement. “Yeah, I think it’s supposed to be something like a conversation starter.”

 

Seungwan smiles softly, eyes twinkling. “I don’t think we have gotten through all conversation topics quite yet, do you?”

 

The corners of her lips curve upwards in an amused, playful smile and she firmly holds Seungwan her gaze. “No.” Not even close.

 

“But I am kind of curious now. What’s your answer?”

 

“You want me to say just one thing?”

 

“Doesn’t really matter. However many there are.”

 

She contemplates this for a minute and goes through a typical day in her mind quickly while Seungwan stares at her, softly observing while she waits patiently for her to share. “I have something”, she starts and the other is immediately all ears, nodding for her to continue. “So, I ehh, do this thing where I try to look up at the sky several times a day and just appreciate the casual beauty of it. It’s very calming and nice to slow down whatever I’m doing for a minute and have a moment to myself and reflect. Just a few quick glances throughout the day but mostly in the morning and at night I watch from my window at home. And then I look down at the bustling city going fast and strong and strangers walking about, in their own little world with their own worries and ambitions, living their own lives. I don’t know… it’s just very healing to me and makes me calm and happy for some reason.”

 

For as long as she can remember Joohyun has loved looking at the sky, both the collection of drawings she made as a child in her parents attic and the gallery of her phone is evidence of this. Even though it is a comforting constant, it is also never the same, perpetually changing. Subconsciously or not, and no matter where she is or what time, she finds herself looking up and admiring the way the patterns change and clouds look strikingly white and soft and fluffy against a bright blue summer sky or like little patches of grey on an overcast, rainy day. The sky has different moods just like people.

 

Over the years she has gotten into somewhat of a routine where she gets home and draws the curtains and cocoons herself in her own safe space, letting herself get lost in thought for just a little while. To simply let the stress of the day slide off her and relax while she enjoys the view.

 

Of course, the sunrise and sunset is the most visually striking. The soft glow of the lowering or rising sun on the horizon painting the sky a gradient of brilliant colours, blossoming pinks and red-orange dancing harmoniously across the sky, never fails to leave her in awe. But she’s not always able to catch it and she really doesn’t mind any version of the sky. Even on grey days, from inside, the sound of rain against the glass is strangely soothing and she watches the view get slightly distorted, turning into a blur, as the drops slide down the pane of glass. Secretly she roots for one of the droplets to get to the bottom fastest and feels strangely excited when she was right. 

 

Across from her, Seungwan just looks at her, enthralled. Joohyun is being too precious and it takes her breath away a little bit and she has to stop herself from genuinely smiling like crazy. “That sounds really nice, Joohyun.” 

 

She sends her a small smile. “I think I would also put my daily weather-chat with my neighbour and sleeping on the list because it’s just a nice feeling. And, well, maybe not every day, but I like to write down my thoughts too”, she adds a moment later, lowering her gaze, suddenly a little shy and self-conscious at giving Seungwan a very honest glimpse into her everyday mind. The simple things she appreciates. 

 

“Now, what about you?” Joohyun asks with a half-smile, a light blush rising on her cheeks, diverting the attention. 

 

“Well, I just realised I should look at the sky a little more often. Like really look at it. I mean, I don’t have a window in my office so I can’t actually loo-”

 

“You don’t have a window?” she interjects softly, a little quizzically, her brown eyes locked with Seungwan’s softening in their expression.

 

“Oh no, not right now I’m afraid.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“I got the last available space and it’s practically in the middle of the building so it is just artificial lighting for me at the moment. I think in a couple months there might be a space opening up.”

 

Joohyun her brows furrow, a little concerned for her. “But you need sunlight, Seungwan-ah.”

 

Seungwan chuckles lightly and Joohyun watches the smile split across her face, lips stretching into a wide smile that lights up her entire face. “I’m rarely inside the whole working day though. I walk around and talk to people at their desk so I catch some rays of sunlight. And I usually go outside during the lunch break and go for a short walk. There’s this little park nearby and a couple blocks away there’s the arboretum and I just go there and sit and look around, get some fresh air and listen to some music. Honestly, it’s a very nice sort of routine.”

 

She doesn’t exactly know why but hearing that makes Joohyun feel a lot better.

 

“So yeah for me, I’ve realised walking to places makes me quite happy, especially if I’m getting rained on. But that’s only if I’m going home”, she clarifies quickly, smiling cheekily. “And another thing that makes me happy would be making at least one person smile and, ehh… okay this may sound really weird, and to be honest I don’t know why I am thinking of this right now instead of anything else but I guess I just really like the moment after I’ve brushed my teeth? It’s just- so clean and nice and it feels like I can literally do anything. Is that just me or…?” Seungwan drifts off, uncertain and finishing with an adorable slanting of her head, a little goofy and embarrassed at her own words. Joohyun almost has half a mind to reach out and cradle her face gently in an affectionate manner because she is kind of a whole lot mesmerised by the sight and cuteness of it it.

 

Moments before Joohyun was still attentively following every single word Seungwan was saying, committing it to memory but now she snorts out a small sincere laugh, a low, breathless chuckle escaping . Her lips curl into a lopsided grin, eyes crinkling and nose scrunched up, and Seungwan joins in on her laughter a second later, also amused by her own peculiar thought process that’s being revealed. 

 

“I am not going to lie to you, that is a little weird and unexpected”, she admits when she catches her breath again, now smiling warmly. “But I guess I understand the sentiment to some extend.”

 

At that Seungwan grins slowly and it’s so pretty that Joohyun can feel the tingles spread along her spine and she tucks her thumb into her fist, squeezing as if to remind herself that this is all really happening and to ground herself, to maintain at least some sort of composure.

 

After a few seconds of silence she clears , getting their conversation back on track before she can get lost in her eyes again. “So do you usually have lunch around the same time then? If you want to go out for a walk as well, I mean that seems like a good way to break up the day”, she says nonchalantly, thinking of possible future opportunities to spend time together. Their workplaces are not that far away from each other anyway —she would also just drive over if needed, but you know that’s besides the point—, and she wonders if that little habit is something just for her alone or she wouldn’t mind company sometimes. Perhaps starting in the very near future. 

 

“Ah, that, well I try to but it really depends on how the day is going and what it’s like outside, honestly. I don’t always have the pleasure of eating lunch at a normal hour but I try to get better at it. Have been sort of instructed by first Sooyoung to take more care of myself in a rather threatening manner, actually.” She laughs lightly. “But sometimes things just come in between or I forget the time and then it’s already late and my stomach will protest so I just settle for a really quick break. What about you?”

 

“Yeah, it’s roughly the same for me. This week has just been a bit busy, with having to catch up with things left unattended from last week and all so I thought I would multitask and plan some lunch meetings with people so they can fill me in on what they’ve been doing.” She perks up. “But the good thing is that I make my own schedule so I can take my lunch break whenever I want or can basically. Which is a huge plus.”

 

The younger nods thoughtfully, slowly. “It sounds like you enjoy being in charge”, she inquires boldly, her voice low but tone rather casual. Then, as if Seungwan only just realised what exactly she said, the ever-present, alluring shine in her eye intensifies, turns into a more playful, darker glint a second later as Joohyun almost chokes on the last sip of her tea, completely caught off guard with the dangerous innuendo. 

 

Joohyun her brain temporarily short circuits and her ears go hot at the thought, suddenly very dry as she tries to focus on something, literally anything other than the devilish upturn of the other her lips as she breaks out into a mildly amused, flirtatious smile. Her already sharp, singular focus on the woman in front of her becomes even more pronounced, as if the air gets out of the room just a little bit. She loves witnessing Seungwan becoming bolder and braver, see the growing confidence and resolve 

as it unfolds before her eyes. That she gets to witness that —or is the reason behind it— makes her heart, which to be fair was already beating faster than her usual, pick up a dangerous stuttering pace. 

 

An innocent grin flashes across Seungwan her face but she knows better than to be fooled by it, especially with the way her blush and lip bite give away her nerves. Sweet, kind Seungwan can be surprisingly bold when she wants to be it turns out. Like layers are peeling away, surprising and impressing her at every corner today. But it’s also not entirely new or unforeseen. It’s been there, in the way she says things, behaves and looks at her, and she liked to think she was better prepared than this.

 

Perhaps the reason is that Seungwan is making quick strides in her commitment to finding out exactly what makes her tick and makes her head spin. She’s gaining momentum, takes to it like a duck to water and is visibly more comfortable and confident. She is a little too overwhelmingly charming and does an almost terrifyingly good job at shaking Joohyun her (previously perceived) strong balance. 

 

Especially now that they’ve seemingly both decided to largely abandon the fear of coming on too strong. 

 

And it’s not untrue what she said. In most situations she is glad to be in charge —in control, to be guiding things in the right direction. She’s good at it, gives her a reassuring stability and it usually comes naturally to her. Control is a peculiar thing really, because it can be smeared into blurry lines and given to someone else with trust, love and vulnerability. And something about the idea of Seungwan in charge unravels something within her, sends a warm, fuzzy feeling through her stomach.

 

Seungwan watches her from across the table and her heart soars at the rosy color on her cheeks and kind eyes looking at her maybe a little astonished, a little less calm than usual. She’s particularly proud of herself for also being able to elicit such reactions from her. It’s a good balance between them. And even though she said it herself, the nerves still bounce around in her stomach like a pinball machine and she can barely feel the warmth of her cheeks anymore because it has been so consistent since they have started this. Whatever it is. All that it is. 

 

Seungwan stares at Joohyun, daring her to continue —with words, not just looks—, with a minuscule dazzling grin playing on her lips and the older quickly clears , ducking her head to buy herself some time. “I-yeah, I’m good at it… I think. It’s kind of required for the job too”, she says then. Her voice, despite the slight tremble in the beginning, is much steadier than anything she thought herself capable of producing at this specific moment. A small, less shy smirk pulls at her lips as she adds, “That doesn’t mean I cannot or won’t let it go though.” For the right person, she doesn’t say but it seems clear that the message came across from the way the younger bites back a smile.

 

Now it’s the younger’s turn to smile shyly, twisting her fingers and focusing on the brown, gentle eyes across from her. “I think we’d work well together on a project”, she mumbles softly, only for Joohyun to hear.

 

Uh-huh, a project… that too.

 

A happy and long-standing ‘collaboration'. 

 

 

 

…..

 

 

 

 

 

When it is getting particularly late and they’ve long finished their dinner and it becomes increasingly clear that other people are slowly leaving the restaurant to head home they decide that it might be wise to do the same. The lovely waitress comes by again to hand them the bill and Joohyun quickly moves into action, reaches across the table and places her hand on it to claim it as soon as it is put, rather thoughtfully she might add, right in the middle of the table, before Seungwan can even think of getting any other ideas in her mind. 

 

“Wait, let me-”, Seungwan her protest starts as she registers what Joohyun is doing. 

 

“I’ll pay”, she says before the other can continue, smiling reassuringly, a tender certainty to her voice. “I want to and I asked you out so…”

 

Seungwan furrows her brows and shakes her head, clearly disagreeing. “Eh, I asked you too! May I remind you that I was going to ask first? Plus I suggested this place.”

 

Joohyun listens and smiles mischievously, eyebrows raised in emphasis and eyes twinkling as she nods in agreement. “See? You have already done a lot so let me, please.”

 

“That’s not- I mean-…. Joohyun.” 

 

The soft, almost whine of her name in combination with the flash of a pout and helpless puppy eyes are almost enough to make her give in. Almost. If only she weren’t so damn determined. “Don’t make me play the unnie card”, she warns teasingly, eyeing the other with a smile pulling at her lips. However much the bill might be, it is without a doubt worth it. The money, the time, the energy… everything.

 

Seungwan opens and closes trying to retort and come up with something to say to that and Joohyun watches her closely in anticipation, as if daring her to continue and smiling gently in that way she does when she thinks Seungwan is being cute.

 

“That’s not fair. You told me that I could call you Joohyun”, the younger eventually says softly, her bottom lip jutting out and hypnotising eyes a little pleading in a last effort to deter her. It is almost said too softly because Joohyun barely catches the first half of her name as she breathes it out but the simple idea of a nickname —or a pet-name— from Seungwan for her makes her head spin a bit and leaves her a little dazed. That’s new. And definitely something they’ll have to talk about. In due time, that is. 

 

She shakes her head and takes a shallow, steadying breath, forcing that thought to the far, far back of her mind for now, ready to marvel at when she gets home. “Doesn’t mean I’m not an unnie to you”, she says instead with a slight blush.

 

Seungwan locks eyes with her, searches for something, contemplates it for a second and then seems to decide to let it go as she sighs defeatedly and a slow smile grows and blooms on her face. “Then it’s my turn next time alright?”

 

With an accomplished, happy smile of her own she nods in agreement, trying not to seem too eager at the thought of next time already, and goes to stand up with a determined glint in her eyes. “Promise”, she adds before Seungwan steps around the table and closer, so much closer than she has been all night, and carefully helps her into her coat. 

 

Remarkably, she doesn’t really flinch when the other her soft, deft fingers brush the back of her neck featherlight, knuckles grazing her skin as she pops up the collar. It does however trigger a sharp intake of breath and makes her shiver lightly, all nerve endings lighting up and a tickling but nonetheless incredible sensation spreading up and down her spine at the brief contact. How her whole body reacts to her. 

 

Her presence, her proximity above all, makes her skin prickle and her stomach flip pleasantly. That was already happening before and it is definitely not helping simmer anything down when this woman, who she is astonishingly attracted to, now helps her with adjusting her clothing. It is thoughtful but also such a strangely intimate thing. But maybe they can’t help it as they’re impossibly drawn to each other, which makes even such a simple thing feel like a lot.

 

Behind fluttering eyelashes she turns her head slowly and looks back at Seungwan over her shoulder, automatically raising an eyebrow, the corner of her lips curving upwards with a mind of their own. 

 

Just as quickly as Seungwan stepped forward she takes a very small step back, flushing and with hot ears, putting at least a little more distance between them when she lock eyes with Joohyun, soft and wondrous. But even then it’s impossible to forget that the distance could so easily be closed and she has to resist the urge to do so as she thinks that she might like to press a light kiss to the older her cheek or behind her ear, keep her own slightly trembling, careful fingers there and trail them along her hairline and the column of her neck lightly, enjoying the feel of smooth skin. But not here. Not now either. 

 

Honestly, her legs feel a little weak and just the thought leaves her a little breathless and flustered. She clears softly and swallows thickly, sending the older a gentle, shy smile as she takes another step back, hoping that will help clear her mind some more and lessen the buzz going through her veins. “Thank you.”

 

Joohyun now fully turns around to face the younger with an easy smile, buttoning up the bottom of her coat and then leans over to grab the check book from their table, just shy of letting her arm brush against Seungwan her fingers. When she leans back she is grinning, wide and warm and sincere, reassuring. “There is really no need to thank me.”

 

With that she takes off to the front of the restaurant, the tingles on her back telling her that Seungwan is following close behind after a second and when she’s done paying they walk outside together. The chill air immediately greets them and they are about two good steps out the door, now no longer protected by the canopy, when the first drop of rain hits Joohyun right in between her eyes. She suddenly remembers something and stops walking abruptly. 

 

“Oh, hold on, I forgot I brought an umbrella” she says, quickly turning around and running back in before the door had even fully closed behind them, leaving a surprised and confused Seungwan standing alone on the sidewalk looking back at her. 

 

She is back out again within 5 seconds, the umbrella-rack conveniently located just next to the front door making it a very quick task, and she is met with the sight of Seungwan looking up at the sky, wondrous and with a smile, her palms, open and facing upwards, collecting drops of water as if she’s just now realising what rain truly is. She falls back into step with Seungwan as she tries to open her umbrella at the same time. “You didn’t bring one?” she asks, looking sideways at her.

 

Seungwan chuckles, eyes crinkling. “Nah, the rain won’t kill me. I’m not made of sugar.”

 

She snorts out a hearty laugh. “Well, neither am I. But I still like to get home dry.”

 

“You could’ve fooled me”, Seungwan says with a shrug. 

 

“Hmm?” She prompts her to explain with a hum of interest, head tilted in eyes focused on incredibly attractive face, eyes skimming over every inch. She doesn’t know why but there is something about the amused curl of her lips, the subtle smirk and shimmer in her eyes —barely there but well… if you almost continuously look at someones face and mannerisms you tend to start noticing things— that makes her feel like she has something up her sleeve.

 

Seungwan chivalrously takes the umbrella from her fumbling hands and unfolds it before holding it up above their heads, shielding them from the rain and the glow from the streetlights now blocked and casting a darker light across Joohyun her face. 

 

“You are for sure sweet enough to be”, Seungwan remarks greasily with the most smug, self-satisfied look she’s ever seen on her that’s too damn attractive. More than it has any right to be. 

 

Instantly her cheeks flush. “Pfff, stop it” she says, punctuating it with a lighthearted roll of her eyes and scrunch of her face in disapproval. Altogether it is not too convincing as she gently shoves her away with her free hand before she tugs her closer under the umbrella with her. 

 

Seungwan just smiles brightly, suppressing a giddy, stupid grin with her nose scrunched in secret amusement and pointedly steers them away from the restaurant and towards the parking area. 

 

Joohyun only has one very strong thought that comes to mind as she revels in the way Seungwan stands closer to her. Which is that every single time she spends with Seungwan just gets better and how she wants to do this again. 

 

And again.

 

And again. 

 

 

 

 

 

** Hi~~

Woooh it's been a while hasn't it? 

I don’t want to sound like a broken record but yes, I definitely didn’t mean to take this long to update again. Sorry for that. My OCD’s been kicking my on this one in particular and I still don’t think this is the best chapter I’ve written but you know… (through slightly gritted teeth) that happens and it’s fine.. 
I’m quite a slow writer because I tend to obsess over the smallest things and my brain works at 100 miles a minute to make sure everything is just right so I am glad/relieved to know that you like the detail and seem to enjoy the long chapters because there’s more where that’s coming from, clearly :P

Anyway, as always I hope you enjoyed this! Let me know your thoughts ;)