Nayeon had a love-hate relationship with time, but now she was definitely feeling the consequences of the force. This morning, she marked off the date and sighed. There was only one week left until the dumb festival-fair-thingy that Jihyo forced her to do. She had fun, sure, but she learned more about herself and her teammates during the past month than she ever wanted to. Nayeon could feel herself changing—one of the only things in the world that unsettled her.

 

Practice was slowly unravelling. Everyday they met in the dance room, someone had a new chip on their shoulder. One day it was Sana’s failed math test, the next it was Jihyo’s angry cat (and by extension, torn jacket). There were many tense situations that Nayeon skirted by with her powers, but not everything could be salvaged. The Nasamoji team was a bomb waiting to go off.

 

Nayeon rounded the corner on her way to the dance room when she heard it.

 

“I still really don’t like Nayeon.”

 

“Momo, I understand, but we have to get the performance out of the way.”

 

“Everytime she speaks—”

 

“I know.”

 

Now, Im Nayeon isn’t a person who crumbles at the slightest bit of criticism. However, the venom dripping from Momo’s voice had struck something deep in her chest, and she was shocked at the warm tears trailing down her cheeks. Hell, Nayeon couldn’t even blame her. Yet, Nayeon developed a new issue soon after. Park Jihyo, Nayeon’s best friend (someone she considers a little sister), was agreeing with Momo. 

 

She racked her brain trying to come up with an answer that didn’t result in Park Jihyo hating Nayeon’s guts. Unfortunately, she came up short.

 

A loud-ish sniffle from the crying girl alerted the two girls in the hallway. Without fail, Nayeon rewound, not giving them the chance to speak.

 

She took one step back from the hallway, and then another. Soon, she was striding down the hallway, viciously wiping her tears. Im Nayeon would rather be dead than caught crying.

 

If she had looked to her left, she would’ve seen Yoo Jeongyeon’s eyes observing her curiously, hiding out of sight. If she had looked a few feet to her right, she would’ve seen Myoui Mina’s concerned eyes peering at her through a nearby classroom.

 

“Did I just see... Im Nayeon...” Mina’s brow was deeply set... “Cry? That’s rare.”

 

The dancer sighed, nodding at the polite teacher as she turned in her exam. With a new A+ in her gradebook, Myoui Mina could feel the pride climb up her chest.

 

Another thing to perfect was coming up, which reminded her that she was 10 minutes late for practice. 

 

Myoui Mina never bragged, even if she felt good about herself, but she had to admit that her team was doing amazing. Son Chaeyoung, although Mina didn’t know her well before the festival, was incredibly talented and down-to-earth. Mina got along well with her too. Kim Dahyun was an extremely hard worker, taking extra time during her study periods to dance like she had no choice. Mina couldn’t say she was surprised. Deep down, she knew the younger girl had a serious respect for her craft, and that led Mina to heavily respect her. The person she may have worried over the most, Chou Tzuyu, was probably the most excited for the project. Mina saw a lot of herself in the younger girl, which may have been why she chose to do the project with her. Tzuyu did have a little bit of trouble in the beginning—Mina would swear up and down that it was just Tzuyu’s nerves. Nonetheless, Tzuyu improved fast. She was naturally talented, and she was excited to show off her skills (even if the public wouldn’t know who she was).

 

The walk was pretty short, and as she opened the practice doors, she was greeted by her team members warming up with laughter and conversation.

 

“Oh come on! No secret kiss snuck in the choreography?” Dahyun jested as she stretched her legs out, leaning out as far as she could.

 

Chaeyoung whined with a dramatic hand on her forehead, “Bro, literally stop!” 

 

Mina glanced between the girls with amused eyes, locking on a quiet Tzuyu in between them. If Mina didn’t know better, she would think that Tzuyu was zoning out. However, there was a certain volition behind Tzuyu’s eyes that she knew all too well.

 

“Unnie, aren’t you just being mean because you have an unreachable crush on Bae Joohyun?”

 

Chaeyoung’s eyes went comically wide, mouth agape with a hand speeding to cover it. Her eyes flew from Dahyun to Tzuyu before settling on Dahyun, waiting for the girl’s response. Mina was waiting too, yet just a little more subtly.

 

“I—” Dahyun spluttered out, face turning more red by the second— “Y-You don’t know anything, Chou Tzuyu.”

 

“So, we aren’t going to talk about what happened during homeco—”

 

“No! No, we are not going to, actually.” Dahyun shouted, interrupting the tall girl.

 

Mina let out a giggle at the sight of the Taiwanese girl’s smug face. These girls were something different. She walked over to the speaker to turn the song up, yet halting as the door flung open and a panicked Momo stumbled into the room with her clothes ruffled.

 

“We have a problem.”

 

Momo never meant for everything to fly off the handle. She couldn’t even remember how it all blew up. She recollected her memories the best she could as she started speaking to Mina.

 

“Jihyo, you don’t know. You don’t get it. Everytime I look at her, or hear her speak... It just—”

 

“It’s okay, Momo,” Jihyo leaned in to get closer, rubbing her back, “You don’t have to explain.”

 

“No, I want to. I need to get this off my chest.”

 

Momo took a deep breath, getting ready to spill her feelings, “Last year. It was in Chemistry. Nayeon had a bad day, I-I guess. She had stormed into the class with a murderous look on her face. Anyway, I was vibing, sitting next to Jungeun, when we started a lab experiment. It was just supposed to be a simple Acid and Base test, using the little strips that tell you what it is. I wasn’t paying attention and I spilt some—I think it was bleach? It got everywhere. It was on her jacket and pants as well as mine. Then—”

 

Momo swallowed, trying to supress the warm tears pooling in her eyes. After some sweet whispers from Jihyo, who told her to continue, Momo let the first one fall.

 

“She blew up. I didn’t know what was going on at first, but she was so angry. She ridiculed me, Jihyo. I was so embarrassed. She was waving her arms everywhere ranting so loudly about how stupid I was. Do you know how hard it was to hold in my tears? The teacher excused us to the bathroom to try and wash it off, but I didn’t go. I just left the campus and walked home.” 

 

Momo was sobbing, regretting ever bringing it up. Jihyo took in a deep breath, trying to stop her own tears from springing.

 

“That’s horrible, Momo, I am so sorry that happened. Nayeon is—well, she definitely has her bad days. It’s no excuse, but I don’t think she would do that today, if you catch my drift. I wouldn’t expect an apology, though. Nayeon never apologizes for anything. That’s just how it is.”

 

“If she was so ing mature she would apologize to me. I’d probably forgive her. I understand that people change. She saved me and Jeongyeon the other day, did you know that?”

 

“No, I didn’t hear about that.”

 

“That’s my point! She has matured. The normal Nayeon would have preached to the world that she saved people from bullies. That’s why I’m so hurt! If she’s so mature, then does that mean she forgot? It’s awful that something that means so much to you can be a buffering memory to someone else. It’s so awful.”

 

“I understand, Momo.”

 

The two girls sat in silence, leaning against the practice room door as they took in the weight of the conversation. They sprang up, however, when Yoo Jeongyeon rounded the corner, seemingly distracted with the tag on her book bag. She looked up, noticing the tired looks on her friend’s faces.

 

“Woah, are you guys alright?”

 

“We’re out of towels, Yoo Jeongyeon. Would you mind getting some spares from the locker room?”

 

Yoo Jeongyeon, in all her perception, knew that they needed to talk about something in private. So, she went on Jihyo’s little quest for towels.

 

When she came back, however, everything was in chaos.

 

 “Momo, Momo—slow down!” Mina said, grabbing the older girl by the shoulders. The three youngest stood awkwardly, watching their older friends with attentive eyes.

 

“O-Okay.”

 

“Okay? You okay? Please stop panicking. What happened after Jeongyeon left?”

 

“It was a blur.”

 

The two girls watched as Jeongyeon left their sight, turning the corner and making her way toward the gym locker room. Jihyo sighed once the blonde was gone, placing a soft hand on Momo’s back and leading her into the practice room. Sana sat peacefully at the mirror, stretching to herself. She saw the two enter and perked up, maintaining eye contact through the mirror.

 

“Ah! You two! I was afraid if I had to pretend to stretch any longer, my leg would pop out of place!”

 

Sana’s smile faded as she looked at Momo’s puffy eyes, “Momoring? What’s wrong?”

 

“I explained the whole Nayeon-Chemistry thing to Jihyo,” Momo stated without pause.

 

The girl looked over to her friend, speaking, “Are you alright?”

 

“I think so,” Sana gave Momo a smile. Momo didn’t know if the smile was for herself or Sana. 

 

A rattling was heard near the door, and Nayeon walked in the door with a furrowed brow. The other girls were silent as the two groups stared each other down. Nayeon made the first move, breaking eye contact and throwing her bag down.

 

Jihyo spoke, startling the two Japanese girls with the anger in her voice, “Nayeon. You need to apologize to Momo.”

 

“What did I do this time?”

 

“It’s more like ‘What haven’t you done?’”

 

Nayeon was silent, so Jihyo continued.

 

“Seriously, Nayeon, you can’t keep treating people like .”

 

“I know.”

 

“So? Apologize to her.”

 

Nayeon turned to Momo with a weak smile.

 

“This may be a little overdue, but I really am sorry. I know that I embarrassed you that day, and I can’t make it up to you easily, but I’m trying.”

 

The room was silent, and Nayeon looked at Momo’s face, as if she was looking for something different in her eyes, making the dancer uncomfortable.

 

With a sigh, Momo spoke,“I think... I will accept. Just keep up your end of the bargain.” 

 

Nayeon’s mouth was wide with a grin, but her eyes told another story.

 

“So that’s all it takes for Im Nayeon to be a nice person? A little nudge?” 

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“I’m talking about everything! What changed? What happened to you that made you change so much? Why won’t you speak to me?”

 

“It was you, Jihyo.”

 

“Explain.”

 

“I don’t know. When your best friend calls you a bad person, it’ll inspire you to do better.”

 

“That’s all it took?”

 

Nayeon sighed, growing impatient, “What’s your point? What are we even arguing about? Are you seriously mad at me for growing up?”

 

“No! No, of course not. I-I’m just—”

 

“Just what? Trying to find a way to tell me that you hate me?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“I heard you and Momo talking.”

 

Jihyo’s eyes went wide, and she scrambled to explain, “Did you hear all of it? Even the part where I defended you?”

 

“No, I heard the part where you agreed with her! What, you don’t like me anymore? I understand why Momo was angry, but what the hell did I ever do to you!” Nayeon was shouting at this point.

 

“So Nayeon was angry at Jihyo? Because Jihyo had some secret gripe with her?” Mina asked, struggling to follow the story.

 

“Yeah, and then Sana started talking and it got way worse. Nayeon looked ready to either kill someone or kill herself, and I’m not sure which one she is doing right now. So maybe we should get going.”

 

Mina ushered Momo out, sending a silent look at the other girls in the room. They knew not to follow. Senior class drama.

 

When Mina walked into the room, she was greeted with the absence of Nayeon, an emotionally distraught Jihyo, and Sana, with a busted lip. Internally, her cogs were twirling to try and fill in the blanks of what happened. Externally, she could only say a few words.

 

“What the happened?”

 

“I never knew she felt that way, Mina. I feel horrible,” Jihyo said, immediately springing up to hug the girl.

 

“I understand,” even though she did not, in fact, understand, “Why is Sana bleeding?”

 

“She tried to stop Nayeon from leaving and fell on her face.”

 

Momo stepped forward with watery eyes, “I’m sorry, Jihyo. For all of this.”

 

“This wasn’t your fault, Momo. Everything is just so confusing.”

 

“Okay, can I know what went down here, Jihyo?” Mina said, gathering her attention, “Please?”

 

“Yes, of course.”

 

“Nayeon, I’m not angry at you! No, not even. But this is why I would be! You jump off the handle, fly off the bat, and all the other iterations of the idiom! It’s tiring trying to stop you from offending people when you are only interested in popularity!”

 

Nayeon’s face fell, and her shoulders went limp from their previously tense state, “Is that really what you think of me? ‘I’m only interested in popularity?’ Are you dense or insane? Jihyo, you have been ahead of me nearly my entire life. Your class won the pizza party while mine just got stickers. You were the line leader while I only held the door. You got class president while I was vice, you are rank 4 while I’m only rank 5—I mean, I could go on. Freshman year I was only known as ‘Jihyo’s older friend.’ I figured that, well you may be better at everything than me. Everyone may be better at everything than me. But if I can have my name. If I can have my name and be known, then I can be something. And somewhere down the line, I got that. But even then, it wasn’t mine. It was in everyone else’s hands. So yes, I got bitter. I got harsh, and y, and mean. It hit me like a train, heavy and out of control. I know that’s no excuse, but I’m really trying my hardest to fix myself. I’m learning to deal with some things that you don’t know about. It may seem like a weird popularity thing to someone who doesn’t know me, but you are like my sister, Jihyo. I think you should’ve known better and asked me.”

 

The room was silent. Jihyo couldn’t help but stare at Nayeon, making the older girl bend under her gaze. She noticed the bags under her eyes, and the unconscious twitching of her hand. 

 

(Little did Jihyo know, Nayeon was restraining herself. Nayeon just wanted to see what would happen if she kept this timeline.)

 

“Nayeon. I—”

 

“I can’t listen to this. I’m not mad, but I just can’t. I’m leaving.” Nayeon pivoted and power walked out of the room. 

 

Jihyo couldn’t focus. She heard Sana saying something and her sneakers squeaking. Her face slammed onto the floor. Jihyo helped her up, but couldn’t help but replay every word that Nayeon said.

 

“Oh, Jihyo,” Mina pulled her into a tight hug. 

 

Momo sighed, taking in the stuff she just heard.

 

Sana spoke (nasally, considering that her nose was swollen), “I’ve noticed that Nayeon doesn’t like talking about her feelings.”

 

“From what I can tell,” Mina spoke softly, “Nayeon is afraid of them.”

 

Rewind.

 

On the rooftop of the school, Nayeon watched the same bird land near her for the fifth time. In all honesty, it wasn’t that interesting, but Nayeon was trying to keep her mind off of things.

 

She heard footsteps echo behind her. She didn’t need to turn around or rewind to know that Jeongyeon was behind her.