Wendy thinks she is in trouble.

When she turned fifteen, she told her mom that she would be the bass player if she was ever in a band. It was also around the same time when she was in her rebellious “necktie and Martens phrase” and suddenly asked to cut her long hair short (to shoulder length). Her mom always tries her best to be understanding and loving, and her daughter, Son Seungwan, had been a straight-A student all her life, so the older woman did not see why she should stop the multi-instrumentalist from doing what she loved. Let alone this girl does have a flair for music. Her dad, the one who gave her the name Wendy, always see his younger self in his younger daughter and never have the heart to say no to her.

And Wendy had studied in boarding schools ever since she was eleven, ‘til she got into college. Perhaps partly out of guilt, her parents always cherish their time together, they always listen to what she has to say, despite the fact that she can talk for hours and her food always go cold and mostly untouched for the night. While her elder sister Seunghee, her best friend at birth and the person who spent her youth on a foreign land with Wendy, just told her that she would definitely be there for the band’s first show.

So, at the golden age of twenty-two, Wendy, who still wears her Martens, is the bass player for a rising band with her second best friend on earth called Kang Seulgi. It is not a rushed decision though. Graduated with a summa laude as a music major, Wendy has her future planned nonetheless—if her band cannot hit big, she can go back to college and continue her study as a graduate student and become a researcher (maybe a professor, one day) instead.

But it is not like Wendy has not acted on her impulse before. Like the summer when her last semester as a sophomore was approaching its end, she turned in the application form of going on an exchange to Seoul—the land, the city where she was born in—ten minutes before the deadline.

Kang Seulgi was the local student who she had to room with for the year, and she happened to have the same dream as Wendy. At first, the Canadian was not sure if Seulgi could fully understand her broken Korean or would brush her off as someone who just came to have fun. A pleasant surprise found its way to her door when she heard Seulgi humming to a self-made tune while working on her latest sketching assignment one afternoon after class. Seulgi’s voice is, indeed, very charming and as a choir veteran, Wendy has to admit that it was her first time to want someone else to sing the songs she composed so badly. And when Wendy gathered up enough courage to compliment Seulgi, Seulgi simply replied with a really, really adorable smile which resembled a bear cub and showed the girl her sketch, “Thanks! And, look! I think I need your approval for this one too.”

The topic for the assignment was to sketch a face, and Seulgi had drawn Wendy—who had been struggling to write a fitting riff for her new song she meant to upload to SoundCloud the weekend before.

“Also, I just wanna say,” Seulgi continued as her same-aged friend was literally lost for words. “I love your song. Where can I listen to it again?” Little did Wendy know, the music she was playing in her room, though incomplete and sometimes messy, was the best background sound for Seulgi to sketch and draw.

Soon, they started composing together and the followers of their SoundCloud account skyrocketed two months after they had uploaded their very first song. Everything went smoothly and there was even an indie label based in the UK that was interested to offer them a contract. In short, instead of flying back to Toronto at the end of her exchange trip, Wendy flied to Manchester with Seulgi to land themselves a record deal.

Maybe it was because of her middle school days where she became insecure of her adolescent body, Wendy is rather unconfident to stand in the spotlight and let herself (and her voice) shine even when she has grown into a beautiful woman with a sharp jawline and even abs. And it happened quite naturally when they asked if Seulgi was the lead singer of the band and Wendy answered yes when Seulgi was still processing the translator’s words.

“But you have such a great voice too!” Seulgi protested quietly tugging the hem of Wendy’s shirt once they decided to call for a short break and ask them to prepare for an impromptu recording session.

“I’ll still sing,” Wendy shook her head and looked into Seulgi’s eyes, which were so innocent and limpid but colorful and vibrant like a lake in Spring. “But we need you to be the frontwoman of our band. We are a duo, it’s not like I won’t get a chance to play and perform.”

Later, when the people from the label all acknowledged Wendy as a skilled bassist and were in awe with the girls’ harmonies, Seulgi finally agreed to the arrangements as she too recognized the glint in Wendy’s eyes and the upturn of her lips when her fingers worked their magic and danced on the fretboard.

Though Seulgi always finds it funny whenever Wendy is about to wear her bass strap at the backstage, for the girl is so petite for the rather huge (and long) instrument. Seulgi is the type of person who can never hide their giggles, so she would earn a cute glare from her cute bassist every time they are getting ready to perform.

It has been less than a year when they officially debuted with their album “Hands for the Gaze”, and it could be the word play of the name that they have an incredibly huge fanbase of girls and women, both locally and internationally. Even their album cover is a black and white, aesthetic shot of their hands, Wendy’s on a bass and Seulgi’s on a mic stand, which cuts to their chest-level, leaving their faces out of the frame. And their latest retro-rock single has been a great hit as well, ranking in top five in many international music charts. Too bad that they cannot go on tour as planned because of a global pandemic.

Now, the two same-aged soulmates can only stay at their shared apartment and promote their music online. Seulgi told Wendy that it reminds her of their college days and Wendy is just blessed to have Seulgi as both her bandmate and housemate. To be honest, they could have rented their own apartments separately, but they insist living together. Wendy has convinced their manager that it would not put a dent in their friendship even when they are practically together 24/7.

Well, maybe not 24/7. Seulgi did make another friend, Yerim, the keyboardist who has been a part of their touring crew since their debut and has a successful solo career as well. Since Wendy is not much of a big gamer, unlike Seulgi, and prefers killing time with cooking and baking, Seulgi these days ends up spending most of her time playing online games with Yerim whenever they are not creating new music or engaging with their fans online.

And so, although Wendy thinks she is in trouble, she does not know if she should turn to Seulgi this time.

It is not like she has never fallen in love before.

But it has never felt so unreal.

It all started when she was trying to make the Oreo muffins Seulgi craved after watching a random clip on YouTube last week. Before that, Seulgi had even asked if she can make them Dalgona coffee but Wendy politely declined as she would like to keep her wrist from overworking and their stand mixer has unfortunately broken down during Wendy’s failed attempt of making a fig cake two weeks ago, while they never have the chance to go out and get a new one.

Wendy is the type of person who hates absolute silence and cannot bear to be alone with her own thoughts, perhaps that is why she enjoys music so much. So, she decided to turn on some random popular videos on YouTube and leave them on autoplay as she was prepping the materials for the muffins.

And she swears she could feel her neck snap when she turned to check on her iPad hearing a sweet voice humming to an OST of a recent k-drama. Dropping the muffin tray on the marbled countertop, the bassist quickly cleaned her hands before picking up the device so that she could take a good look of the girl on the screen. She swears she has seen this face many times before, but it was her first time hearing her voice.

“Do you guys like the song?” The girl greeted her viewers with a sweet smile once she finished singing as the opening of her video. “I’m updating every two days now so I figured maybe you guys would want to see something new, something more from me! As you might already know, I used to attend a school of performing art and learned singing and dancing for a bit too. But I eventually chose to become a model instead of an idol.”

This girl certainly has the look that matches her voice. Or else, she would not be the face of many brands, displayed on the countless advertisements and posters. For some time, Wendy did not know where to look when the girl in this off-shoulder dress that might be a bit too tight went on talking about her story before she became a model.

Wendy did not even wear make-up in her spare time, but she somehow watched the whole clip of this girl introducing the latest eye make-up trend in South Korea and also how to coordinate an outfit that will go well with that. It has been a long time since Son Seungwan feels like a fangirl who is desperate to know everything about someone.

During her wait for the muffins to be ready, she even watched all her videos for the past week and looked the girl’s profiles up on all the social media platforms. It was her brain that warned her to think twice and not just click follow in such a haste. Right, she is kind of a celebrity now. There are eyes everywhere.

Still, Wendy has subscribed to the girl—Park Joy aka Park Sooyoung, a famous model and vlogger who endorses quite a number of well-known clothing and cosmetic brands—on YouTube and followed her on one of the social media platforms with her public account. Nothing creepy about that, right? She has seen Seulgi doing the same with a few of their backup dancers too.

However, Wendy almost threw her muffins from the drying rack to the sink as she received an inbox message later that day. It was from no one other than Joy.

“Thank you for following me, Wendy! It looks like your fans are following and subscribing to me as well. I’m glad you enjoy my content. I’m a big fan of your new album too!”

It took her thirty minutes to find the right words to reply and she almost prayed to every deity out there that she would not scare her off with her sometime cheesy persona.

“Hi, Joy! Your content is what we need at times like this. You sing so well. I wish I had stumbled upon your videos earlier! Too bad we don’t have many chances working with the fashion business. Anyway, I wonder if you have a favorite from our album?”

Whilst Joy, as confident as she looks, replied almost in a heartbeat and Wendy had a hard time catching her breath as her notifications kept ringing.

“You’re so nice, Wendy! I can’t believe I got praised by a professional singer. It means a lot to me. And it’s so hard to choose just one favorite! But if I really have to, of course it would be ‘The Flirty Cheekbones’! Bop of the year!”

Just when Wendy was about to return the kind gesture and compliment Joy’s professionalism this time, the model’s messages came again.

“And I also can’t help but wonder, whose cheekbones are flirty? Seulgi’s or yours?”

“Well, I kinda hope it’s yours, haha.”

. Wendy looked at her little muffins and buried her red face into her palms.

She could hear bells chiming in her ears.

“You’ll find out.”

She would never believe that this actually happened if chat history was not a thing. She guesses maybe this self-quarantine thing is slowly driving her crazy.

“I see her online, all the time

I'm trying not to stare down there

While she talks about her tough time”

Then, conversations like this have soon become a daily routine for them and the first thing Wendy does after waking up is to check if there is any new message from Joy. And usually there is, though Joy is not too fond of messaging and prefers face-to-face communication. Therefore, they have actually been doing video calls for a few days now.

Wendy originally was reluctant to comply with Joy’s request to video-call and had used the most generic and lame excuses there were, but Joy just read her like an open book, and eventually got her to open up. Not to mention Joy seems to know her way with words. Wendy cannot bring herself to turn her down when Joy asked her if she can help brainstorm some new ideas for her videos, asked her to teach her how to play an instrument of Wendy’s choice for a new series, asked her if she can just sit there and watch her practice bass or jam to a tune.

And so, Wendy has ceded her mind to this girl on the screen like a territory.

There was one time where Seulgi just barged into her room wanting to see if Wendy would like to order some Gongcha and the bassist almost jumped off her chair as if she got caught doing something wrong. To her surprise, Seulgi quickly muttered her apology and left without being too nosy.

Curious as Wendy ever is, the human incarnation of a squirrel, she had to ask Seulgi if she wanted to know who her “friend” was when she went to her room to pick up her grapefruit bubble tea.

“I know her,” Seulgi took a quick sip of her milk tea and reached out for her gaming mouse. “She’s kinda everywhere now, isn’t she? You don’t have a lot of friends here after all, Seungwan. I’m happy that you have someone to talk to apart from me. This is a hard time for everyone.”

“What can I say?” Wendy fiddled with her straw. “I stumbled upon her channel when baking last time. I subscribed and she messaged me, and we started talking. And she’s so nice though.”

“I think she went to our last show in the broadcasting station.” Seulgi looked up and flashed her friend a smile. “She’s friends with Irene so I remember seeing her name on the list when they asked if they could come.”

“Why am I hearing this for the first time?” Frowning, Wendy stirred her pearls. “They never showed me any list.”

“Come on, Seungwan!” Seulgi lifted her arm to gently tap on her shoulder. “You’re the one who said you aren’t dealing with things like that. And……Well, you seldom invite anyone other than your family and old schoolmates. So basically, you almost never invited anyone to come unless we play overseas. Our managers have stopped coming to you for that for some time now.”

Seulgi is right, she is absolutely right about this. Wendy has been shutting herself off and away from people for the longest time and it is not healthy. She cannot live with only music and occasionally her family and friends and Kang Seulgi. Seulgi thinks it is time for Wendy to step out of her comfort zone and take over the world as Wendy Son Seungwan, not merely as the cool bassist with a nice voice of “Animal Collective and A Pinch of Bass”.

Even when it is just someone else’s world, Seulgi smiled to herself.

Yesterday was no exception. Wendy settled down in front of her laptop and waited for the other girl to join her. But Joy was taking unusually, particularly long. It is usually the bassist who comes in late due to her overly cautious personality.

Wendy did not mind waiting though. At least she could take time rehearsing what to say (and what not), making sure not to mess up or embarrass herself with her most random brain vomit.

“Hey!” The blonde waved excitedly when the girl finally appeared on the screen. “Good to see you!”

Joy let out a chuckle as if Wendy had just told her a funny joke, “Yeah, do you really mean it though?”

“Huh? Come again?” Wendy widened her eyes, scared that she had said something wrong already.

“Are you really happy to see me?” Joy fixed her bangs which had grown quite a lot and were covering her eyes a little. “Or, do you actually find this getting boring? You can always speak your mind, you know-”

“No way!” The bassist, who also happens to have nice pipes, interjected loudly before Joy would keep on going with her pessimistic thoughts—which was rare though, Joy was supposed to be the loud and confident one. Wendy has found out from their conversations that this girl does have a lot of insecurities as well, so maybe they are not so different after all. “I can’t ask for more when you’re willing to keep talking to me like this.”

And Joy immediately beamed, which blinded the other woman for a second, “You better mean it, Wendy. Good to see you too.”

“Wow,” Wendy heaved a dramatic sigh of relief, earning giggles from Joy who seemed to be in good mood. “So much to get you to tell me that you’re glad to see me too.”

“What? I’m dedicated!”

“Dedicated to talking?”

The model’s face fell for a second as she was reading the bassist’s confused face, “Dedicated to talking to you!”

“Well, I am too!” Wendy simply did not understand how they got to this. They had talked about their lives before the fame, they had talked about their pursuers, they had talked about Joy’s dog, they had talked about what they would do if they never got into the showbiz—never had they talked about how they felt.

Which sounded very strange to Wendy’s ears. The bassist has long attuned to feelings hidden in melodies and metaphors. She did write her very first love letter to her choirmate. She can be curt about her feelings, or, maybe not anymore.

“But you-” Joy rolled her eyes trying to orchestrate her sentence. “You’re always so proper and polite! We’ve been talking to each other every day, but you talk to me like you have to talk to me because we are classmates and we have to work on a group project together. Ah, I don’t even know what I’m saying right now? Do you?”

“How come?” Wendy, frustrated at the sudden accusation, unknowingly slammed her hand on the table and the laptop shook a little. “Is it because I didn’t want to video-call in the first place?”

“I don’t know.” Joy, the younger one, let her childish side take over and turned away from her computer. “Whatever.”

“No, Joy! It’s not whatever!”

“This feels too unreal to me!”

Wendy paused for a second at the familiar expression coming out of Joy’s mouth and thought of something that she might regret saying many years later, “Let’s meet for real then. Tomorrow.”

“Girl of your dreams, you know what I mean

There's something 'bout her stare that makes you nervous

And you say things that you don't mean”

-

They are meeting at a small café a few blocks away from where Joy lives. Most shops are not opening at times like this. And it is Wendy’s idea since she is the one with the driver’s license and their manager did not ask much based on the simple fact that she is also the one who does grocery shopping for the duo.

The minute Wendy steps into the compound, she can feel a pair of eyes roaming on her body. She did struggle on deciding what to wear this morning, but like what Seulgi always says, simple is the best. So, a plain white shirt and a fresh pair of jeans it is.

“I can see that you’ve ed the first two buttons.” Joy calmly comments once the bassist joins her at the table at the farthest corner, though there is no other customer to begin with.

Wendy has to break the stare as her hands are getting clammy already, “Well, I don’t want a certain someone to say that I’m acting so prim and proper.”

“Hmm,” Joy’s slender fingers linger on the menu a bit too long while her eyes and mind are definitely somewhere else. “And my advice is, you can one more.”

Drawing a sharp breath, the bassist covers her chest with her hand and snatches the menu from the model with her other, “I want some cold brew, do they sell these here?”

The smile on Joy’s smile does not falter however, she makes sure the barista is not looking their way before she tries again, “I love me some bitterness too. But don’t you want something sweet though?”

Wendy is quick on her feet this time and leans back on the wooden chair, distancing herself from the huge ball of flirt across the table as she deadpans, “Like something that is as sweet as you?”

“Don’t you though?” She presses on.

“…... Too much sugar is not good for your health.” She dodges.

Joy looks at her one more time before she puts on her professional face and walks up to the counter to order their drinks. And Wendy finally notices that she is wearing sneakers today. Still, it does not seem to affect the model’s body proportions at all. All of a sudden, Wendy has a horrifying picture in her head and makes a mental note that she shall never walk side by side with her in her life.

Maybe there are some perks of having this self-quarantine thing.

She is just a girl on the screen. She is just someone who has an upper body in a frame. She isn’t real.

This isn’t real.

But a warm, soft touch on her face tells her otherwise. Joy who is now conveniently blocking the counter from where Wendy is sitting, gently pinches her cheek as her tall shadow engulfs Wendy, “You know, social-distancing isn’t hard. It is only hard when you are looking so cute but I can’t be there to pinch you cheeks…… Until now.”

Wendy can feel her neck and face burning when the room is not stuffy at all, “……. Thanks?”

“Damn,” Joy awkwardly laughs as the bassist is too embarrassed to lift her head up, “I thought band people are all flirty and zealous until I met you two, dumb and dumber.”

“Eh, you mean Seulgi and me?”

“Who else?”

“I’m sorry?” She just somehow apologizes. What a bad habit of hers. Always saying her sorry first. You cannot live like this, Yerim once said to her.

Joy almost does not catch that since the barista is calling them and their orders are up. Strutting back to her seat with her long legs, the younger woman is rather displeased by the dense brain of the bassist and slides her the glass of cold brew, “Flirt back!”

Wendy would have screamed her head off if this was really just a bad dream, “I’m trying!”

“You’re hopeless. I’m hopeless.” Joy watches the ice cubes in her latte melt and condensation form on her glass. “I can’t believe I’m doing this, we’re doing this.”

“Hey,” Wendy remains her composure after precisely three sips of her black coffee. “I’m buying you drinks next time. Now how does this sound, Miss Park?”

Slightly clumsy, Joy mentally comments. She has seen dumb and dumber flirting with their fans on stage and even online but who could have known the silver tongues of theirs just turn dull when they are just Seulgi and Seungwan.

That is a good thing though. At least it means she isn’t doing this often.

“I’ll take it.”

“This time, I think I'm gonna drink through it

But I see her online, and I don't think that I should be calling all the time

I just wanted a happy ending

And I'm pretending I don't care 'bout her stare

While she's giving me a tough time”

Joy edits her own videos, so she has her busy days. While Wendy is relatively living a more leisure life. There are days where Joy has to postpone or even cancel their calls at the last minute. No hard feelings though, work is work, Wendy understands. On the other hand, thankfully the pandemic situation is getting better and the band has just announced the new dates for their tour.

But something changes. She starts to hesitate whenever she is about to press the call button.

Everything will soon return to normal, including this.

She does not want to call, she does not to become someone who stands in her way, she does not want to become another pest in her life who does not know how to take the cue and leave.

She has been looping one song all day as her mind is going nowhere. Her bass is long forgotten on the sofa while she is just playing meaninglessly on her electronic keyboard. She has even poured herself an evening drink.

Everything sounds like dissonance.

The band needs a saxophonist for the upcoming tour, but they are still trying to find the right one. Seulgi is not too sure about the new arrangements for the lead guitar in the new rendition of their debut song, “It’s February in Manchester And We Know It (And I Feel Fine)”. One of their backup dancers is pregnant, and one of their managers is getting married next month.

Like who else in the city drinks a White Russian alone at home, five in the afternoon? She needs her coffee, even when it is in the form of coffee liquor, accompanied with vodka and cream.

Funny how Seulgi and her were born in the same year, the same month, on the same land. And even when Wendy had left for another country for almost a decade, they still met each other.

If she had never met Seulgi, maybe she would never become the bassist she wanted to be. She would not have a band, she would not be loved by many, she would not be able to do what she loves for a living. She would not be who she is if Seulgi was never born.

Joy said she would be a kindergarten teacher if she was never scouted by that modelling agency.

Speaking of which, her latest video has been up for an hour, and Wendy finally gives in and checks her channel. The algorithm there is ridiculous as there is a pop-up ad starring Joy before her video can begin. Meanwhile, fans of her band on the social media platforms are rejoicing at the tour announcement and her phone is buzzing with notifications and congratulation messages from people.

Wendy does not hear a thing of what Joy is introducing this time as she is too busy reading her followers’ comments and thinking about how different they actually are.

She is the girl on the screen and steals the spotlight wherever she goes. She is the girl who belongs to the right side of the stage and harmonizes.

But life is a like a box of chocolate, which punches you in the mouth because you usually pick up the one filled with cheap liquor without knowing.

Her phone rings, someone is calling. Joy is calling.

“Video-call, now.” She does not even bother to greet her.

Wendy drags her feet to her laptop, “Why the hurry?”

Joy asks as if she is a kid waiting to be praised, “Have you seen my new video yet?”

“Yeah.” She nods even though she cannot see her yet.

“Well then, how’s it?” She starts waving to her once the video is on and ends the phone call.

Wendy, however, does not say a thing when she just stares her down from the other side of the screen. Though taken aback at first, Joy returns the stare with the same intensity and it does not take long for her to notice the unusual flush on the other woman’s cheeks, “Have you been drinking?”

And Wendy finally smiles, raising her old fashioned glass to the camera, “Yes.”

“Oh,” Joy pursues her lips, her expression unreadable. “Are you guys celebrating or something? I saw the news of your tour as well.”

“Maybe.” The Canadian slurs, looking away like she has spotted something very interesting on her ceiling. “Seulgi’s not home though.”

“You are not drunk, are you?”

“I wish I was.”

“Wendy,” Joy calls and tries her best not to let her voice quiver. “I am asking you one more time—what do you think about my new video?”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t hear a thing. I’ll watch it again later.” Wendy holds her glass with both of her hands and let her bad habit take over again. “I’m sorry, please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not mad.” Ruffling her newly-cut hair, the younger woman leans closer to her screen. “I’m doing this show two weeks from now. Are you coming or not?”

The clinking of the ice cubes in her glass muffles her voice, “But I don’t know about fashion.”

“I don’t know about music either.” Joy is flustered, not knowing what has taken over the bassist this evening and thinks maybe she would comply like she always does if she is assertive enough, “Come.”

Wendy, with one foot tangled in the cables and wires connecting her instruments and her computer, empties her glass and the carpet of her room suddenly feels like warm sand back in Crane Beach. She feels like sinking as the sun sets before her eyes.

“Put my name on your list.”

Gosh, what did she just say? 

She never looks for trouble, trouble looks for her.

But it's worth it when the girl on the screen smiles.

Here it is, my very firsrt WenJoy story (they are so adorable together, ahhh). And welcome back, Wendy!

This turns out to be way longer than I planned so I made this into a two-shot.

As obvious as it is, this is inspired by the song by The 1975 (so happy that Wendy's a fan too). So, I hope this story kinda does the song justice.

Will update the last part soon. And then, I will get back to "The Ungodly Moments".

Thank you for the support. Let me know in the comments how you think of the story so far.