[ C H A P T E R   S I X ]

Yongsun had no idea how many hours she spent crying in bed, but she was drained with how much she’s been crying. Her loud bawling subsided into small whimpers as she pulled her blanket up to cover half of her face — hiding from who or what, she had no idea but she didn’t feel like seeing anything or anyone in general. She hates climbing into bed with clothes she wore from outside without washing up first, but she’s been wearing last night outfit for so long that she forgot about it. 

She heard the door to her apartment open and close constantly, she heard the faint echo of her sister calling her name and the loud banging from the door begging her to open up. Then, she heard her panicked sister calling Byul for help, but none of those fazed Yongsun much as she remained in her bed, staring at nothing at all and just cried. 

Yongsun hates that even through all of these, she still wondered if Eric was okay, or how he’s coping with this situation — is he relieved or is he hurting just as much as she is right now? She wasn’t sure if she wanted to know if he was in as much pain as she was, but she hates the thought of him being in pain, so somewhere in the depth of her heart, she prayed and prayed that he could cope with this better than she could.

Her thoughts were soon disrupted by a few loud banging on her door again, but this time followed by Byul’s loud and almost angry voice screaming for her to open the door. She closed her eyes and pretended that she didn’t hear anything because she really didn’t feel like opening the door for anyone today, but Byul could be very persisting and Yongsun knew exactly that. 

She sat up at the fifth knock and stared at her door. She heard them trying every spare keys they could find to unlock her door, then she watched as her door flew open with a bewildered Byul and Yonghee staring straight at her. 

    “What the hell are you doing? Are you crazy?” 

Yongsun wasn’t sure why or how exactly, but at the sight of the two people she’s the closest with, her recent subsided cries came back rushing through . Her lips quivered and before she even knew it, she broke down crying so hard in front of them that it took them by surprise. 

Yongsun has never cried that hard, at least not in the presence of anyone. 

They rushed over to hold her as tightly as they could, her cries lost in their shoulders.

    “I can’t do this, I don’t know how to deal with this anymore.” She cried, her words barely making enough sense even to herself, but she continued anyway because she felt like anymore longer, she won’t be able to speak anymore. “I thought breaking up with him would make both of us feel better, but I feel even more miserable.”

    “You what?” 

    “Byul-ah, I don’t know how to do this anymore.” 

All sorts of thoughts swirled around the younger woman’s head, but she could barely caught on any. They were all very close, but none of them have really gone through breakups or talked about it with each other but to see the brightest person she has ever known breaking down begging for help because she no longer had a clue on how to deal with this, anger fumed inside her — Byul had no idea if she was mad at Eric for hurting the one who was always the happiest to her, or if she felt equally bad for him as well because she had a feeling he was taking this situation as hard as the older woman she’s holding did, maybe even worst, he’s all alone.

When she was rushing to Yongsun’s apartment earlier, she called Eric just in case he knew what was wrong with Yongsun, but he never picked up so she disregarded it as he was busy — but hell, Byul thought, what went so wrong for them?

They were each other’s everything, and even everyone around them could tell but what happened that it went so wrong?

She tighten her wrap around the older woman in her arms, her cries echoed through the room and it shattered her heart by the seconds. Whatever happened, she swears she’ll always be on Yongsun’s side, and whatever happened, she knows they both will work this out because if it’s anything that Byul believes about love, it’s that true love will always find a way back to each other, no matter how long it will take. 

With Yongsun and Eric, she knows it’s true love because their breakup pains each other more than it was supposed to. 

Surrounded by nothing but completely darkness, Eric laid down on his bed, his phone in his hand and he was staring at the ceiling for no reasons at all. For a long while, it felt like it wasn’t even ceiling that he was seeing, but a complete empty spaces that just had no depth at all. Yongsun’s voice rang in his head, and he felt hollow like he had just lost something very important to him — it felt unbearable because he had a feeling it might be pretty much impossible to make things right between them again.

He hurts her. 

He cursed out loud, at no one in particular but at himself. He loved her, yet he ed it up. He wanted to give her the world, and gave her all the love she deserved but here they are, hurting in their own respective room over a love that shattered because he ed it all up. For a moment, it felt almost as if he was gobbled up by the dark of his surrounding. He closed his eyes and made no efforts to stop it from devouring him for as long as it craved — just so, he could find a momentary escape from the constant throbbing pain inside his chest. 

His phone buzzed, pulling him back from his momentary escape. He stared at Byul’s name in his phone, but couldn’t bring himself to pick it up because he knew what this was all about. He couldn’t bare to hear Yongsun crying in the background, nor could he bare to hear how much she’s hurting right now. He had never seen Yongsun cry, the most was her shedding a few tears and that was it. But to see her scrunching down and cried her heart out like that last night, he was completely wrenched. 

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew Byul would be cursing him out by now for not picking up, and sooner or later, she’d be cursing him out for ruining Yongsun or coming straight over to kill him. Eric wouldn’t even mind even if she decided to go straight for the second option, he was just as outraged at himself like she would.

His phone buzzed again, but this time it was someone he hates to even see her number on his phone screen. He removed her contact, because seeing her name made him feel sick in the stomach, but she called so much that even without her name saved, he already had an idea of whom the number belonged to. 

The buzzing stopped then it started again, and again, and again until Eric got so furious he almost threw his phone across his room. What they had was a toxic relationship that he'll always regret, they ended because she was too much and it was unbearable for him, and she knew exactly that. But for the sake of god, Eric thought, she haunted him like a ing ghost and he’s tired of all the bulls he has to deal from her. 

Yongsun’s voice rang in his ears again, and his head spun. Let’s take a break.

A break, he thought. She’s asking for a break, and he’s going to make sure he makes everything right this time around. 

He loosened his grip on his buzzing phone and brought it closer to him instead. Yongsun gave him another chance to choose this all over again, and this time, he’s going to settle this thing down conclusively. Picking up the call, he brings his phone to his ear. 

    In a gravelly rigid tone no one has probably ever heard from him before him, he speaks, “Let’s set things clear between us once and for all now.” 

This time, he’ll never allow her to ruin what he and Yongsun have anymore. Their relationship was something from the past, and this time he’ll make sure he puts it all where it truly belongs definitively — the past.