A familiar tap on his bedroom window pulls Wooyoung from his thoughts and he sits up on his bed, glancing curiously at the window. The curtains are closed though so he can’t really see anything. Another tap quickly comes and he is compelled so go see what’s going on, so he gets up from the bed, walks toward the window and draws the curtails to open the window.

He finds his boyfriend San standing down there with a big smile, waving up at Wooyoung.  Wooyoung’s eyes widen in surprised to see San here at 9:30 pm. Yes San visits a lot but never at this hour.

San makes a huge heart over his head with his arms, and Wooyoung can’t help smiling despite the heavy sadness weighing on his chest. He never fails to melt inside at the sight of San’s eye smile. “What are you doing here?” He whisper yells, feeling excitement bubble up inside him.

“Can I come in and tell you all about it?” San yells back.

Wooyoung nods, figuring his parents wouldn’t hear them anyway. He helps San up the small ladder and into Wooyoung’s bedroom.

The moment San is safely inside, he pulls Wooyoung into a big hug. He sighs in delight when Wooyoung cups the back of his head and guides his head into the crook of Wooyoung’s neck to cradle it there.

“I missed you.” San breathes, his breathe warm against Wooyoung’s skin. “That’s why I came. I got worried when you didn’t turn up at the café to hang up with us today.”

Wooyoung’s arms tighten around San. He hates it when San worries and unfortunately that’s all he seems to make his boyfriend do lately.
“I’m not sick or anything. I just…. didn’t feel like going.”

“I know.” something about San’s tone says that he understands exactly what Wooyoung is feeling and that there is no need to explain. It’s both a blessing and a curse to have a boyfriend who understands him so well. He sighs miserably and chooses to draw comfort from the sweet feel of their hearts beating together as they stay like that for a while, holding each other.

Wooyoung and San among their other same age friends all recently took college entrance exams and only Wooyoung failed. Since he results came out, Wooyoung has shied away from everyone, too embarrassed even in front of his friends. Every one of their friends understands and no one is judging or laughing, but Wooyoung is still having a hard time and San understands.

He understands that Wooyoung is hurting and he needs his space, but after 5 days straight of not seeing his better half, he had to come here. He had to make sure Wooyoung is okay. He had to satisfy his yearning to comfort Wooyoung in any way he can, to hug him, kiss him. While Wooyoung has barely been out to hang out with their friends for months, he asks San to come visit sometimes, but that’s not enough for San. He wishes he could see Wooyoung more.

“Are you doing okay?” San asks.

Wooyoung wordlessly shakes his head, suddenly feeling teary. “The worst part is that my parents say ‘it’s okay’, but I can see the disappointment in their eyes. Lately they are worried that I’m getting depressed because I hardly leave home to hang out with friends, so all they do is worry. I hate doing that to them.”

San pulls back to look at Wooyoung and cups his cheeks. He leans forward and kisses Wooyoung’s forehead and then his nose. “I’m sorry that your life is so y and I can’t help.”

“The worst part for me is that you and I can’t go to college together. I can’t go with our friends either.”

“You’ll join me later. Just retake the test. I’m sure you’ll make it the second time. I’ll wait for you. Of course we all will.”

Wooyoung nods, the confidence in San’s eyes giving him some hope and courage.

San pulls back entirely, and reaches into his hoodie pocket, taking out a tiny plush panda bear and a packaged cookie. “I brought something to cheer you up.” He pauses to peer at the items in his hands and then smiles wider as he amends. “Two things actually.”

It is so typical of San to do cute and sweet little gestures like these and Wooyoung’s heart just skitters away every time. Undoubtedly the bear is part of San’s precious plush toy collection. Wooyoung is touched that San is kind enough to give Wooyoung one of his babies. He smiles and takes the cookie and bear from his boyfriend. “Thank you.” Looking at the plushie, Wooyoung asks, “Did you name him already?”

“That’s up to you. You can do it whenever you want.”

San cups Wooyoung’s cheeks and gently squishes them to make a face. He giggles and leans up to kiss Wooyoung’s thick, puckered lips. “Please don’t be sad. You are not alone. We can do this together. I won’t let go of your hand.”

A lump forms on Wooyoung’s throat as tears well up in his eyes. To think he almost broke up with San a few months ago when he wanted to give up on everything. There is nothing Wooyoung is more grateful for right now than having San here to smile when he can’t, hug him when he cries, kiss him when he needs it, bring him sweet treats when he needs a pick up.

“Okay.” Wooyoung nods.

“good.” San leans up and presses a soft kiss to Wooyoung’s forehead for good measure.

Wooyoung opens his mouth to speak, but gets interrupted by a knock at his bedroom door. Panic assails both him and his boyfriend. They exchange a wide-eyed look of askance before glancing at the door.

“That’s my parents. Do you think they heard something?” Wooyoung whispers to San.

“I doubt-”

“Honey is everything okay in there? We heard voices.” Wooyoung’s mother calls out from the other side, answering both their question. This throws San and Wooyoung into frenzy as they quietly try to hide San. If Wooyoung’s parents find out that he has someone over at this hour, they’ll freak out.

“Wooyoung is everything okay?” it’s his father this time.

“um… y-yeah. everything’s… I’ll be right there. Hold on.” he squeezes his eyes shut, hating how guilty he sounds. With combined effort, they manage to hide San in Wooyoung’s closet and Wooyoung quickly dashes to the door, unlocks it and pulls it open. Both his parents are standing there, concern written all over their faces. His mother cranes her neck and peers inside the room behind him, visibly searching for something.

“What’s wrong, mum?” Wooyoung asks and it’s his father who replies.

“We heard voices.”

“Oh that. I was just…..” Wooyoung pauses when he belatedly realises he has spoken too hastily without a proper lie in mind.

His parents exchange a worried look. “Sweetheart, were you talking to yourself again?” Wooyoung’s mum asks

“I never talk to myself.” he defends. “I talk on the phone, to….someone.” Wooyung fumbles, but his parents don’t look convinced at all.

His mum says, “Maybe you shouldn’t spend so much time alone. You could come down stairs more often and spend some time with us.”

“You could talk to us.” His dad adds to the encouragement

“Better yet you could meet people, go out with your friends like you used to, maybe even a nice boyfriend.”

Wooyoung’s dad nods, “It’s not healthy to be alone all the time. Dating might help you get your mind off things.”

Wooyoung just blinks at both his parents, trying to understand why they are doing this to him now. He loves his parents to death and he understands they are just worried, but their concern in smothering him a bit. More importantly right now is that San is listening in on this embarrassing conversation.

“I hear you.” Wooyoung says, hoping against hope that it’s enough to appease his parents. “I still talk to people.” San. I talk to San.

“And that’s great, but you can do better. That’s all we are saying.” His mother gently says

suddenly there is a small shuffling noise behind Wooyoung and he turns around to check on what’s happening, but he in no way expects to find San standing there –out of hiding. He is smiling and waving cutely at Wooyoung and his parents. Wooyoung’s eyes widen comically. “San!” Wooyoung whispers in horror

“What’s going on here?” Wooyoung’s mum asks her son while eyeing the admittedly cute boy standing behind her son. 

San smiles nervously and takes just about two steps forward, “hello. My name is Choi San, Wooyoung’s boyfriend. I’m sorry I haven’t come over to greet you properly, but please take care of me.”

Wooyoung chokes on air, whirling back around to see his parents’ reaction and yet again he is shocked because he finds them grinning so broadly. Before he can digest all that’s happening, his father pats him on the back, “son, why didn’t you tell us you had a boyfriend?”

“Oh my, he is so adorable.” Wooyoung’s mum pushes past her son and goes to hug San and shower him with a lot of crooning while asking him all sorts of questions he can’t even get the chance to answer. She looks at her son after a moment and says, “Wooyoungie, you’ve outdone yourself with this one. I’ve seen you two together, but I thought you were just hanging out as friends.”

Up until Wooyoung’s mother hugs him, San was so frightened that his heart is probably about to jump right out of his chest. It was a completely random and impromptu move to pop out of hiding and greet his boyfriend’s parents. He got kind of miffed listening to them talk to Wooyoung like he is so pitiful and hopeless.

In coming out of hiding and introducing himself, San hopes to prove to Wooyoung’s parents that Wooyoung isn’t doing as poorly much as they think he is. Despite the awkward little smile San has on his face right now, his insides are dancing in relief and joy that because his idea seems to be working. 

“I’m so happy that you’ve decided to introduce yourself.” Wooyoung’s mum says to San, her hands still on his upper arms. She knows she is probably scaring the poor boy with her shinning eyes and overzealous smile, but she really doesn’t care. San -handsome and cute San- is a sign that her son is actually doing better than she thought, and that’s all the reason she needs to smile stupidly for the rest of the month.

Beside her, Wooyoung’s dad is not any better. He is giving San such a once over with an impressed smile on his face.

“Indeed. We are delighted to meet any of our Wooyoungie’s friends.”

Finally satisfied with her assessment of San, she steps back and goes to stand beside her husband, taking hold of his arm and leaning into his side. They both just stand there smiling like idiots at their son and his boyfriend.

It has been a few months since Wooyoung has seen the delight and pride that’s written on his parents’ faces right now. It’s a lovely sight. It’s a small victory, but a victory nonetheless- a lot more than he has had in a long time. His chest squeezes, but for the right reasons this time and he has San to thank for this. He turns toward San and sends him a look of adoration. San is looking at him the exact same way. 

“Aww they are so adorable, Honey. Do you see how they look at each other?” Wooyoung’s mum coos, speaking to her husband

Wooyoung and San break their gaze and they smile shyly.

She snaps her fingers, suddenly remembering something and getting a lovely idea. “We are about to have some chocolate cake downstairs. San please stay and eat with us. We’d love to have you.”

Her eyes are imploring full of hope that San finds it hard to say no, but he also doesn’t want to make even uncomfortable just in case all this is too much for him. So he subtly nudges Wooyoung looks up at him, only to find that Wooyoung is wearing an expression a kin to his mum’s. San supposes the answer is clear then.

“I love cake.” San announces, officially accepting the invitation.

“Perfect. Alright then we’ll go downstairs and finish up.” Wooyoung’s mother declares, “You boys stay up here and…do your thing. Don’t feel shy. We won’t listen in or anything.”

Wooyoung’s eyes widen in dismay and he gives his parents a scandalised look, while San looks away to hide his red cheeks.

“Come on, darling. Let’s leave the kids be.” Wooyoung’s dad reaches for his wife’s hand and takes it, gently pulling her away. “Come down to eat in about 20 minutes, kids.”

“Yes, dad.” Wooyoung replies and then his parents are gone.

They are alone again in the centre of the bedroom after Wooyoung shuts the door. 

San bashfully smiles at his boyfriend, “Too much?”

Wooyoung closes the distance between them and snakes his arms around San’s waist, pulling him close. A small and proud smile is playing on his lips the entire time. He gives San a peck on the lips and the other eyes him with askance, “I think my parents will get off my back for a while and it’s all thanks to you.”

“So, you are not mad?”

“No. I’m actually thankful.”

San’s small eyes blink, stunned, but he soon catches himself and smiles back sweetly, “then you are welcome. I’m happy to help.” San’s arms slide around Wooyoung’s neck as he leans in and gently brushes his nose against Wooyoung’s.

“You’re the best boyfriend in the world.” Wooyoung whispers.

“I love you too.” San says and he closes the final distance between them to kiss Wooyoung on the lips.