"Unforseen and disasterous, our deepest temptations dangled about in front of us, only to be stripped away piece by piece" – Notebook

9/14/2020

 

 

The morning had been rough, I swear it’s even colder today than it was yesterday. Better yet I could barely get any sleep after the devastating losses our frontlines took yesterday, namely my pride.

To my surprise, when I open the door to the class I notice the same bag from yesterday at the back set of seats.

That’s pretty weird, you’d think she would have sat with one of the other girls from yesterday. I figured they would have gotten to her by now and tried to all become friends with her. But now that I think about it, she probably just wants to sit in the back and not get stared at the whole time. Yeah, that makes a lot more sense actually. She probably has plans to sit with someone back there...

When I look around the classroom, there are a handful of kids sitting, scattered about. Luckily the seat next to where Taki was yesterday looks to be empty as I approach it and go to set down my bag.

“Wow you really wanna get away from me that bad, huh, dodgeball?” A voice calls out behind me.

Dodgeball?

When I turn around I see Yujin standing in the open doorway to the classroom, with a hand on her hips and her hair now in twin braids.

“Ah...no...I just figured you had someone you wanted to sit with” I nervously blurt out.

She just walks up to her seat and sits down, then begins taking out her books with an overly pouty expression.

“Ah, I see, well I mean if you don’t want to sit next to me, then I mean you don’t have to or anything” She says refusing to make eye contact and glancing down at the page in front of her, lips still pursed.

I – I don’t get it, does she actually want me to sit next to her..? Ah- don’t let yourself think like that, you’re just going to end up disappointed. She’s clearly just teasing us after what happened yesterday.

But... when will I get this chance again in life...and she’s just going to think she can tease me whenever if I just take it....

I anxiously swipe my bag and walk around her and place it down beside the desk and take my seat. When I gain the courage to look over and see her reaction, I see she’s got a big smile on her face and says “Ahhh welcome back, dodgeball!”

“...Why are you calling me that..” I grumble back at her.

“Huh what do you mean!? That was incredible yesterday! I’ve never seen anything like that. It was so funny, I told all the members when I got home, they didn’t believe me! But I told them it totally happened and-“

. . .

. .

.

!!

SHE TOLD THEM?

She talked about what happened yesterday with them?

So that means...

So.....she told Hyewon....a story about me....Hyewon knows me?

My brain starts to overheat as my mind goes wild with preposterous possibilities. Filled with all the beautiful moments me and Kwangbae can share just like we have in my dreams all these years! That’s right, I need to ask her about Hyewon! I have been too nervous and acting like an idiot instead of seizing this once in a lifetime opportunity.

They were like “no way you could actually see the stitches of the dodgeball on his head, you’re exaggerating” and I told them, no it’s true you really could! It was amazing, I’ve never seen anyone catch a ball like that hahaha, man you really made my day with that, dodgeball. She continues her story while shaking her finger at me.

I put my hand to my forehead and swear I can feel the stinging sensation as if it just happened.

She is enjoying this way too much, I think to myself as I grimace.

. . .

As the class winds down, I had my confidence built up and had it decided, I was gonna ask her, I was going to ask her about Hyewon!! It would be straight to the point and concise and I would be so well spoken she’d have no choice but to spill all the gory details.

“I, Uh-“ I manage to spill out as I accidentally not my textbook to the floor.

She looks over and leans down picking the book up from underneath her seat.

“Eh, are you the clumsy type, dodgeball? That’s not going to work here, I have real high standards when it comes to desk partners” She chastises me with a playful smile as she places it back on my desk.

Is she serious? The same girl who left her face permanently imprinted on our class door on the first day is calling me a clutz?

...calm down, we have to stay focused, eyes on the prize Jae.

“Ah...thanks...you uh...mentioned your members earlier...” I mention, my nervousness present with every syllable.

She raises a brow and nods.

“Yeah? Why, you want an autograph? Hmmm I guess it depends which one” she starts to think to herself looking up to the ceiling

“For my beloved dodgeball and desk mate I could possibly get you one, you must be a real big fan to go through all this trouble for an autograph...is that why you’re always staring, dodgeball?” She says putting both her hands to her face making a terrible attempt at aegyo.

“What!? No, what are you talking about” I say, pulling my desk away from hers.

“I-I just thought it must be interesting is all...living there...and not with your parents...”

She gives a surprised look, then leaning back in her chair.

“Oh...well if you put it like that, I guess you’re right, it is pretty unique huh?” She then lets out, a smile once again overtaking her.

*RING*

The bell goes off, as the entire class immediately stands up and makes their dash for the doors.

Damnit, I just missed my chance. Why do you have to be so stubborn!! Just say you wanted the damn autograph you idiot!

I sigh to myself as I get up along with the herd to make my way out, when I feel something leave my pocket.

The clanging on my seat makes me immediately realize what it is, and I start to wonder if my luck could really get any worse in life.

It better not be cracked.

When I turn back to grab it, it’s not there, instead it is in Yujin’s hand.

She is staring at it with a complex look on her face.

Staring at my phone...

Staring at my phone...

Wait

Staring at the home screen of my phone!!!