Joohyun laughs in the full-bodied way she only does when she is truly comfortable, raven hair gleaming under the sunlight streaming into the quaint little cafe. She is (and maybe always has been) the picture of beauty herself.

"Don't be so sure," The older girl smiles playfully, head tilted to the side and eyes gleaming. She is in a simple jacket and jeans combo but the way she moves with grace makes Seulgi's chest ache just a little more with want. "Maybe Sooyoung actually wants to be with her. I heard she told Seungwan she had a matching music note."

"As if." She scoffs, acutely aware of the little mark on her own shoulder. It almost burns, the way it brands her and ties her to the other half meant to be. Joohyun would be the kind to make fun of soul marks. This topic always comes up and always will, won't it? "'Hey Seungwan, I know we've been living together for years but I've never told you we match. No, this isn't sharpie.'"

"Hey, they were practically together already anyway," Joohyun replies. She taps a slender finger rhythmically on their table, hot chocolate forgotten. "They're practically meant to be."

Like us? She wants to say but doesn't, because this is how it is. Late nights and little secrets and silence, silence, silence. She settles for a long sip of her drink instead, turning away in a bid to ignore the way her heart screams Joohyun, Joohyun, Joohyun. Unlike the two of them, the decor of the cafe has no secrets to hide. "Maybe. I wouldn't know."

Joohyun is silent after that.

It begins like this:

There is this one girl that joins the company. She is quietly beautiful and full of poise, cautious with a pointed determination in the way she observes and takes everything in. She reminds seventeen-year-old Seulgi of a raven.

"This is Joohyun, by the way." Their dance instructor says when the session of the day finally draws to a close, and then there is a name. "She'll be joining us tomorrow onwards."

They hadn't been friends back then, just two fellow competitors in the fight to claw to the top, and she had merely added to lukewarm welcomes with hellos of her own. She had only noticed the inscription above Joohyun's ankle when somebody pointed it out, barely visible over the lip of her sneakers.

"There's no way that isn't her mark." Seungyeon had murmured with a hint of wonder, and she remembers humming in acknowledgment. "She must have gotten it early."

The topic is forgotten until months later when Joohyun is now bordering the line between acquaintance and friend. They are sitting in the small common room all female trainees share, winding down for the day. 

"God, my feet hurt." The older girl wastes no time in kicking off her shoes and removing her socks. She sits and methodically stretches each leg, the black ink on her left Achilles tendon dark under fluorescent white light. 

It is a gorgeous feathered wing curled upwards at its tip, detailed little lines stretching from the base of her ankle to the back of her foot, and the way it bends and stretches on smooth skin transfixes her so. 

The movement pauses and she glances back to Joohyun, one hand still clutching her heel as she stares at it with a listless expression.

Someone bumps into her from the back and seulgi instinctively shuffles forward. Joohyun continues stretching her leg.

"Hey, Hermes." Seulgi teases. Joohyun flinches as usual at the nickname. It is as painful as it is funny. 

They are older now, survivors instead of competitors on the trek to absolution. Joohyun still wears high-top sneakers and Seulgi fights against the urge to scream, lets her be instead. 

"Hi," Joohyun says, a little too casually. She drops down next to Seulgi, black henley sweater draped loosely over slender shoulders. "In the mood to eat?"

"Always." Seulgi relents, leaning against the mirrors that adorn the walls of the room. "How about Thai food?"

They discuss takeout and schedules and other ongoing events after that, Seulgi feigning ignorance as the tightness in Joohyun's shoulders relax over time. She'd gotten better at that recently, the pretending. No sign of the waves of pull that come and go. Perhaps this will tear her into two. 

Whatever it is, they don't talk about Joohyun's soulmate mark. They don't talk about the matching one on Seulgi's shoulder.

If stage persona Irene cared little for soulmates, Bae Joohyun cared even less so. They mean nothing, she would say, in a scathing tone similar to when she had told Seulgi of the separation between her parents so many years ago. She says it less now, with a kind of hesitation that Seulgi both cherishes and despises for the glimmer of hope it gives. 

Joohyun rebels and thinks of her destiny as her own, glides through the motions of living with genuine vulnerability and laughs at the idea of being unowned, but curls up on the sofa in the dorm and watches cheesy romance movies from twelve to two. It’s cute, she will protest and Sooyoung will agree from the other end of the couch, and she will stare almost defiantly at Seulgi across the room. It’s nice in theory, she challenges, and Seulgi wants to run over and run away in equal parts of fear.

She remembers the day she had quietly called Joohyun to the common bathroom. It was silent as the older girl skipped in with a nonchalance that faded quickly at her expression.

“Is something...?” She had wondered, morphing so quickly into the quiet concern that Seulgi had always adored. Joohyun is a raven, sharp and quick. She is a sparrow, fleeting and small. She is the girl with the Achilles foot, fearless and strong. She will always be there when you need her the most. She...

She says nothing when Seulgi tugs wordlessly on the back of her shirt, far enough to expose the curve of a matching feathered wing along the blade of her shoulder.

Sometimes, it comes close. 

She will be showing the group her sketches or helping her perfect a dance, and out of the corner of her eye spot Joohyun smiling softly at the side. She will be gifting her a little something extra in the quiet of Joohyun’s room post-birthday, a simple note and small Pikachu with a tiny rabbit hat. Behind the amusement, there is a warmth and affection in that moment that serenades her closer. Joohyun will thank her and their hug will linger, then one of them will run. Fate must have given them fitting tattoos.

Back when things were simpler, when the storm had yet to strike, it was easier to ignore. 

They had been staying together in Shanghai to celebrate the new year when that was taken away from her, too -- The simplicity that came with being with Joohyun. There was a river, and soft music, and strings of bright light snaking from lamp post to post, and her ever-present attraction to Joohyun that was so hard to deny. The girl in question is leaning against a support rail, head tilted to the sky.

"I've always thought places like these were lies," She murmurs, barely audible as the people around them begin to count, in the moment so fresh-faced and filled with awe that under the moonlight she almost seemed to glow. "But here we are."

She turns to Seulgi then, smiles with her eyes and a look that says hello. She is so honest and vulnerable and pure, so striking that seulgi almost doesn't notice the heat that burns into her shoulder. Almost.

In that moment, she knows her fate is sealed. The new year begins with fireworks of more than one kind.

It’s raining when Seulgi wakes up in the middle of the night, wide awake and not at all. She is sitting up and staring at nothing in particular when a shadow slips past Seungwan’s half of their room and pads over to stand at the edge of her bed. Joohyun straddles her lap, legs on either side of Seulgi and scent a giveaway even before the brief flash of lightning had illuminated her figure. The sharp curve of her nose is so close to Seulgi’s own as she looms over the younger girl and though she chants internally a reminder to breathe, she is still rendered breathless when they kiss.

Joohyun presses softly against her once, then firmer as hands hold her steady. Seulgi lets the air get knocked out of her by their kisses and winds her fingers into soft hair in return, eyes shut to relish the sensations and not because she might cry. Joohyun makes a soft, gentle noise and pulls away the slightest to cup her cheek.

Seulgi says nothing and neither does she.

--

hi,:] will prob post a few that will be more slow-burn and plot-driven in the future! this was a warm-up...sorry im a little rusty! im at @joohyunned on twt if you want to yell at me though >:D hope it made at least some of u feel things. might update for detail. we'll see