3rd week

 

It is true that we should live our life to the fullest. We should do whatever makes us happy because we only live once. A mistake has a place called regrets, and learns from it. We can’t undo what we have said and done, that’s already part of our being as a whole. As we grow up, we became mature and wise as well. It’s not all about you now, it’s all about the reality that God has been letting us see but we refuse to acknowledge it.

 

There’s a lot of reason to be happy. We should not trim down small things just because big things might seem to be worth it. It will always be not like that. We enjoy the big ones, but the small ones would really make us appreciate life more. Travelling, leisure, material things… it’s a bonus in someone else’s life. If you have what it takes, then go for it. Happiness is all that matters in the end.

 

…

 

These past days have been so hard for Minjoo. Symptoms happen unexpectedly and in random times. She felt so useless and a big burden to Yujin. This is supposed to be her solo vacation but she ruined it. Minjoo is blaming herself, she wanted the doctor to be happy, but instead, she wants that happiness to herself.

 

In the past weeks that they’ve been together, Yujin saw how Minjoo battles the pain whenever she had attacks. She endured it so much. As a doctor, she can’t just give in but instead she should always shows her best to fight along with her patient. Just like how she manages to fight over stress, her unique ways helps Minjoo a lot. And she is so thankful on how she was taken care of by the young doctor.

 

She is so at ease that she could cry the pain out, and Yujin would just hug her so tight and sing a song for her as a lullaby. Her pain relievers would or would not lessen the pain now. It’s getting more crucial as days go by, but she still manages to smile even if she’s in pain. All she ever wanted now is to spend it so well with someone that she loves the most… Ahn Yujin.

 

…

 

“That’s our only option Minjoo-yah. We only could hope for a miracle now, but please choose what you think would make you feel comfortable. I am willingly giving you my support and you know that. Please be mindful of your medications okay?”

 

Dr. Kwon said to her after seeing the result of the latest MRI.

 

“I know doc, don’t worry I will take my meds of course”

 

Someone suddenly opens the door and just take a peak on Dr. Kwons’s office and just forgotten to knock at the door

 

“Unnie, do you have time today?”

 

Minjoo got curious just by hearing the voice of the person. She lifted her head and saw, Ahn Yujin.

 

That was the very first time she sees Yujin and after that it seems like a fond has grown in Minjoo’s that made her want to see the doctor every day. Since then an unsual changes develops on the girl and it’s a good one. Her attacks have been lessened and the pain is not that severe. She is very happy.

 

She has all the time but then she is so shy to introduce herself to the doctor. She has no guts so she just let it and didn’t force it. She hasn’t had any single conversation with Yujin, but then it just happened… is it possible that she would actually fall in love with the young doctor? It did happen. She fell and couldn’t do anything about it. What for? She already knows she is dying, there’s no purpose at all. Useless and definitely a hopeless.

 

Years have passed and her illness is getting more critical. Eunbi even added another dosage to her pain reliever. She already decided not to get a surgery, and told her parent’s about it. For Minjoo, she just wanted to die with her long hair and be pleasant when she dies. That surgery is an option anyway, there is no certainty that she will survive or what; she might actually die while the surgery is ongoing so it’s a no.

 

She has an appointment with her doctor, so she went there with a lunchbox with her. It’s filled with foods; it’s her way of saying thank you to Dr. Kwon for everything.

 

“I guess you wanted to say something to me, am I right Minjoo-ssi?” the doctor gives her a meaningful smile

 

She was undecided but cannot hold it back anymore, so she spilled the tea. Why not? There’s nothing to lose because she will then die soon

 

“Ah uhm. Can you help me with something? It’s only you that could help me…”

 

Dr. Kwon already knows it so she just does the talking instead

 

“Dr. Ahn, right?” she pauses and sighs “You wanted to meet her?”

 

Minjoo got flustered and looks down while her fingers are fidgeting

 

She smiles at the sight of a shy girl who has a thing on her friend.

 

“So what do you want me to do? Remember, I am here to support you. I wanted you to be happy, Minjoo-ssi.”

 

She couldn’t look straight at her doctor but she manages to tell her what she feels

 

“Y-Yes I-I do. I heard she’s having a vacation… Please make me in the same flight as her.”

 

“You’re actually risking your life now…”

 

“At least I’m going to see her. Might be spending it with her… I don’t care anymore Dr. Kwon. This is all I could ask for, being able to feel the worthy of my own happiness. My last shot in life before I die.”

 

…

 

“I am in love with someone whom I know you will be against with. There’s more about my own feelings that I’m scared to admit to you, mom dad. I am truly sorry about it, I really mean it. But no matter what I do to stop this, I still fall…”she stops and helplessly sighs “… I fall so hard that I don’t want to stop because I am really happy with it. And this makes me wants to fight and live more even though I know it’s hopeless. I just wanted to feel my own happiness before I die. I wanted to take a risk because no matter what might happen I know it will be worth it. This is all I could ask for, allow me to be happy while chasing my love; Dr. Ahn Yujin”

 

Minjoo thought that her parents will stop her from doing these things, but she is so blessed to have an understanding and supportive