Once it’s left my lips
The diamond will disappear soon
I’ll treasure it from today on
Like this, as much as I can
As the sea breeze blows
I want to make you mine
Longer than forever
12 seconds

12byou – HKT48

(A year after)

After that incident, I tried not to stalk you. But once in a while, I pass by your neighborhood just to get a glimpse of you. I found out from a friend of yours that you had new boyfriend. It hurts a lot Saku-chan. And to be honest, I want to die when I saw you in the arms of someone else.

He was a good guy. You brother told me that he was a childhood friend. He took care of you just like I did when we're together. But I guess, letting you find happiness is much more important. I don't hate you for not looking for me. That's for the best.

Months passed by then I found someone else too Saku-chan. She is not you but she is the closest person that can understand the weird me. A total opposite of you though. My good friend Hyewon was so against our relationship. She was so against me being with this girl. Always telling me that I should not use her to move on from you because I might hurt her. I know she doesn't deserve as a replacement for you. A band aid to a broken heart. Kwon Eunbi deserves more than that.

But the stupid me cannot really stop hurting people. Like what they say, Misery Loves Company. Because I was miserable longing for you, I needed someone to make me feel special. I needed Eunbi. She understood perfectly that I am still in the process of healing my wounds from our past. She's so patient with me.

While trying to start again, I heard you broke up with your childhood friend after 6 months of being together. Found another guy that gave your family a huge headache. And it did not end there. Every few months, you will broke up to each one of them. I lost count on how many hearts you broke. Hyewon told me that maybe you are looking for a piece of me in each one of them. And I thought of reaching out to you because you might hurt yourself more. But maybe you needed to find yourself first. Not until you had a relationship with a bad guy, that's when I tried to reach out to you once again. Your mother came to me and rant about how stubborn you are.

Flashback

“Chaeyeon my child, I can't take this anymore. Talk to Sakura please. She will listen to you. I will not accept that man. Never! Over my dead body!”

“Imo, why are you so worked up? I heard he treats Sakura well. Give the guy a chance.”

What can I say about this matter? Of all the people, it was me who shouldn't have a say about the matters of your heart. It was them who put both of us in our current state. You loving the wrong guy. Me, liking a person to get over you. I wanted to shout at your mother.

“WTF Mrs. Miyawaki!!!! You forced us to separate because I was not the right person for your daughter. Because I'm a girl! Because I'm someone who can't give you grandchildren. Now you are telling me to talk to your daughter about breaking up to the love of her life? Screw you! you!”

But I didn't.

Because I care about your mother too. While my Aunt Chaerin and my own mother were finding their happiness in life somewhere else, she replaced that motherly care that I was looking for. So I bit my tongue and told her I will try.

“Chaeyeon, just talk to Sakura please. I'm afraid that she might get pregnant early if she's into that guy.”

“What? No. You know your daughter. She is smart. I don't think she will do that.”

“That girl will be the death of me. Always defying me every chance she gets just because I stopped her from dating you...” she stopped talking. “I'm sorry. Ignore this ahjumma. ”

Are you doing this on purpose Sakura? Are you really giving problems because of what happened? Why are you hurting yourself?

So I talked to you.

“It's been a long time Lee Chaeyeon.” I made a new yahoo account because you ignored my messages. But it was a surprise when you went online and talked to me.

“Why so formal Miyawaki Sakura?”

“Seriously, what do you want?” Cold. Your are colder than ever before.

“I talked to your mother.”

“If you are just going to tell me to leave my boyfriend then stop. I will not listen to you. You of all people do not have any rights to tell me what to do. I'm old enough to make decisions for myself thank you very much.”

“Do you really love him?” I had to ask. I need to know if I have a tiny bit chance.

“What if I really do? It has nothing to do with you. Just mind your own business Chaeyeon. Stop talking to me. Let's ignore each other forever.”

“Please go back to me. Leave him and be with me again Sakura.”

“Chaeyeon...”

I was filled with desperation.

---------------------------------------------------

(Few more ye