The rose scent filled her nose as she sat by the counter, seamlessly wondering about how different her life would be if she actually listened to her mother, not going for the art career- going for the cliche medical degree instead.

But there was no turning back now.

Choi Jisu was no stranger to isolation, she was 24 years old and she still hadn’t seen the colours yet, so much to her parents dissapointment.

“What’s happened to you Julia? You were such a bright child,”

Sorry dad.

It was 1 AM and the 24 hour bakery was dead silent, the parisian themed bakery only filled with blinking lights and her co-worker, Yuna.

“YO JULES! WHATS GOOD! CHAERYEONG JUST HIT ME UP AND SAID SHE’S PICKING ME UP IN 5!! YOU OKAY ON YOUR OWN!?” Yuna asked from the kitchen, taking Julia out of her trance.

Yuna was one of those lucky souls that just happened to meet her soulmate in highschool, her and Chaeryeong have been together ever since. Yuna would always tell Julia about the colours, how each thing was different, how gradients worked and how the sky was the colour ‘blue’ and how cherry blossoms were ‘pink’.

Colours were very much foreign to Julia. All she knew were white and black. Patterns became her muse in art, though Yuna always commented that her paintings looked rather hectic.

But what was more foreign, was the sound of the bell at 1.15 AM.

“Heh, sorry boo but you’re going to have to take this one,” Yuna whispered into her ear as she hopped away, grabbing her coat as she silently bowed towards the customer, fleeing the scene.

Then again, there was silence.

“Hi! How can I help you?” Julia said in a slightly over enthusiastic tone, following the schematic ways the bakery chain taught her.

“One- uhhhh- iced cola,” the stranger said, clearly indecisive in the way she spoke.

The stranger was even, nervous?

“Anything else?”

“N-nothing,” the stranger looked as if she was about to explode, as if her entire life depended on he drink.

“That’ll be 5 dollars,” Lia said, putting on a fake smile for the fidgety customer.

Lia couldn't help but stare as the stranger, a young woman based on what she allowed to be revealed. Most probably a year or so older than her. The girl was rather tall when compared to Lia, and most of her body had warm clothes draped around her, only her eyes and hair exposed.

Her eyes though- they made Jisu-

Weak.

Literally- she felt like she wanted to throw up.

“Excuse me ma’am I need to-“

It was too late.

Somehow, Lia’s insides all fell out, her cheeseburger from earlier making its re-debut into the outside world.

No. No. No. No.

Sirens were wailing in Julia’s head as she became aware of the pain in stomach advancing upwards into her retina’s. Jisu's eyes stinging like mad as she toppled onto the floor, clutching her stomach and closing her eyes tightly as means to lessen the pain.

Why do my eyes hurt so much?

“Ma’am!! Are you okay?” the customer said, genuine concern laced into her tone.

Do I like fine? Ya dumb bij…..

“Please bear with me for a moment,” the stranger dropped her coat onto the floor, revealing a pure white doctors coat, hopping over into Julia’s side of the counter.

“What did you eat recently?” the one Julia assumed a doctor asked, gently tugging at Julia’s legs so she wasn’t clutching onto herself anymore.

“Ch- che- eseburger,” Julia choked out, her eyes shut tight in attempts to blink the pain away.

“Are you- lactose intolerant?” the doctor asked, which caused Julia’s eyes to shoot open, because she never considered the possibility. Well, she did have a strong hatred stir in her gut whenever she drank milk or coffee- but she always believed that it was because she was more of a tea person.

“I- don’t know,” Julia replied, feeling a little foolish about how she wasn’t even aware of her own bodily conditions at the age 24.

“Seriously? Ma’am- i’ll have you know that these things are very important- you can die if you’re not aware of simple things like this,” the doctor scolded, and Julia felt like cowering in the kitchen, full of shame.

“I’m sorry,” Lia croaked out, the pain in her eyes fading slightly when they met with the doctors- a kind of- soothing feeling replacing the pain instead.

Still no colours though.

The stranger most probably had light coloured eyes, Julia only able to see a light gray on her eyes. The stranger also had an odd pattern at the corner of her lip, upon closer inspection, the pattern was a simple scar- kinda y too. Though the strangers eyes still intrigued Julia, the light gray something she rarely saw. It was as if this person was giving her a glimpse into the world of colour.

“What colour are your eyes?” Julia blurted out, the doctor taken aback.

“Uhh- m- my friends say green,” the stranger said, nervousness suddenly waving over her.

Can she not-

“Oh, cool,”

“You- you can’t see colours?” The doctor asked, standing up as she took off the coat that was tainted with Julia’s leftovers.

“No,” Jisu replied sharply.

“Oh,” the stranger replied, dissatisfied.

The stranger dismissed herself, walking over to the fridge where she grabbed a can of coke. Quickly walking to a sofa, all in pure distress.

Julia stood up slowly, walking around to get rags and cleaning supplies as she cleaned after her mess, once in awhile taking glances at the stranger.

The stranger appeared to be doing paperwork, her face scrunched up as she continued to skim through the papers. The stranger was cute, in her white doctor clothes- it was the only colour Julia could see clearly- so it had always been her favourite.

“Uhh, Jisu-ssi!” The stranger called out from her seat after 10 minutes or so, shoving her papers away as she stood up, abruptly pulling out her wallet as she walked back to the cashier.

“Y- yes?” Julia replied, shocked by the sudden loud tone.

“I haven’t paid yet,”

“Oh- uh- how did you know my name?”

“On your tag,” the stranger pointed slowly to Julia’s tag, which was located at a rather private part of her upper half.

“Ahhhhh i- i see,” Jisu replied, a little taken aback at the fact this random cute doctor had been staring at her .

“Wait! I didn’t! I didn’t mean to stare it’s just you- you have a nice body,”  the stranger blurted out, flushing a fluorescent red as she became aware of what she said.

“It’s- it’s fine! Thanks- for the complement- its j- just-

-not a lot of cute girls walk in and say i have a nice body- thanks for noticing,” Julia said with a broad smile, finally getting someone to realise her great efforts at working out.

That $15 gym membership has payed off.

For a hot doctor has noticed her.

“Sorry- and- here’s the money,” the doctor said, almost shoving the money into her hands.

“Thanks doc,” Julia said in a slightly flirtatious tone, literally able to see the slight tint on the doctors face.

“Not an issue Jisu-ssi,” the doctor replied, walking backwards, away from to Julia. The stranger slowly picked up her stuff, inching slower and slower towards the exit.

“HEY DOC!” Julia called out, raising her hand, catching the leaving person's attention.

“Yes?”

“Come again kay?” Julia shot a smile at her, and the doctor chuckled at the odd girl who couldn’t see colours- who couldn’t see the beauty of the stars and trees.

But looking at it now, the girl herself was the epitome of beauty. Why would she care of colours? All she needed was a mirror.

The doctor smiled to herself, as she left the premise, the cold subsidizing already and the heavy snow were now just light spots of white.

Julia was left alone in the bakery again- wasting the night away until her next colleague arrived. Although she was alone for the night,

A night isn’t forever.

So screw her soulmate.

She found something better.

———————-

“That’s ridiculous Ryujin! How?” Julia cackled at the older girls blabbering about how a little girl somehow ate a whole battery.

“I have no clue- working in the emergency room is a lot of fun sometimes, but- kinda scary too,” the no longer a stranger- Ryujin, rubbed her forearms the the dry breeze of the winter air entered the bakery’s earnest interior.

It had been a few weeks after their first meeting, and Ryujin kept to her words, she came every night after her shift at the hospital and would sometimes even came in the daytime (though she stopped after she knew that Lia only worked the night shift) to stop by for coffee, but at night, there was only one order she had.

“Where’s my iced cola?”

“Oh gosh! Sorry sorry, you’re just too distracting!” Julia facepalmed as she realised she missed the older girl’s daily request, standing up to get the iced cola the doctor loved so much.

“Julia wait!” Ryujin called out, standing up abruptly as she followed Julia to the kitchen, the raven haired girl staring at her weirdly.

“What’s up? This attached already huh?” Julia teased, not able to see the red tint appear on Ryujin's face.

“I’ve told you that i’m new to the colours right?” Ryujin stated, her hand a little fidgety as Julia anticipated the girls next words.

“You said…. You were struggling in your art major because you couldn’t see them,”

“So, I was thinking we could uhh- help each other out?” Ryujin gave the waitress a loopy smiled as the offer lingered in the air, Julia chuckling at the adorable girl. Ryujin told Julia she had recently met her soulmate, in a nice restaurant where her soulmate was the head chef.

And of course, Ryujin wanted to impress her soulmate by being a ‘colour’ expert. It would make her look smarter than she already was.

“Sure!” Julia said with a slight pain in her tone.

Its for her soulmate. Not me.

“My stuffs upstairs- where I rent,” Julia said, pointing to a dusty set of stairs that Ryujin would not have approached if Julia didn’t invite her to.

“Well, let’s go!”

—————————

“That’s green,” Ryujin said, Lia squinting at the colours, still sometimes confused with them, even though her whole life centered around them.

If only you could make me see them.

“They don’t look like your eyes,”

“That’s a dark green- mine look like- that green,” Ryujin pointed to an ‘emerald green’ which Julia picked up like a magnet. She softly brushed it over the canvas, trying to build a rhythm, trying to find an idea.

But all Julia could look at was Ryujin.

She flung her brush to work, each pigment of colour Julia would never see touching the canvas- complementing each other perfectly.

On the canvas now was a gradient of green. Ranging from the top of the canvas, though there was still a lot to fill.

“What now?” Julia asked, lost.

“Uhh, well- theres a bunch of colours. But- black. Grey. I don’t know. Why don’t you paint something that relates to you? Why care about colours?”

“What?”

“I mean- why do you care about colours? Why not just paint? Paint from your own perspective of the world - tell a story about how colours don’t matter- it’s just the eyes seeing them that matter,”

“Stars will always be white, they’ll always shine. They’ll always be beautiful even if all you see around them- is black,” Ryujin said, looking to Julia fondly as the suggestion left her lips.

“I- that’s a pretty good- idea,” Julia said, her eyes turning into crescents as the idea clicked into her head, the cashier staring into her tiny window, unaware of the loving look Ryujin was giving her- as if she didn’t have a soulmate of her own.

“It is?!” Ryujin replied, excited that an idea of hers was validated. Because- well, most of her life, her artistic side constantly failed at most things.

And Julia- Lia could paint rainbows and galaxies without knowing what colour a banana was.

“Yeah, it’s a nice message to people who haven’t met their soulmate yet- or lost them,” Julia pointed out, smiling broadly to Ryujin.

Staring at her is better than staring at any colour the galaxy could contain.

“Oh cool then. Paint away- i’ll watch- if it gets to hectic then i’ll warn you,”

Why? Why are you so afraid?

————————

“What does your soulmate look like?” Lia asked as they both looked at the stars from the roof of the café- assured that no one would come in at this ungodly hour.

“She’s uhhhh- really pretty?”

She

“What do you mean she’s really pretty? I want like- pictures!”

“She’s uhh- pretty shy - don’t think she’d like me showing her off!” Ryujin protected herself.

“But Ryujinieee~” Julia clung onto the doctor, the older smiling at the contact.

“I’m not going to show you!”

“At least describe her!” Julia begged, snuggling into the blanket that was draped around the both of them.

“Ugh fine! She’s short, nerdy and dorky- with dark hair, the most beautiful blue eyes- i swear, her eyes could hold the stars and entire galaxies with her perfect eye smile,”

“Heh! I bet i look cuter! And blue eyes- are they really that beautiful?” Lia teased with a smirk, pushing the older slightly.

“They are Jules- they are,”

Julia was taken aback for a moment- because supposedly, your soulmate was supposed to be the most beautiful person in the world.

Why see colours when I can see the stars with you?

——————————

“HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT! SOMEONE LOVES YOU!” Julia shoved the doctor away, their screams probably heard by bystanders, though Jisu didn’t care anymore.

“BUT I LOVE YOU!”

“YOU’RE SO SELFISH!” Julia looked away from her forbidden lover, tears beginning to form in her eyes.

Somehow, in the midst of everything, with Ryujin having a soulmate- they fell in love- the impossible happening to them.

But Julia knew she’d have to return Ryujin someday. Ryujin wasn’t hers.

They weren’t destiny. They weren’t fated.

“ FATE, I LOVE YOU!” Ryujin screamed, pulling Julia by the wrist. But Julia pulled away roughly, not wanting to look at the doctor.

“No, no. I can’t steal you. You’re not mine. No matter how many times we say that- you’ll never be mine,”

“BUT I AM JISU! BELIEVE ME. YOU- YOU are my colour,” Ryujin was in tears, on the floor, begging Lia to believe her.

Why can’t you see?

“Ryujin,”

“I hate you,” Julia let the words leave - she couldn’t comprehend the older girls selfishness. When there was someone waiting for her at home. Where there was someone permanent for the both of them.

"Lia, please Lia. It's you. It'll only ever be you,"

Ryujin stared at her with a pair of eyes more broken than the plates that they threw in distress. It hurt her. It hurt them like the piercings of a burning spear, the sting left directly on her heart.

Why can’t you say?

“Goodbye. Ryujin,”

“Go home. Ryujin,”

“I- hate. You,” Lia said once again, this time- her tone more sure than ever.

Because if love was hate-

I hate you Ryu.

For making me fall in love- for making me feel colours i can never see in the first place.

“Why can’t you see?”

———————————

It had been 5 years since Julia last saw Ryujin. The now 29 year old Jisu had made it.

Specialising in a rather different art style- it caught the attention of many.

Art of The Colourless.

The exhibition had been a hit, thanks to the connections her lecturer had. And Julia’s most fine piece- the green thing. Ryujin.

It was just there, the most valuable- in dollars and in sentimental value - to Jisu.

A picture of Ryujin was just there. People unaware of the story behind it. The story behind her.

“Jisu-ssi- your doctor is here- he says there’s something extremely important,” her personal assistant tapped her on the shoulder, earning a scowl from the artist. She'd never been fully fond of doctors due to her previous experiences.

How can this be so important?

“Right, i’ll see him in a minute,”

Julia power walked towards the private room, slightly annoyed at the doctor for not informing her beforehand that he was going to show up.

“Julia-ssi!”

“Yes doctor! Please make it quick- as you can see- i’m quite busy today,”

“Yes, but this is crucial, ma’am- p- please take a look at this,”

The doctor handed her a file, Julia opening it hastily as she skimmed through the pages- the recent report of her check up was what it seemed to be.

“Sir I don’t really see the urgency-“

After years of never going to the doctor- never having enough money to get a full check up.

Its today. She finds out today.

She sees today.

CHOI JISU : SUFFERING FROM  

• TOTAL COLOUR BLINDNESS.

• LACTOSE INTOLERANCE.

Total. Colour. Blindness.

“Doctor,”

“Are my eyes blue?” Julia asked, reminiscing on a moment she held dear to her heart.

“Ugh fine! She’s short, nerdy and dorky- with dark hair, the most beautiful blue eyes- i swear, her eyes could hold the stars and entire galaxies with her perfect eye smile,”

The look Ryujin gave her in that moment. Could it be?

“Bluer than any sky i’ve ever seen Julia-ssi,”

———————————

“Now you can see Lia?”

“Can you see me?”