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Description

If falling in love with her best friend wasn't already scary enough, Heejin had the Really Strict Catholic upbringing and Good Catholic schooling to make it even worse.

 

aka homophobia, but, make it internalized.

Foreword

tw for Heavy homophobia, internalized homophobia, and homophobic language. there's also a small scene that constitutes ual harassment. i would normally mark where any tw's apply in a piece, but, the first three are going to be reoccurring themes/things. i'll mark the ual harassment one with one bold letter at the start and at the end of it, another bold letter

who'd have thought that all of my years of catholic schooling would be So Applicable. (i live and die for the irony that comes with me going to a catholic school for an x amount of years and then using that experience to write gay fanfiction alfjlaksjfdk)

the american schooling system is the basis to which im using here so just know that!

also...there's going to be some references to religion, catholicism, and attending catholic schools so if you find yourself confused, there's google and also me :)

shoutout to the "what if we kissed where he did it to em and we were both girls" tweet for inspiring me to write on this heavy topic. classic example of me Really stretching things out and making them my own.

~~~

as always, thank you for giving me your time and effort into reading. i would really appreciate feedback if you've tingz to say :D

reach me on twitter and cc @@kminjyus if you'd like :)

i don't normally get attached to the angst i write, but, for the first time, i found myself struggling to move forward with writing some scenes even if i wanted to because it pained me too much to even think about it, and nonetheless, write it. if you need someone to talk to, i'm always here to listen.

Comments

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hblake44
#1
Chapter 1: Beautiful story. Painful too, but the development was really well done. The internal conflicts and how they mixed with other things in Heejin’s life fit well together.
Thank you for writing yet another incredible story.
dimsumJon
#2
Chapter 1: Wow, I related a lot to this, mainly the faith portion. The more I tried to put more time to understand Christianity, the more it confused me and made even less sense. Ultimately I dropped it all together.

Anyways, the story was beautifully written and you can really feel struggles, turmoil, pain, and happiness, the characters were going through. Love love love this fic!
dearbyul
#3
Chapter 1: this was so beautiful, i can totally relate to those kind of self conflicts, amazing job author.
Ainelee
#4
Chapter 1: This rly hits hard. I grew up going to private schools and even though my first church was very open they still didn’t talk about lgbtq stuff was. And internalized homophobia is such a real and scary thing in private catholic schools it rly .
deceasedhoe #5
this is amazing
keeperacer9
#6
Chapter 1: This maybe only one chapter, but I feel like I read an entire book. I can tell you did your research on Catholicism and I hope more people will read this.
Greta_14 #7
this is the first time i've read a story by you and i'm pretty much stunned! I especially loved the way you portrayed their struggles, heejin's character was way too realistic and relatable, hyunjin was so sweet, it hit home and it hit my heart! i also think the pairing is very fitting for the plot. this is one of those fics that'll come into my mind randomly just because it was so good. keep it going!
stargazerboy
#8
Chapter 1: really amazing his work many emotions and a captivating plot, the funny thing is that I'm an atheist and I'm really not interested in anything religious lol
joguri_cheek
#9
Chapter 1: this took soo long to read but it was worth it.
the emotional roller coaster it took me on was amazing!
really good one shot!