1979

Luhan auditioned for the musical with hopes of landing on a role. Few minutes left before he gets called, he huffed to release tension and to calm his nerves.

"Number 52? You're next!" Luhan timidly entered the room with his back slightly slouched. He can't look straight unto the panels' eyes and had second thoughts when he saw how intimidating the judges were, but he cannot back out now. He gulped, hand rubbing the back of his neck.

"You can start," one of the judges signaled for him to sing. Luhan slowly lifted his head to look at them and cleared his throat, his palms profusely sweating. He was so nervous that he feared he'll pass out. He cannot do it. He isn't ready.

"We don't have all day," the lady clad in a black dress clicked her tongue in dismay.

It is only in his dreams where he performs in front of many people and Sehun is the only person who ever told him that he does it well, aside from his mother.

"Next!" the lady shrieked and Luhan's eyes widen. He should take this chance and show what he got.

"Wait! I'll do it." Luhan composed himself with a deep breath. He must do it for his dreams. This could be a start, a stepping stone towards his goals. He should believe in himself the same way Sehun believed in him.

甜蜜蜜

你笑得甜蜜蜜

As sweet as honey,

Your smile is as sweet as honey

Think of the times you are at your happiest, Sehun would always say. Luhan closed his eyes. He treasures every moment he shared with Sehun.

好像花儿开在春风里

开在春风里

Just like the way flowers bloom

In the spring breeze,

In the spring breeze

在哪里

在哪里见过你

I wonder where on earth

Where on earth have I seen you?

He unknowingly smiled, remembering the first time he dreamed of him.

你的笑容这样熟悉

我一时想不起

your smile is so familiar to me

but I still cannot remember where

With him, Luhan was able to do the impossible. He'll be forever thankful that once in his life, there's this person who showed him that he's greater than his fears. Luhan will love Sehun in every breath, in every beat of his heart.

啊在梦里

ah, in my dreams

Sehun is waiting for him at their usual spot like how he always did. He was calmly lying on the meadow with his eyes shut and Luhan slowly took light steps towards Sehun's direction. He surprised him by snuggling closer as he lay down beside the taller. Sehun flinched by the sudden contact and he chuckled as he enveloped Luhan in his arms, hugging him closely while the latter's head is resting on his chest.

"How was your day?"

"I didn't get the role I auditioned for," Luhan nibbled his lower lip, "But one of the judges told me that he is impressed by my voice. He handed me a business card and said that he'll be waiting for my call. Mr. Hao told me that he can see a bright future ahead of me and he is willing to manage my singing career."

"Isn't that great? This is it, Lu! You're finally taking a step closer to what you've always wanted," Sehun beamed, "I know you can do it. You'll be the world's greatest singer."

"I'm nervous," Luhan pouted, "Can I really be the world's greatest singer?"

"Of course. You are my greatest singer and the world will surely fall in love with you the same way I did. So, what did you sing for them?"

"I was supposed to sing The Moon Represents My Heart but Tian Mi Mi reminds me of you more. Either way, they are both Teresa's and I'm glad I can give justice to my favorites," Luhan sheepishly grinned.

"You like classics that much?"

"My father left home to serve the country as a soldier when we were in mainland. I got so lonely and my mother would sing Teresa Teng's songs to lull me to sleep," Luhan smiled fondly at the thought, "Mom raised me by herself during Cultural Revolution."

"Cultural Revolution?"

"Mm," Luhan nodded, "Some days, we had no food in our table due to poverty but whenever mom sings, I feel at ease, I forget how hungry I am. A year later after we resided in Taiwan, I had no idea that she was suffering from a fatal lung disease. She passed away and from then on, I lived alone. Whenever it gets sad, I listen to the songs she used to sing to me and somehow, I feel comforted."

There was silence and Luhan wondered why Sehun isn't saying anything.

"Sehunnie? Is there something wrong?"

"Nothing," Luhan missed how Sehun seemed so perplexed over the things he's been uttering. "Go on, just talk. I am listening."

"As I was saying, those songs ease me when I am troubled. I took an immediate liking to Tian mi mi the moment it has been released last February. I probably wouldn't be able to listen to it that much if I am still in China since some of the songs from Taiwan were banned in the mainland."

Sehun went strange and it bothers Luhan. He won't talk and he noticed how Sehun's embrace got a bit tighter.

Mr. Hao's assistant is a charming lady and Luhan could say so from the way she warmly welcomed Luhan in the office with such pure smile that he found himself returning the friendly gesture.

"Are you nervous?" Luhan slowly nodded. "You did so well. I heard you stand out in that audition."

His cheeks warmed up at the compliment and he grew flustered at the lady's direct gaze.

"Thank you," Luhan mumbled, fidgeting his fingers out of anxiousness. He got startled when Mr. Hao's secretary squealed and cupped his cheeks.

"You are so adorable," she cooed, "You look so tiny and soft. I'm way older than you so you address me as jie jie. If you'll be under Mr. Hao's care, I'll officially be your big sister! I'm thrilled. You're now my little Lu."

"Uhm," Luhan blinked, "Y-yes. Thank you, jie jie."

Contrary to his first impression, Mr. Hao is a humorous man in his late 60s. His boisterous laughter is something you won't expect from a man with an intimidating demeanor and he was actually soft-spoken that Luhan was able to relax a bit.

He sang again, per the man's request. Mr. Hao swore to make his name huge in the music industry and the plans Mr. Hao has for him sounds promising. Even though Luhan cannot still find confidence within himself, he was ecstatic by the thought of performing for real and being a singer he always dreamed of.

But then, everything comes with a price, the man told him. If he wants to be successful in the music scene, he must trust Mr. Hao with everything by following whatever he says. To be fair, he assured him that everything he'll ask Luhan to do is for the betterment of his career and he wouldn't do anything that will potentially cause harm to the young lad.

With Luhan agreeing with a light nod, Mr. Hao instructed his secretary to prepare the document Luhan is supposed to sign. The old man grinned as Luhan penned his signature on the document. Mr. Hao putted a tobacco in his mouth, eyeing the young lad with an odd smile on his face. The smoke he emitted made Luhan cough and the man chuckled as the deal has been settled.

Present time

The university librarian could still remember Sehun albeit him not visiting the old woman for years after he graduated from college. He gained an immediate access inside the library because he's close with the old librarian since he was in his junior year and the woman treated him so well like her own grandson. A wave of nostalgia swept him as he visited the university but he got no time to reminisce as he has wholly different purpose for being there.

A lot of things have been bothering him since his last conversation with Luhan. Sehun can avoid it but he can never deny the possibilities running in his head. With his hands turning cold, he slowly flipped the pages of the book, the Cultural Revolution movement in Mao's regime. Every turn felt like he's nearing to the truth he doesn't want to face.

Sehun bit his lower lip, his brows furrowing as his eyes laid on the words printed on the paper.

"--a movement formed in 1966 and ended in 1976," he mumbled. Sehun heaved a deep breath and shook his head. It can't be.

"There's no certainty that you'll get to see him. It's been, what? More than a decade since that 1970-something. And even if you'll meet again for real, he's already old. Waaaay too old for you," Chanyeol clicked his tongue, "You don't suit each other."

Sehun didn't pay him a heed. Chanyeol cleared his throat to get the other's attention but Sehun is ignoring him on purpose. He was on his desk, all eyes on the screen of his laptop, and nothing could disrupt him.

"February 1979," Sehun muttered, reading from his laptop in which he opened the internet browser to search for Tian mi mi. Luhan mentioned that the song was released in February but the way he said it, it seemed like the song was recent, when in fact, the song itself is years older than Sehun. If the song is dated 1979, then, Luhan must be living in a different period. Sehun bitterly chuckled, a lump forming on his throat. The epiphany weighed hard on his chest and it is suffocating him.

Why did their fates play at them like this?

"Forget him, Sehun."

If only it is that easy. If only he could let go of the only person which made him feel that he has a worth. But then, it is not and he can't. He cannot let go of Luhan, he cannot lose him. He doesn't want to lose him.

"I'll go to Taiwan. I'll find him."

"Sehun," Chanyeol is getting pissed. His friend is getting out of control over something that is nonsense. "It's not worth it! This Luhan is playing tricks on you and- "

"Lilia Wong," Sehun cuts him off, reading another article from another tab he opened, "Lilia Wong is a famous singer back in 80s."

There was a glint of hope and joy in Sehun's eyes and Chanyeol doesn't have the heart to rain on his parade, no matter how he wanted to wake his friend up from his illusion.

"Chanyeol," he eagerly showed the screen to his friend, "This Lilia Wong, she was Luhan's best friend. Chanyeol, Luhan told me a lot 'bout Lilia. She could lead me to him."

"Sehun," Chanyeol eyes soften seeing how his friend is determined to find Luhan. Sehun stood to get his phone from the mattress when it rang. He excused himself to answer a call.

Chanyeol took his place in front of the laptop and searched for the Lilia Wong his friend was talking about. She really is a famous singer whose song in 1979 turned to a major hit, gaining a lot of fans across the globe. His breath hitched as he saw another article related to the singer, published last month.

He clicked and scrolled through the page.

'A concert in commemoration of the late Lilia Wong on her 3rd death anniversary'

"Sehun, you seem so troubled," Luhan's face fell, noticing the heavy, brooding silence.

"Stay still and smile. This won't turn out nicely if you'll frown," Sehun cleared his throat, shading on Luhan's portrait to perfection. His model immediately pulled a stiff smile, Sehun can sense the worried gaze directed to him.

Few moments then he was through. Sehun putted down the charcoal pencil and admired his model behind the drawing board. His sketch could never give justice to Luhan's beauty, his love, his muse.

"Are you done?" Sehun slowly nodded, the corner of his lips curving upwards. Luhan abruptly left his spot and took steps closer to Sehun. He gasped as he saw his portrait, drawn perfectly by his beloved artist.

"I am not this beautiful," Luhan blurted out, gaining a chuckle from Sehun. He yelped when Sehun slid an arm around his waist and pulled him down so Luhan could sit on his lap.

"You are ethereal. You always take my breath away," Sehun planted a small kiss on his clothed shoulder.

"You really think so?"

"Even you get wrinkly and old, even your hair turns white and thinning," Sehun adoringly gazed at him, "You are still the most beautiful person I ever laid my eyes on." Luhan pursed his lips, stifling a smile, but a tinge of pink is evident on his cheeks.

"Mr. Hao dislikes it when the big sister at work calls me beautiful. Pretty guys are not appealing in the industry and he wants me to change my image," unknowingly, a pout made its way on Luhan's lips, a habit he tried to change but fails to do so, "But then, jie jie didn't stop comparing me to a white Calla lily. She said it symbolizes purity, innocence and beauty."

"Then, you are my Sweet Alyssum."

"Another flower," Luhan blinked, loosely wrapping his arms around Sehun's neck, his doe eyes fixed on him. "What does it symbolize?"

"A Sweet Alyssum means worth beyond beauty. You are my Sweet Alyssum. You are more than just a beauty and I love you, every inch of you."

Luhan flushed, melting under Sehun's loving gaze. He slowly leaned and connected their lips. Luhan loves Sehun too, even if he's awake, in every beat of his heart.

The sudden shift of place astounds them both as they found themselves in the middle of the plaza, with elders dancing to the beat of an instrumental music. Sehun laughed, remembering that everything is still a dream, just like how he's holding Luhan close to him.

Sehun's eyes remained on the doe eyed boy who was gleefully joining the crowd, dancing basic movements with the elderly, who, despite of their age, were enthusiastic and carefree. Sehun's faint smile slowly fell at a bitter reminder. They could only meet this way in their dreams.

Why did their time did not match?

"Sehun?" Luhan glanced at him, their eyes meeting as Sehun is intently staring at him.

"I'm sorry," he muttered. Luhan shook his head with an assuring smile.

"I'll be with you right here," Luhan held his hand, "Even on your lowest. We'll be on it together."

"On the 20th of April, what if we fail to see each other?" after all, they are living on a different time, "What if you won't see me?"

"Is that the reason why you're sad? If that's the case, then I'll be the one to find you! In Seoul, no?" Luhan beamed, his eyes forming into crescents. Sehun giggled at his optimism and it pains him at the same time to see how oblivious Luhan is to their ill fate, "I'll try to ask jie jie to help me escape so I can fly to Korea. We will meet for real, Sehunnie. So, you don't have to worry."

"Escape? Why do you need to escape?" Luhan noticeably stiffened at the mention of the same word that slipped from his own mouth. Sehun quirked a brow, Luhan's tried to dismiss the question with a nervous laugh. He reasoned out that he couldn't just leave his work due to Mr. Hao's strict conditions, but he reassured him that it is nothing serious and the man is just doing his job as his manager.

Sehun doesn't know why there is a squirmy sensation in the pit of his stomach. Luhan let go of his hand and proceed to dance with the ladies. The warmth brought by their linked hands was replaced by coldness as anxiety consumes him.

He is nervous to no extent, as if it’s like something bad is about to happen.

"Sehun," he whipped his head as he heard Luhan but he is nowhere in sight. The music stopped and the old women who were once dancing are slowly dissolving into thin air. The plaza was getting blurry and Sehun couldn't grasp what's happening but there is a need to find Luhan.

"Luhan?" he turned around but he couldn't see him anywhere. He grew agitated on his every step, yelling the doe eyed boy's name hoping that he could suddenly appear. "Don't go anywhere I couldn't see you!"

"Sehunnie," Luhan's endearing voice is already faint that Sehun doesn't know where to find him. It kept on chanting his name till it is completely inaudible.

"Luhan!" Sehun groaned, angry tears already forming in his eyes. He witnessed before his eyes how the whole plaza breaks into tiny fragments till it completely vanished. He fell into an abyss of complete darkness, cold and lonely. There is no pair of dark brown orbs and warm smile that would save him from falling apart.

April 18, 1979

The door is still locked from the outside because Mr. Hao forbid him to leave the room till he gets better. His throat isn't on a good condition due to his excessive coughing and high fever. After hard days of work, with him consistently meeting schedules, Luhan's immune system weakens. His poor eating habit also added up to his worsening state. Luhan couldn't do anything about it. Mr. Hao restricted him from eating before his performances.

Mr. Hao wasn't pleased to know that he fell ill because it means Luhan won't be able to comply to his work. He missed a scheduled guesting on a music bar and the man got furious over it. Mr. Hao shouted at him for being sickly, emphasizing that an amateur singer like Luhan doesn't deserve a spot in the industry, not when he's too fragile.

He cannot head to the hospital no matter how much he wanted to because Mr. Hao locked him up inside his room. The big sister, Mr. Hao's secretary, was the only person allowed to visit him and the lady is kind enough to nurse Luhan.

"Little Lu," Min Jung placed the bowl of porridge over the table, "Please eat something. I prepared this for you."

"Thank you, jie jie," Mr. Hao's secretary assisted him as Luhan walked towards the chair to sit. Although the proximity between his bed and the table isn't so far, it took a lot of effort for Luhan's weak limbs to move on a short distance. Luhan settled himself on his seat and took in a spoon full of porridge. The heat of the newly cooked soup provided comfort as it eased his empty stomach.

Min Jung stared at him worriedly, gently brushing his fringe off his eyes, "I'll call in a doctor and let's keep it from Mr. Hao, he doesn't need to know about this. You need to get cured." Luhan kept mum as he silently ate, not having enough energy to speak.

"Did you see him again in your dreams?" the question successfully caught Luhan's attention, gaining a light chuckle from Min Jung. The mere name can do wonders to the doe eyed boy. He has told her everything about Sehun which the lady didn't mind at all. Min Jung was actually the one pushing Luhan to tell her more of what happens in his dreams.

"I did," Luhan croaked and happily nodded albeit weak, his smile not reaching his eyes, "We were so happy. Sehun and I are close to seeing each other for real."

"I already booked a flight to Korea. On Thursday night, we'll be heading to Seoul to find the man of your dreams. Oh, the things I do for you, Little Lu."

"Thank you, jie jie, it really means a lot to me." Luhan placed the spoon down, the content of the bowl doesn't look appetizing anymore.

"What's wrong?"

"I am scared, jie jie. I'm afraid Mr. Hao will find out even before I could meet Sehun." He aggressively shook his head, strongly disliking the thought. "That cannot happen. Sehun and I need to see each other."

"Little Lu," Min Jung shushed him with a comforting hand on his back, softly caressing him till Luhan calms down, "Can you tell me what your plans are after finally meeting this guy?"

Luhan fiddled on the hem of his sweater, eyes trained on the floor, "I want to quit, jie jie. I love singing but I am already tired. Mr. Hao--he," he bit his lower lip, restraining himself from spilling out what he's been keeping to himself, "I want to start anew. I'll find a new job and I might just let go of my life-long dream to be a performer. Perhaps, it is not just for me. I am not meant to be a singer."

Luhan tugged his sleeve down to hide the huge bruise on his forearm, "I'll sort things out soon. For now, I just want to see Sehun."

"Have you already told him that you want to quit singing?"

"Not yet. It'll be hard for me cause he always believed in me. He is my strength. I don't want to disappoint him by giving up, but then, what can I do? I already feel so weary, jie jie."

"I understand. You don't need to explain further, Little Lu. Now, finish everything in the bowl and I'll pack our things for the trip."

April 19, 1979

Luhan trudged pass the staff as soon as the airing of the day's music show ended. He didn't mean to act rude by ignoring the water bottle being handed to him. It's just that he's too dizzy, his vision hazy, and his mind couldn't process anything at the moment. He might pass out anytime and he doesn't want to faint in the middle of the studio knowing he would make a lot of people worried. He isn't fully healed yet, but he mustered up all his strength to perform at the music show as it is the only way for Mr. Hao to release him from being locked up in his apartment.

"30 minutes before 9 in the evening, we will sneak out to catch our flight," he barely heard Min Jung’s voice as Luhan slumped down into the couch of the waiting room.

Exhausted and ill, Luhan was able to take a nap only to be stirred in his sleep when Mr. Hao shook his arm. He batted his eyes open, recomposing himself with a small yawn. Min Jung isn't around. Luhan sat reservedly in front of the older man, combing his disheveled hair with his fingers. He avoided Mr. Hao's intent stare at him because it is making him feel uneasy.

"I'll introduce you to my new talent. You'll be together on the same company from now on," Luhan rubbed his eyes with the back of his clenched fists, clearing his sight from the blur.

"Long time no see, Luhan," his breath hitched as he recognized the voice. Luhan doesn't need to look at the person to know who she is but he still took a glance to confirm it. He eyed the lady till he gets a proper look at her. There she really is, Lilia Wong.

"She told me about how you used to write songs for her. I know you'll make a good tandem." Luhan furrowed his brows at what Mr. Hao said. He never wrote songs for Lilia, she stole it from him. And yet again, Mr. Hao is implying how he should write for her. No, not should, must. Mr. Hao never considered his decision, manipulating everything by his own schemes.

Luhan stood firmly and eyed them straight, albeit his frail body is shaking for staying still.

"No."

"Can you say that again?" Mr. Hao was taken aback, "I think I heard it wrong." A dark aura surrounded the older man, his face contorting to a menacing look. He would lie if Luhan will say that he isn't scared but he already had enough.

"You heard it right, Mr. Hao. I won't write songs for Lilia. Every song I create is close to my heart. I don't want a person whom I don't trust to sing it." Luhan clenched his fists. He has always thought of his Sehun and his mom whenever he writes because they inspire him. He cannot entrust his treasure to a person who once stole his property.

Lilia scoffed, "Woah, being a singer does things to you. You can talk back now. You're still an amateur and you'll never reach my level."

"If that's the case, compose your own songs then. Make it a huge hit. Work on your career and stop stealing songs to get on top," Luhan smiled directly at her to annoy Lilia on purpose which he successfully did. The young lady is fuming, eyes glaring daggers at Luhan. The bluntness stunned Mr. Hao and he was silent as Luhan walked out of the room in a haste.

Luhan went back to his old place, yearning for the sense of security his home provides. He just feels safe staying in there because nobody, except Min Jung, knows that it is where he once lived. Good thing that his former landlord was considerate to let Luhan stay for the night in his old apartment unit.

He took a glimpse on his window, a frown appearing on his face. There are no stars tonight, the gloomy skies hinting a possible pour of rain. Luhan doesn't feel good as if it’s like something heavy is weighing down on him but he couldn't figure out why.

Tired and sleepy, he yawned and blinked a few times. As much as Luhan wanted to, he cannot sleep as Min Jung will arrive in an hour to fetch him for their trip. Tonight is their scheduled flight to Korea.

"Wait for me, Sehunnie."

Luhan's squinted his eyes and scanned the sky with hopes of spotting an area where a star might be visible. He beamed as he saw one, pointing it with his finger. When he almost gave up seeking for it as the rain pours, there was one star twinkling above, shining amidst the sea of darkness.

"Sehun," he mumbled, looking at the lone star, "I will wish for it every night, to all those stars I can see above. I will wish that this world will grant us another miracle and let us be together and happy. It doesn't matter how long it takes, even if I need to ask for it for days, for months, for years. I'll wait till the day that I would be by your side even if I am awake. I love you always, to the moon and back."

Luhan choked back his tears and caressed his chest when he felt an achy sensation. He couldn't fathom why he is nervous, why it felt like something isn't right.

The loud banging on his door startled Luhan, adding up to his crippling anxiety. He heard Min Jung cry his name, accompanied by her heavy knocks. Min Jung lunged herself towards Luhan as soon as the latter opened the door for her. She wrapped her arms around Luhan and cried on the crook of his neck. Luhan can't help but to panic as well when he can see how Min Jung is shaking in fear.

"What happened?" Luhan cupped her cheeks. It was when he wiped Min Jung's tears with the pad of his thumb when he noticed a huge bruise on the lower corner of her cheek. "Who did this to you?!"

"L-Little Lu," she croaked, a trace of tears all over her pale face, "We need to leave. Quick"

"What is happening, jie jie?"

"Here," she pulled away and fished something inside her pocket. Luhan gasped when Min Jung handed him his casette tape inside a plastic seal, his recordings that Mr. Hao has taken from him, "Mr. Hao and Lilia are planning to sabotage your career. They want to use your songs to give Lilia a big break in the industry then they'll throw you off after they use you."

Luhan clenched his fists, "was he the one who did this to you?"

Min Jung sniffed and nodded her head, tears falling down her cheeks.

"I told him that we are quitting. He got furious and he hit me. Mr. Hao, that monster, he said he won't let us off the hook. I immediately went here to tell you that he's going stop us and he already knows that we're leaving for Korea."

"We should go. We don't have much time."

They braved the heavy rain and left Luhan's old apartment. They ran hand in hand, both of them soaked. They stopped by at the waiting shed to shelter themselves from the strong winds. Luhan has been trembling in coldness, his shirt dripping wet.

"Little Lu, a friend of mine is waiting for us at the bus stop. He's going to help us. Our bags are already in his car. You stay here and I'll find him then we'll be back as soon as possible."

"Keep safe," Luhan said with a nod as she left. He rubbed his palms together to make heat then he placed it on his cheeks for warmth. It didn't take long when a car halted by the shed.

His breath hitched, his eyes widening at the familiar style of the crimson car. It couldn't be-

"You thought you can get away from me that easily?" Mr. Hao hollered as he hops off his vehicle. Luhan stiffened by every step the old man is taking towards him.

He doesn't want to suffer on his hands anymore.

Luhan ran away as fast as he could, his breathing ragged. He needs to get away from him before the older man completely ruins his life.

"Sehun, wait for me."

Mr. Hao drove fast to catch him. Luhan didn't look back even he can feel his feet giving up. He didn't stop running no matter how tired he is, no matter how the thick fog blocks his vision.

"Just a little bit more, Sehunnie. Just a little bit more."

It was another dream. Sehun cautiously ascended to the stage by the stairs. He's in the music hall, the place where he always sees his Luhan. There were no people, only a sound of classical music resonating in his ears.

"Luhan?" his voice echoed. He eagerly tried to find the presence of his dearest but to no avail. Sehun scanned the audience area from where he is standing but there was nothing, he is alone.

"Sehunnie?"

Sehun grinned as he heard that sweet voice that his heart could easily recognize. He turned around and was met by a hug. Sehun wrapped his arms around Luhan and buried his face on the crook of Luhan's neck.

"Am I late again?"

"No, you're just in time." both didn't part from their embrace and instead waltzed to the beat of the music.

"Sehun?"

"Mm?" Sehun lifted his head and longingly gazed at the orbs of his beloved.

"Can you promise me that you'll be happy?"

"As long as you're here. You are my happiness." Luhan frowned, tears forming in his doe eyes. He cleared his throat and smiled, hiding the sadness which Sehun didn't miss to see.

"What's wrong?"

"Can you still be happy even if we cannot be together anymore?" Sehun was taken aback. His brows furrowed, creases forming on his forehead. He pulled away and took a step back.

"That's not possible so please stop saying that."

"Sehun,"

"Why are you being like this? Did I do something wrong?" Sehun nibbled his lower lip, "I don't like it when you're acting that way. Tell me, what's wrong?"

"No, you didn't do anything wrong," Luhan shook his head, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand, "It’s just that we are impossible. Us. We cannot be together."

Did he already know that they're on a different period of time?

"I don't care. I do not care even if the world is against us as long as you're here. You're with me. Lu, please, don't do this to me."

"Live your dreams for yourself. Sehunnie, you've always depended your happiness on me," Luhan's voice breaks, "I am more than happy than I am able to bring a smile on your face but I want you to be genuinely happy. Not only because you have me, but also because you are you. I love you so much, my heart hurts."

"Lu," Sehun held back a sob. It's so painful. Luhan is his everything, he can't afford to lose him.

"I will love you in every life that I'll have. You are so dear to me and you'll always be in my heart, no matter how far apart we are."

"I will find you in our next lives. Regardless of what universe you are in. I will find you."

"Sehunnie, we might not see each other again and I want to say good bye. I need to go now."

"No. Don't leave me. Don't go anywhere." Sehun tried to stop him from going away but Luhan's hand slipped from his hold.

"I love you, Oh Sehun. Please, keep me in your memory."

"No! Don't leave me! Luhan! Don't leave me! Please!" Sehun kneeled to beg but Luhan vanished in a snap. Sehun let out a painful groan as he cried his heart out.

Shattered and in great pain.

It couldn't be the same. Not when Luhan's gone.

April 20, Present time

Mr. Oh, this is Mr. Byun's secretary. Mr. Byun and I have reached Taipei and we will be waiting for your call. The contract that you'll be signing has already been prepared. Have a safe trip to Taiwan.

The voice message ended with a beep.

"You'll be late if you'll keep on moping around." Sehun didn't budge, lifeless eyes staring straight at Luhan's portrait adjacent to his bed.

"I don't wanna go anymore."

"What?!" Chanyeol scowled, "Are you out of your mind?! This is a huge deal you'll be wasting!"

Sehun kept mum, angering Chanyeol.

"I had enough of you!" he threw the sketch across the room, hitting the wall in the process before it fell to the floor with a loud thud.

"What the hell is your problem?!" infuriated by what Chanyeol did, Sehun left his bed and grabbed Chanyeol by his collar. Jaw clenched, he restrained himself from hitting the other.

"Boys, boys, what is this all about?" the door opened, revealing Chanyeol's grandparents standing on the doorway. Chanyeol pushed Sehun with a glare and recomposed himself.

Grandma Park kneeled, took the portrait and clutched it near her chest, leaving all of them puzzled. They scrambled to help her stand when the old woman suddenly wailed. Chanyeol managed to assist his grandma towards the couch for her to sit. She didn't stop crying, uttering words that they could barely hear.

"Jung? Come on, hold your husband's hand and let's go back to our house." Grandma Park shook her head as she swatted the hand her husband held for her, away. She caressed the portrait with sorrow that is evident in her eyes.

"My Little Lu," Grandma Park cradled the sketchpad in her arms, "Jie jie is sorry, little Lu."

"Did you tell her anything 'bout Luhan?" Sehun's mouth was agape as he shook his head, answering Chanyeol. He slowly made his way to Grandma Park's side, too dumbstruck to grasp what's going on.

“He is Luhan," Sehun finally said. The old woman grinned hearing the name as she wiped the fat tears off her face.

"Mind," Chanyeol's grandmother pointed at her head, "Mind is weak. Can't remember. But here," she lightly tapped her chest, the side where her heart is, "he won't be forgotten."

Chanyeol sat at the arm rest of the couch, consoling his grandmother with a small kiss on her forehead. Sehun and him quietly listened to the old woman as she tells her story, her younger days that she spent with the young lad whom she treated as her younger brother, her Little Lu. Sehun was feeling mixed emotions bubbling up inside him. He wanted to be happy that there is someone connecting him to Luhan but it also hurts knowing how cruel the world is to his beloved. He struggled alone, strived to survive no matter how harsh things are for him. He was maltreated and the people took advantage of his innocence and pure heart.

Sehun clenched his fists, anger arising inside him. They all did Luhan bad. Those people fooled him, betrayed him. But what Sehun cannot accept is that he was not there to protect his love.

Luhan was alone.

Sehun didn't notice that he's been crying as Chanyeol's grandmother reminisces her remaining memories of the young lad with a pair of enchanting doe eyes.

Grandpa Park handed Sehun a letter which he immediately took from the old man's hold.

"Min Jung," Grandma Park said, referring to herself, "Min Jung is in pain. Her Little Lu just wanted to be a singer. He just dreamed but they had to ruin it. They are so cruel."

Sehun silently read the handwritten letter, the paper wrinkled and brown, old age noticeable from being kept for a long time.

His heart ached at every word. Sehun caressed the handwriting with the pad of his fingers. He cried; it is Luhan's letter for the guy whom he often sees in his dreams. It is for Sehun, the man whom he gave his heart to.

"How can be this possible," Sehun mumbled, tears continuously flowing from his eyes. It hurts so badly, he just wants to be with Luhan.

"I’m in a lot pain, thinking that Little Lu was never happy. Nobody remembered him, nobody acknowledged that he was the one behind those popular songs. But reading his letter," the old woman smiled, "I am relieved knowing that my Little Lu loved and was loved so dearly. He said he couldn't ask for more and one day, they'll see each other again. Somewhere only the two of them know. Somewhere they could be together."

Luhan didn't look back even he can hear the horn blaring louder, signifying that Mr. Hao's car is getting near him.

The rain poured heavily from the sky. Luhan plopped down as he fell limp to the ground. He lifted his head to feel the rain shower prickling his face. He stood with all his strength, his limbs shaking as tried to walk farther.

The car came gushing in a fast pace, hitting Luhan from behind. He toppled over the hood and smashed against glass in the process then he rolled down lifelessly. The harsh impact made him dizzy, blood from the cuts on his body streaming down to the wet concrete.

He's too weak to move but Luhan was able to smile one last time, muttering Sehun's name as he shut his eyes to sleep forever.

Sehun arrived in Taipei after 3 hours since he boarded the plane. Now that his sole purpose for being there is to sign a contract, he doesn't feel as alive as when he first planned to be in the foreign country. There is no purpose for staying anyway. Luhan's gone and he'll never see him again.

He lamented the loss of his love by strolling in different places. He walked pass the music hall where a concert in commemoration of the late Lilia Wong was being held. Sehun clicked his tongue bitterly as he read the words, "A legendary artist, the flower of the East, Lilia Wong," on the tarpaulin.

It should be his Luhan they are celebrating. Most of her songs were written by him after all. Lilia Wong might be buried with all the praises but she lived in a lie.

"I'll be there in a few. I'll just go somewhere," Sehun informed Mr. Byun's secretary as he answered the phone call.

Sehun was in awe as he stepped on the grounds of the meadow. It is exactly the same as how he dreamed of it. The scent, the ambiance, everything made him remember Luhan and their stolen moments.

"I am here," Sehun muttered as he lifted his head up to view the sky.

"Mr. Oh! I saw you heading here!" Sehun stiffened at the voice. His heart knows it well. He can't be wrong. He turned around and was met by that familiar pair of doe eyes and bright smile.

"Hello, I am Mr. Byun's secretary. It was nice meeting you in person."

Sehun longingly gazed at the lad across him. It is him. He chuckled, it is his love. There was something prickling his eyes.

"Oh, am I late?" the secretary pouted as he took a glance on his wrist watch.

"No, you're just in time."

-

END