When they first met, it wasn't the most remarkable of moments. Byulyi just happened to had forgotten her heels and the girl was kind enough to lend hers.

She looked so young and cute though, how was she supposed to know she was older than Byulyi?

And somehow Byulyi did something that annoyed her, if the tight grip on her shoulders was any indication. That stiff smile on her lips told her of a tide roiling beneath the surface, all the while a staff member took their picture, oblivious to it all.

Was it bad that Byulyi thought that the annoyed look on her face was cute?

Probably.

The girl's name is Kim Yongsun.

Wheein calls her Ms. Vegetable.

And as Byulyi watched Yongsun return to practicing her dance in front of the mirror, a girl group song blasting at full volume, she can't help but agree on Wheein's observation.

Still. Kim Yongsun is cute.

●☆●☆●

There was something about her that made it easy to approach her. Perhaps it was her youthful face, making her look like she's still in highschool, or the way she's able to entertain herself even most of those moments she's doing things by herself. Byulyi wasn't really one to talk to people first after all. Wheein and Hyejinie was a different topic entirely as she had already met them.

Byulyi also learned that Kim Yongsun is a smart girl, and that vacant look on her face while she's practicing in front of the piano isn't her with her mind in the clouds but instead her single-minded focus at the work at hand.

She was a bit quirky, now that Byulyi thought about it.

Sometimes she bursts out into a song right in a middle of a dance practice--that wasn't her trying to break the ice, but just a part of the quirks that makes up Kim Yongsun. She probably didn't know but it eased up the awkwardness between the trainees.

Sometimes Yongsun's lack of self-awareness made her worried about the girl--like those moments where she forgets to remove her contact lenses, or where she placed her shoes, or where she put her eyeglasses or her makeup kit. It was raising a primal instinct from Byulyi, making her to want to dote on her, to , to push her, to know what makes Kim Yongsun tick.

Her mind was moving into dangerous territory and for a moment her thoughts frightened her.

But as she hid Yongsun's phone, watching the girl make a mess of her stuff, Byulyi felt a bit heady-- knowing she was the one making the girl run around in circles looking for her phone.

And when she finally showed her, the slaps on her shoulder and that frustrated look on her face made her think it was all worth it.

○☆○☆○

There was something addicting about Yongsun's presence.

No, not just that. There was something about her that makes Byulyi feel at ease. After regularly spending their lunches together, Byulyi often times found herself engrossed in whatever topic Yongsun felt talking about.

Maybe it was how her eyes seemed to light up; or maybe the way her hands made these grand gestures; or maybe it was the way Yongsun tackles any hurdle with such passion that Byulyi finds herself breathless.

There was, if she thinks long and hard about it, a lot more than it meets the eye when it comes to Kim Yongsun.

So when Hyejinie asked her to live with her, the thought of living together with Yongsun immediately came to mind. Byulyi didn’t feel the need to hesitate, the thought excited her so much that she just went to Yongsun without asking Hyejinie if she was fine with it.

Fortunately, Hyejinie was more than glad to have their unnie living together with them.

They must’ve looked like idiots for jumping around in joy when Yongsun said yes.

Byulyi couldn’t find it in herself to care.

○☆○☆○

“You write your own rap?” It was more of question than a statement.

Byulyi looked up to see Yongsun leaning over her shoulder. She shifted to make it easier for Yongsun to see her notes. “Yeah, I do.”

“Whoa.” Byulyi felt a bit pleased when Yongsun plopped down next to her, their arms interlocking as Yongsun held one side of her notebook while she kept ahold of the other. “I thought… Well,  I hadn’t really thought about it.”

“You thought what? That someone writes them for me?” Byulyi asked. She didn’t feel offended, not really. It was easier to think that way after all.

“Yes,” Yongsun replied softly. She watched as Yongsun’s ears turned red, head dropping in embarrassment. Silence fell in between them. Byulyi watched as Yongsun mouthed a few passages, eyes darting across the page.

“Oh,” Yongsun started, looking back at her. “Can I hear you rap?”

“Okay, I guess.”

As Byulyi started, she can't help looking back and forth between Yongsun and her notes. suddenly felt tight and she could feel her hands getting clammy. She pinched herself when she wavered over a particularly fast passage. She can't help but feel a bit dumb over it.

When she finished, she couldn't bring herself to look at Yongsun and tried laughing it off.

“Wow, daebak.”

Her eyes darted up at her words. It felt like her heart was in as she met Yongsun's gaze. She was looking at her like she's seeing something for the first time.

“Is it okay?” She asked, finally finding her voice.

“Yes,” Yongsun nodded, absentmindedly pulling the hand that was pinching her side. Yongsun kept biting her lip, looking nervous. “Um, can you… after practice, I want to show you something.”

Byulyi blinked.

“Okay.”

Yongsun smiled. “Great!”

 

When they came home that evening, Yongsun immediately pulled Byulyi into her room. Yongsun motioned for her to take a seat on her bed.

“What did you want to show me?” It was something that had been eating her up during the rest of their practice and Byulyi's b with curiosity now that she's here in her room.

“It's something that I've been working on and seeing you make your own rap… makes me want to know what you think,” Yongsun explained, now holding a beat up notebook in her hands.

“Okay,” Byulyi patted the space next to her. Yongsun gingerly sat next to her, still holding on tight on her notebook. “Unnie?”

“Byul-ah,” Yongsun turned to her, face serious. “Don't hold back, okay? Just tell me what you think.” Byulyi opened . “Truthfully!” Yongsun added firmly.

“Alright, alright. Geez, unnie.”

When Byulyi opened the notebook, the first thing she noticed were the multiple erasures and the margins filled with notes and chords. It took a while before it clicked in her head. “Ah, you're composing?” she said, more of stating a fact than asking for confirmation. She found herself trying to play out the chords in her head, her eyes drinking up Yongsun's mind written down on that beaten up notebook.

“Sing it for me?”

Yongsun sputtered at the sudden request. Byulyi paused at her own words, wondering if she should rephrase her question. It must've sounded strange. Byulyi smiled sheepishly, “If you don't mind, unnie?”

“Okay.” Yongsun cleared --suddenly that hard-working trainee that she had always know turned into this shy girl whose eyes can't seem to settle between her notebook and Byulyi, red traveling from her cheeks to her ears. She sat up from her position as she turned towards Byulyi.

Byulyi can say she heard Yongsun sing a thousand times--or more like all the time. But there was something different about this moment.

A moment being shared between two people.

It didn't help that Yongsun's composition was good. It didn't matter if she kept clearing , or she kept repeating the same note over and over again.

Because right at this moment, Byulyi thought

“Beautiful.”

Byulyi didn't understand why Yongsun was suddenly slapping her shoulder and repeatedly saying that Byulyi was being weird. But as she looked at that face, cheeks puffed out and eyes dancing and bright, Byulyi can't help but think

Kim Yongsun is beautiful.

●☆●☆●

Somehow trying to get to know everything about Kim Yongsun turned to what are the things that Kim Yongsun only shares to her.

It should’ve worried her, how she was doing things she hadn’t done before, how she was trying to gauge every and any reaction that she could pull from Yongsun.

And sometimes, sometimes Byulyi push things too far. It was frightening how she started to see the signs, like when she knew she was pushing too far and when she just knew how to pull her back.

It was terrifying how Byulyi found it all addicting.

How her mind went from ‘She reacts so cutely’ to ‘I did this. I made her like this’.

And as her nails dug into her arms, Byulyi hated herself for it.

○☆○☆○

She thought it might be because she felt jealous of Yongsun. Who wouldn’t? She’s beautiful, she sings so well, everyone loves her, and everything she does, she does her best.

But as she cried her eyes out, heart open and bleeding--Yongsun was the one there holding her.

That was the first time, as she looked back on it, that the thought that she likes Kim Yongsun entered her mind.

The realization didn’t scare her as much as she thought it should.

●☆●☆●

It became something of a game to her--how much she could push before Yongsun realizes what she’s doing to her. It became somewhat of crutch to her as she sometimes finds herself drawn to Yongsun even at uncomfortable moments.

And somehow along the way, something started to change in how Yongsun responds to her. And like clockwork, that made her feel more drawn to her.

As the years passed, debuting, singing and spending more time than before, Byulyi felt more sure of herself in years.

She loves Kim Yongsun more than a friend ever should.

○☆○☆○

There were a lot of moments that the words nearly left her lips.

But there was something about today that made it different. Maybe it was the way how Yongsun invited her out, looking all shy and yet excited at the same time. Maybe it was the thought that she get to spend a whole day with only Yongsun at her side. Or maybe it was the way the Christmas lights shined on her hair that somehow, someway made her look like she’s covered in glitter.

And as they stood in the middle of the park, only her and Yongsun existed at this moment.

“Thank you,” she started, “I had fun today.

Byulyi found herself drowning in Yongsun’s presence as her eyes sparkled, a laugh on her lips and her arms around Byulyi's jacket. She was the most beautiful person she ever saw.

I did this, Byulyi thought, her chest warm and cheeks aching. This time she didn't try to stop the words from leaving her lips.

“Unnie, I like you."

And just like that, Yongsun froze, brows scrunching minutely. “Byul-ah, wh-what are you talking about?”

Byulyi placed a hand over Yongsun's, giving it a squeeze. “I like you, unnie.”

“Byul-ah…” Yongsun shook her head, snatching her hand away. “You- You can't do this. Why are you doing this?”

Byulyi shrugged, keeping that smirk on her face. “I don't hear a no."

Yongsun let out a frustrated noise between gritted teeth. “Moon Byulyi, you jerk-”

“Do you want to go out with me, unnie?”

Yongsun stared at her, mouth agape. “This is weird. I can't- I can't do this, Byul-ah,” she said, voice shaking. She whirled around, ready to run away.

“Yongsun,” Byulyi called out. Yongsun froze at her name, but kept her back towards her. “I'm not going to stop, just so you know.”

When Yongsun ran, Byulyi didn't try to stop her. Her nails dug crescents on her palms as she watched Yongsun's retreating back.

●☆●☆●

She kept replaying that moment inside her head.

After that disaster in the park, the rest of the night fell into a blur. Somehow she called Wheein out to drink. It was at that time she cursed the fact they were all living inside the same dorm--she didn’t have the courage to see Yongsun again so soon. So spending the rest of the night with Wheein felt like the next best course of action.

If Wheein noticed her horrible state, she didn’t mention it. Byulyi shared her day with Yongsun over multiple bottles of beer.

She had fun. Really.

Revealing her heart, however, wasn’t a fun experience.

Wheein, bless her soul, listened and Byulyi was glad for her presence.

And after all was said and done, Wheein said something that stuck out to her:

“If there’s something I learned from Yongsun-unnie, it’s that I should do my best on anything and everything.”

For the first time after that night, Byulyi felt relieved.

That’s right, I’m not going to stop. You taught me that, didn’t you, Yongsun?

○☆○☆○

If there was one thing that she learned from Kim Yongsun, it was that she was frustratingly vague with what she really felt.

It seemed that Yongsun felt it best to pretend that whatever happened that night didn’t happen, and it was rubbing her in the worst of ways.

But two can play that game.

Byulyi can confidently say that she upped the notch; and while Yongsun can be vague, Byulyi knew of her tells quite well.

Byulyi knew she was chipping away at that wall that Yongsun kept around herself. It was the way her eyes still lit up everytime Byulyi did something “weird” to her, or how her eyes seemed to burn everytime she was talking about another girl, or how she looks away everytime she started to get physical with their members. Wheein, it seemed, had said something to Hyejinie because it became a game of how much they can make Yongsun squirm.

Byulyi thought her actions to be quite petty. But to see Yongsun twisting and squirming made her feel good.

She must had chipped enough away on her walls to reach inside because Yongsun was pushing her against the door of their company’s restroom, lips pressing and tongue exploring so aggressively that Byulyi saw stars.

But it was still not enough for Byulyi to finally be inside Yongsun’s heart.

●☆●☆●

It must be her way of revenge.

Pulling her in then pushing her out.

Or it must be karma for all the Byulyi has done.

But she was already in too deep. She can’t find the strength to walk away.

She wanted the sun all to herself.

It was only fitting for her to burn.

○☆○☆○

How long are we going to do the same old song and dance?

Why did it have to be you, Kim Yongsun?

●☆●☆●

“I like you too, Moon Byulyi.”

To finally hear those words was like a balm to the wounds that they inflicted upon each other.

And for a moment, everything was perfect.

“You're the one cheering me on,
always in my heart
Your smile floats in my mind,
rain or shine…”

○☆○☆○

 

AN: It’s embarrassingly easy to get into Moonbyul’s headspace. This is definitely easier to write than Yongsun’s. Now I get why most authors write in Byul’s POV all the time.

So, I didn’t try repeating moments that Yong’s story already told and I had hoped to smooth things out with Byul’s story. I want to know what you guys feel about this! What are your thoughts? I would like to pick on your brains about this. And most of all, I hope you enjoyed it the way I enjoyed writing this!