It’s been a month Sooyoung routinely checked on her precious friend’s apartment. She was more than worry about the latter’s condition because her friend is smart, and surely, smart and dumb was only separated by a thin layer, she’s very sure if her friend would do something crazy if she didn’t do something before.

“Come on, I hate to seeing you like this. See?! your—ewww— underwear everywhere, you’re stinky! It’s not you— Oh my God, WHAT IS THIS?!” Sooyoung took a few empty bottles of sleeping pills. She couldn’t take it anymore, her best friend is suffering and he­­r heart was broke with this sight.

“I— Wendy eonni, can you look at me— for a moment? Please?” Sooyoung’s voice quivered. “I don’t come here every day to only greeted by silence or your heartbreaking cries— or your rambles about her, eonni. I’m not,” she added with keeping her serious face and firm tone.

The blond haired woman looked up and meets Sooyoung’s gaze then stood up and walked limply to the latter's direction. Clearly visible that she lost a lot of weight, she lost the stars in her eyes, she lost her light on her face, she lost her spark— she almost lost her life. And it broke Sooyoung's heart.

“Mianhae...,” She hugged Sooyoung as tight as she could, and like always Sooyoung’s anger vanished completely.

She patted the shorter girl’s head softly and returned the hug. “I bring breakfast and lunch, please eat it. You had hurt me because you didn’t touch the food I brought yesterday,” The latter begin to shed tears again, can’t stop the guilty feeling towards the younger woman.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry Young ah. I’m sorry’msorry’msorry...,” She said and ended with whispering in the other woman’s embrace.

"Sssh, it’s okay, I’m not mad. Just— eat it, okay?” Sooyoung said; waiting for Wendy’s answer, a simple nod would do, and Wendy did it. At least she won’t starve herself for today.

Sooyoung was right in front of the door now; she should go even though her heart doesn’t want to. Once again she took a glance at just-take-a-bath Wendy, who’s eating a rice bowl that she brought. “You...” she called and Wendy lifted her head.

“Ppali, come back to me; us. Everyone missed you, they really do, even our little Yeri is worry about you,” Sooyoung said and Wendy only nodded.

". Take care, office“Okay, since it’s 6.30, I should get going. I should check our branches before covering your work at the "eonni.” With that she’s gone, leaving Wendy alone in her room.

After a moment, when she was sure Sooyoung won't suddenly appear in front of her door, she spewing out the food in ; everything in her life is tasteless and grey now. The colors of her life were gone and didn’t give back her colors. Once again, a lone tear escaped from her eyes.

No, I can’t make Sooyoung disappointed in me anymore!

The more she hides it, the more she holds it, the unstoppable tears flowing swiftly. Even though she closed her eyes tightly, even though she wiped her tears with the sleeves of her shirt, the shadow keep coming to her mind.

Sobs became a heart-wrenching cry. Her hands gripped the bowl tightly until her knuckles turned white.

“Joohyun ah...”

.

.

Every day feels like hell for Wendy.

In her world, the rainbow lost its colors, the rain lost its rhythm, the sun lost its warmth. God knows how she wanted to die right now. Being the golden-hearted woman, she blamed herself and drowns in the hole of despair instead of blame Joohyun for all of this.

Every day she would face the mirror and tried to put a smile on her face.

But she couldn’t.

The smile won’t reach her eyes; the smile didn’t reach her heart. it’s hard for her to do anything, even for a simple thing. One thing that she could do for sure, seeking help from liquor that burned her inside and took her to the other world, where she could forget all of her misery.

She has responsibilities, yet she ignored it.

She has her life, and she had lost it in the day she lost Joohyun from her embrace.

She didn’t care about the world anymore.

She disappointed the people who love her unconditionally.

And Sooyoung was one of them.

Once again, Wendy tried to face the mirror. She saw someone. Someone who’s not her, full of misery face, dark eye bags were circling below the eyes, the dry lips which always called out the name that will never come back.

Crackkkk!

She looked down at her wounded knuckles. She felt nothing (compared to her broken heart) even though th