eunwoo wonders, briefly, if vowing to follow zhou jieqiong to the literal ends of the earth, to her near demise, just to keep her safe, is worth it. she wonders if, by chance, almost having her handed to her on multiple occasions—from actual trained killers who know how to handle the weapons they wield to random drunk patrons in a bar with brass knuckles and a bone to pick—is worth it, either. she wonders, if the almost euphoric smile that pulls at jieqiong’s thin lips whenever eunwoo manages to clumsily imbed her knife into a mans back, her own chest heaving and hands shaking, is worth it at all.

but.

when jieqiong pulls her into a kiss (there are two bodies at their feet and a third sagging against a tree with a bullet in his head—far from romantic, but that never stops jieqiong) with a gleam in her eye, sin on her tongue, and fresh blood still splattered across eunwoo’s face, she thinks that maybe it is worth it after all.

“you did amazing, baby,” jieqiong whispers as they part for a fleeting moment before she’s diving in for more, fingers digging into the small sliver of skin that peeks out from beneath eunwoo’s shirt. it tickles, just enough for eunwoo to huff a laugh against jieqiong’s mouth, and it’s all that’s needed before there are fingers digging at her sides incessantly, purposely, trying to pull a laugh from bruised lips.

(faintly, it reminds eunwoo of when she was young. of random tickle fights during sleepovers back when jieqiong could barely communicate with her in full sentences. back when their biggest burden was how they’d get to the top of the old willow tree in nayoung’s backyard.

back when i’d kill for you was nothing more than a silly phrase to get jieqiong to smile after someone said something mean to her, rather than a promise between them.)

eunwoo screaming mercy and promising to buy their next meal is all it takes for jieqiong to give her a breather, but there’s a smile on her lips and her fingers still absently skim across eunwoo’s abdomen as she catches her breath. it’s moments like these, when they’re only eunwoo and jieqiong, that makes eunwoo happiest. sure, there are bodies around them, jieqiong’s got a fresh cut against her cheek, and eunwoo can feel blood that isn’t hers drying and crusting against the side of her face, but this moment is theirs.

she at her thumb and wipes at jieqiong’s cheek gently (she pointedly ignores the voice in her head that strangely sounds like minkyung telling her how gross that is—but she doesn’t care; she saw it in a movie once and it seemed oddly romantic and intimate!) and sticks her tongue out when jieqiong teasingly makes a move to nip at her hand. that same gleam is still in jieqiong’s eye, the gleam that loves the chaos and thrill that comes with what they do, but there’s also a shine that settles there that reminds eunwoo of the first time they held hands and it meant something.

not that this isn’t adorable or anything, siyeon’s familiar monotone voice drawls in their ears, effectively pulling eunwoo back into the moment, but could you two shoot cute main character heart eyes at each other when we aren’t in the middle of a mission?

jieqiong giggles at that and eunwoo feels her heart swell at the sound, eyes following the younger girl as she steps away and pulls eunwoo’s long forgotten knife from the back of the man at their feet. she pouts as she inspects it, mumbling something about a knick in the blade and promising to get eunwoo another for their anniversary (when anniversaries went from flowers and dinner to new knives and guns, she’ll never know) and takes her hand with a smile.

she hears siyeon’s muffled voice crackling through her ears again, something along the lines of eunwoo says she’s buying dinner, everyone get something expensive! but ignores in in favor of watching jieqiong as she leads her back toward the van parked a few blocks away, the bounce in her step a stark contrast to everything else. it’s light and airy and bubbly and everything that is jieqiong and everything that makes eunwoo love her despite the lives they all lead.

eunwoo squeezes her hand. jieqiong squeezes back without hesitation.

it’s all definitely worth it.