Arriving back at their dorm, Seulgi immediately take off her shoes and get inside her room wordlessly.

She doesn’t even bother to say good night to her members and managers. Which is weird because that cheerful-full of smiles-bear always full of affections toward people around her. Even when she’s dead tired, she will always find the remaining energy inside her to at least throw a small smile to her members and bid them good night. Because they are the people that stay closest to her heart along with her family. But not today. And that’s surely worried the eldest. 

“Seungwan-ah..” Irene tentatively taps Wendy’s shoulder. 

“Yes?” The Canadian asked in her perfect English accent, emphasizing on the ‘s’. 

“Do you know what’s wrong with your friend? She acted weird. With her mood swings and all. She’s not even on her period.”

“First of all, no unnie. Unfortunately i don’t know what’s wrong with my dear friend. Aaaand aren’t you supposed to know better than me since you are her girlfriend?”

“I.. i’m not sure this time. I mean she was fine this morning before we went to the live recording. She was a bit cranky but that’s because she felt sleepy and hungry. Which is normal. But her mood swing now. And the way she tried to avoid me all day, something is surely wrong. With her. With us.” Irene let out a long sigh. Looking so troubled. 

“Aww, don’t be sad, unnie. I believe she’ll come around. You know her. You know how much she loves you. She won’t stay away from you forever. That’s for sure. ‘Cos she can’t!” Wendy tried her best to light up the somber mood. 

“She might not stay away too long from me but how long she’ll be away? As stupid as it might sounds, i miss her already, Seungwan-ah.”

“Then just go to her room and talk it out with her.”

“No, not now. She obviously wants to be alone right now. And it’s only right to give her that personal space.”

“If you think so. Now now, you should wash up and go to bed too, unnie. We have a super early pre-recording for another music show tomorrow mor- ah no. It’s midnight already. We’ll have another pre-recording today, in a few hours to be exact. So go nap nap!” Wendy lunged forward to envelope the older girl into a warm big hug. 

“Okay. Good night, Seungwan.” Irene said as she hug Wendy back and give the younger girl a soft pat on her back. 

“Good night, unnie.”

***

03.15 AM

“Seungwan..” Irene softly called out as she lightly shake Wendy’s body under the blanket. 

“Hmm?” Wendy sleepily replied with one lazy eye opened to look at the intruder in he room. “Unnie? Why you’re h-here? Hoaamm~” She let out a yawn. 

“I— i’m waking you up. Sooyoung and Yerim already wake up too. Could you please check on Seul? I’m afraid she overslept.”

“Why won’t you check on her by yourself, unnie? Don’t get me wrong. I don’t mind to check on my ex.. ex roommate i mean. No need to give me that cold glare. Where was i? Ah, i don’t mind to check on my ex roommate but i think it’ll be better if you do that instead of me. You two should face each other instead of keep avoiding each other.”

“I’m afraid she’s not ready to talk about it.”

“And you’ll never know whether she’s ready or not if you didn’t ask her. Go ask her. It’s just Seulgi. Our Seulgi won’t hurt you on purpose. So when she does, confront her. Because she must hate it too if she knows she hurts you. That kid loves you the most. So hurting you must be the last thing she would do. I know it’s not Seulgi that you scared of right now. It’s something else right? But whatever it is, avoiding the problem won’t do any good. It will only drag the problem further.”

“You’re right. T-thanks for this pep talk. You should get ready too. I’ll see you guys soon.” Wendy nodded and give the leader two thumbs up to encourage her. 

(In front of Seulgi’s room)

*knock knock*

Irene knocked on the door surface twice. 

“Come in.” Seulgi hoarse voice can be heard from inside. 

“Hi.” Seulgi’s eyes momentarily widened as she sees the person behind her door. Surely she didn’t expect to see the older girl at this moment. But she quickly put her poker face back on a second later. 

“Hi.” She shortly replied. 

“Sorry, I-i just want to check on you. To make sure that you already awake.” Irene cursed herself for acting this timid and polite in front of her own freaking girlfriend. 

“Ah i see. Thank you. For checking on me. As you can see, i’m wide awake.” Seulgi forced out a smile. Little did she knows, Irene easily realize how she faked her smile. And it hurts Irene to the core.

“No no. You should not break down and cry now, Bae Joohyun.” Irene inwardly told herself. 

“Erm, i’ll go to the bathroom now.” Seulgi must feel the tension too between them. And she hates it. So she quickly tried to run away, again, from the love of her life. 

“Wait!” But Irene is faster than her. Before Seulgi can open the door, Irene run toward her and crashed their bodies together, pulling Seulgi into a tight-possessive back hug.

The way she hugs Seulgi right now is as if her life is dependent on it, so desperate yet so heartbreakingly. 

“Seul.. w-what’s wrong with you? What’s wrong with us? It scares me! The way you acted scares me.” The leader rarely lose her cool. She tends to always calm and composed. But there were times when she finally breakdown and crumbled. Mostly when it comes to Seulgi, her kryptonite.

“A-Are you bored of me already?” She sobs. “Are you falling for someone else? That’s why you keep on avoiding me because you’re feeling guilty to me?”

Irene finally let all the truth out. This is actually the main reason why she didn’t immediately confront Seulgi.

Because she herself afraid to hear the answer from Seulgi. She’s freaking afraid that what Seulgi said is just a confirmation to her fear. That the younger girl already get bored and tired of her, or maybe falling out of love? Or even worse, falling for someone else who is not Irene. 

Seulgi is froze on her spot, all tense and speechless. Of course it scares Irene even more. As if Seulgi’s silence is confirming what she just said. 

“Please no, Seul. Please say that i’m wrong. Please. I’m begging you. I promise i’ll fix whatever it is. I’ll fix us. I’ll make you love me again. J-just please, don’t leave m—“ Irene words get muffled as Seulgi turned her body around with a bit force since Irene is holding onto her so tight, and silence the older girl’s desperate blabbers with a deep kiss. 

That’s her answer. 

Seulgi kiss her with so much love and passion. Tender yet rough. Innocent yet intimate. 

But Seulgi abruptly stopped kissing Irene when she can taste the saltiness that coming from Irene’s tears. Seulgi breaks down too into tears when the realization hits her. Her stupidness cause Irene pain. She makes Irene cry. Now she hates herself for that. 

“I’m sorry, unnie. I’m so sorry. Please stop your plea. And please don’t cry. It hurts me so much to see you cry. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel like that.” She cries. 

“So what is it, Seul? Why you suddenly give me a cold shoulder and avoided me? What did i do wrong?” The kiss might reassured her restless heart. Through that kiss they just shared, she can feel Seulgi’s unchanging love for her. The younger girl still love her the same. Still that much. But she still wants an explanation. As to why Seulgi did what she did.

“Nothing. You did nothing wrong. It’s just me and my stupid jealousy. It’s all my fault.” Seulgi admitted. 

“H-huh? What jealousy?” Irene wiped away her tears and try her best to stop her tears before she help her lover too by kissing away the tears from her eyes and pulled her into a comforting hug. 

“What is it, Seulgi-yah? What do you mean by that?”

“I-i saw how you run back to the stage that day, to get her.”

Her. No name mentioned yet but Irene get it already. 

“I was waiting for you down there, so we can go to the waiting room together like what we always do. But you never come. When i turn around, i saw you and her, talking and laughing at each other. You even offered your hand for her to hold. You rarely did that to someone else who is not our members. But you did that for her. Then i saw you walked down the stage with her, with a big smile on your face. Just like the way you usually smiled at me. And then i saw those articles, those pictures, those comments about you and her. You who gave her an intimate back hug. You who accompany and taking care of her. They love it when you two are together like that. They dubbed you two as a cute couple. They ship you two. I was burning in jealousy. But i try to held in it. But just yesterday it happened again. You go as far as talking to our managers to get our company approval to change a part of your choreo with hers, as your way to support her. She uploaded the sweet moment when you run to give her a hug to her Instagram. I—i just can’t deal with it. I tried, i swear i tried, but it’s so hard.” Seulgi paused to catch her breath. Without she realized it, she spoke so fast and it kinda exhausts her, emotionally. 

“And at the end, the demon inside of me win. So i tried my best to avoid you because i’m afraid i might hurt you, no not physically hurt you because i will never ever do that even if someone’s aiming a gun at me and ask me to do that, i will never do that to you. But i’m afraid i might say hurtful things to you and make you sad. Things that i didn’t really mean it. Things that come out of my mouth out of anger. I don’t want that so i avoided you at all costs. To protect you. But guess i hurt you anyway. I made you cry. I’m so sorry, Joohyun unnie.” Seulgi cries harder in Irene’s embrace, wetting the clothed part of the older girl’s left shoulder. 

“Ssshh.” Irene hugs her tighter and her hair lovingly. “It’s okay. Gwaenchana. Love supposed to hurt sometimes. And i’m hurting you too, even though i didn’t intend it.”

“I’m sorry that i didn’t realize it sooner. How you’re hurting because of me.”

“About her.. she’s just a close dongsaeng to me. I take care of her like i’m taking care of Yerim and Sooyoung. And besides, the reason why i run to the stage to take her and walk her down with me because i can imagine how lonely it must be for her by being alone like that without her members. With so many strangers around her. I went to her waiting room just to check on her and have a little chit chat with her, that’s when she took the picture of me hugging her, because she felt grateful to me.”

“And there’s another reason as to why i went there. I’m doing a favor for a friend. That whipped Kim Jisoo personally contact me and asking it as a favor to me. How can i say no to that? Jisoo is a nice girl. If i were her, i guess would do the same. I will try my best to make sure that my girlfriend won’t be lonely when i can’t be there with her. I tried to put myself in her shoes and i immediately agree because i try to pictured it as you and me. If you are doing solo, and i can’t be there with you, i think i’ll be just as whipped as Kim Jisoo, or even worse than her. Begging to people to look after my girlfriend and accompany her so she won’t feel too lonely.”

Now Seulgi finally get it. Completely get it as she finally sees the whole picture. She can understand Irene’s heart.

Irene.. She might looks cold on the outside, like someone that is hard to approach but once she open up herself to you, you’ll always feel her warmth. Always. 

And Jennie, that girl took the first step by approaching Irene first and turned out they are clicked in no time. 

Seulgi actually glad that her unnie can befriended and get close with someone else outside her group mates. Because she knows how timid and quiet Irene can be in front of stranger. The fact that she finally opened up is a good thing. 

But still, jealousy can be hard to deal with sometimes. Especially when you have a perfect girlfriend with goddess-like features like Irene. Everyone wants her. 

But now after hearing Irene’s explanation, Seulgi can see that there’s nothing to worry about. She and Jennie are just close friends. Close dongsaeng-unnie. And Jennie has Jisoo who loves her like a fool. Well, she can tell that Jennie does the same for the older too. They are both whipped for each other. Just like Irene and Seulgi. 

“Fine, i get it. I’m sorry for my stupid jealousy issue.” Seulgi cutely huffed with her puffy eyes. 

Irene can’t help but to giggled as she’s admiring her girlfriend’s cuteness. She can’t stop herself from giving a few pecks on the bear’s cheeks and nose. 

“It’s okay, baby. I’m glad that we finally come clean about this. So the next time you see me and Jennie together again, being close or even have a moment, you won’t be upset again right?”

Seulgi thinks for a while as she’s contemplating her answer. 

“I think... i won’t. Because i’ll make my moment too with Jisoo. You know that there are quite a lot people out there that shipping me and Jisoo right? SooSeul isn’t it? No.. doesn’t seems right. Ah Jiseul! The ships in BlackVelvet will all sail.” Seulgi widely grinned as if she just suggested the most brilliant idea. 

And now the table has turned. 

“Yah! Why you even know your ship name with Jisoo?! No no! I won’t let that happened. I always knew it. You always look at Jisoo with that hearty eyes of yours. I should have realized this sooner. The next time we meet Blackpink, i’ll keep an eye close on you so don’t you dare to do anything funny with Jisoo! I—“

“Unniedeul?” The convo between them has to get halted as Yerim’s head suddenly popped in between the door’s gap. “What the?? Why you two are still in pajamas???”

“We—“

“Ppalli! You now only have 10 mins to get ready. Move move!!” The maknae on top commands. 

And Seulgi wittily used that chance to slipped away from Irene’s grip. 

“Ah okay, Yerm! Coming~” She suddenly announced and run as fast as she can. Leaving the dumbfounded rabbit behind her. 

“Yah Kang Seulgi! Come back here. We haven’t finished our talk. Yah!”