“Dude, so what are you coming or are you cancelling on me again?”

Sehun, who is on the phone with his good college friend: Hwang Hyeonhu, picks up his keys from his hallway table. He rolls his eyes upon hearing what his friend said, answering, “Again? This is just the third time.”

The man on the other line snorts. “The third time if you’re not going to come.” He pushes, “Come on, I’m back from Europe after a while.”

“I am on my way.” He mutters nonchalantly.

“Great, see you then!”

And with that, the phone call ends. Sehun leaves his flat. The lights on his whole place turns off, leaving the area pitch black as he exits from his front door. For more than the past two years, this has been his life: work and home. Sometimes, he goes out. Well, if going to the social events of the research institute he works with can be counted as going out, then by all means, he does go out.

Now that he thinks about it, the last time he really has gone out was also the same time he met the girl whom he considered to be special outside the boundaries of his alma mater. It was in a lounge bar and he was there to celebrate his friend’s anniversary with his girl (who at this time is already his friend’s wife) and Sehun swore that heavens must have been on his side when the girl who has caught his eyes, the one who seemed to not get out of his mind, was in the same place.

He wasn’t sure actually — what was in her that lured the great Oh Sehun to her. But then, every time he’s seen her, there was just something that kept him lured until one day, he realised that he was trapped in her boundaries. He found himself slowly stepping out of his own just to step in to hers. It was something that Sehun, the charming consistent model student of his time and also a phD candidate at the time would never, ever do.

Though, the male was sure that it didn’t take her very long to catch his eyes and attention. She didn’t even need to try because the moment his eyes landed at her for the very first time, he knew he was in for something that he would never get out of.

It was in a lecture theatre, in fact, it was the semester’s first morning lecture. At that time, as announced by his supervisor, Sehun was a few months away from graduating as a doctor. While he was finishing his postgraduate degree, he was taken in as a tutor for one of the first year courses his supervisor was teaching and was a coordinator of. It was a given due to his outstanding grades and moreover, he had all the credentials to do so.

She was there. No, she wasn’t sitting at the very front but neither was she sitting at the far back of the theatre. She was sitting on the fourth row, three seats in. But that morning, Sehun was given the opportunity to take over the first part of the lecture, wherein, he was start off the session by facilitating a small and quick activity that every students were to participate in. There, they all stood up and followed what Sehun told them to do so.

Whilst doing so, the gentleman’s eyes were caught the moment it landed on the very lady who was just wearing a navy blue sweatshirt and white pants. Her hair with dark brown highlights was tied in a neat, high ponytail. She looked very pleasant and her aura was something else that stood out from the rest of everyone in the group. To add to that, he was lucky to be given a chance to see her flash her friendly smile when another student approached her and probably asked if she could take the seat next to her — to which she nodded towards with an amiable smile.

After the activity he was supposed to do was done, he handed the session back to his supervisor, the original lecturer of the session, getting a one final glance of the lady. Sehun could clearly remember the last image he caught of her as he headed out of the theatre. She was sitting down, already had her little A5 notebook out, jotting down some notes on the paper.

From that moment on, she has never left his mind. It was strange but she kept popping up in the male’s mind whenever it wasn’t preoccupied by the things he had to do. He didn't understand but he couldn't deny he didn't like. He wasn’t even sure if he was going to see her again but somehow, her face, her beautiful face along with her blithe but serene aura stayed in the male’s head until the next time he unexpectedly saw her again.

And that was when she happened to be in his Thursday morning tutorial, the third and last of the three tutorials a week he was assigned to facilitate. And just like that, the inadvertent yearning and uneasiness he felt slowly dissipated and alleviated. From that morning on, Thursday morning tutorial became Sehun’s favourite tutorial session. Because it was from that tutorial where he saw more of her, getting to know her name, her voice and her nature. It was from that tutorial he was given the rare opportunity to see other sides of the girl that effortlessly lured him in, getting himself more and more trapped for something he didn’t realise was never really ready for.

It was wrong. It was unethical. Sehun knew that and he didn't need to be reminded of it. But somehow, their relationship, the affection he had for her led him to foolishly take on whatever the risk there was if he were to pursue the relationship he wanted to have with her. It was a decision he would’ve never made and took for any other person. However, given and knowing where the things were going to lead, it was clearly a disposition the girl did not agree along with. And that simply gave an end to what was only starting to get deeper.

And he knows how ed up he is when he finds himself still caught onto her. He tried forgetting her. But it is hard, which is the reason why up until this day, she remains to be vivid in him.

Getting into the lift to take him down to the basement parking, the tall and fair man leans back with his hands inside the pocket of his long black quote, paired with black pants and a turtle neck top of the same colour. He sighs as another night has reminded him of her again. It is foolish because of everything he has, he continues to remember and yearn for her. It is like no matter where or how far his career leads him to, the achievements he will be awarded with, he will still want her. Sehun can have everything but it’s as though, if it is everything without her, then he doesn't want it. It is all meaningless. He will never be satisfied.

As the box dings, Sehun steps out of it and heads to his designated parking bay. He keys his car open and hops in. Starting the engine, an idea pops into his head that diverts him from going straight to where he is supposed to originally head to.

The drive isn’t very far, taking him to get there in less than ten minutes. The place he gets to is the very place where he first saw the girl outside the four walls of the tutorial room or the lecture theatre: the Zcali lounge bar.

The male walks in, his eyes welcomed with the neon lights against the overall dark interior of the lounge. Without much thought, he heads toward the bar and orders his usual drink. With the barista quickly attending to his order, he gets his drink in no time. Savouring it, he lingers for a longer time, remembering the first informal and casual encounter he had with her, few months before he was granted with his postgraduate degree. It is all that, until he receives another call from the same friend earlier.

“What?” He answers in a grumble.

“The main event is about to start, still coming?”

Sehun checks his wrist watch. “Be there in fifteen.”

“Okay, see you then.”

Ending the call, Sehun puts his phone back in his pocket and pulls out his wallet to leave a big tip for the barista who served him promptly. He catches the latter’s eyes and does a courteous gesture by placing a hand up with a nod. Not wasting another second, Sehun leaves the area and gets to the place of where he should really be.

By the time Sehun arrived at the venue, it is already rowdy. People outside by the grounds are cheering, having drinks (mostly a bottle or a can of beer) in their hands — most of them are already intoxicated, loud, clearly having the time of their life as they shout for their bet and dance to the music that is faintly playing in the background. Hearing the prominent sound of the car engines roaring, Sehun glances over the race tracks and sees that the racing has already started, deducing it must be the main event his friend was referring to.

Watching the cars cross the marker for another lap, Sehun stays standing there until he hears his name called. The approaching male is stepping down on the steps from the elevated flat. Putting his arm around the taller male’s shoulders, he points towards the racing grounds with his other hand that is holding a bottle of beer.

“There are about ten laps left, want to go up and watch?”

Ignoring the invitation for a moment, Sehun asks, “Who are the people racing?”

“Two of them are this club’s usual racers and the other two are from dif