When Joohyun wakes up, the bed is empty. Her blood runs cold and she sits up quickly, head smacking the headboard. The sheets are rumpled and it looks like someone spent the night beside her, but Joohyun wouldn’t put it past her mind to play tricks on her. Dread fills her and she wants to smash pottery.

Was seeing Seulgi just a dream?

Joohyun doesn’t know if she could handle that. But it had seemed so real, Seulgi’s smile, the steady weight of her hand. She curses herself, curses her longing. Even if the events of the day before were real - she shouldn’t be surprised Seulgi decided to leave in the end. It was what she expected all along, really. It didn’t hurt any less.

The door swings open and a familiar blonde appears, precariously holding two mugs. Joohyun can’t breathe.

“Good, you’re up! Took you long - Joohyun?” her tone goes from teasing to worried in the blink of an eye. Seulgi deposits the coffee on the nightstand and walks to Joohyun’s side.

Joohyun knows she’s staring, but her stomach churns with anxiety and relief and something else. Seulgi awkwardly bends down so her face is level with Joohyun’s, and she brings a hand to rest on her shoulder. The weight feels real, but Joohyun is cautious, this time. She can’t believe this happiness is fleeting, and this is likely just another dream.

A small part of her whispers that Seulgi is real, flesh and blood, but Joohyun pushes the sliver of hope aside. It would be too easy to fall into the blonde’s arms, but she doubts she would survive if she was dreaming.

Seulgi is watching with confusion and concern but Joohyun closes her eyes, turns her head away. The loss of contact pains her and she wants to cry out.

She waits for Seulgi to speak, but the blonde says nothing. Eventually Joohyun raises her head and stares at her forehead instead of meeting soft cocoa eyes. She knows that would overwhelm her.

“I thought you left,” she whispers, and Seulgi has to lean closer to hear. As soon as she registers the words, her eyes go wide with surprise and she lets out a small laugh. The sound drives knives through Joohyun’s heart; she scoots back on the bed, towards the middle, holding the blanket over her chest.

Seulgi immediately realizes her mistake and sits on the bed, arm reaching for Joohyun. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just,” she shakes her head, eyes soft and gentle. Her gaze flickers over Joohyun and she feels absolutely exposed. “Of course I didn’t leave.”

Joohyun snorts, trying to ignore the way Seulgi’s words ignite in her chest. If her heart beats any faster she wouldn’t survive. But Joohyun doesn’t let a hint of her inner turmoil show when she replies. Her voice is clipped and steely and if it affects Seulgi, the blonde doesn’t show it. “Why not? You should have.”

Instead of replying, Seulgi leans forward and places a hand on Joohyun’s thigh. She feels branded, burned, and cannot look away. Seulgi waits patiently until Joohyun meets her gaze and feels under the intensity. It is an unusual feeling for her to have. Joohyun is a leader and doesn’t bend - not to anyone, except Seulgi.

“Oh, Joohyun. When will you learn,” she says, bringing her face closer. Seulgi’s breath smells like mint and coffee and her hair is all over the place. Joohyun doubts she’s in any better condition. “I’m happy right where I am.”

It is Joohyun who closes the gap between them; Joohyun who, at those words, feels a defensive wall inside her crumble. Her restraint is pulled back and her nagging sense of fear falls on deaf ears. She doesn’t kiss Seulgi (they have time for that) but wraps her arms around the blonde’s back. Seulgi tucks her face into Joohyun’s shoulder and hugs back just as fiercely. They can feel each other’s heartbeat, pounding in sync, through their thin nightshirts. It is more intimate than anything Joohyun has experienced since Jennie; Seulgi matters to her, so much. For the first time she isn’t unsure about anything.

The blonde returns the embrace with renewed energy and Joohyun finds herself falling. Her hands scrabble helplessly on Seulgi’s shoulders as her head hits the