(Whoops before we start, let me apologize for mixing Yeri up with Yuri in the previous chapter. Just reminding that Yeri is an intern in Joohyun's company. You'll see her again soon. Now on to the story!)

Joohyun wonders, far too late, why the hell she didn’t call for an ambulance. She must not have been thinking at all. They are almost home, but she is receiving all sorts of weird looks. The stares range from confused to terrified to let's-cross-the-street. She can’t even blame them. The blonde holds onto her and stumbles forward, Joohyun supporting most of her weight, and the giant dog walks regally beside them.

When they arrive at her building, Joohyun makes a beeline for her car. She had at some point grown impatient with the slow pace, and now she carries this girl on her back. The blonde isn’t heavy, but her skin is unnaturally cold where it brushes against her. Here is Joohyun Bae giving a homeless girl a piggyback ride, with a giant- dog walking beside her. Who would've thought? She would laugh if she wasn’t so scared. 

Joohyun deposits the girl in her backseat, and the dog jumps in after. She tries not to cringe as the animal - Atticus, the girl had called him - scratches the leather seat and shakes clouds of fur over everything. She has bigger things to worry about.

The drive to the hospital is a blur. Joohyun dimly remembers searching for the nearest Kaiser Permanente (a health care company) on Google Maps and driving slightly over the speed limit before pulling into a large parking lot under an “EMERGENCY” sign. The clock reads 9:46 am. She should be at work right now. Her co-workers must be worried; Joohyun isn’t one to arrive late. But she can’t call them right now - she has to concentrate on the mysterious, probably homeless, blonde girl in her backseat. 

Joohyun doesn't even bother letting her try to walk, but hoists the girl up onto her back once again immediately. She grumbles before pressing her face to Joohyun’s head. Joohyun wants to ignore how comfortable this girl is despite the predicament. She doesn’t even know her name. The dog barks at them, attempting to stuff his face into the small crack in the window Joohyun left him.

“Stay, Atticus,” she snaps. To her surprise, the dog merely grumbles in dissatisfaction and doesn’t bark again.

Joohyun rushes through the parking lot as fast as she is able to with the extra weight. The hospital doors slide open for her, and she nearly falls face first on the tile floor. She is greeted with a rush of cool air.

There is a group of people gathered near a front desk. Joohyun marches to the front of the line, quickly cutting off the woman currently speaking.

“Help her,” Joohyun practically growls. She turns and presents the girl out like a gift, and the desk attendant’s eyes widen. She abandons the line of people to call at someone behind her, voice urgent. Joohyun misses what they say, too focused on the blonde clinging to her and whining. Two men in white lab coats appear almost instantaneously and delicately lift the limp girl from her back. The girl grabs for her blindly. Joohyun feels weightless without her; she stumbles forward until her knees hit the nearest vacant seat. She is dizzy, and the room spins. Everything smells faintly of chemicals. Her head hits the wall behind her and Joohyun’s vision goes fuzzy. She closes her eyes.

“Excuse me, miss?”

Joohyun startles at the unfamiliar voice, straightening up from a slouch. Her neck aches and she rubs it, wincing, while looking up. A man in a white coat gazes down at her. Taking in the cream walled room,  she struggles to remember her surroundings: homeless girl, cold, hospital. Joohyun’s wide awake now, glancing out the window. She can’t tell how much time has passed - the sun is still bright outside. She looks at the man, trying to keep her voice neutral.

“How is she?”

He blinks once, then gestures for her to follow. Joohyun does, trailing him to the end of the hall past rows and rows of doors. She pointedly keeps her eyes away from the rooms, afraid of what she’ll see inside. He stops near the end of the hall, pointing.

“First, miss, I have some questions -”

Joohyun doesn’t wait; she pushes through the door hurriedly despite the doctor’s protests. The girl lies on a nest of pale blue blankets with an IV connected to her wrist. She looks peaceful, asleep. Joohyun feels her heart rate gradually slow to normal.

“She's going to be ok”, she whispers in relief.

“That she is,” someone answers behind her. Joohyun jumps, for she hadn’t heard anyone come in. The doctor looks sheepish. She notices he is relatively young - and handsome, if she was into that.

“Sorry to startle you. I’m Dr. Wang,” he says. “I need to ask you some questions about the patient.”

. Joohyun knows next to nothing about this girl, but she’s not about to say that to him. She knows enough about hospitals that she wouldn't be allowed in here if she told him the truth.

“Okay,” she says, trying to keep her voice calm. Maybe she can bull her way out of this one. She’s done it before, on far too many occasions.

“Great,” Dr. Wang slides a pen from his shirt pocket. “What’s her name?”

Joohyun struggles momentarily. She is prepared to say the first name that comes to mind (which is Jennie, and that would’ve been terrible) when a low voice speaks, scaring them both.

“Seulgi. Seulgi Kang.”

Joohyun balks, spinning around fully to face her. The girl cracks open one eye; it’s the same brown as the brownies she has been craving for a while. Joohyun feels her heart stutter. She knows she’s staring, mouth open, but she just can’t look away.

No, it can't be! The girl on the phone - Seulgi...

Now that she thinks about it, it makes sense that her voice sounded familiar. Seulgi said she was a painter, too - why hasn’t Joohyun made the connection until now? At least it explains why she’s drawn to the girl.

“Glad to see you awake, Miss Kang,” Dr. Wang practically beams at the girl and breaks through Joohyun’s shock. “Now,” he says, turning back to Joohyun, “please fill out your information and relation to the patient here.” He hands her a clipboard with several sheets of paper. Joohyun places it on a visitor chair and turns to the doctor, eyes steely.

“What is her prognosis?”

“I’m sorry, but we need to confirm that you are related to Miss Kang before revealing-“

Joohyun steps forward to interrupt him, tone low. She’s not one to back down before getting her way. “Now listen here-”

Seulgi speaks again, and both of them turn. She looks exhausted, but slightly pissed. Joohyun feels a small smile form on her lips at the girl’s grumpy expression, and it confuses her.

“Doctor - she’s my cousin. Only living relative. Please, talk to her.”

He looks at her, sighing, and drags a hand through his short hair. When he looks back at Joohyun, he nods.

“I’ll make an exception. Step outside, Miss…?”

“Joohyun. Bae.”

She hears the shallow gasp behind her and knows Seulgi made the connection as well. She doesn’t turn around before following the male into the hallway. She would have to discuss it with Seulgi later, anyway.

“Miss Kang was suffering from mild hypothermia when you brought her in. We were able to stabilize her quickly. She is young and otherwise healthy. We are lucky it wasn't any worse. However -“ he hesitates. “It is… unusual for someone living indoors, at this time of year in California, to get hypothermia. It is extremely rare, actually. So I must ask you; how exactly did she come to be in this condition?”

Joohyun speaks calmly, idea forming in her mind as she talks. “We were camping. It got cold, and she wasn’t in her sleeping bag. Seulgi’s always been quite stubborn.”

This was her element, standing on the edge of a lie. The doctor looks skeptical but doesn’t question further. She knows she owes him, big time.

“Thank you, Joohyun. You may join your cousin now, if you wish.” he turns away, walking quickly down the hallway. Joohyun steps inside the room again.

Seulgi is staring at her, just as she expected. Joohyun ignores the odd feeling in her stomach when she looks into those sharp brown eyes. It’s unnerving, how rattled they make her feel.

“So, we finally meet in person, stranger.”

Joohyun laughs, but it sounds hollow, even to her.

“Who would’ve thought, Seulgi?”

Seulgi smiles, before her eyes suddenly go wide with alarm and she blurts out: “Atticus-?!”

“Don’t worry. He’s in my car. Totally fine, but worried about you.”

Seulgi visibly relaxes against the pillows with a loud sigh. She closes her eyes. Her love for the dog is kind of endearing, Joohyun notes, before chastising herself for her wandering thoughts. Joohyun takes a moment to text a co-worker to clear her schedule for the day. She says it’s a “family emergency” which, given that Seulgi is her ‘cousin’, is not too far from the truth.  A reply comes moments later, telling her to take her time and that she hopes everything is well. Joohyun glances back to Seulgi, lying there with eyes closed, and wonders where the hell they go from here.

Joohyun doesn’t know what compels her to stay. She did her good deed; Seulgi is safe. She has already decided to pay for the bill, assuming that someone who makes art on the street wouldn't have enough cash to spare for the hefty amount. The cost isn’t a strain on her, and at this point she feels obligated. But aside from that, Joohyun could easily just drop Atticus off at the pound and go back to her normal life.

(She doesn’t.)

Joohyun finds herself questioning her sanity several times throughout the day. She passes the hours in Seulgi’s small room, curled onto one of the plastic visitor chairs. 

What am I thinking?

She had literally picked up two strays off the streets of San Francisco, and was now signing numerous medical forms claiming to be Seulgi’s “only living relative”. She could get in so much trouble for this, but for some reason the thought sends a thrill of excitement through Joohyun. It had been a long time since she’d done anything slightly dangerous, so she lingers at the hospital, something holding her there. She doesn't sleep much, instead napping throughout the day. Seulgi sleeps soundly however, seldom making conversation. The rise and fall of her chest is rhythmic and calming. Joohyun watches her sleeping form more often than she wants to admit.

When Joohyun leaves Seulgi’s room, she goes and sits with Atticus in her car. The dog has not stopped whining since Seulgi left, and his voice has only gotten louder. Joohyun doesn’t know much about taking care of animals, but she tries. Sometimes she walks him around, but the dog keeps trying to yank her towards the hospital doors, howling, and she has to put him back in her car.

Other times, when the air between Seulgi and Joohyun seems too intense, she goes to sit in the emergency waiting room.

She doesn’t like the waiting room - it is noisy, hard to relax in. The scent of chemicals permeates the entire vicinity. People continuously show up with wounds that bring bad memories to Joohyun’s mind. She has too much time to think, and the old guilt trickles back. Sometimes blood pools all over the tile floor from the wounds people come in with. Joohyun stares at the drops of dark red, numb, until someone mops it away. Seeing people walk through the doors bruised and crying, sometimes with others and sometimes alone, makes her think of Jennie. She tries not to, she really does. But the pain is always there, lying just beneath the surface. She can’t help it.

She sees herself, barely 19, sitting in a similar waiting room. There are no windows, no clock nothing to break up the long hallway. She doesn’t know what time it is, only that she is utterly alone. Joohyun doesn’t cry, and hates herself with a ferocity because of her lack of tears.

You’re a monster.

That was not so long ago, but she’s an entirely different person now.

It was all her fault. Jennie was dead because of her. Joohyun never deserved to be relieved of the crippling guilt. It haunted her, but the pain was warranted.

She had been busy, juggling a part time job to pay for being a full time student. She was always busy. Joohyun never took a break, never paused for a second to look Jennie in the eye and thank her for everything. She never got the chance.

Joohyun had hardly seen Jennie that whole week, let alone sat down to talk to her. She had a research paper due the next day and hardly looked up when Jen walked in, ranting.

“Are you even listening to me?”

No, she wasn’t. But God, did she wish she had been. She was narrowmindedly focused on a report. So trivial, in retrospect. She would give anything to speak to her girlfriend - ex-girlfriend just one more time. Joohyun wishes she had listened to every single word Jennie ever said.

The floodgates have opened. The memories return, battering Joohyun with a tidal wave of emotion. Raised voices, clipped tones, exaggerated hand gestures.

“This is too one-sided. I’m doing all the work to hold us together, Joohyun!”

She felt a spark of anger at being distracted from her project. Tensions ran high, and she snapped, shouting back. She wishes she hadn’t. She knew Jennie told nothing but the truth. They never spent time together anymore.

The flash of hurt on her girlfriend’s face was the last thing she saw on her living body. 

“I need some air.”

When Jennie raised her arms in defeat and walked out the door, Joohyun didn’t even turn around.

She missed the last glimpse she had of her girlfriend. How was she supposed to know that it was the end? It was all her fault.

“We’re so sorry.”

Jennie had stormed out of their shared apartment complex, located at the edge of campus. The details got blurry from there. Joohyun wasn’t sure where facts ended and her imagination began. Her memory was partly constructed from what others had said. Jennie had walked down the street in Berkeley at 11 at night because of Joohyun. It was her fault that Jen happened to pass a bank and witness a ing robbery. No witnesses could be left at the scene. The blood was on her hands.

 “Do you have anyone we can call?”

Jennie was shot from a moving vehicle. They never caught them. The bullet didn’t hit her heart but it hit close. It was not a clean shot.

 (Joohyun would know. She identified the body.)

Jennie couldn't get enough ai