I Hate My Ex

Back in Seoul, things went way more worse than he thought. He didn’t talk to Jinki since this night. They woke up bodies sticked on each other, getting ready without giving any look or any words to each other. Kibum just packed his luggage and left to Taemin’s room for the remaining days in Paris, not mentioning their night to anyone.

He was feeling atrociously down and has been skipping class for a 3 days full with his mother harping on You shouldn’t skip school. The most important things to learn are at the end the year. He also took the decision not to re-enroll as the association’s president. It was too tiring.

A few days ago Hyeongseop proposed him to eat something outside, which he accepted. He was focused on his plate, obviously avoiding his boyfriend’s gaze and having his head in the clouds. Hyeongseop wordlessly took Kibum back home, giving him a soft peck. “I love you. I hope you’ll be fine soon enough to come at school.”

At least Jinki kept his promise.

• • • • • • •

Today, he was forced to go back to school by Jonghyun, his older brother. Anyway, it was only 10 days before summer holidays. The school didn’t look as filled as usually since the final exams had started. He enjoyed his moment alone, walking along the corridor, eyeing every classroom and face popping up of their table. He was late for class but he didn’t even care. Jonghyun would have killed him.


Kibum please don’t tell me you did it.

Kibum looked down his room's carpet and scratched his head. Jonghyun looked furious as ever and he didn’t know what to tell him. Yes he ed with Jinki when we were in Paris and it was terribly good!  Hell no he won’t be saying this. He lifted up his head only to see Jonghyun, hands on his hips looking like an angry aunt. “Sorry.

Let me recap. You’re with Hyeongseop, an amazing fella. You had with Jinki, your ex-boyfriend. And now you want to break up with your actual boyfriend because you feel guilty. Well Kibum, I have a question. Are you dumb?

Kibum massaged his temples, even him was lost in his own story. “You make everything look so much worse!” he whined.

But that’s what you told me!” Jonghyun shook his head, having difficulties understanding his brother’s point of view. Kids were too troubled. “You like Jinki-hyung, isn’t it?

Kibum laughed. “Not at all…?

You don’t look so sure of yourself.” the older sat comfortably before dropping the bomb. “You shouldn’t though. He’s dating Luna. From a trustworthy source. And it’s not worth a second heartbreak.” he sighed. “I don’t want you to be hurt a second time Bum.

Kibum tried to reassure Jonghyun by showing off his best smile. “I don’t. He’s out of my life now.” He was deeply hurt by the revelation. His pride was taking a knock and he realized karma was much stronger than him.

• • • • • • •

Kibum was sitting on Taemin’s black leather couch, head laying on Hyeongseop shoulder while his boyfriend was chatting with his friend. He could see through the smoke all the popular kids gathered in this huge house, some of them greeting him with a hand gesture and an hypocritical smile. He hated them. He hadn’t planned to come but Hyeongseop dragged him there. And now he regretted following his boyfriend when he saw a bunch of final year students since it’s their last high school party. The room smelled like weed, sweat, alcohol and holidays. It was suffocating.


He stood up from the couch, catching Hyeongseop’s shoulder. “Baby I’m going upstairs for a moment. This smells bad.” he pointed toward the in between his friend’s fingers. “I feel like I’m at the edge doing an asthma attack.

Do you want me to come?” Seop started to stand up only to be shoved in the couch by the blonde.

It’s okay, stay with him. I’ll be back.


Kibum climbed the stairs by two and headed for Taemin’s bedroom. He slumped into his comfortable Batman sheets bed and stared at the ceiling, hearing the music from downstairs obviously too loud. He smiled, all alone, in that bed surrounded by bright paper stars sticked on the wall and sparkling. His life was a mess and these stars seemed to understand what he felt as his eyes were fixed on it. He hated dramas. His grades suddenly dropped, he quit his president seat and most of all, he cheated on his beloved boyfriend but didn’t had enough balls to admit it. He was becoming the main character of a super dramatic drama.


Yo Kibum.”


Kibum recognized the voice and held back his breath, staying still. He was too lazy to move a single inch of his body nor to speak. This bed was mesmerizing. He promised himself to buy one exactly like this. He felt the bed shrink against his back when the other buried himself in. They remained silent for a few moment next to each other. It wasn’t an awkward silence, it was comforting and soothing.

Did you tell him?

He hated this question. “Why should I?

Relationships are based on trust.

We trust each other.

You don’t trust him.

Kibum frowned. “What are you saying? Of course I do!

Who was he to tell him he didn’t trust his own boyfriend?

Did you guys had ?

He hated Jinki.

I knew it. That night when we went to eat together with Taemin and Minho. The hickeys. On your 6 months. You wanted to do it right? But you didn’t.

How did he knew everything? He hated the way Jinki was always right and always had the arguments to make him feel vulnerable during a fight. He stayed silent.

Jinki put his hands on his stomach and broke the silence. “What are we?

Kibum blinked at the sudden question. He tried to think for a moment, becoming a way too long moment when he heard Jinki shift. What were they?

Nothing.” he gulped. “Yeah, we’re nothing. The night in the hotel, it was just for fun. Y’know, no feelings involved.

People only have with the person they love.

Kibum knew what Jinki tried to make him understand and it seemed he was right. People only have with the person they like.

“But I don’t.” he could saw the older’s eyes on him, pleading for something more. “And, you don’t either.

Yeah.” Jinki teared off his eyes from the blonde. “Obviously.


Kibum felt a slight heartache with Jinki’s answer and reminded himself Jonghyun’s words. He was dating Hyeongseop and Jinki was dating Luna. Both cheated on their partners and nothing of what happened should have happened. They were quits and the only thing they had in common was this heavy secret they had to keep buried.

I hope we never see each other again after.” Kibum turned his gaze toward Jinki’s and could see how hurt he was hearing his harsh words. He was starting to regret it.

Kibum could feel Jinki’s stare on his soul, as if these were the last seconds he would see him. “I hope too.”

Jinki got up from the bed and left the room, not even giving him a single look, leaving Kibum and his heart full of regrets and guilt.


Jinki approached an excited Taemin and was at the edge of shouting in his ears because of the thumping music. “I’m leaving.

The younger turned over to face Jinki. “Why hyung? It’s not that late!

I don’t know, I’m feeling tired.” he rubbed his temples.

What about Luna? You’re not leaving her all alone  here, right?

Oh, yeah. Well, no. Of course.” he almost forgot her.

Taemin patted his back and handed him a glass. Jinki met Luna in the corner of the living room and felt a soft peck on his lips. The sweet taste of her lips disappeared when he caught sight of Kibum sensually getting close to Hyeongseop, slowly sliding his hand on his boyfriend’s waist and making Jinki hold tight Luna’s. He watched from the corner how both danced so closely, with love and passion bursting out of their bodies, eyes locking on each other. It broke him internally.


Kibum sank his face in his boyfriend’s neck and hummed his perfume. Sugary and fruity. It made him forget Jinki’s one, strong, woody and powerful. Kibum embraced his boyfriend tightly as if he was going to fall in a hole at every minute. He closed his eyes and tried to forget everything around him, but he couldn’t. Jinki’s face haunted his mind. He could see him even if his eyes were shut. He thought about it, how it was the last time they were going to see each other. He had dreamed about it months and months. But now he just felt sad.

Baby, are you tired? Should we go?

Kibum opened his eyes and saw Jinki’s eyes on him, hand going down Luna’s bottom.


He was provoking him, Kibum kept saying to himself while Hyeongseop dragged him to his car. He sat next to his boyfriend in the passenger seat and looked outside the window, hearing his name being called, but he saw nothing. His mind was just tricking him and a too much from him was hoping to see

Where should we go?

Your house.


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hey im sorry i think i’ll giveup on this story...i dont feel capable of keep writing it anymore. I started writing 2 onkey chaptered fics but one is very controversial in my point of view but i find a good inspiration writing it so im eager to see your reaction 2 this coming fic. see you soon guys!
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