He didn’t know how he came to this point, maybe it was the comments on ‘We Go Up’s music video or the comments on their Instagram posts. Donghyuck stood in front of the mirror looking at himself, well, checking his body out. He looked at his stomach, his tights and arms. He used to never really worry about his size before, sneaking in snacks when on a diet and always up for ice cream. Now, whilst eying himself, he could see some fat on his tummy and his slightly sloppy arms. Thighs thicker that most of the other members. He shook his head, turned away from the mirror and said to himself, “I don’t care, I’m not fat”.  

Later that week, he came to conclusion that he did care. Yesterday, NCT DREAM  finished their last promotions for ‘We Go Up’. To celebrate, SM organized a dinner for the Dreamies and their staff. Donghyuck had just taken his first bite when Jisung, the youngest, joked about how round Donghyuck’s cheeks had become during these past few weeks of promotion. Everyone laughed, but Donghyuck just looked Jisung in the eyes, a bit shocked. The laughing quieted down, and everyone continued eating and having small chats, though Donghyuck couldn’t quite enjoy the meal like everyone else seemed to do and didn’t really feel like talking as well.

They were halfway through the course when Donghyuck excused himself to the bathroom. He looked into the mirror above the sink. He checked out his cheeks and tucked onto them with his hand. They turned red and then back to his neutral skin color. Had he really been gaining wait since their comeback? He had dieted a lot before ‘We Go Up’ with the other members. During promotions he forgot about their strict eating rules and stuffed himself full of cookies if they had the time to eat something, though he also had days that lunch would get forgotten because of their busy schedule.

He stared just a bit more before returning to their table, he sat back down again between Jeno and Mark. “You alright?” Mark asked, and Donghyuck just nodded. He didn’t want to tell anyone that Jisung’s remark made him a bit uncomfortable. The food didn’t look as delicious as before, and he wasn’t as hungry anymore. But not to waste the food, he put just a few more noodles in his mouth.

Dinner was finished and the Dreamies had to return to their dorms. They were all settled in the car. Donghyuck was getting squished against the window by mark, who was regularly getting pushed by a playful Jaemin. He really wasn’t in the mood and carefully placed his earphones, sending Jaemin a death glare, so he would get a bit more space; he was getting nauseous from all the squishing. The music flows into his ears, he was listening to some ballads from a random playlist on Spotify, it eased him, and he soon fell asleep.

Once he opened his eyes, he was shaken awake by Mark. All the other members were already gone, because Mark and Donghyuck stayed at the NCT 127 dorm, and not the Dream one. “We are here.” Mark explained. Donghyuck stretched a bit before exiting the car, his muscles all stiff from sleeping. He wasn’t actually awake yet, when he stumbled out of the car almost falling. Luckily Mark was there to catch him. “Easy there.” He laughed. “Yea, yea.” Haechan said, laughing a bit as well.

When they got back to the dorm, it was about 8pm-ish. Most of the hyungs were stationed in their rooms, but Taeyong and Jaehyun were still in the kitchen, washing the last few plates and bowls; they were the ones that lost paper-rock-scissor. “Hi, how was dinner? What kind of delicious things did you all eat?”