Running away from the place where he belongs, it is really hard for Doyoung to let go. He doesn't even know why he even broke up with him, Jaehyun is what everyone says, the perfect human being that you could have and you're very lucky to have him as your own. Jaehyun didn't do anything wrong here. He never cheats, abuse him or do any actions that could totally destroy their relationship, instead he does the opposite. Jaehyun is the person that everyone wants to get married with.

He hesitated a lot of times, thought about great memories with him and how happy he was whenever he's with him. He tries to find the negative side of him but he found nothing. It's not that he's tired, maybe Doyoung feels he isn't enough. Maybe Jaehyun doesn't deserve him.

He looks at the mirror, ugly sobs coming from his mouth, tears flowing from his cheeks, eyes gotten swollen and same clothes still worn after yesterday. He looks like a mess, compared to what he looks like when Jaehyun is with him. It seems like his world got torn apart into pieces. This is what he had done anyways. He needs to deal with it or it up.

"Ugly for him? Too noisy to be his boyfriend?" Doyoung mocks himself as wipes his own tears away. "..are you happy now?" He spats, getting angry at his reflection and its ugliness. "Stop it Doyoung... just stop."

He looks straight to his face and smiled widely. He crouched down, picked up the clothes that he bought the other day and tried it on his body. "You looked really great when you're dressed." He praised himself and went inside the bathroom to take a bath.

Fresh from the tub, he picks his comb and starts combing his hair. He looks straight to his pale slim body and his lotion. He applied some to his skin and dressed up, feeling confident to his newly bought clothes. He looks good until he saw his long hair. He picked up his scissors and cuts it by himself then went inside the bathroom to find a dye and applied it on his hair.

He looks again at the mirror, a brownish dyed hair version of himself appeared. He smiled widely again, feeling satisfied at his own masterpiece. He didn't hesitate to take a good photo and post it online.. only to let the others to see that he's doing great, moving on and contented with his new life without him.

A ding from his phone got his attention. He saw a notification coming from Jaehyun, telling him that he looks great. His heart wanted to burst from the sudden mixed emotions. One side of him feels so happy that his ex noticed him, another side of him tells him that Jaehyun might probably wanting to see more of him. Another side feels so angry that Jaehyun doesn't do anything to fix their relationship but the most side of him tells him that he's still waiting for Jaehyun to come to him and hug him, kiss him and be with him again. Doyoung's tears starts to flow again. He took the keys of his car along with his phone and wallet, ready to attack Jaehyun. Not until he remembered what's the purpose of breaking up with him. He looked at the mirror again, tears staining his make up.

"You idiot. You broke up with him just to focus on yourself but why are you going to him?" He scolded himself and threw the keys back to the sofa. He plopped to his bed and checked his social media account to see more comments. He got a few from him and he couldn't stop crying again. He threw his phone away, angry to himself that he keeps on thinking about going back to him.

"Stop your delusions, Doyoung. Stop it. You don't deserve him." He chanted to himself before he drift himself to sleep.

"Doyoung, please open up.." A familiar voice woke him up from his dream. He looked at the intruder and saw Jaehyun holding a bouquet of red roses in his arm from the window. "Please? Lets talk.. lets fix this." He pleads as he keeps on knocking his door. He opened it to shut him up but Jaehyun is too persistent, he doesn't want to give up until they're back together again. "I love you so much, Doyoung.. I can't live without you.." Jaehyun cried. Doyoung shook his head and pushed him away. 

"No, Jaehyun... I need to live without you... and you need to learn how to live without me too.." He said and closed the door. He slumped on the floor, crying from pain. He loves Jaehyun so much but again, he's too perfect for him.

Jaehyun, on the other side of the door, feels so defeated. He leaves the bouquet on the door step and looks back at the door, hoping that Doyoung will change his mind. Giving up, Jaehyun drives the car with tears flowing down from his eyes. 

"Hello? Who is this?" A sudden call from an unknown number came to his phone. He just finished doing the laundry and just spending his time folding it when his phone rang. "This is Nurse Jane from Seoul Medical Center, are you Mr. Kim Doyoung? I found your number as an emergency contact person from Mr. Jung Jaehyun." The person from the other line said. At the mention of the hospital's name, Doyoung felt his world crashed. He felt scared that something bad happened to Jaehyun. 

 "What happened?" He asked while his hands are shaking.

"He got into car accident a few minutes ago and he's currently in critical conditi-"

"I'll be there..." He said before he lets the nurse finish her sentence. He ended the call and a sudden flash of memories came back to Doyoung. Jaehyun's face whenever he wakes him up in the morning and his dimples showing that makes his day much better. Jaehyun's assuring words whenever Doyoung keeps on doubting himself. Jaehyun's "I love you's and I miss you's" whenever Doyoung feels so upset and they are away from each other. Jaehyun's cooking whenever Doyoung feels so down from all the people who keeps on questioning his abilities. In all of the things that is happening to him, Jaehyun is always there for him. He never gives up on him. Jaehyun is him. He is Jaehyun. Without him, he wouldn't be the Doyoung he is now. 

He grab his keys and ran as fast as he could to his car. He's known as a safe driver by his friends since he's too slow to drive his own car but this time, he doesn't care anymore and the fear of losing Jaehyun is his biggest one. He's stupid enough to believe other people's opinions of him other than Jaehyun's. He shouldn't have break it off with him. 

Once he arrives at the hospital, he asked for his love's name and ran straight to his room. When he finally reached the door, he opened it and saw Jaehyun lying down with his head full of bandages and cast on his arm. Doyoung didn't hesitate to hug him even from his state. He doesn't want to let him go anymore. 

"I'm sorry, Jaehyun.. I love you so much. Please don't leave me.." Words came by repeatedly from his mouth. He cried his heart out, feeling so defeated. 

Doyoung spent his entire week in the hospital with the help of his friends. Jaehyun's family is on their way back from states and they thank him for taking care of their son while they are away. Doyoung felt so guilty that he caused all of these but his family forgives him as long as he stay with him. It's also been a week since Jaehyun is still unconscious from the accident. Doyoung wished that he'll wake up soon to tell and clarify everything. 

He's fixing his blanket when Jaehyun's fingers moves. Doyoung, who's very much excited that he's finally gaining his consciousness, keeps on calling his name.

"Jaehyun? Can you hear me? Jae?" The said name opened his eyes. Adjusting from the blurry sight and the light, he looked at the man in front of him.

"...who are you?" Doyoung's world crashed again. 

Helping Jaehyun in walking outside the garden, Doyoung smiled as Jaehyun answered his question correctly.

"...our anniversary is June 17." 

"Correct.. and who am I again?" Doyoung asked.

"You're Doyoung, my bunny.." Jaehyun smiled as he saw the older laugh. Doyoung looked at him and a tear drop came out from his eye without any warning. 

"I'm sorry.... I'm just.." Jaehyun wiped it off from his cheek and came worried. "You know, I may not remember anything but my heart does remind me of you.." He said and tried to hug the older. 

"I'm sorry, Jaehyun." Doyoung mouthed and Jaehyun shush him up. 

"I don't know what happened before this but I'm pretty sure that my heart is happy that you're here with me.." 

"I love you, Jaehyun.. so much.." 

"I.... love you too... Doie.." Doyoung looked at him when Jaehyun mentioned his nickname that he didn't even taught to him.

There's a chance... he'll remember me again soon and this time, I won't let him go.. never again.