FOUR
She's Merely A Lost Girl
==(FOUR)
Dongwoon is lounging in the couch in the lovely Sunday evening when Hyojoo comes walking into the living room with a letter in her hand.
“Dongwoon,” she calls for him. “Do you remember when you asked me about putting you in different school?”
That very one question makes him sits bolt upright in the couch as his gaze swings onto his sister. “I do,” he drawls.
“Well, the letter comes in today. And it somehow, states here that you got accepted.”
“What?!”
“You got accepted!!”
Dongwoon springs off the couch and grabs the letter from his sister. He reads through. His sister is not kidding. He did get accepted into the Startrek Prep School.
WHAT IS THIS SCHOOL?
“What?” He asks again, looking up to meet his sister’s gaze. “What is this school?”
“Certainly not Starstruck High School,” his sister grins. “Do you not like it?”
“I do…”He then frowns again when he reads trough the letter again. “What is this school? I mean, it’s obviously a prep school but, what is this school, Hyojoo?”
Hyojoo sighs as she says, “It’s a boarding school.”
“A boarding school?”
“Yes,” she murmurs.
“But…why boarding school? Out of other school in this state, why boarding school?”
“Look, either this school or you stay to where you go to school now, okay. I’m sorry. If I had known earlier what school this is, I wouldn’t have registered your name, but-”
“But?”
“But, I only found out after I have registered your name. Look, it’s a good school okay. Probably the best. I don’t know,” Hyojoo shrugs as she sits down. “It has this every cool major that most teens like, and they told me that every students who graduate from this school has a higher chance to go to the best college, or whatever college of your pick. I’ve seen this school. And it’s so awesome and it has everything that you need.”
Dongwoon takes the empty spot next to his sister. “But I don’t need all this fancy facilities. I just need to get the hell outta that Starstruck school and get into another regular high school. I don’t want to leave you here all alone.”
“Oh Dongwoon.” Hyojoo rests her head on his shoulder. “I’ll be fine. I just want you to have everything that’s best for you. I don’t want to hold you back.
“But you’re not, okay. You’re not holding me back.”
“You like playing guitar right? You like to indulge yourself in music and I know this prep school will be your big shot to achieve you dream. You should go to this school, Dongwoon. I want you to.”
Dongwoon lowers his head, thinking everything through. Everything as in Jia. Then he looks up and shrugs. “Fine, I’ll do it.”
“Yeay!” Hyojoo leans in and hugs his little brother. “Oh and I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” he smiles.
==
Her sister is in bed but Dongwoon is still in the living room. He leafs through the application form and other piles of paper that are compiled together with the acceptance letter. He looks through the last sheet of paper in pink and finds that he has to go to interviews and there are like 3 interviews to begin with, He’ll be super busy this week okay. Then he has 2 meetings to go to, together with other candidates like himself and listen to the talks given by the lecturers of the prep school. In couple of week, he’ll be off in the prep school, achieving his dreams, like his sister said. Now what’s he going to do about Jia? He knows he has to let Jia knows about this good news. He leans back and throws the letters on the floor. Things would be easier if he’s not attached to anyone from the Starstruck High School.
==
Monday morning. Ugh. He hates Monday mornings, he really does. It’s 3.00 a.m.. in the morning and he mumbles to himself, why on earth have I waken up? It’s still frigging early and even Hyojoo would still be in bed.
Dammit. He can’t sleep.
Dongwoon goes downstairs and heads to the kitchen. He takes out orange juice from the fridge and also some apple pie. Thank you Lord!
He hugs them close to his chest and walks to the living room. As he’s about to sit down, a sudden ringing phone startles him and he almost drops the food. better be important!
“Hello?” His voice husky and lazy.
“It’s me!” Jia’s voice, on the other hand, sounds genuine and cheerful.
“What do you want?”
“You wanna hang out? I can’t sleep~~”
“Don’t waste my time, woman.”
“But I really can’t sleep. C’mon, let’s hit the park. It’d look beautiful tonight. Tonight’s a full moon night, you know.”
“Jia,” Dongwoon says as he pinches the middle of his eyes hard. “It’s ing 3.00 a.m.. and you want us to crash the park because it’s a full moon tonight?”
“Yes.”
Dongwoon sighs. “I’m sorry, Jia, but I don’t think I could join you tonight.”
“Why?” She asks in a lower tone. “Look, if you can’t come go, it’s okay cuz I’ll fetch you, like always. C’mon.”
“It’s not about I can or can’t go. I simply could not join you.”
“But…” I want to hang out with you. I wanna talk to you. I wanna see you. “Okay,” she retreats. “Good night.”
And before he manages to offer her goodbye as well, the line goes dead, fast.
==
“Here.” Hyojoo lays down a perfectly pressed grey T-shirt and a pair of black slacks. “You have an interview this evening right? I bought this for you. I want you to wear this and look super handsome to nail the interview.”
“What’s this interview for anyway?”
“To decide which class you should be in.”
“OK. But still the interview won’t start until 3.00 p.m.. or something. Don’t you think it’s a little early for all this preparation? And they really take this thing seriously. I mean, an interview to decide which class you should be in? Wow.”
Hyojoo, standing across the room from where Dongwoon is, starts to cross her arms. “Of course they take everything seriously. And since I won’t be home until 6.00 p.m I thought I should let you know what to wear. ”
“Yeah…” Dongwoon grabs his backpack from the study table and walks towards her sister, all ready to go to school. “Okay, goodbye now. Thanks a lot by the way,” he says and he leans in and kisses Hyojoo on her right cheek.
“I love you. Be home early.”
“Will do,” he shouts as he goes downstairs.
As soon as Dongwoon reaches school, he heads straight for the principal office, letting him know about quitting the school in a 2-week time and taking all the credits from his works here and giving the principal some sort of recommendation letter just to complete the resume for the Startrek Prep School. The principal doesn’t say much but how he’s sorry to let Dongwoon go and praises him that picking that school is the right choice. And he excuses himself afer the short meeting.
He’s been spending all his time at school going from classes to classes, focusing his head in the study cuz he finds out that learning at Startrek is a different matter and he needs all the knowledge he can get. It’ a top school, so he wants to make sure he deserves it. When the school’s over, only then he realizes that he hasn’t once encountered with Jia.
He has other stuff to take care of instead of concerning on Jia. He has this interview he has to go. He gets upstairs to his room to find the outfit earlier that Hyojoo has prepared is lying gingerly on the bed, untouched. It’s 2.12 p.m. He knows he must hurry up. He heads straight for shower and later, he’s all ready to leave for the interview at 2. 45 p.m.
==
One week has passed on and as much as he hates himself for doing it, Dongwoon still couldn’t find the courage he needs to tell Jia about his future plan and that is to leave school. Leaving school is one thing, but to leave for a boarding school, Gosh he wonders what will Jia react to that. His intention is far from hurting Jia but he knows how much his big decision could affect her. He’s not sure exactly how, but he knows this decision of his is not a good news to her.
That night, Dongwoon calls Jia and asks her if he could meet up with her and just- hang out. Like old times. He misses talking to her. She’s fun to be with, despite her cold appearance. To his avail, Jia doesn’t pick up his calls. So he texts, but she doesn’t reply to any of them. Has he done something to hurt her? They rarely meet up at school, and when they do, he smiles at her without her smiling back. But he doesn’t mind that. He sees that as a normal respond from Jia.
But this, Gosh, it bothers him a lot. And as night gets deeper, he still sits by the phone, waiting and hoping she would call back. Or text him back, at least. When he dozes off, the phone goes off and he’s startled by the sudden loudness of his ringing tone. He glances at he bright phone screen and reads Jia’s name on it. He can’t help but beam.
“Hello,” he quickly says, unaware of his loud voice.
“Hey,” she says back, sounding unequally cheerful.
“Did you get my texts? Or my missed calls?”
“I did.”
“I’m sorry I bothered you but I was thinking if you wanted to hang out.”
Silence. Dongwoon could hear her breathing, so she’s still on but her not saying anything almost gives him a heart attack.
“Hello,” he says into the strained silence.
“I’m still here, sorry.” She clears . “You have anywhere in mind to go?”
Dongwoon literally smiles from ear to ear hearing her question. “No, I don’t but I don’t really mind whatever place we crash tonight.” As long as I’m with you.
“Okay,” she says calmly. “I’ll pick you up?”
“Wonderful.”
==
That night, their next hang-out place is at the local bar which allows high school student to come in, on one condition, if they have inside connection, And Jia does, thanks to her bully mates. Dongwoon doesn’t hitting the bar It’s his first time though, but he’s glad he goes there with Jia. She’d know what to do in this kind of place. What’s awesome about that place is that everyone seems to be busy indulging their own thoughts as Dongwoon and Jia don’t receive any glares or stares when they take their spots at the bar counter.
“You’ve been here before?”
“Yes,” she answers simply. “Is this your first time?”
Embarassed, he nods his head with a short smile. Jia raises her brows and just nods to his confession.
“It’s not a big deal, you know. Not coming here before is like a small matter. What matters is how much fun you had on your first day.”
“You sound like a bar-guru.”
She laughs at his ridiculous compliments but thanks him anyway. Then she turns to the bartender and order a plain beer.
“Are you kidding me?” Dongwoon grabs her left arm that’s resting ont eh counter. “You’re driving tonight. You can’t drink.”
“Are you kidding me, young man?” Suddenly, a deep voice of the bartender interrupts. “Let the lady drink. You, on the other can order an orange juice and drive her home.”
The idea doesn’t look so bad but still, what would Jia’s parents say about him bringing her home all drunk? Then again, Jia’s parents are like so ed up with their own worlds that they don’t seem to care her going to this kind of place at 18.
“Fine,” he shrugs and let his grip off her. She smiles at him.
“That’s how things work around here. But usually I’d ask you to drink along with me, but Imma let you be the gentleman tonight.”
Dongwoon doesn’t appeal her attitude tonight. Something’s bothering her and he doesn’t feel good about it. Maybe they should crash somewhere else.
The beer and the juice are served and they both take it at first glance. Surprisingly, when Dongwoon’s juice is just half away from finish, Jia has already asks for her second beer. When the second beer arrives, she gulps them down like a couple of sleeping pills and the sight disgusts Dongwoon. He has got to leave and drag Jia along with him. He gets up on his feet and grabs Jia by her arm. Being all drunk, Jia playfully pushes Dongwoon away and laughs when he almost tremble upon his chair.
“You look funny…” Her voice sounds lazy and dragging. She then stares at the empty glass. “Even this glass looks funny…Doesn’t it looks funny to…”
“That’s it. I’ve had enough.” He grabs her arm and helps her to stand up. He even pays for the drinks. “Keep the change.” Then his attention turns to Jia. “Get up now.”
“No..no..I don’t want to go home. Home’s no fun…”
“We need to leave. It’s already late. C’mon Jia.” Dongwoon suppresses his anger and coaxes her with much patience.
“No…!”
“Let’s go!”
“I said no!” Jia exclaims, drawing all the unwanted attention. Dongwoon looks around and let his gaze slides from the whispering crowd and onto Jia. She shrugs her arm off him and stares at him with hatred.
“Stay the hell away from me or I’m gonna yell out loud and let everybody in the bar knows how big of a jerk you are!” Little does she realize how loud her voice already is.
“Hey man,” the bartender interrupts him once again. “Lay off her. She doesn’t want to be bothered.”
“You shut the up!” He points at the bartender and then he turns to Jia and grabs her hand. Whether she likes it or not, she’s leaving the bar.
Dongwoon shoves her into the car and he hastily shuts the door. He feels angry tonight. He only wanted to have a nice hang out with her and all is ruined by her getting drunk.
He’s wise enough not to take her home. Funny though as the fact that he doesn’t really know where she lives. Instead, he drives them to the lake that has big mountain behind it and is surrounded by green pine trees. This would’ve looks breathtaking when winter comes, but that night is the only time he has now and he’s with a drunk girl whose home is unknown to him. His life is officially pathetic.
He gets out of the car and opens the door for her. But when he opens it, Jia doesn’t want to come out. She just stares blankly at the dashboard, hugging her knees. She’s been in that position since their first drive up to this lake and hasn’t moved a bit since. He doesn’t know what to. Se he decides he’s gonna let Jia that way. He turns on the heater as the night gets all breezy with cold air. He shuts the door for her but he himself wanders down the lake and stays by the lake, sitting on a cold wooden bench. He’ll wait for her to sober up, so she could think clearly and tell him where she lives. And when he drops her, he decides he should take a bus home, or trouble her sister with enormous worry and ask her to pick him up. Maybe he’ll do the latter since he knows the bus won’t be available at 2.30 a.m.. Which sane driver would be working extra hour anyway?
“It’s beautiful.” Jia’s voice comes up to him like a whisper and that almost throws life out of him. He’s relieves to find Jia looking more like herself now.
“It is,” he agrees.
“It’d look even beautiful when the winter comes and when we’re here in the daylight, or if we’re here during the summer to watch the sunrise.”
“Yeah,” he agrees, again. Then he looks at her. She looks so pale that she seems to shine in the darkness. It’s a night with a sorrow half moon. “How are you feeling?”
“ty,” she blurts out, looking at him and forces a beautiful smile.
“Sobered up?”
“Perhaps. I’m sorry I behaved like a total bi-”
“It’s okay,” he cuts across her, but not to annoy her, to make her feel less bad.
“I’m still sorry.”
“It’s okay.” He assures her by gripping tight her arm and smiles at her.
“How did you know about this place?”
“I just drove around…then I saw a sign…and here we are.”
“Oh…” She then fixes her solemn gaze over to the gleaming lake and the sparkles enlighten her heavy heart a bit. Having Dongwoon by her side is what enlightens her heavy heart the most.
“It’d be a lot of fun to camp here during summer.” Then again he realizes, if he’s ever going to be here during summer vacation. He did read something about a summer program organized by the prep school in order to keep the students focused about study instead of wasting time down at the beach.
“I had dinner with my mom’s business partner, again,” Jia starts, making Dongwoon to turn to her. But her face has this expression of sick and disgust that he wonders where this conversation is leading.
“And,” he gently asks.
“And he ran up his hand up to my thigh. And I’d feel his dirty nails sink deeper into my skin that I felt breathless. And he would put an innocent expression and would pretend to ask my mom questions, just to distract her from realizing my torment. Then he would rub my thigh down to me and he would point his finger into my private area and he’d still put on that ing innocent face that I felt like I’d be better off dead rather than having him-” Tears twinkled in her eyes under the moon light and slowly it trails down her red cheeks when Dongwoon asks her to stop but when he takes her in his arms, Jia tries to free herself.
“No you don’t understand!” She yells as she stares right into his equally tearful eyes. “I wanted this thing to stop as well. I wanted my world to stop being so dreadful and I wanted to stop going over to dinner with my mom! I wanted to stop going through all these ty situations over and over again. If I could stop forcing myself to feel scared by all this! If only I could stop breathing, I know everything would be perfect!”
“Don’t say that, please…” He pleads, trying hard to hold his sobs.
“What do you want me to do? Pretend like none of this ever happened? Pretend like I don’t give to what’s happening to me? Pretend like I’m strong and I can endure this, if I could just hold on? No, I can’t okay! I can’t.”
Dongwoon knows he must not break down I front her after hearing all this bad stuffs that happen to her. He has to remain composed, though his eyes are suggesting the opposite. When Jia finally breaks down and cries her eyes out, he takes her in his arms again and holds her tight. Even if she struggles to free herself, he won’t allow her to. Whether she likes or not, she’s going to cry in his arms. He wants her to know that there’s someone out there for her. And it’s him.
He her hair with care and rubs her back gently, in a way that Dongwoon refuses to allow her to recall the touch of the erted old man that’s been harassing her since God knows when. He does it very light and gentle so that Jia knows that she’s fine. At least for now. It pains Dongwoon tremendously knowing he couldn’t help Jia. He’s so helpless that he hates himself after that. He should try to be more open to Jia so she could do the same. So he’d know what else has been eating her alive.
It takes about 10 minutes to pull back slowly and she settle with her soft sobs. Dongwoon cups her face to stare at her beautiful face and he smiles at her.
“You’re doing a pretty good job at crying. I think you should cry more.”
Jia laughs shortly at his silly remark again and pushes his hands off her face.
“I’m sorry it happens this way,” she apologizes again.
“No.” He sounds stern. “It’s not your fault. I swear to God if I ever meet that jerk Imma beat some good sense into him.”
“I’d do that instead of you,” she jeers. “You’re good with words.”
“Then why didn’t you beat the crap outta him?”
“I think of my mom.”
“I’m not trying to be rude, but why?”
“Her only world is her company. And she loses the deal, she’s doomed.”
“Why would your mom have a same business partner?
“I don’t know. I tried to figure it out, but in the end of the day, maybe she has no other choice.”
“Then stop going to the dinner. I’ll abduct you from now on if your mom happen to have dinner again with that psychopath.”
“You know what’s funny about this?”
Dongwoon raises his brow. “Nothing is funny about this, Jia.”
“That same psychopath who harasses me, is the same guy that my mom cheats with. She does that to annoy my dad at first, letting him have the taste of his medicine. But eventually, she becomes entangled with all this mess.”
“I know it sounds silly, but still, please hold on. I want you to be strong. And do it not because I ask you to, but because youmust.”
“I’ll try my best.”
“And please let me know if you have any information regarding that sonofa. I really want him to pay for this.”
“Wow you’re so protective.”
“I want to be able to help. I want to be that friend who you can count on.”
“I know,” she smiles at him. “You are that kind of friend.”
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