Final
Always LoveHere comes the bit of angst... but no worries, it's a happy ending. hehe... Hope you guys still enjoy it and thank you always for reading!
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“Here, try this.”
Jennie responds to her girlfriend by opening , while all her attention is still focused on her show. This is one of the advantages or disadvantages (if you’re trying to stay in shape) with dating a cook/ chef; you get to be the willing guinea pig to whatever new recipe they concocted. They have been dating for over five months, but Jennie isn’t going to complain.
Most of her girlfriend’s dishes are unbelievable, and only some were she could consider just alright. After five months, Chaeyoung could already tell the difference in her expression. Before Jennie could say anything, Chaeyoung would either be going to the kitchen to get her some more or going to the kitchen to fix it.
Right now, Jennie is in the fourth episode of the show she’s binge-watching. Plots are starting to unravel, motives are beginning to get more evident, and the villains are starting to show their true colors. But as soon as the silky, creamy taste of perfection melted on her tongue, Jennie had completely forgotten what she was watching.
“Mmmmmmmmm…”
Chaeyoung is doing it again. She’s doing that cute expression where her cheeks are just bubbled up, and her eyes are just beaming with pride. Five months but until now Jennie still can’t get enough of it.
“Is it good?”
“Yes. Holy …” Jennie praises the ice cream again, while Chaeyoung happily feeds her another spoonful. “What brand is this?”
“I… I made it.”
Jennie’s face just glowed in surprise, “You did?”
Chaeyoung’s cheeks were tinted a cute pink, “Yes. Jisoo unnie told me you love milk ice cream, so I tried making it.”
“And it’s awesome, here,” It was Jennie’s turn to feed Chaeyoung, before wiping the ice cream that drip on the side of Chaeyoung’s lips. “It’s amazing, huh?”
Chaeyoung still has that adorable expression. A look that always gets Jennie breaking into that rare gummy smile.
“You’re perfect,” Jennie professes softly, yet loud enough for Chaeyoung to smack her in the shoulders. “What? You’re so beautiful, the sweetest girl in the world, a freak in bed or anywhere for that matter-”
Jennie says smugly before her gaze tilted over the kitchen counter where it wasn’t just food that got ravaged.
“Stop-“ Chaeyoung let out a squeal from the memory. She gave her girlfriend another smack, but Jennie already anticipated the attack and caught Chaeyoung’s hand, lacing their fingers together.
“And you made this… this… this heaven. Seriously? What more could I ask for?”
Chaeyoung sits there quietly, her gaze on the milk ice cream that is melting with her every stir. She wants to answer Jennie that there is more that she could ask for. Jennie deserves a girlfriend who can spoil her with dinners at the fanciest restaurants overlooking the skyline of Seoul. She could ask for a girlfriend who is just going to say, anything you want love, I got it. She should be with someone who could take her to any place in the world. Jennie deserves a girlfriend that is better than her.
But someday, she swore someday; she’ll be that girl.
“Hey?”
“Huh?”
“What’s wrong? you’re being quiet.”
Chaeyoung shakes away the insecurities that plagues her, and instead, forced a smile.
“Nothing, nothing.”
Jennie flashes that gummy smile only close friends and Chaeyoung are privileged to see, and in an instant, Chaeyoung forgot why she was even worried.
*
“You are trying to make me fat.”
Jennie groaned dramatically, tongue clicking in the inside of her cheek as she watches in vain at the meal her girlfriend brought her for lunch. This has been their little routine for quite some time now, Chaeyoung usually comes over for lunch, a quick 20-30 minute one before heading back to the food truck.
“Why?” Chaeyoung raised a curious brow at her girlfriend while putting a container of mac and cheese on the table. “Who are you trying to look good for?”
“Well, my girlfriend is really hot, and all these hoes just want a piece of her.”
Chaeyoung was about to break into a smile, but didn’t want to give Jennie that satisfaction and hid her expression. “Okay, fine… tomorrow I’ll bring you a salad instead.”
Jennie raised her brow in protest, “Excuse me?”
“And some fruits for dessert. I know this amazing salad with spinach and arugula.”
Jennie’s eyes grew wide before shaking her head in disgust.
“Don’t you dare.”
“I’ll make my own special dressing for my baby. Really healthy stuff, Balsamic vinegar and lemon juice-“
“Don’t. You. Dare.” Jennie growls playfully before cupping her girlfriend’s cheeks. Chaeyoung smiles back before Jennie gives her an obnoxiously loud kiss on the lips.
The kiss managed to earn the smirks of Jennie’s coworkers passing by their table. Chaeyoung playfully shoves Jennie in her shoulder, her face still bright red in embarrassment. She didn’t get a chance to recover when Jennie locks her in a headlock making her chuckle as Jennie threatens her one more time.
“Say you’re going to bring me salad one more time and I’ll make out with you right here, right now,” Jennie growls in her ear.
“You wouldn’t do it…” Chaeyoung says in a haughty tone, daring her girlfriend.
“Oh, I wouldn’t? I wouldn’t?” Jennie wasn’t backing down at all, inching closer and closer, until they cover every inch space between them.
“Okay, okay…” Chaeyoung’s voice raised a pitch higher in surrender. “No more salad.”
“What did you say? More salad?” Jennie growls again as she playfully kisses Chaeyoung in her cheek.
“Stop… stop…I said no salad…”
In that workplace cafeteria while everyone hurries and scurries around them, here, they are, perfect in their own little world as time stood still.
*
“Here,” Jennie swiftly places her credit card on the tray before Chaeyoung could open to respond. She notices Chaeyoung’s expression faltered just as quickly. Those brown eyes focused more on her molten lava cake than on Jennie.
“Thank you,” Chaeyoung says, her voice not louder than a whisper.
“For what?”
“For paying. Again.”
“Oh, c’mon Chaeng, you don’t know the rules of dating?”
“Rules of dating?”
Jennie leans closer at the girl pressed to her side, as if ready to whisper to Chaeyoung a long kept secret. “Whoever asks you on a date gets to pay.”
“Well,” Chaeyoung presses her lips on Jennie’s ear. “technically, you never really ask me out on a date, we just go out to eat after work.”
“Oh?”
Chaeyoung gentle shoves her girlfriend on the side, “So, maybe I should ask you out on a date right now. So, Jennie Kim, if you’re not doing anything tomorrow night, I would love to take you out to dinner.”
Jennie pouts thoughtfully, tapping her chin with her finger. “Well, if you’re keeping count, tomorrow will be our fifth date. And you know what happens on the fifth date?”
“Fifth date? Seriously, Jennie. Fifth date of the week.”
“Still, fifth date. Why Park Chaeyoung?” Jennie leans back, her eyes narrow sneakily at her girlfriend. “Are you trying to get fresh with me?”
“Whatever you dork.” Chaeyoung is one of the rare people in the world who could get away with calling Jennie a dork. “So, that’s a yes?”
“Yup.”
I promise, Jen. I will take you to the best restaurant in this country.”
“You mean your future restaurant?” Jennie smiles affectionately, enough to melt away a bit of hesitation in Chaeyoung.
“Someday, Jen… I promise, babe.”
“I’m looking forward to it, but for now-“
*
Six months, almost seven and Jennie still think she can’t stop staring for the life of her.
Here in her arms, is the love of her life, trembling as pleasure shoots at her every vein. When Chaeyoung's mind fails her and only yes, baby and more were the only words that exist. When she holds on to her for dear life as she collapses one more time tonight.
They fell back in bed, Chaeyoung still breathtaking under the moonlight streaming through her blinds, still breathtaking as sweat trickle down her milky skin. Chaeyoung will forever be her definition of breathtaking.
“Baby?”
“Hmmm?” Chaeyoung’s answer came out as creaky.
“I’m not your ex, you know,” Jennie confesses softly as if anything louder could break into the night. Her fingers are brushing away the loose strands of hair covering Chaeyoung’s face.
The dreamy gaze in Chaeyoung’s eyes instantly stilled at Jennie’s words. Her gaze quickly finds Jennie, searching for how this thought had suddenly occupied her mind, especially after the Earth-shattering moment they just had a few minutes earlier.
“No, no… of course not-” Chaeyoung inches closer to Jennie, cupping Jennie’s cheek in her hand. “She doesn’t even come close to you.”
“No, I mean…” Jennie moves closer and lays a kiss on Chaeyoung’s parted lips, letting their tongues tangle once again. “This. You. I don’t need you to spoil me, I mean I’m spoiled enough as it is. Being with you is more than enough for me.”
“You are more than I can dream of too, baby.”
Chaeyoung quietly confesses that got Jennie smiling. She pulls her close, tasting Chaeyoung’s words on her lips.
*
“Do you see it?”
There was so much eagerness in Chaeyoung’s voice that Jennie couldn’t help but feel bad for not “seeing” what Chaeyoung was so excited about.
Today is their one year anniversary, and instead of celebrating in some fancy restaurant, the two opted to go to Hungries where they first had their “unofficial date.” Jennie wasn’t complaining at all, the second she saw the huge gasp on Chaeyoung’s face this morning when she gives her her bracelet that she designed herself, Jennie knew that it is worth it.
They spend their entire day in bed, Chaeyoung woke up extra early to serve her a “fancy” breakfast of baked almond French toast, eggs benedict and mocktails even if Jennie assured her that she only wants to eat one thing all day.
It took a whole lot of effort to get her off the bed; it wasn’t until Chaeyoung promised to shower together that finally got Jennie out.
But now that she sees the bracelet jingling in Chaeyoung’s wrist and that huge smile on Chaeyoung’s face, Jennie could say that getting up was definitely worth it.
“See what?”
“Just… look…”
“Look where?”
Jennie wouldn’t have to ask if her girlfriend just tells her where to look specifically.
“Ummm…”
“Check the menu!”
The two heard Yeri shouting from inside the truck. Jennie’s eyes looked over at the overhead menu and finally saw it, underneath the ba dum dum noodles.
The Jennie . . . . . . 11.00
Jennie presses her lips together, trying hard not to smile at her cheesy girlfriend.
“Oh my God,” Chaeyoung squeaks, her cheeks bright red as she sees Jennie’s reaction. “It’s too cheesy; you don’t like it.”
“What? No… no… I…”
“You gave me a bracelet, and I gave you noodles.”
“A noodle dish name after me though,” Jennie cups her girlfriend’s cheeks, nudging her to look up at her. “How many people can say that? That I’m an inspiration for a noodle recipe.”
“It’s too cheesy.”
“Like how many kinds of cheese?”
Despite of her bad joke, Chaeyoung still looks defeated. Her attempt at a romantic declaration falling into the seams of k drama cheesiness.
“I’m sorry, baby.” She apologized, if she could paint over the ridiculous sign then she would “I’ll get you a better gi-“
“Hey Yer,” Jennie interrupted her girlfriend’s sulking. “Can you get me three orders of the Jennie please?”
“Hey… what are you doing?”
“What? I want one for here and the two for to go.”
“Chaeng,” Lil Chaeng asked from the kitchen “Are you gonna cook Jennie the Jennie? Or do you want me to-“
“I’ll do it,” Chaeyoung turns around to face her girlfriend. “What are you doing? I’ll just make you one at home for free.”
“No. I want to eat one now. I want one for my midnight snacks, one for my breakfast and one for my lunch tomorrow. Oh, wait… now that I think about it make me four orders.”
Yeri and lil Chaeng just shakes their head, while Lisa is squealing nonstop from the giddiness. Chaeyoung kisses Jennie on the lips before smiling at her.
“Wait here,”
Chaeyoung starts whipping everything and Jennie from the tables smiles as she angles her phone just right, to get a good picture of her pretty girlfriend.
“YUCKS!”
*
“Baby?”
“Hmm?”
“The bed is right there.”
“No,” Jennie groans, her teeth sinking in on Chaeyoung’s shoulder, while her hands gripped tightly on her girl’s waist, keeping her upright as she plans to take Chaeyoung right then and there.
“The door is just fine.”
Chaeyoung’s chuckle escapes as a breathless gasp, defenseless against Jennie’s touch. Her fingernails raked against the door, while her other hand latches behind her, gripping Jennie’s hair as she hears the low growl of her zipper. She felt fingertips slipping through her waistband, and the last words she heard that night was,
“Happy anniversary, my love.”
*
“Excuse me, I have to take this,” Jennie answers her phone before she can even get out of the conference room. “Babe?”
“Babe?”
“Hey… what’s wrong?” Jennie’s heart clenched in her chest when she heard the panic tone in her girlfriend’s voice. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”
“Yes! Yes… Baby, you know Chef Seungri?”
Everybody in this country does. He is known as the bad boy in the kitchens. With his kpop idol good looks and his charm, he was bound to make waves in the scene. His restaurants are famous for his eclectic and daring fusions of traditional and modern cooking. He manages to score cooking shows, three restaurants, endless scandals with idols and models and just everything you could think off.
Jennie couldn’t really give a , food is food, but her girlfriend put this er in such a high pedestal.
“The one you foam in the mouth for?”
“Baby seriously?”
“Okay, I’m sorry, yes I do.”
“He is here!”
Jennie sits up on her chair, just listening to her girlfriend’s voice going high pitch.
“Where? In the food park?”
“Yes.” Another squeal that got Jennie pulling her ear away from her phone. “And he ordered something from us.”
“Well, that’s great baby. I’m pretty sure whatever you make for him, he’ll be impressed.”
There was a sudden pause on the other line, with only the sizzling of the pans and inaudible conversations to keep her company.
“Chaeyoung?”
“Yes. I’m still here.” The excitement died down just by how low Chaeyoung’s voice went. Instead, it turned into a sense of nervousness. “But what if he doesn’t? I mean-”
“What do you always tell me?”
“What?”
“If one career path doesn’t work, there are still others. If for some reason he got a really ty taste in food and not like what you gave him, it’s going to be okay. There’s going to be others, much more out there, baby. But for now, go out there and show him what you got.”
“Or maybe he doesn’t have ty taste; maybe it’s my cooking.”
“I swear it’s his taste.” Jennie sits up again, the email in her screen just begging to get finished. But she shrugs it off, putting her entire focus on the girl in the other line. “Look, I know this will blow through your ego since you’re my girlfriend and all, but Chaeyoung your food is nothing short of ic.”
Jennie’s day is nothing short of ty, endless meetings, dissatisfied clients, a boss who wouldn’t get off her case and emails, countless emails. All it took was hearing her girlfriend giggle from the other line, and her day wasn’t so bad after all.
“So, if you have to choose between my cooking and -“
“Yup. Your food every time.” She smiles once again, this time much brighter than earlier. “Now take a deep breath.”
She hears Chaeyoung let out an exhale.
“There you go… now go get him, baby.”
*
“As much as we will miss the best cook that Hungries ever have,” Yeri raised in a toast and making Little Chaeng scowls grew deeper. “still, we can’t help but raised our glasses to the future head chef of VI restaurants, Big Chaeng…”
Yeri turns to the smiling Chaeyoung, who is snuggled comfortably next to Jennie. It was befitting that Chaeyoung celebrates her last day working in Hungries in Hungries. Jennie came to visit that day with her girlfriend speaking in jibberish, Yeri had to translate everything saying, Chef Seungri was quite impressed with Chaeyoung’s dish and offered her a position in his upcoming Gastropub FoodtoRatio. That’s right, staying true to his scandalous reputation he named his restaurant Food to Ratio.
“Thank you, Yeri. But I’m nowhere near head chef yet; I’m still an assistant.”
“So? Everyone’s gonna start somewhere. Soon, you’ll have your own restaurant.”
“What we have here is great guys.”
“Awwwwww…. I’m going to miss my bestie…” For someone with such skinny arms, Lisa could still manage to squeeze the life out of Chaeyoung.
“Thank you, Lisa. But c’mon, it’s not like I’m moving overseas, I just have a job now, that’s all.”
“Now that Chaeyoung is leaving, can I be called Chaeyoung now?” Lil Chaeyoung protested.
“Nope. Your lil Chaeng forever.”
As Lil Chaeng and Yeri continues to argue, Jennie took the time to press her lips against Chaeyoung’s forehead before she whispers,
“I’m so proud of you.”
*
“You call this medium well?!”
Chaeyoung flinches as Seungri just made her his once again. It’s almost been a whole month and everyday, there is something new that the head chef had something to yell to her about. For two whole months, she has been coming home exhausted and tearful and her poor girlfriend just holding her.
The dream job that she had always pictured, turned out more and more to be a living nightmare. She bonded well with the other chefs, all of them relating to Seungri’s reign of terror, all of them, expanding their vocabularies on insults.
“Do you know how medium well looks like, Chaeyoung?”
“I…I… I do chef.” Chaeyoung managed to answer in a peep.
“Obviously not! because look at this?”
Chaeyoung is a good 5’6, but everytime that Seungri goes into his rampage, it always made her shriveled into this mass of fear. “I… I’m sorry, chef. I’ll change it.”
“Well, you better. Don’t make me regret hiring you. The rest of you, get your together too!”
He storms out, carrying the air of tension along with him. As soon as the bad air cleared out, a tall beauty approaches the trembling Chaeyoung.
“Hey- it’s okay.” It was her Joy unnie, who was Chaeyoung’s first friend in this place. “Don’t take it personally; he’s an to everyone.”
“Yeah…thank you, unnie.”
“You’re doing good, Chaeng, on my first week, he threw a salad at my face.” Jinwoo, an oppa who is much prettier than her and Joy combined piped in.
“He smeared sushi all over my suit.” Hanbin, the goof points out. “From then on, I can’t eat sushi no more. So, yeah, don’t worry about it, you’re doing better than the rest of us.”
Chaeyoung just answers with a forced smile before turning back to the 8 ounce piece of steak. In her head, she asked herself, if this is the definition of doing good, she doesn’t know if she wants to see what doing bad looks.
*
“Hey Jen,” Joy says with trepidation, tilting her head over to the kitchen where Chaeyoung is slaving in front of a rack of ribs. A knife in her hand, a furious expression on her face as she slices the meat off the bone. “She’s right there, maybe you can convince her to go home.”
“Thank you.”
Joy and Jinwoo said their goodbyes in shallow whispers before stepping out of hell’s kitchen.
“Babe?”
“Baby?” Chaeyoung glances over to Jennie before going back to the tray of meat. “Hey, you can’t be in here.”
“Your boss already left, you’re the only one left.”
“Y-yeah, I’m just finishing this up for tomorrow. I don’t know how long it will take, I’ll just see you at home.”
“No. no… I’m waiting here for you.”
“You must be starving,” Chaeyoung moves away from the table and starts puttering around the kitchen, brushing away the tears that is dropping without her permission. “I could make you something real quick- I just-“
Jennie pulls Chaeyoung to her embrace, letting the tension melt away as she succumbs in her embrace.
“It’s okay, it’s okay, baby.”
Before Jennie knows it, Chaeyoung starts shaking in her arms, her entire body trembling as the frustrations and exhaustion pour out of her.
“Shhhh… shhh…” Jennie says softly, as she cradles Chaeyoung tighter. “I’m here, I’m here now, baby.”
“I don’t know what I’m doing wrong,” Chaeyoung confesses in the crook of Jennie’s shoulder. “I can’t even do a medium well steak. Like what was I thinking taking this job?”
“Hey, hey… look at me.” Jennie tilts her sweetheart’s face to look at her. Her heart squeezed tightly as she sees the hurt so visible in those gorgeous brown eyes. “It’s a ing steak. They need to get to over it.”
Chaeyoung smile softly, gently nodding.
“They have issues if they’re whining about a damn steak.” Jennie kisses Chaeyoung on her forehead. “It’s okay, baby. It’s going to be okay.”
“I’ll do better tomorrow.”
“You will.” Jennie presses another kiss on Chaeyoung’s forehead. “And if it’s not then don’t worry about it, because I’ll be here. Okay, love?”
The young chef could barely give Jennie a nod, her heart still aching from the insults today.
“T-thank you.” She manages to mumble out, before collapsing in Jennie’s embrace. She could feel her girlfriend’s arms holding her steady, just like before, just like always.
*
It turns out that tomorrow wasn’t any better or the few days after that. In less than a week, Jennie came home to Chaeyoung slumped over in the corner of their apartment, knees to her chest, face buried in regret.
“Hey… hey… what’s wrong?”
“I…I think I’m fired.” Chaeyoung’s answer came out muffled.
“Y-you think?”
“It’s just that; he was screaming at Jinwoo oppa today over a sauce, a freaking sauce! Saying if he focuses less on Hanbin’s and more on-“
Chaeyoung sees Jennie pursing her lips to stop herself from smiling, and it instantly got Chaeyoung snickering as well.
“He said that?”
“He did.”
“Wow… your boss is like wow. He is liking making Gordon Ramsey look like an angel.”
“Yeah right?” The two ended up giggling. “So, I told him that it’s him who needed to get his together because all we do is feed his gigantic ego.”
Jennie leans back, her face the picture of complete awe, “Wow… wow… my girl said that?”
“I know… I know,” Chaeyoung moans in despair. “And to make it worse I… I walked out.” Chaeyoung flinches from her erratic actions. “I…I shouldn’t have done that. I should have been more mature about it and not let my emotions take over.”
“Oh no…” Chaeyoung lifts her gaze up, her girlfriend has that beautiful, soft smile only meant for her to see. “How are we going to survive now? I guess I have no choice but to be a stripper now.”
“Yah.” Chaeyoung nudges Jennie on her side, before burrowing a smile on Jennie’s neck. “Are you okay with that? Stripping for a while?”
“I think I could manage. I need to get that pole dancing class to use.”
The two of them purses their lips to resist a laugh before finally bursting in chuckles. Their light laughter is coloring their once hopeless night.
“I’m so sorry, I should have just kept it in and just…”
“Hey.” Jennie tilts Chaeyoung’s chin upwards. “You don’t know how proud I am of you. You, the sweetest thing in the world.” Jennie professes while laying her lips on Chaeyoung’s hair. “Fighting back for what you believe in. My tough girl.”
“I…I… I could just go back to the food truck until I find another job.”
“It’s okay; my stripper job could provide for us for now.” They press their foreheads against each other. “Remember what you always say? If this doesn’t work out, there’s going to be something else and then if that doesn’t work, something else will.” Jennie intertwines their hands together before pressing another kiss on her palm. “But I’ll be here, no matter what job, what boss you have next, I’m here.”
“That’s all I need.”
Chaeyoung dips her head lower, pressing tender, thank you kisses on her girlfriend’s lips.
“So, is Hanbin’s really that hot?”
“Not as hot as yours, but it’ll do.”
They smile through their kisses, before diving deeper into each other.
*
“He gave me a promotion.”
Even from her peripheral, she could tell her girlfriend’s face just twisted in confusion. Jennie would have faced her if she wasn’t trying to maneuver through traffic. Chaeyoung really can’t say that she blames Jennie, she had been ing almost everyday about how terrible her work is and here she is, still willing to go further into the depths of hell.
“He made me the Sous chef. I know, right?” Chaeyoung shifts uncomfortably in the leather seat. “He said that it’s not everyday he has an employee who would dare say things to his face.”
“Did you accept it?”
“I- I did.”
“You did?”
Traffic or no traffic, Jennie finally looked at her, her expression filled with disbelief. Chaeyoung in her new job was like a nightmare. This was Chaeyoung’s chance to wake up and walk away from all of it.
“I just… no matter how much I hated it, I have to admit that there is a lot of things that I’m learning in this job that I don’t think I could learn just from cooking in the food truck.”
“Are you sure?”
“I am… I’ll be okay.”
“Okay.” Jennie looks like she’s about to protest but bites her tongue back. “Congratulations, baby.”
“Let’s go celebrate, baby. My treat.”
“Hmmm?”
Jennie glances at her and even in that millisecond she could see the excitement painted on Chaeyoung’s face. Her exasperation softens, how can she ever say no to that?
“Okay.”
*
“No, no, no baby, don’t pick that up.” Jennie never begs. She never does. Until now, when her command turned more into a plea. As she pleads for her girlfriend to remain in her arms.
“I-I-I won’t.” Chaeyoung’s words escape in every gasp, reassuring her girlfriend with a possessive kiss.
Their minds return to each other once again. The offensive contraption is ignored as it begs for attention in the bedside table. Their bodies continue to meld into one. Her every inhale is her lover’s exhale.
This night belongs to them, and in their world, it’s only the two of them.
No phones. No work. Nobody else. Just Chaeyoung, Just Jennie, just them.
*
Define okay.
Stable? Confident? Relax?
It’s those words but not this. Not constantly glancing at the clock every five minutes while her boss hounds each one of their team with everything from the kind of sauce, to how to cook the meat, to the dressing in the salad.
It’s been around two months since she had gotten her promotion and it felt more like torture than anything. Her hours are ridiculous, coming home around 2 am, the first few weeks, Jennie would be the dutiful girlfriend picking her up, only for her to fall asleep on the ride home. The next few weeks, Jennie would wait for her at home, only for her to fall asleep before they kiss each other good night. Nowadays, Jennie doesn’t even bother, Chaeyoung goes home to her girlfriend fast asleep.
“Jennie hey…” Chaeyoung’s kiss barely connected when she has to dart into the other side of the kitchen. “What are you doing here?”
“Guess, who got two tickets to the play tonight?”
Chaeyoung finally stops moving, just to give Jennie an exasperated look.
“Baby, you can’t drop in things like that last minute.”
“Chaeng, what’s the point of a surprise?”
“I don’t have that luxury anymore.” Chaeyoung’s voice sounded exhausted and annoyed and it was enough to back Jennie to a corner. “You know my job won’t allow that.”
“You know what? Maybe Jisoo unnie is free.”
“Yeah, maybe she is.” Chaeyoung kisses Jennie on the cheek which felt more like a bump than a sign of affection. “I’ll see you at home.”
Jennie opens to say anything, but she sees Chaeyoung already on the opposite side and she said to herself, why even bother?
*
“Wow…”
Chaeyoung barely glances away from her phone and her girlfriend’s lack of reaction, just gritted more into Jennie’s composure. Her knuckles were turning white as she gripped tighter on the steering wheel.
“So-”
“Huh?” Chaeyoung responded with an unintelligible hum, her brows still furrowed as she focuses on her phone.
“So, Jinwoo could get a day off, Joy could get a day off, Hanbin could get a day off, but when it’s you-“
“Baby- I’m the sous chef now, I also have to make sure every shift is covered. Look, we can still get something to eat before I-”
“Nah, you good. Should I drop you at work?”
Chaeyoung opens to say her apologies, but Jennie already has that hardened gaze, the impenetrable one that even Chaeyoung is afraid to go through.
“Baby I-“
“Don’t worry about it.” Jennie cuts her off with a lie.
*
“You going somewhere?” Joy pipes in after Chaeyoung looked at the clock for what felt like the 37th time.
Chaeyoung has a reputation around the kitchen as being the nicest one. But even she has her bad days, her frustration painted all over her face, brows scrunched up, and lips muttering curses in every breath.
“It’s just Jennie’s birthday today.”
“Oh yeah?" Joy grimaced at the thought. She had never seen two people so disgustingly in love. Joy is rooting for them to make it through, but even she couldn't help but see the crackles that this job is causing them.
"Jinwoo oppa picked a good day to quit.”
“I know, right? I just need to-”
“Hey, she’ll understand, right?”
A beat of silence as Chaeyoung refuse to find an answer to such a simple, obvious question.
“I don’t- I don’t know anymore.”
Joy replies with a weak smile, “She will. You guys are more in love than anybo-“
“Hey! Hey! Hey! I don’t give a what you two are gossiping about; this ain’t Dispatch! Hurry up with that Chimichurri sauce!”
Joy and Chaeyoung exchanged eyerolls before turning back to their bowls. The thought of it scares Chaeyoung, that what if it takes more than love to survive this?
*
This was their apartment, but she felt like a stranger as she walks in. Their home is filled with faces that used to be familiar but as time pass, Chaeyoung might as well stepped in, in a middle of a busy street in Seoul. Chaeyoung searched the room for her girlfriend but could only find Yeri holding two margaritas in each hand, alternating from one drink to the other.
“Whoah, easy there, tiger.”
“Oh, Big Chaeng!” Yeri greets her before sipping on an icy cold margarita. She let out an ahhhhhh, reminding Chaeyoung of soda commercials. “Lil Chaeng did justice to your Margarita recipes, man. This strawberry pineapple is lit! But hey… I’m just holding this one for Lisa while she helped Lil Chaeng with the food.”
“You’re gonna be lit, if you finished both.”
Yeri answers her with a scoff before taking another sip.
“I have to check on them,” Chaeyoung peers over Yeri to look at the kitchen, Lil Chaeng despite of her height could always take command of any place. “Have you seen Jennie?”
“She’s over there…” Yeri tilts her head over to the balcony where Jennie along with what looks like co-workers are enjoying some drinks and from what Chaeyoung can see a cigarette.
“Oh, look who finally got out of work.” Jennie greets her, Chaeyoung wasn’t sure if it’s meant as a joke or as a half truth. “Hey, my love.”
“Hey, happy birthday.” Their lips brush in a gentle kiss, Chaeyoung wincing as she tasted the nicotine and sting of the alcohol in her girlfriend’s usual sweet lips. “Are you smoking?”
“Yeah, it’s my birthday who is stopping me?”
Chaeyoung purses her lips together, refusing to bite back when she sees how Jennie is already flushed from the alcohol. Instead, Chaeyoung focused her attention on Jennie’s coworkers.
“Hey, Seulgi unnie, Eunae unnie.”
“Hey Chaeyoung,” The taller beauty greets her with a warm smile. “We were just saying how we haven’t seen you in a while.”
“Yeah, I… things have just been crazy at work.”
“I know, poor Jennie here haven’t been eating.”
It was a joke, it was meant to be a joke, but those words stung more than Chaeyoung could ever imagine.
“Well, to be fair there, unnie. I haven’t seen Chaeyoung in a while too. I’m starting to forget that I have a girlfriend.”
Chaeyoung turns around to face Jennie so quickly, but her girlfriend just looks so nonchalant as she took another sip of her drink.
“C’mon, let’s go inside.” Jennie wraps her arm around Chaeyoung’s waist, leading her back inside in the middle of the living room.
“Okay everybody, my girlfriend is here, now we can really start the party.”
Everyone in the apartment turns to the beautiful couple standing in the front and started hollering, drinks in hand raised up in a toast.
“First of all, I want to say thank you guys for coming on time. Despite the traffic and your work, you guys still manage to be here at the right time.”
Chaeyoung’s gaze hardened at how Jennie’s words are pulling together to form vicious assaults. This is not her baby, even when mad Jennie still remains gentle with her. But not right now, her girlfriend’s usual expressive eyes are unreadable under the haze of the alcohol.
“Secondly, I want to say thank you, to my amazing girlfriend, who planned or no- not really planned- paid, yeah that’s the right word, paid Lil Chaeng to plan my 30th birthday party. Everything from the decorations and the catering to this goddamn cake, my girlfriend got it. My Chaeyoung is a chef by the way, but she didn’t cook any of this. But that doesn’t matter anymore, cause the food is amazing, lil Chaeng. so ummm… you guys enjoy and enjoyed this catered food.”
The excitement in the apartment turned into suffocating tension. Everybody eyeing each other, wondering what had just happened, even Yeri who has a say in everything was struggling to formulate words. The birthday girl is gulping the last drops of her Hennessey while Chaeyoung stood pale and frozen next to her, like all life has been washed away from her.
It wasn’t until Jisoo, broke the awkward atmosphere by raising a toast.
“YEHEY!”
*
As soon as the last guest left their apartment, the only things that remain are Jennie’s vicious words still hanging in the air and Chaeyoung’s shattered heart scattered all over the place.
That barrage of spiteful words was as soothing as the alcohol trickling down . It gave Jennie that triumphant feeling, that for once since Chaeyoung’s promotion that she isn’t the pitiful one in their relationship. That she isn’t the one trying to find time for each other. That for once, she doesn’t need Chaeyoung as much as she does. But that gratifying feeling didn’t last long, Chaeyoung pulled away from her as soon as she was steady enough to suffer from her blows. Chaeyoung joined Lil Chaeng in the kitchen, putting up a front of plating and preparing the food instead of the more obvious reason.
“Y-you could go to sleep now, I’ll clean up.”
Chaeyoung, her Chaeyoung, or was her Chaeyoung, (a thought so excruciating she refused to hear it) is still too generous to a fault.
“N-no Chaeyoung, you’re probably tired from work. I’ll ummm clean…” Jennie said with a grimace at her horrible attempt of diffusing the situation.
Chaeyoung answers Jennie with a pained scoff, “That’s probably more ammo for your next speech, huh?”
Jennie locked eyes with her, ready to pour more venom into their already toxic conversation. She had expected to see anger. It would have been easier if it would have been anger that she is face to face with. But no, the Gods always seem to know how to put her into more agony, when instead of fury she sees Chaeyoung’s brown eyes blurred with tears from the heartache.
“I-I- I’m sorry, Jen. That didn’t come out, right.” Chaeyoung apologizes as it was enough to salvage the horrible wreckage their relationship had suffered tonight.
“I-I-I didn’t mean it like that. It’s your day, you shouldn’t be cleaning. Good night, ba- Jen.”
“Oh Really?” Of course, Jennie opened the can of worms, now she must deal with the consequence.
“I think you have said enough, Jen.” Chaeyoung shoves Jennie out of the way with her shoulder, as she storms to the kitchen. “I heard you loud and clear.”
“Good, now you know how ing fun my party is. How about you? Everything fine and dandy over there in your restaurant?” Jennie said with such spite.
Chaeyoung does a spectacular job of dodging both Jennie and her questions. She threw the plates into the sink before going on a rampage of washing every dish with such rage that Jennie almost thinks it’s comical.
“What do you expect me to do?” Chaeyoung’s voice quivered as tears start to tear her apart. “To be okay with everything you said?”
“But it’s true! It’s my ing birthday. You ing miss dates, that’s okay, you come home late, that’s okay… But c’mon Chaeyoung, it’s my birthday! But where were you?!”
But she didn’t even give Chaeyoung a chance to answer because the next thing Jennie knew, she was spewing out more toxic.
“You know what? I don’t give a where you were-” Jennie starts backpedaling, holding her arms up in mock surrender. “You want to stay here and clean? Sounds good to me. Good night, bab-“ Jennie hissed as she almost let the sweet nickname slipped from her lips. “Chaeng, thanks for the ing party.”
Chaeyoung just responded with a weak nod, before turning once again to the plates. The sight of the love of her life, hovered over the sink, knuckles turning white as she gripped tightly on the counter was sobering for Jennie.
“I don’t know what else to say, Jen.”
“Yes, you do! Tell me anything, something, Chaeng!” Jennie says, her voice gripped with the fear that Chaeyoung is giving up, that those words, “I don’t know what else to say”, meant she ran out of reasons to fight for them.
But Jennie refuses to end here. She refuses to leave, if letting Chaeyoung hurl vicious words at her is what would make her feel better then so be it. She could take it. She’ll go to hell for Chaeyoung, and hopefully, Chaeyoung would feel the same as well.
“Tell me how ing mad you are! Tell me why there is always something else more important than us! Tell me how much you ing hate me!”
“I wish I do! I wish I do, Jen!” Jennie takes a step back unfamiliar at Chaeyoung’s furious tone. She sees Chaeyoung’s chest gasping for air as if it took her entire energy to pour out all the pain. “-that would be so much easier. It will be so much easier to walk out of here if I do… but I don’t.”
Chaeyoung’s last three words sounded like a plea.
“I love you- I love you so much.” Chaeyoung continues, her voice creaking with pain at every word. “I love you so much, Jen - You think I want that? I want to be with you too! It’s just that-“
“What? What Chaeyoung? Something else is more important, right?”
This time, it’s Jennie whose words that sounded like a plea.
Chaeyoung took an unsteady step closer, and with shaky hands cups Jennie’s tear-stricken cheeks as she begs,
“Baby please, just be patient, When I-“
“When you what? Chaeyoung, when you what? Cause I swear I heard this before. I promise baby, when I’m more settled in my job, or I promise baby when I get this promotion or I promise baby, when I have my own branch of the restaurant. How long do I have to be patient, Chaeng? Cause I’m getting tired too.”
Jennie succumbs to her hurt and anger as she falters right there in their kitchen floor. The emotions that she had always kept at bay, fearing that it could one day crack her beautiful relationship with Chaeyoung finally shattered from the weigh that she had been bearing all alone.
Alone. That word scares the out of her, but not as much as the words; a life without Chaeyoung does.
“I’m sorry…”
Those two words escape Chaeyoung’s lips so softly, it barely made a dent in the air. Those two words sounded dreamlike and something out of a fantasy, something soothing after all scalding words they were throwing at each other earlier.
She felt Chaeyoung’s arms wrapped around her and it felt like the first time. Those blissful moments that she thought will just become distant memories from a love that belonged in a different lifetime, starts coming back again, slowly but surely. Chaeyoung continues to tremble in her embrace, the love of her life, succumbing in her arms.
“I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry. I just… I just want to give you everything.”
“I don’t want everything, Chaeyoung.” Jennie pulls away, resting her forehead against Chaeyoung as she confesses, the four words that will remain constant, no matter how many storms pass them, or how many circles of hell they have to go through.
“I just want you.”
Need. Love. Adore. Dictionaries are filled with words much more anchored than the word want. The word want seems superficial, saved for useless toys or for things used for vanity and pleasure.
But for Jennie, the word want becomes a whole different story. In a world, where you need air, food, love, in the end, there is just one thing she will seek for, this girl, broken and imperfect in her arms.
And there is nothing and no one else she would want more.
*
That morning felt like waking up in an entirely different world. She buries a sleepy smile on her pillow as she woke up to the slivers of sunlight slipping through their blinds and the sweet kisses her Chaeyoung is pressing along the length of her back.
Jennie had no idea how she and Chaeyoung still managed to end up in her bedroom. She could already imagine the trail of clothes from the kitchen to their living room all the way to their bedroom floor, but she’ll deal with the mess later, right now, with Chaeyoung next to her, she’s ready for a few more extra minutes of sleep.
But of course, her girlfriend has other plans, teasingly nibbling on her ear before whispering,
“Good morning, ahjumma.”
“Yah!” Jennie screeches, her voice still croaky from last night. “The , baby.”
“What?” Chaeyoung kisses her in the cheek, and that’s what all it takes to get Jennie smiling once again. “I like older women.”
“Remind me not to drive by any elderly centers.”
Chaeyoung responded with a jab on her rib, Jennie’s lips curve triumphantly before turning around to face her girlfriend. Chaeyoung, with her curls puffier from the night’s activity, her eyes puffy from all the tears spilled, lips swollen from all the kisses and neck and shoulders marked with her love. This is her girl and Jennie loves every inch of her.
She intertwined her fingers with Chaeyoung’s, those long digits playing her expertly. But she noticed Chaeyoung’s hand that she failed to see last night and the past few months.
“What happened?” Jennie asked as she runs her finger along the different cuts and scars along Chaeyoung’s hand, her voice is laced with so much softness that it made Chaeyoung lean over to kiss her again.
Chaeyoung tugs her hand away gently before kissing Jennie once again, “Part of the job, I’m okay.”
Jennie presses her lips on every scar and burn. “So, Jinwoo quit on my birthday, huh?”
“Yup. He finally decided that he is done with the chef life and pursue his real dream as a kpop idol.”
Jennie flashes a drowsy smile, before curling herself into Chaeyoung’s embrace.
“Well, good for him. You can’t let all that beauty hide away behind the kitchen.”
Chaeyoung nuzzles in Jennie’s shoulder, her giggle tickling Jennie. “That’s true. I don’t even want to stand next to him cause I’ll just get self esteem issues.”
“Awwww… my baby, you’re pretty too.” Jennie pats Chaeyoung’s head. “He’s prettier but you’re a close second.”
Chaeyoung burrows herself deeper in Jennie’s embrace, before she whispers out words,
“I was so scared last night.”
Jennie lifts her head up so she could look at her girl, but Chaeyoung’s face is still buried in her side. “What?”
“I just thought that this was it,” Chaeyoung slowly wraps her arms around Jennie’s waist, pulling her closer. “That it’s over and I didn’t know-“
“Shhhh… shhhh… no more, no more baby.” Jennie gently shushes her girlfriend, resting her forehead against hers. “I’ll fight for you, okay? I’ll fight for you over and over again. Just promise me, that no matter how hard it ing gets, you’ll choose me, that you’ll choose us.”
Chaeyoung nodded softly, feeling the weigh off her chest slowly being lifted. She always says before that she will always pick love, it’s a word often said, but hardly felt. Yet everything changed when she fell in love with Jennie.
And the word, which before was only part of a fantasy started to become real until it became something tangible, and something to hold and someone to love and cherish.
Love have now became her.
*
“So, this place is named one of the top five restaurants by GQ magazine-“
This was one thing that always impressed Jennie about Jisoo, is that when it’s time to turn on the charm, she turns it on to the maximum level. They are seconds away from landing the biggest contract in their company, and Jisoo just continues to blow away their Chinese clients with her impressive gift of gab.
In a way, it’s good that the clients are all focus on Jisoo, cause it gives Jennie the chance to look at the articles framed proudly at the entrance. Various magazines raving about her fiancée’s restaurant. There is a picture of Chaeyoung with Seungri and Joy standing next to her. Articles listing them as the best, two years in the row but there’s one list that Jennie couldn’t help but smile smugly about. Right there, the J noodles named best noodles in the entire country. And when you live in an Asian country that revolves around noodles, that honor is ing crazy.
“Hello,” The girl who used to have that bright cute smile has now transformed into this devious beauty. Yeri still owning the gig even after all these years. “I’m Yeri and welcome to Ruby Janes…” She said while giving Jennie the stink eye that just had Jennie clicking her tongue in amusement. “I’m the manager so if you need anything please don’t hesitate to let me know.”
Jisoo who is still in her work mode had the clients trailing behind her when they were out of earshot, Jennie didn’t wait to ruffle the manager’s hair.
“Hey!” Yeri hissed, “You better quit or I’ll-“
“You’ll what, tell the owner on me?”
To which Yeri just replied with a huff.
Jennie walks into the restaurant, still blown away by how her girlfriend who used to be sweating inside a food truck has now created this vision. The restaurant has become a must see and dine in the city and she doesn’t even have to wonder why. She looked over to the bar, with Lisa looking over the bartender, until she caught her eye and soon, Jennie sees the scrawny kid again as Lisa gives her a huge smirk and two gigantic thumbs up.
*
“Park Chaeyoung!”
Chaeyoung who was teaching the new chef the perfect way to cook a medium well steak looked over to her business partner. Joy who has that knowing look on her face, arms cross and lips turned into a smirk. They have been discussing this, Chaeyoung’s gentle nature around their chefs is both a blessing and a curse.
“Yes?”
“Look who is sitting over at table 8.”
Chaeyoung excused herself before walking over by the double doors, instantly smiling as soon as she peeked.
“Chanwook-shii?”
The overly enthusiastic server beamed when his gorgeous boss calls for his attention.
“Yes, chef?”
“Can I see the order for table 8?”
“Oh.” He hands over the paper to his boss. “Here you go, Chef.”
“Thank you.” Chaeyoung scans the list and immediately smiles as recognized in an instant what her fiancée’s order. She scratches it out before turning around to grab a porcelain plate.
“Don’t worry I got this one.”
*
Jennie and Jisoo exchanged knowing smirks as they saw the client’s faces glowed at the delectable dishes placed in front of them. But the look of pride in Jennie’s face quickly fell as a garden salad is placed right in front of her. She wasn’t into nepotism and using her connections, but she was ready to put the server through hell, raging that her fiancée owns this place to get her order mixed up for a damn salad.
“Excuse me, this isn’t what I or-“ Jennie notice the folded note that came along with her food.
She opens the note and scoffs at the tease,
You got a salad, so what are you going to do about it? :p
*
The entire kitchen staff watches in awe as the gorgeous woman in a Chanel suit strode into their kitchen with such vindication. Of course, everybody on the staff knew their boss’ fiancée, she had been a constant in their restaurant since the very beginning. Their boss and her fiancée always try to be discreet with their actions, a brush of the hair and a goodbye kiss on the cheek always keeping an arm's length to feign being professional. If only their heart eyes and gooey smiles didnt betray them.
This was the first time that they saw them act so playful, as Jennie made Chaeyoung squeal from a backhug, using this to attack her with tickles. Their liplock both sweet and hot at the same time.
“Terrible.” Jennie points out at her smirking fiancée. “Terrible service.”
“Seriously?! Not in my kitchen you two!”
Someone needs to remind Lil Chaeng that even with a scowl and her arms planted firmly on her side, that she is still around the height of a kindergartner and is still cute as a button.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry…” Chaeyoung bows apologetically at her head chef, before nudging her future wife out the double doors. “Next meal is on me.”
*
“Complements of the chef.”
Jennie shuts down her laptop screen as she sees a large plate of noodles served in front of her before Chaeyoung sat a couple of inches away from her.
“Why are you sitting there? Come sit here.”
“Babe…”
The organized chaos that it was a few hours ago had now become a place of solitude. The lights are now dimmed and the entire place b with laughter and people earlier have now become their own little place.
Jennie tugs Chaeyoung over to her, her girlfriend who runs a staff of almost 30 like a general commanding an army, was whining and pouting in her arms.
“I have been working all day.”
“Oh c’mon, that tall chef hat doesn’t help? Let’s see…” Jennie pressed her nose against Chaeyoung’s hair while stealing a kiss. “Is it seared scallops in pesto sauce?”
“Maybe… I’m not saying,” Chaeyoung protest, while fiddling with Jennie’s fingers. Jennie smiling back as she sees Chaeyoung’s ring finger, the pear cut diamond engagement ring cost Jennie’s entire year salary, but damn it’s so worth it.
“Definitely some veal marsala right there…”
“Is this your revenge for that salad, huh?” Chaeyoung tried to sound defiant.
“Wait… wait… wait… one more, ahhhh prawn noodles.” Jennie said, chest puffed in pride while Chaeyoung has her eyes narrowed, cheeks all puffed up as she huffed.
“That’s it, I’m calling off the wedding. It’s over now, Jennie Kim.”
Jennie retaliated with a playful kiss but the playfulness didn’t last long. Their hello kiss growing passionate by the second. The lovers going lightheaded at the lack of air, but both refusing to pull away. It was only when Chaeyoung heard the growl of her zipper, that she’s quick to still her lover’s hand.
“What’s our rule, Jen?”
Jennie rolls her eyes, it was a rule that Jennie has made her life long goal to break.
“What’s our rule?” Chaeyoung scolds her in a mischievous tone.
“Anywhere except the restaurant,” She mumbled like a spoiled brat, that got denied of what she wants. But her reaction got her girl smirking victoriously.
“I can’t hear you, what is it again?”
“Anywhere except the restaurant.”
“That’s right.” Chaeyoung pulls Jennie’s face towards her, giving her a loud smack on the lips. “My smart baby.”
Jennie who was frowning from the rejection, now has a smile that instantly got Chaeyoung smiling back. The restauranteur traces her lover’s face, her smile softening as she reminisces words that she used to believe belong in fairy tales…
They were going to be the story that is going to be defined with the word “almost.”
The beautiful couple who were so in love and almost made it but couldn’t survive their crash and fall.
The couple who almost had their fairy tale ending. The couple who almost had it all but then lost it in the end.
But they weren’t…
When asked how did they manage to survive when they were about to crash and fall; or how they rewrote their story when everybody already expected a tragic ending; and how they came out of hell together much stronger than before, their answers couldn’t be simpler.
Love is not always pretty. It’s not always butterflies and fluttering feelings. Love could be brutal and gut and heart wrenching at times. Love can be torn down by words but could be build up again by actions.
And In a world, where it would have been easier to give up, the two of them would always find a reason to fight for what they have and choose love.
Brutal, painful and hard love.
But still, always love.
Their lips met once more in the sweetest kiss before Jennie tugs her upwards,
“Ready to go?”
“Where to?”
A naughty smirk graces Jennie’s lips before she answers her future wife and the love of her life.
“Anywhere except the restaurant.”
THE END
Once again... Thank you very much for giving this fic a glimpse. I hope you guys enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. hehehe!
Happy anniversary blackpink and power up Red Velvet!!!
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