“Oppa! You’re up!” a surprised grin lighting up her face.

“Yes, Chaerinnie, I’m up.” I sigh, voice and expression conveying my current state of exhaustion and despair. Okay, so I may have a flair for the dramatic. I like to think it’s one of my many charms.

“Eh, what’s wrong oppa? Ah now, this won’t do at all. I called because I missed your smile; I wanted to see it. It looks like you’ve misplaced it though. Aish you’re always losing things. I’ll give you a minute to go find it. Pali-pali.” She said bossily, adding a quick jerk of her head, as if telling me to go off in search of it.

“Yah, dongsaeng don’t you sass me. Aish, this cheeky brat…” I shout back at her, a smile already threatening to erase the sad, pitiful expression I’d been cultivating all evening.

“Who, me? I would never.” Husky chuckle. “But in all seriousness, how are you? It’s been so long, oppa. Weeks! I miss you! Instagram tells me you’ve been busy with your album, working so hard you don’t even have time to shave that ridiculous scruff off your face. How’s it going?”

“Hey, don’t you insult the scruff. Its makes me look artistic…and sophisticated dammit!” I shoot an exaggerated glare her way as I lovingly and protectively pet my valiant, though somewhat underwhelming, attempt at a mustache. “As for the album, ah you know. Same as always.”

“So you mean, the same soul-crushing, mind-numbing, all-consuming cluster it always is?”

I laugh, “Yeah…that about sums it up.”

“Who’re you working with?”

“Kush, Choice, the usual gang.” Holding the phone in one hand, elbows resting on my knees, I cocked my head to the side, letting my gaze drift aimlessly once again toward the night skyline, running my hand through my hair. “We’re laying down some good tracks. There are a few really good ones, you know, ones I’m really feelin, though they still need some significant tweaking. Then there’s a bunch of other ones that could make the cut. Don’t have them quite where I want them…But you know, gotta decide which ones and just commit soon…Deadlines coming up as usual…And there’s all the planning for the tour, which of course can’t really move forward until the music’s been decided on…”

“And, all this stuff with Tabi…it’s been rough Chae. We both know I’ve had my own fair share of scandals; I know first-hand how hard that is. But this…People are angry. Like really angry. They want to see him suffer. And with him already serving and all of us going into the military soon; this could be the last thing people remember of us; we don’t even have time to put out more music, make people forgive & forget, move past this…Maybe this album can help a little with that…that’s my hope…but I don’t know…it’s gotta be good…it really needs to be good…” After a minute I realized I had just trailed off, my mind skimming across all the unresolved details of my most recent project, then hurtling towards other, bigger, more heartbreaking unknowns.

I look back at the phone. I can see her looking back at me, her expression a perfect mix of caring, concern and comfort; whatever the facial expression equivalent of a hug was, that’s how she looked right then. That look quickly brought me back to my senses.

“Aish…but you didn’t call for this. You know, now that you mention it, I could have sworn I saw that smile around here just a second ago…must have wandered off, that little bastard, but I know it’s here somewhere.” I say, looking around, checking my pockets, a pretend look of confusion on my face.

“Oppa…You’re working hard, Oppa.” She said, her voice full of encouragement. “I spoke with Tabi just a few days ago, and I – I can’t imagine what you’re going through with all of that. But you’re doing well. And I know t