Life can be sometimes up and down, even if you're always positive in life. There's always negative just to make it balance. Because making too much is not good too. Too much positivness can bring you down too, so it's better to make everything balance. In a relationship, you thought it's perfect to be in love. You're always thinking about the person you're inlove to. Thinking about your future and your plans together, not worrying and just dreaming. So many non expected things can happen. So it's good to be ready. Because life is boring if there's only too much happiness. 

We're so happy and we thought our life,relationship is perfect. We have love, faith and hope. We thought things are going well when life suddenly crash down for me, for her, for us. Hwang Eunbi-- mostly i called her Sinb, she's so mysterious. she's now experiencing and she has this physical trauma. it affects her brain so she has this temporary memory lost. She can remember some, it flashes in her mind i think, but suddenly she's getting wild and shout in me. I can't understand some of her words, but still i try, i tried to understand her. 

She became depressed after her parents died. I tried to help her, but she's pushing me away and saying that she can handle it by herself. I let her, i leave her alone because i think it can help her. But i'm wrong, it just make things worse. And now she's in this kind of situation. She let her emotion to affect her physically that's why she has this Physical trauma. I'm the worse girlfriend, i know. i let her alone instead of staying by her side. I let her deal with her problems instead of listening to her and help her to move on. I let her cry all night instead of helping her to wipe all of her tears. I let her suffer instead of helping her. I blame myself from all of this. I just stay with her in good terms, but when the bad terms comes, Why i can't help her? this is my fault.

"Sinb, you need to eat" I keep pleading her to eat because she's just staring at nowhere and not talking to me

"Sinb please" i said as my voice crack and as my tears fell down. I can only look down because i won't let her see me like this. Being weak and coward. I need to be strong even if she can't remember me nor talk to me