The wedding was gorgeous. They held it in a chapel, white pillars along the outsides of the pews, beautiful flowers intertwining around them. Vibrant roses, arbutuses, and dahlias surrounded the room, giving it a fresh and sweet atmosphere. 

And, of course, Bobby asked Donghyuk to be his best man. He could never say no to that pleading face, even at the cost of seeing the man he loved marry someone else. So he agreed, quietly and downcast, but unnoticed by Bobby who was just happy his best friend said yes.

Now, here he was, watching Hanbin being walked down the aisle by his father, absolutely glowing with pure joy and love as he gazed at Bobby. His father handed him off to the groom and Bobby held his hands so gently, with warmth in his eyes that only Hanbin had the honor of being subjected to.

He heard the priest start the ceremonial vows, but it was all static in his ears as he fought to keep tears from spilling down his face. This was Bobby and Hanbin’s big day, the day their love would be finalized on paper and acknowledged by the world. Of course Donghyuk had to look happy, no matter how much his heart felt like it shattered with every word.

The priest’s voice broke through his thoughts, “Speak now, or forever hold your peace.” Donghyuk’s breath caught and he had a wild thought of actually speaking up. Of finally spilling how he really felt about his best friend, all his desire and longing he kept hidden for more than a decade.

He would object, profess his undying love for Bobby – and then what? Then Bobby would hate him for trying to take him away from Hanbin, for thinking he ever had a chance, for ruining what was supposed to be the happiest day of his life.

And Hanbin – god, he had always been so kind to Donghyuk, even when he’d been immature and shunned him back when he was younger because he had mistakenly taken his anger out on him. Donghyuk didn’t think he could live with seeing the hurt and shock in the older’s eyes.

So, he stayed quiet. The ceremony continued on, the rings were placed on by each other, and they were finally wed after almost a decade of being in love. Hanbin and Bobby leaned in for the kiss, the one thing that would finalize the end of their wedding and Donghyuk’s one-sided love.

All within hours, Donghyuk’s world dulled, and he pasted on a stiff smile as all the guests cheered at the kissing couple. He clapped, avoiding the eyes of his friends, who would immediately know something was off.

He’d managed to keep his feelings hidden from all of them this entire time, he wasn’t about to expose himself so pathetically at Bobby and Hanbin’s wedding.

Jinhwan sidled next to him and Donghyuk held in his flinch. He cursed inwardly as the rest of the group joined them, Bobby and Hanbin interlocking arms with matching rings shining on their hands.

Junhoe lifted up his glass of champagne and laughed. “To the happy couple!” They clinked their drinks and happily drank, Donghyuk only sipping. With his poor tolerance, he couldn’t afford getting wasted in public – he was an emotional drunk and that meant danger.

“It was about damn time too!” Jinhwan grinned, eyes twinkling and glass already empty. Donghyuk gave a hollow laugh.

“It’s been almost a decade that I’ve had to deal with Bobby being lovesick, maybe I’m finally free,” he joked. The group roared with laughter as Bobby pouted at him, pretending to be upset.

Until Hanbin leaned his head against Bobby’s shoulder, smiling up at him lovingly. Then Bobby’s attention was off Donghyuk and only on his husband.

Husband. Even thinking the word made Donghyuk want to throw up. He excused himself, saying he had to go to the bathroom, and hid outside the sanctuary.

He buried his face in his hands and took deep breaths, slowly breathing in and out before a tear slipped out and he choked. After that, he couldn’t stop. Donghyuk sobbed quietly into his palms, hiccuping and coughing, his heart breaking at the seams.

Even with the knowledge that nothing would’ve ever happened between him and Bobby, it didn’t stop the hurt at what could have been. If Bobby’s heart had only been open to him, if Bobby didn’t look at him like a little brother.

Would they have that almost telepathic connection the two shared? Would their love grow as the years passed, or would it wilt because he wasn’t Hanbin? Would they be happy? Donghyuk thought he would be better off not knowing, because he was so, so scared of the answer.

A warm arm wrapped around him and he startled. “Hey,” the stranger said, voice soothing and concerned, “are you okay?” Donghyuk made a strangled noise, wiping his face roughly and smiling a wobbly smile.

He looked up and saw a handsome man standing next to him, dress shirt rolled up to expose tattoos and a beer in his hand. Donghyuk couldn’t stop himself from laughing, a hysterical little thing, and sobbing out, “I just watched the man I love marry someone else. So, no, I’m not that okay.”

The stranger only nodded, calm in the face of Donghyuk’s breakdown. “Me, too,” he replied wistfully, grinning sardonically at Donghyuk’s shocked look.

“Yup,” he said. Taking a long drag of beer before sighing, he held the bottle out to Donghyuk. Donghyuk grabbed it and downed it, pressing the cold glass to his cheeks. “I’m in love with Hanbin. But he’s in love with Bobby.”

Chuckling self-deprecatingly, he continued, “And there’s no way I could ever compete with Bobby. Not in Hanbin’s eyes.”

Donghyuk sniffled, leaning his head against the other’s shoulder. “And I’m in love with Bobby. What a mess we are.”

“I’ll raise a glass to that,” he muttered, turning a small smile to Donghyuk. “I’m Jung Jaewon, Hanbin’s close friend and co-worker of four years. What’s your name and tragedy, fellow mess?”

“Kim Donghyuk,” he answered, tiredness weighing him down. “For more than a decade, Bobby’s best friend and Hanbin’s close friend. And Bobby’s best man.” Jaewon winced in sympathy and he nodded. “Yup.”

They stood there, taking comfort in the fact that they were both stuck in disaster. Donghyuk shook himself, straightening up. “They’ll be wondering where I am,” he whispered, “I think this is too long to be in the bathroom.”

Jaewon laughed, broken and sad. “Then you best be going back.” He nudged Donghyuk and added, “It’s nice to know I’m not the only fool here.”

Donghyuk smiled, holding out his hand, “I hope we meet again, fellow mess.”

Jaewon grinned, whipping out a pen and grabbing Donghyuk’s outstretched wrist. “Definitely,” he said, scribbling his number on Donghyuk’s bare arm.

“Maybe we can help each other out of this mess.” Jaewon left with a flounce, the doors to the chapel shutting quietly and Donghyuk stood there, staring down at the numbers.

“Maybe,” he said to himself, smiling a little bit. “Just maybe.” He released a quick breath and plastered on a bright smile, feeling better after that breakdown.

Maybe they could heal each other. One broken idiot to another. It would be a start.

With that hope, Donghyuk walked back to his friends with a joke on his tongue and laughter on his lips.