[Mark POV]

Inhale.

Exhale.

Breathe.

The air.

I breathe.

******

I could hear some small noise far from behind me. Not that clear but more like humming. It’s not something new, heck, this is one of familiar kind of noisy that I’ve known in my entire life. So strange. Even until now, I still find it strange with this surrounding. All of sudden you feel your body go numb and it’s just pitch black in front of you. It feels like you fall asleep, except in absolute black room, so you can see absolutely nothing even the slightest light or glimpse of movement.

I don’t know how long I’ve been gone,  or who is in control now. I don’t even know where am I and what have I done today after switching. I hate it why me, as The Core, can’t see what The Others do with my body. Yet, 2 of my personality can see everything. They know what is going on like they are in some kind of control room looking at the screen 24/7. I mean, this is my body. I should be responsible if anything happened because of my body, with or without my conscious.

Suddenly, I heard something, “…rk...Mark...” He calls me. That familiar voice became clearer and clearer. “Mark… is that you who I’m speaking with now?”

I open my eyes slowly.  I saw an old man sitting in front of me. He leaned back to his chair looking at me while waiting for my response.

“Yes…” I answer shortly.

He sighed a bit relieve, “Good. Welcome back, Mark.” He said with a wide smile on his face.

I recognized him as Dr. Choi. He was my psychiatrist for 12 years now. The fact that we were at Dr. Choi’s room now, reminded me that today indeed we had a counseling session with Dr. Choi. I love how smell nice of this room.  Since I was a kid, Dr. Choi always put a bouquet of lavender flower to his room and changed it every once a week. He likes the scent, he said. Plus, its color can go together with his brown room, at least doesn’t make his room look boring. Now, I can see the flower stand inside a vase at the top of his desk.

I noticed I sat down on the usual sofa and there’s a half full glass of tea at the tiny table beside me. I guess one of us already start the counseling with Dr. Choi. “Jaebum was here. He told me he just bought a CD that he’s already waiting for today. And I think you should know that he also bought a pair new piercing to your right ear.” Dr. Choi told me as his finger pointing to my right ear. I touched my right ear and felt a little sting because of that new set of piercing. And not just that, I can feel both of my ears full of another Jaebum’s piercing. Not again!

“! I told him before that he’s not allowed to pierce my ears ever again. Guess he never listens.”

“And why can’t he?”

“Because I don’t like it! It’s still ok if just one or two. But this… don’t I look like one of those tribe people on NatGeo show?“

Dr. Choi laughed at my words. “Know what, I will help you to talk to Jaebum. It’s your body after all, and you deserve some respect for it. Anyway, how’s your feeling today Mark?”

“Good. A bit tired, but good.” I tried to remember what happened to me before I switched to Jaebum.

The last thing I remembered was I woke up this morning already felt exhausted because the other one of me decided to switch then went wild and got drunk all night. I guessed he always got bored and in crave for a clamorous party. But I’m so much fed up with that.

First thing first, obviously I’m not a partygoer. I’m pretty introvert and awkward myself to keep up with such a lifestyle every single night. Second, I think I deserved one peaceful night after what I’ve been through all day. Try to control 3 men inside of you is not an easy job, you know, especially when you’re at your workplace.

Then I took a long nice shower and decided to watch whatever they served on TV. I remember I saw one music show and then puff! I was gone, switching to Jaebum all morning until this evening. Even to this day, I hardly control them for not randomly switching. Jaebum is one of my personality. He’s quite dependable actually. Sometimes I asked for his help to take care of the other two while I’m working. When The Others got bored in the middle of work hour, it will be hard to manage. They will yell and try to take charge of my body from inside. I will get a headache and sometimes get an anxiety attack. Either they success to get out or not, those situations really give me hard time.

“So, what have you been doing lately?” Dr. Choi asked another question.

“As usual… Wake up, do something until evening, sometimes I do chores, shop, or paint. Then go to work, after that I go home and then sleep, or if Jackson came out at will, for sure, we ended up at some club or bar after my shift.”

“I see. So, you still have trouble to tame him? Did he bring any problems to your body?” Dr. Choi sounded concern now. Yes, Jackson is also one of side of me. He never brought any problems so far, but it’s just a little bit difficult to control him. One day, Dr. Choi said to me that among The Others, Jackson considered being the strongest one. He can take my body as he liked and he’s one of my personality who can see everything under consciousness, and the other one is Jaebum. So, I should be strong to hold on to my conscious and tamed his wildness.

“Yes, I still find it hard to control him, and no, he’s fine so far.” I answered while shaking my head a little.

“Ok then. I want to talk to him actually. it’s been awhile. He didn’t show up to our counseling for the last couple weeks.” He smiled and sipped his cup of tea. I just nodded my head, noted to ask Jackson to come to the counseling later. “And how about Yugyeom? Last time he excitedly told me that he learned some dance moves recently.  I thought it’s good for him to do something positive.”

“Yeah, apparently BamBam took him to the dance studio a few weeks ago and he loves it. I thought it’s good for him too, he finally found something he likes. At least, he didn’t make any problem and turn into some punk teenager on his puberty.”

“I agree, he’s a sweet kid. I guess I shouldn’t be worried about Yugyeom, should I?” Dr. Choi asked for affirmation from me.

“Yes, he’s nice and still listens to my words. So, no worries.”

“Great!” Dr. Choi smiled as he nodded his head. “So… Is there something you want to share with me, Mark? Anything?”

I paused for a moment as my eyes looked up like I was remembering something. “Uumm… nope, I think we’re good. Nothing special or something specific is happening to us right now. Same old, same old.”

“Are you sure?”

“Postive.”

Dr. Choi still looked at me like waiting for some tea to spill. I think he just wanted to make sure everything’s alright. He then took a long sighed and said “Ok then, if you say so. Well… I see you on Sunday, Mark?”

“Sure.”

“Don’t forget to bring your pai