You kneeled, placed the flower bouquet you on the ground. On the gravestone of your husband. You traced it light with your hand, tracing your husband's smiling photo there. A smiled tugged on your lips. A happy flashbacks came to fill your mind.

Life has its own unique way. You couldn't remember the last time you were this peaceful ever since your husband passed away. But you thought it was okay. You were going to be okay. You had to move on with life. You were sure your husband would be sad if he saw you weeping on your room, trying to kill your self like before.

You felt a hand softly placed on your shoulder. You looked up to see a blond haired guy stood beside you. He didn't say anything, just stared at the gravestone. He kneeled beside you, placed another bouquet of flower on the other gravestone next to your husband. A nameless one. Your unborn's child's gravestone. You remembered to make a proper burial for it along with your husband, before fell into depression.

"You okay?" he asked, lightly rubbed your back.

"Yeah. Thanks, Jimin." You nodded.

Jimin smiled at you. Not the one where his eyes would be hidden that you loved, but he was still handsome nonetheless.

You grew close to him after the day you cried at the therapist's office. You would occasionally met Jimin at the therapist's office after your session even when he didn't need to go there anymore. The only place you two could spend your time without having to worry any of his fans around, and the therapist let the two of you sat on her backyard so you could talk more freely. Which you were glad she did. But she would winked at you or Jimin mischievously and Jimin would laughed nervously. You thought that was odd.

At first you would sat side by side in silent. But slowly you opened up to him. About your husband, the accident, everything. Sure, you'd cry. You told him you blamed your self. But Jimin would say nothing. He would let you speak until you choked a sob. That was when he would rub your back, or placed his hand around your shoulder, pulling your slightly to him so you could cry  on his shoulder or the crook of his neck. Sometimes, when you had a hard time to calm your self down, he'd hug you.

It was calming. A simple gesture you need. When you calmed down, he would talk to you, calming you even more. He would still apologized to you. He wished he could help you sooner. You couldn't blame him for not helping you back then. Really. You understood his reasons.

You two became closer. You even met all of the members, though some of them weren't intentional. The first you met was Yoongi, he was just done from his session with the therapist. He still remembered you. He bowed his head a little at you, would smile in acknowledgement whenever you two met. You didn't talk much, but you were sure he was a nice guy. You met the leader, Namjoon, when you were at the bookstore you worked at. He still remembered you, as Jimin, Yoongi and him were the ones who saw you jumped. He used a mask and hat to conceal his face, but when he saw you he opened the mask a little, showing him smiling with his dimples, simply asked if you were okay. You'd smiled back at him, muttering a thank you.

As for the rest of the members, you met them all at your parent's restaurant. Your family owned a restaurant and some celebrities would come and eat there, and you used to helped them there which made you didn't felt awkward around idols at all. They were all so noisy and lively. After months of crying and depressed, you laughed. You laughed at Hoseok's sudden scream cause Taehyung pranked him into watching a horror video, made Jin choked on his food and Namjoon dropped his bowl. You immediately close your mouth when seven of them stared at you. You were blushing, embarrassed.

But then you met Jimin's eyes. He smiled at you, the one where his eyes would disappear. He muttered "You finally laughed." silently. You nodded, still blushing.

And the rest were history.

You stared back at the gravestone. Inhaled. You played the wedding ring on your finger. You glanced at Jimin.

"Take your time, it's okay." Jimin nodded.

You closed your eyes. Exhaled.

"Hey, dear. It's been a while." You said to your husband's photograph.

"I'm sorry it took so long to visit you. When was it? 2 years ago?" You trailed off. "I couldn't accept the way you left that day. I couldn't bring myself to visit you. It would remind me of that day. I'm..still scared, even today." You felt Jimin's hand holding yours, squeezing it lightly.

"But, I think I'm okay now. No, it really is hard. I'm thinking of giving up everyday. I even thought of following you here. But you wouldn't want that. I know how selfless you are." You smiled. Your vision was getting blurry because of the tears pooled in your eyes.

"I need to move on." You muttered.

You held your tears as best as you could when you turned to the nameless gravestone.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you. I wish I could. I hope you'd forgive your mom." Your voice trembled. "Even I didn't get to know your gender when you had to go away. Forgive me."

You turned back to your husband's gravestone.

"Dear, please take care of our child. He's safe with you there. Thank you for filling my life with happiness. And...I'm sorry." You sobbed.

You turned to Jimin and he hugged you. He let you cry on the crook of his neck, ruining the black shirt he wore. He caressed your hair, trying to calm you down.

"It's okay, Y/N noona. You've done well. It's okay." He whispered.

"Sorry, Jimin. I ruined your shirt." You managed to choke another sentence.

Jimin laughed, you could feel his chest shook. He exhaled, kissing your forehead. "Noona, i told you it's okay. Why are you like this? Really." He smiled.

****

Weeks after accompanying you at the cemetery, Jimin confessed to you. You didn't answer him right then and there. You questioned your feelings a lot after his confessions. Did you love him? You did happy when you got to meet him, you did feel in peace when he was next to you when you were in your anxious state. You could sleep at night easily when you called him, hearing him singing you a lullaby.

Or was Jimin was just a rebound?

You shook your head. No, he wasn't. You still loved your husband, dearly. But you were ready to let him go. You realized no one would replaced his presence in your heart. Jimin understood that. He didn't really mind. He would jealous, but he didn't really mind. He knew you were still struggling. That was why he said he'd wait for your answer.

But you decided a month was more than enough for you to consider his confession. When you said yes to Jimin, he was smiling. Your favourite smile. He hugged you tightly, even lifted your petite figure with ease. You thought, this was it. You needed to move on. You deserved happiness too.

You moved out from your parent's house to an studio sized apartment. At the same floor as Jimin's dorm. He still lived with the rest of the members. It would be a problem for her to moved in to the dorm, though the boys didn't really mind as they needed someone aside from Jin who could cook for them. But you thought you'd pass and rent an apartment on your own. Jimin would slipped from his dorm to yours time to time. The boys wouldn't stop teasing him if he was caught when he came back in the morning to the dorm. They still did.

Just like today, Jimin slipped out from his dorm to yours in the middle of the night. He came back from his tour and he missed you badly.

You opened your eyes to see Jimin in front of you. He was snoring lightly. His hands were on your back, legs entangled with yours. You smiled. His sleeping face was so peaceful. You raised your hand to trace his cheek. Jimin stirred in his sleep, pulling you closer to him. He opened his eyes slightly.

"Go back to sleep." He murmured, closing his eyes back.

You nodded, kissing his lips. Jimin opened his eyes again.

"Noona, please don't rouse me for another round. I still want to sleep." He pouted.

You giggled this time. You settled in next to him, he pulled you closer. You closed your eyes, hummed in content as you could feel Jimin's breath on your head. A tear slipped from your eyes, you choked a sob without realizing it. You hurriedly wiped it before you woke Jimin again.

You finally find your happy song that you would sing, as Jimin really liked your voice.

 

 

****

You inhaled slowly. A bit nervous as Jimin watched you from behind your back. You stared at the fingerboard of the piano in front of you. It had been a while since you sang any song. Thinking today would be the best day, you dragged Jimin from his dorm to your apartment. Earning a knowing and mischievous smiles from the others. They would surely tease both of you later on. But you needed to concentrate on this one.

You brought the old piano back from your parent's house to your apartment since no one aside you really play it. You've been practicing the song for weeks ever since Jimin and the rest of his team were busy with their comebacks and concerts. Those time where all you could do was had video call or a voice call with him.

You glanced at Jimin who were still staring at your back. Felt your nervous getting worse each second he stared at you, Jimin smiled. Hoped it would lift some tension from you. It worked. A little bit.

You began to play the piano. Singing the song you've been wanting for Jimin to hear.

To have everlasting sorrows and open seams

But also you;

Everything before me seems to blur and dissolve

A floor of miracles wouldn't be enough

Because you called my name

Is it alright if I call your name?

You exhaled as you finished the outro of the song. You felt Jimin's hands wrapped around your waist from behind. He placed his head on your shoulder. A breathy laughed escaped his lips.

"Jagi, I told you. Your voice would sound better when you sing a happy song." He leaned closer to you.

"...yeah, you did." You nodded.

Jimin helped you stand. You both stood facing each other. You just realized even if his team members teased his height, he was actually pretty normal for guys. At least he was taller than you. Jimin smiled, opening his arms a sign for you to hug him. You walked to him, hugging him and he hugged you back. He exhaled in content.

"You know you're not alone, right? You have me, you have your family, you have my team mates." Jimin trailed off.

"So it's okay. It's okay to call me. Even if I'd be busy by tomorrow but call me anytime. Chat me anytime. I'd make sure to check it and call you back." He finished off.

You nodded. You were ready to cry when Jimin suddenly placed his lips on yours. A soft kiss. A kiss that would calm you down, but would still make you cry. You were pretty sure this kind of kiss was Jimin's specialty. Your PTSD had turned you into a crybaby mess.

"It's okay to cry. It's okay. Cause I'll be right here-" you cut him off with a kiss on his lips. A needy and long one. Both of you stopped when you could feel Jimin was running out of breath. His cheeks turned red, he was still a blushing mess.

"I love you, Park Jimin."

 

FIN