Dear Mark, 

If you are reading this then I am no longer here. When we ended things so long ago, I regretted everything. It was you who I've loved since the beginning of time, you that I have loved since forever. You stood by me through thick and thin, you've been there through the happiest and worst times of my life, and yet I was a coward to my own feelings. You gave more than anyone else...and you don't have too anymore.

I never got to say the words I should have said all this time. I love you. Thank you for being in my life.

Sincerely Yours, Jinyoung

They say the best stories always start in the middle. 

The middle where you barely understand what's already transpired, and what the future has yet to behold.

I can say my life is in such a transition, that even myself can't explain what's going on. 

Currently I'm falling, my hands swinging for life, and hell I think my is going to freeze to death with the fact that I have only boxers on right now. 

And all I remember is that I wrote a letter, to the dearest person I'd ever know...

That letter...I wonder if it'll ever send. Will he get it, and reply to my feelings, will he still feel the same?

Damn it, next time I'll wear pants when I sleep...

I miss you. 

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"Jinyoung!" This blanket is warmer then my damn apartment. Gosh the fabric is to die for. I can't bare to part such a—

"Park Jinyoung! Get your up before I smack the pretty off your face!" I was drenched in ice cold water the next minute. It's embarrassing to say that I screamed like a little girl...what can I say, Park Jinyoung don't like the cold. My body sprung up with shivers. "W-why!? A light tap would have worked! A verrrry light tap!" Maybe I was in a dream, but the person I saw before me was definitely my older sister, Seoyeon. She growled ready to whoop the out of me with a shoe, and I'm talking about a heeled shoe, at least 3 inches. "I-I'm sorry! I'm up, I'm going!" Was it just me, or did I sound like a 9 year old who would possibly never hit puberty until they were like twenty-five. I mean it happened to me, but...there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a late bloomer! Nothing!

I slid off the bed, literally struggling to reach the damn floor. Okay, this is definitely not okay. I slammed down hard on my buttocks and a loud groan escaped my lips. it up Jinyoung, it up, your is going to be okay, going to be just fine. I could feel the intense stare of my sister just ready to drag me across the floor. I wobbled my way up, walking to the door of the bathroom. 

I think I'm still asleep, because...I know I'm taller than Seoyeon now, but she looks like a ing giant on steroids, like damn. I shook my head, I need to focus, focus. Bathroom, where is the bathroom? "Jinyoung! What is up with you! Hurry the hell up so I can leave!" I sighed struggling again to open the doorknob to some room that I was praying to the lord all mighty was the bathroom. "...can't reach!" I pointed adorably with a pout. She sighed, opening the door and pushing me inside, throwing random clothes in as well before slamming the door and rushing down stairs to rant about being late. 

This seemed a little familiar, like I lived the experience once before. I sighed, huffing as I climb the stool. About damn time I had something to elevate my—

"What the !" I screamed at the top of my lungs, wheezing and breaking into tears. I started checking my body. Small feet, small hands,...

I lifted up my pants, and I started to spaz out. My ...my looks like a curled up shrimp. Where is my manhood?! I'm actually a kid, I'm seriously a nine year old me...

A knock on the door scared the living bats out of me. "Jinyoung, darling are you okay?" Mom, it was mom...oh how much I want to cry on your warm lap about this terrible dream, I mean this isn't real. It's not right? It couldn't be!?

But, she'd think I was crazy, I mean who would believe that a twenty-five year old was encased inside his nine-year-old self, like jack nob