Heechul opened his eyes to an unfamiliar room. Rubbing his eyes, he felt something weighing down on his lap. Staring at Siwan's peaceful sleeping face, memories of that afternoon's events came back to him like a flowing river. Looking down at his watch, noticing that it was already 3am. 

He placed a hand on Siwan's shoulder, lightly shaking him awake. 

 

"Siwan ah, wake up. It's already 3am, we should go sleep in a proper place." 

 

The elder moved around lazily, refusing to move from his comfortable position on Heechul's lap. 

 

"I'm sleepy... Just leave me be..." 

 

"Even so, you and I are gonna get a backache if you stay like this." 

 

Siwan groaned softly and against his will, he sat up, yawning.

 

"What time is it?" he mumbled,

 

"Three in the morning. I suggest we go back to sleep now since we still have school tomorrow." 

 

"Fine... I'll go to my room and sleep." 

Siwan stood up and made his way to his room. Looking back, he saw Heechul curling up into a ball on the couch.

 

"Aren't you coming?" 

 

Heechul looked at the elder. 

 

"Can I?" 

 

Siwan sighed and walked up to him, grabbing his wrist gently and pulling him towards the room. He carefully sat the younger down in the bed. 

 

"Where are you gonna sleep then?" Heechul asked. 

 

Siwan raised his eyebrow slightly. 

 

"Beside you, of course." 

 

Heechul blushed slightly. He felt the mattress sink beside him and a warm back pressing against his. He in a sharp breath, calming down his nervous heart. It had been so long since he shared a bed with anybody. 

 

Suddenly, he felt a long, skinny arm wrap around his neck, pulling him closer to its warm body. They stayed there for a few moments, hearts beating rapidly in tune  with each other. 

 

Leaning forward, Siwan pressed his lips against the back of Heechul's neck, resting his forehead on the spot. Heechul felt a rush of adrenaline coursing through his veins. The small peck, full of doubt, restlessness and nervousness, but also fondness, hope and an overflowing amount of trust. He turned around to face the embarrassed boy, feeling the heat radiating off his red cheeks. The elder looked up at him with the same beautiful eyes, glowing with hope and.... Something else.... Something that he could not name.... 

 

An expansive feeling bloomed in his chest. As of by instinct, he drew the elder closer and pressed a tentative kiss on the soft skin of his forehead, feeling him relax in his arms. 

 

As a thousand unsaid words came pouring out of that kiss, the elder leaned closer, their breaths mingling, faces merely a centimetre apart. The burden of uncertainty was immediately lifted off his chest as he felt Siwan's soft lips against his own, pressing against them with a loving force. Heechul deepened the kiss, a desire to give his everything to the smaller boy kept his heart beating at an inhuman pace. 

 

They didn't use their tongues, a clear sign of their inexperience regarding intimate physical contact. Heechul could feel the slight tremble of the elder's body as his warm hand rested on his cheek, pulling him closer. 

 

Slowly removing his lips from the younger's, Siwan looked at him with the most loving gaze he had ever been viewed with. All their imperfections and flaws seemed to disappear in the depth of the kiss. 

 

"Im Woong Jae" 

 

Heechul looked at the elder with curious eyes. 

 

"What did you say?" 

 

Siwan stared back at him, his eyes burning with seriousness. 

 

"You asked me for my name back then. My real name, is Im Woong Jae." 

 

Heechul stared at him with eyes a mixture of different emotions. 

 

"Sorry I lied.... Will you forgive me?" 

 

Heechul stayed silent. After a long, painful pause, he finally asked, "Why Siwan?" 

 

The elder smiled. 

 

"I've always loved swans. They look so graceful... So free... And so imperfect. Calling myself Siwan is a way of making myself feel better, I guess. Woong Jae was my real name which I used until my dad left. Ever since then, Im Siwan was born." 

 

Heechul touched the side of his porcelain face, now slightly wet with a thin streak of tears falling down it. 

 

"You're always gonna be Siwan to me. Not the Siwan who got tortured, but the Siwan who opened his heart up to me... who trusted me.... who I want to protect..... who I want to spend this whole night kissing..." 

Another long pause hung in the air. At that moment, Heechul finally understood what had glowed in Siwan's eyes since day one. The glow that had attracted him like a firefly to a lamp. It was love. 

 

"......and who I love."