The tears that dropped from her face did more than ripple through his entire being. A wave crashed over and swallowed him whole. He was drowning and no matter how much he struggled, he didn’t know how to reach the surface.

 

He had always had good morals, been a person with strength of character.

And so he thought no harm would be done. But when had hanging out with his friends stop being fun? When had being unafraid mean doing dumb things to look cool? When did teasing become bullying?

 

The same hands that he swore he would use to protect and guide had now become weapons to tear others down. This was not who he was. This wasn’t who he wanted to be. He had never been or wanted to be the type of son who made his mother cry. Yet here he was.

 

When did he forget who he was?

 

He heart constricted. Bobby felt like someone had tore his heart out of his chest and lit it on fire. He was overwhelmed with guilt and sorrow. He didn’t know what to say or do to make it better. So he ran. Bobby ran until his legs wobbled trying to keep him upright, until his ribs burned with every heave of his chest constricting around his lungs and his heart -- his heart that was bleeding and broken. He wanted to scream and cry. Maybe someone would hear him. Maybe someone could help him find out where things went wrong.

 

“Bobby?”

 

His head whipped around at the sound of his name and a familiar voice -- one filled with memories of endless laughter, warm hugs, and easy comfort.

 

“Hanbin,” his voice cracked. And suddenly, the marks of his inner turmoil rolled down his cheeks. Bobby mind flooded with the memories of what used to be, before he had gone and ed everything up. For even if they were heated rivals now, there was a time when the other boy had been his biggest support. He had left everything he had loved behind for useless street cred and fake friends.

 

“What are you doing here?”

 

Bobby looked around and was hit by a fresh wave of yearning. They were at the river. It was where they always ended up before, when they were still young, reckless, and naive kids who dreamed of touching the stars. Back when they were best friends, ones who were edging towards something closer and more intimate. And he yearned and wanted so hard in that moment for things to be how they used to be, to be easier and better.

 

"I’ve lost my way, please hold my hand. I don’t know why I’m here. I wanna runaway.”

 

Hanbin stared back at him with those deep, black eyes that seemed to peer into his soul. Time seemed to freeze and Bobby’s breath stopped. It felt like he was being scanned to see if he was still worth it, still worth the effort. All the good and the bad was being unraveled by the person that mattered most to him.

 

Still, the earth turned and world around them went on. Cars drove past, with their honking and bright lights, and people walked by chattering about everything and nothing. No one cared about them. And if Hanbin walked away too, there would be no one who would care about him.

 

But Hanbin took a step towards him. Bobby stood still with bated breath, waiting for the other to turn around and leave him behind. He didn’t.

 

When they were toe to toe, Hanbin softly grasped his hand and leaned in his head until their foreheads were touching. And he whispered just for Bobby, “Even if you’re heart is broken and malfunctioned, I’ll run for you in your place.”

 

And Jiwon breathed.