“Oh baby tell me why 

The look you give me makes me feel so small 

I’m not good-looking, I don’t have much 

But can’t a guy like me live? 

Somebody somebody 

Somebody anybody love me 

Somebody somebody 

Somebody anybody” 

Love Me - iKON

“Hey, this is your best one yet!” Hanbin grinned, turning around to knock Junhoe on the shoulder, who retaliated with a headlock. Hanbin laughed and slapped the younger’s hands away. But of course being the workaholic he was, Hanbin couldn’t allow any imperfections and the moment was ruined.

“Just this one tiny part...it would sound better like this! And here, you see...” Hanbin trailed off as he dragged his crimson pen of terror across the paper. Soon enough, red bled through the whole paper. It looked like a murder scene if Junhoe was to be honest.

Sighing, he let his arms go limp around the other boy and dragged them off. Once again, his love letter was reduced to nothing.

“Hey, don’t look so down! Your work has really improved okay?” Hanbin gave a tiny smile and patted him on the shoulder.

Coming from the boy, it was a really big compliment. But Junhoe didn’t have the heart to return the smile so he just shrugged. He didn’t know how much longer he could go having his feelings ignored. After all, Junhoe was anything but passive, especially when it came to the things he loved.

But for tonight, seeing Hanbin happily scribble and babble about how they could really make this work into a song, Junhoe coudn’t do anything but concede. The older boy was really just too cute for words.

…

Junhoe’s phone pinged obnoxiously. He groaned and slapped his arm around hoping to turn the offensive thing off. Who dared to wake him up during his beauty sleep? He was going to shove hot bars down that member’s throat and sing at them until their ears fell off.

Upon opening his phone, all his murderous feelings were replaced with a fuzzy warmth that swelled his heart.

If you’re just a dream 

I’d say you’re a beautiful yet sad dream 

Why, with that sweet voice 

You tell me you are my best friend 

Sometimes, I’m good with being 

Just someone to lean on 

I’m an island that is lost 

You are my best friend 

Best Friend - iKON

Even if he knew it wasn’t about him; Junhoe could only hope. After all, he was the only one Hanbin was sending these beautiful poems too. He was the one that Hanbin could open his heart up to; drunk or not. But that was a story for another time.

His phone pinged again. His smiled, thinking it was a follow up text from Hanbin. But it quickly turned lopsided when he saw that it was Bobby-hyung. Not that the boy had anything against the older, but he was just hoping that it was from the man of his affections. Plus, he could already hear the smirk on Bobby’s face.

Bobby-hyung: 

>>i see hanbin still hasnt realized that you loOOOove

     him kkkkk

>> he showed us your latest stuff. It was pretty good;

      even he had lotsa good things to say

>>dats progress, i guess

>>hey! dont ignore me!!

>>junhoe-ya!!

>>junhoe!!

>>fjaklfj

>>hff

>>y dont u confess to him for real??

Me: 

>>how

Bobby-hyung: 

>>oh, so NOW u reply

>>just tell him straight up “i like u”

>>or show him thru ur actions!

   Im sure the other boys will help

Junhoe didn’t reply, knowing he didn’t need to. He really was sick of being the reliable best friend. Junhoe wanted more. He wanted to be the person that Hanbin wrote all those beautiful lyrics about. With this resolve, he went back to sleep. A boy needs his beauty sleep after all.  

His plan was not working like how he thought it would. Actually, he thinks it had the opposite effect. Hanbin kept sending him weird looks when he thought Junhoe wasn’t looking but jokes on him, because Junhoe was always looking.

On long nights, Junhoe would stop by with hot chocolate and hot packs to keep the other boy warm. Lord knows that he’d like to do it by cuddling with the other, but once Hanbin started working it was impossible to catch his attention. Instead, Junhoe just left the gifts along with little post-it notes.

“Cheer up, hyung! There is not life without hardship. This too, will pass.”

“To me, you’re cooler than Michael Jackson-sunbaenim.”

“They say the darkness can be beaten with a single candle. You are that candle that shines so brightly and leads the way for the rest of us. Kim Hanbin, you are the best leader!”

“I would give up hot bars, if that meant you would laugh forever.”

“What’s Bruce Lee’s favorite drink? WA-TAAAA. Get it?? Because wa-taa = water??? Kekeke. Please remember to drink water and take care of yourself, hyung!”

Alright, that one was his personal favorite. But despite all he did, Hanbin made no move to even acknowledge his efforts. In fact, it seemed a little like he was being avoided. Whenever they were in the same room, the atmosphere was almost as awkward and him and Bobby. Whenever their hands accidentally touched, Hanbin pulled his away so fast and made up a poor excuse to get away. Junhoe was tired of it.

At lunch the other day, Chanwoo was teasing Jinhwan-hyung and made everyone laugh. In that moment, Junhoe had met eyes with Hanbin and for a second it was like the world was a little brighter. He smiled with all his teeth and and shined his brightest eye smile, but Hanbin ducked his head and broke their eye contact.

Not gonna lie, that hurt a bit.

Hanbin’s POV

Hanbin didn’t know what to do with himself. Something was wrong with his heart and his stomach, and actually his whole body. Funny thing was, it was only around Junhoe.

You’re falling in love, his heart and brain told him. But that couldn’t be true because one, Junhoe was his band member, and two Junhoe would never feel the same. He was Kim Hanbin, single for 22 years. Why would it change now?

But everytime he found another silly note, his heart bubbled with hope. Maybe he wasn’t reading the signs wrong. Unknowningly, his internal back and forth was also showing through his actions. It wasn’t until Bobby approached him that he realized he was even giving Junhoe the cold shoulder. He hadn’t been meaning to.

Hanbin just got really stuck in his thoughts sometimes. Plus, Junhoe kicking his heart into overdrive was not helping at all!! But avoiding the other boy was definitely not the right option. He really missed their easy banter.

And so, he metaphorically squared his shoulders and decided that he would fix the awkwardness that he started. God, it was worst than the one between Junhoe and Bobby if even Bobby had noticed how he was acting.

His unsaid peace offering? A bouquet of hot bars. He was rewarded with a blinding smile and what he thought was going to be a one-armed hug but actually turned out to be a chokehold.

And this time, he knew he couldn’t breathe because the other boy was literally choking him. But he coudn’t deny that it might’ve also been because his heart was swelling up too much and taking over his body. Details, whatever.

As the air became colder and the days became shorter, the distance between the two boys began to close. That easy familiarity was back and even stronger than before. They’d still fight over dumb things, but even then they could both say they were having fun. In fact, both boys would go out of their way to pick a fight just to make their playful back and forth continue.

Hanbin began seeking out Junhoe’s prescence whenever he could. Somehow, he had managed to convince the other boy to start keeping him company in the studio. Even without talking, the boys settled into a comfortable zone just for the two of them. Their hearts beat in tandem and their breaths eased into the air in sync. Occasionally, soft hums would lilt into the space, but nothing broke them out of the trance they seemed to slip into. Even when they wanted to share something to each other, a quick, soft shoulder bump did the trick.

Since Junhoe started joining Hanbin in the studio, he had taken to heading back to the dorms earlier because he didn’t want to keep Junhoe up to late. It was hyprocritical but it seemed to work in both their favors. On the walks back, the silence from the studio quickly slipped away as they chattered about this and that, nothing and everything. They laughed as they shared stories of fans they received messages from online, of the members doing something silly, and of any movies that they recently got into.

Yet still, they seemed to be in their own bubble. Anyone who looked at the two could tell they were attached at the hip and cared deeply for each other. Junhoe’s taller frame would be bent so that he could hear Hanbin’s soft voice over the noise of the streets. In turn, Hanbin would keep a hand on Junhoe’s back, right under his hood (it’s one of the warmest places on the body, Hanbin pouted when Junhoe had questioned about that one spot), to help steer the taller through the crowds.

Tonight was like any other night. Perhaps the only difference, was the biting cold of winter nipping at their ears and noses. With a quick peek at Junhoe’s side profile, Hanbin held his breath and stuck his hand into Junhoe’s pocket and intertwined their fingers. He had his excuse held at the tip of his tongue, ready when the younger paused in his retelling of how Chanwoo and Donghyuk had tricked Yunhyeong into eating a mayonnaise filled doughnut.

But instead the other boy just smiled his way and drew Hanbin closer, as if he already knew that Hanbin would just say it was to keep warm. Junhoe continued his story. And the breath Hanbin was holding puffed into the air as he squeezed the other’s hand and buried his cheeks into his jacket. His ears were no longer cold, despite the cherry red they glew.

As they were shuffling back to the dorm, it started to snow. The boys paid no mind, until they white flurry started to come down faster and they broke into a jog. It was a little hard to run with their hands still attached but they managed.

Right before they burst through the doors of their building, Junhoe pulled Hanbin back with their connected hands.

“Hyung.” He stared directly at Hanbin, who got unnerved and tried to pull away. But Junhoe held on tight.

Illuminated by the street lights and the soft white of the falling snow, Junhoe pronounced clearly and seriously,

“You are like the soft snow that settled over me in the night.

You settled inside my heart, only to melt away and leave a new warmth and brightness.  

I only hope that I can bloom inside your heart as well.”

Then he let go of Hanbin’s hand to give him a chance to reply. Junhoe would never force him into his feelings.

Except all he got was a “Wow! I really felt that one. You sure know your way with words. Welp it’s late, goodnight I’ll see you tomorrow,” and a couple pats on the back from a boy who he could tell was burning up from embarrassment. Without once looking up at Junhoe’s face, Hanbin quickly turned and made his way to the door.

“Are you kidding me?” Junhoe exclaimed, exasperated. He put his longer legs to use and caught up with Hanbin and pulled him back by his hoodie. He turned the other around and peeked his head down so he could look the other straight in the eye.

“Listen. I like you, and that’s not a poem. Understand?”

With a squeak, Hanbin squeezed his eyes shut and nodded. With that Junhoe, leaned his face closer to the other boy and then shoved snow down his back. He let go of the older and ran off cackling, only looking back when he heard an enraged shout coming from a bright red face.

EXTRA SCENE

The boys were peacefully cuddling in unrestrained comfort and quiet until Junhoe’s unmistakeable laughter electrified the air.

“What?” Hanbin turned, smacking the other boy to get him to shut his loud mouth.

“I just…” Junhoe continued cackling…”I can’t believe you edited my love poem...Is this Playful Kiss?”

“Shut up!” Hanbin’s ears burned velvet and he kicked the other boy off his bed. “Stop laughing! How was I supposed to know?!”

“It’s just….so like you!!” He didn’t think it was possible, but Junhoe laughed even harder. Tears lined his eyes and he curled into a ball as his stomach shook with uncontrollable laughter.

“Hey!!” Hanbin yelled as he threw himself on top of the other boy, who let out a little grunt as the air was forced out of him. Still, his body shook with mirth and so Hanbin did the only thing he knew would shut the other boy up. He sealed their lips together.