Jungkook's POV Where is my angel? Hopping excitedly, I headed straight to where I know Chaeyoung was. She had been trying to keep herself busy when I told her not to think about anything. I understand that she may be bored but I was a little worried she'd be too exhausted. She never realized but I noticed how she kept on waking up at midnight, silent tears streaming down her eyes. She was having a breakdown and everytime I was about to come close to her, I'd stop as I listen to her mumbling series of apologies. I woke up one time when I heard her sniffling and just as I was able to move, she turned around and pretended to be asleep. My first instinct told me to move forward, hug her and tell her everything is fine. But then I know it isn't. Even after countless of times I tell her that it's not her fault, I still understand why she still feels like it is. I am not even sure if she had already mourn over the passing of her friend, all the more reason why I decided to let her reflect on her own, cry her eyes out and have a little time for herself whenever she was having that breakdown. A huge smile escaped my lips as I reach the door where Chaeyoung is, but before I was able to show myself, I was startled when I heard her voice. "I'm feeling stuffed," she whispered. Her voice was low but the sound was full enough it resonated until to where I was located. I decided to lean behind the wall where they won't see me yet I would still be able to hear what they were talking about. It's creepy, I know but I was curious. Chaeyoung rarely let out her emotions lately. The two were silent for a moment and I lifted my head and gaze upward, my eyes landing on the huge space in front of me, my hands hidden on the sides of my pants. "Chaeyoung, are you okay?" I heard Hyeri noona asked but she did not respond. Suddenly, I felt my chest beating like crazy. My heart started pumping out of my chest. "Park Chaeyoung!" Hyeri noona repeatedly called but she didn't answer. I was about to show myself when I heard her whimper. "I have been calling your name but you were so pre-occupied," Hyeri noona told her. "Have you told Jungkook about it?" My brows furrowed. Tell me what? "Of what?" she asked and based on the tone of her voice, she was unsure herself. "This," Hyeri noona stated like everything was actually so obvious. "That you're feeling this way about your relationship. That you're slowly losing yourself the more he tries to break through your walls," My body froze at Hyeri noona's words. What does she mean? Did I do something wrong? I started feeling nervous. "No," she whispered, her voice unsure as if her mind was off from reality. . "I never saw it like this." "I think you and Jungkook need to talk," Hyeri noona muttered. "I haven't fully healed," she mumbled, but why do I feel like she's telling it more to herself. "I love him." and my hands balled into fist. Why does it seem like her love for me is now making her cry? "I felt different with Jungkook, I felt butterflies and rainbows." A weird laugh escaped . "The mere sound of his voice would make me go weak. And the way he cares for me, the way he thinks of my well-being first before him, those simple things he does makes my heart flutter." Her words are beautiful but why is it so painful to hear those words now? "I love him so much I'm afraid to tell him how I feel apart from what I feel for him. I'm afraid to tell him that I'm not okay, that I'm still not fine even after all the efforts that he made." "Don't cry baby," I whispered to myself. My heart feels like it's gonna burst. I can't bear to hear her hurting like this. "I cannot tell him straight to his face that no matter how comforting his words are, the guilt I feel inside still lingers like gum stuck in here." My eyes closed, my body started shaking. "It's ing painful that all I do is rely on his touch, rely on his love to me so I can escape the reality I've been trying to hide with even before I hop on this bus." ", ." I don't even know what to think anymore. She's hurting this much and I don't even realize. "I'm afraid to disappoint him," "Chaeyoung-ah," Hyeri noona calls for her and how I wish it was me calming her down. "I'm afraid to lose him." I can't stand this. The pain on her voice is tearing my heart apart. She needs to know that no matter what happens, I won't ever give her up. Never. Without even thinking, I went out of my hiding and made my presence known. "Who gave you that ty idea that you're going to lose me? Chaeyoung, what are you even saying? Did I do something wrong?" Confused and lost, that's how I am right now. I feel like everything is breaking apart in front of me. "No," she mumbled, her voice was so weak and it's scaring me. My eyes widened when I noticed her body started shaking a little, then Hyeri noona pulled her for a hug. "Jungkook, I don't think it's a good idea for you to be here right now. You still have a rehearsal to finish," Hyeri noona stated and I can very well recognize the authority on her voice. "But I need to let her know that I'm just here, and I'm not going anywhere," I'm desperate, so desperate that I am willing to risk getting in trouble for not listening to my manager's words. Chaeyoung... As if having a mind of it's own, I slowly moved towards her only to be pulled back. "Jungkook!" My eyes turned towards my right and I saw Jin hyung pulling me by the arm. I swear to God if he isn't older I would have flip him over. But I have so much respect to my hyungs that even on the verge of breaking down, I can't do that. "Listen to Hyeri noona. Give Chaeyoung a space for a moment. I'm sure Hyeri noona will take care of her," he stated and my eyes met Chaeyoung's. I wanted to walk closer to her, pull her for a hug and kiss her like how I usually do. I wanted to tell her I love her, that no matter what happen I will stay with her, for whatever bull that comes our way. But I know I need to back away for a moment, no matter how match it kills me. Because right now, I seemed to be doing a very poor job in showing her my love. So I did. I slowly moved backwards, away from her. My mind was too focused on Chaeyoung that three hours had already passed, yet all I did was mess everything up. One.... Two... Three.... I've made a lot of mistakes on our choreographies that even I had lost count how many. I almost ruined a whole ing performance because my mind was too disorganized. From the corner of my eyes, I can feel the worried glances my members are giving me, and I feel so ashamed. I am disappointing them, along with the thousands of fans who took their time to be with us. And I know they don't deserve this. Chaeyoung, as always, would be watching along the crowd but I didn't dare try to check where she is, afraid of the possibility of breaking down in front of these people if we ever lock eyes. "I'm sorry, I made a lot of mistakes today I know you guus were disappointed," by this time, fresh tears are now falling down my eyes as I do my speech to our fans. My heart ached at the sound of our fans crying along with me, telling me that it's fine and that I can do better next time. My members encouraged me to continue and I felt so bad about messing up. I have never felt so glad to receive so much love. After a few moments, the concert had already ended and now we're already checked in on a hotel. The sound of the knocking on the door caught our attention but I didn't dare to move. I know it's Chaeyoung. Even after what happened earlier, she would find me. She's selfless like that. "Can I see him?" My head hung low at the sound of her voice, my knees started to shake I had to take a grip on them to calm myself down. "What happened?" Jimin hyung asked and my eyes met the worried glances of my member, my right hand grabbing a bottle of booze taking a swig along the process. After a few minutes, Jin hyung sat in front of me, my arms now resting on my knees for support. W