Jiyong doesn’t regret it.

In the four years he’s been in YG, everyday is a chance to work on improving, and everyday he’s continuously discovering new things about himself that he never thought he was capable of even doing.

Everyday, Yang Hyunsuk gives him tasks to do–from singing and rapping, to dancing, and songwriting. There is never not a busy day for Kwon Jiyong.

When he’s lying on the practice room floors, exhausted to the point of passing out after an intensive dance routine, his foggy mind conjures up visions of him on stage, out of breath like he was now, the spotlight hot and bright shining on him, and the crowd would be cheering and shouting his name. It’s enough to keep him going everyday, enough to fill his notebook with lyrics that he hopes people would sing along to one day.

For four years, Jiyong was so sure about his dream to be an idol, each difficult day of training a step closer to seeing his name in lights.

So he couldn’t really blame YG’s grim expression when he approached the man about quitting.

And even then, Jiyong doesn't regret it–even when he was standing there in front of Hyunsuk, the man’s eyes almost boring into his own, lips cast in a deep frown.

“What changed?” Hyunsuk had asked.

Jiyong had shrugged, but anyone in the room could see the nervous shake of his hands, the glimmer in eyes when asked about his passion for music. And he’s still passionate–hell, it’s become his everyday life. It’s just that he wanted to focus his energy on something different.

He pinpoints one particular evening when he mistakened the recording studio for one of the practice rooms the company provided for trainees, too exhausted to noticed he dozed off and miscalculated his steps. When he opened the door, he found himself meeting eyes with a tired looking Teddy Park, nothing but the light from his computer illuminating him and the tiny cramped studio.

“You lost, kid?”

Jiyong was suddenly shaken awake from his stupor, hands pressed at his sides as he gives a deep bow at the older. For Jiyong, Teddy has been an inspiration since he was little, 1TYM being the group that made him want to pursue singing in the first place.

Jiyong was sad to see them go so soon–having gone on an indefinite hiatus a few years ago with the members all doing their own thing. Teddy for one has become an inhouse producer for YG. Even during his group promotions with 1TYM, his talent for composing was well-known in the industry, and is also the precursor for Jiyong’s admiration for the older.

Jiyong has been interested in record producing for a while now. His lyrics have been praised by Hyunsuk on occasion due to their flare, but he’s never tried his hand on actually working on a track himself. All the songs he’s made so far are only a product of his lyrics and his voice. He knows he has a long way to go to match up with Teddy Park.

The boy thinks its fate–having stumbled upon his inspiration at work like this, in his quaint little studio. So Jiyong steels himself–takes a nervous deep breath as he musters up the courage to ask if he could possibly watch the man while he works.

He almost thought he was dreaming when Teddy looked at him then and gave an easy shrug of his shoulders, pulling in another chair beside him for Jiyong to sit in. Jiyong still thinks he’s dreaming after it.

That night, Jiyong learned so many new things on top of all his years of training. He can’t believe he took this long to reach out to Teddy. The older was kind enough to be hands on with him, let him try things out for himself to get him started. And here Jiyong thought he’d be spending the entire time just staring in awe as Teddy works his magic on his computer.

That night, Jiyong could barely sleep.

That whole week, his mind was constantly spinning. Being an idol–he was so sure of it until this point, but having visited Teddy that night, and the other succeeding nights to come stirred something in him that just pushed at him to walk into YG’s office and quit.

Jiyong doesn't regret it at all. Jiyong enjoys his time in the studio, with Teddy personal mentoring him through it all. And truth be told, even if he spends his days at the recording studio instead of the practice room, nothing's changed. Everyday he’s still learning, still training and continually trying to improve himself like he’s always been.

Nothing’s changed.

He still passes by the practice rooms when he has the time and greets the other trainees. He’s made a few friends here and there, trainees that have come in YG to audition for the same dream, and trainees that have left YG because they could handle the pressure.

And Jiyong can understand–it wasn’t easy entering the company in the first place, training everyday is practically hell on earth, but he also knows that the blood, and the tears, and sweat would all worth it in the end.

“Oh look, it’s the traitor.” Youngbae had snorted at him when Jiyong passed by where he was practicing. Jiyong just grinned at his best friend and went in for a hug.

Dong Youngbae started his training at the same time as Jiyong. They shared the same dream, the same goal, and they promised each other that they’d debut together no matter what.

That was until Jiyong sat him down one evening about him wanting to become a producer instead.

“I said I was sorry, okay?” Jiyong had grumbled. “We’re still a packaged deal though, I won’t let Hyunsuk-hyung debut you without me tagging along.” The younger grinned. “I’ll write all your songs for you.”

Youngbae just rolled his eyes, but Jiyong didn’t miss the tiny smile on his face. “Whatever.”

--

Jiyong is surprised to see Teddy exiting his studio right as Jiyong arrived. When the older gives him a nod and gestures for him to follow him somewhere, he’s quick to match his pace and walk with him.

“No session today?” Jiyong asks.

Teddy gives an affirmative hum, and as they make a turn, Jiyong quickly notes that they were heading to the practice rooms. He’s heard from Youngbae that there was a second elimination today for the hiphop idol group Hyunsuk was going to debut in September.

When they entered the room, it was already crowded with staff. Jiyong recognizes the other trainees coming to watch, as well as the other senior producers that he’s come to befriend. There was also a camera crew in the room documenting the whole ordeal.

In the middle of the room are two hopeful boys standing in front of Hyunsuk. Jiyong recognizes one of them as Jang Hyunseung, having had dance practices with him a couple times in the past. He’s panting and sweating, looks like he just finished his performance. Jiyong wished he wasn’t so late in getting here.

When the other boy turns his head into Jiyong’s general direction as they entered, he’s surprised to see the youngest trainee in YG, Lee Seunghyun, all dressed up in baggy clothes, seemingly ready to give the performance of a lifetime.

The older had heard odd rumors about the kid, stemming from his memorable appearance on Battle Shinhwa. Jiyong remembers getting angry at the thought of having such a lazy person joining his team for debut, and no one could really blame Jiyong for being bewildered at the sight of the same kid crossing paths with him in the halls one morning.

He’s heard the kid’s not all that bad–being so young at the company the staff are especially fond of him and take care of him. Jiyong has heard he stayed up to practice for tonight’s elimination after all the trainees have left. Jiyong can respect such persistence and dedication, but he hasn’t really heard enough of Seunghyun’s voice to judge quite yet.

“Before I start I have something I want to say to you.” Seunghyun lets out a nervous breath as he meets Hyunsuk’s amused stare.

“What is it?” The older humors him, lifting a brow at him. Jiyong can’t help but sit up straighter in his seat, interested in what the younger has to say too.

“I thought of five reasons why I should be in the group.”

“Five reasons? Go ahead.”

“First reason is, don't I match the maknae image the most?”

Hyunsuk quirks a small smirk. “And?”

“The second reason is my dancing. Since I know a lot about it and have done a lot of performing and dancing, I think I can help the team a lot in those areas.” Seunghyun at his lips nervously as Hyunsuk nods for him to go on, odd smile on his face still intact.

“Third is the concept. If the hyungs get fans because they are strong, cool, and manly, I'm sure I can get fans with my cute, smooth, and witty self.” The younger breaks into a small smile at the encouraging laughter from the staff. Jiyong cracks a grin himself.

“Fourth is my confidence. I can give a good show with my unwavering confidence wherever we go.

“And fifth is…” Seunghyun exhales out a shaky breath. “There's no fifth reason. If you give me one more chance, I'll work so hard that you won't regret choosing me. I'll surprise everyone with my hidden talent and confidence. If you'll watch, I'll try really hard.” Seunghyun ends his speech with a bow, hands tightly clasped together. Jiyong notices the way they shake.

“We’ll see.” Hyunsuk hums, resting his chin on the heel of his palm.

Jiyong didn’t know what he was expecting, but it wasn’t this.

The boy had cited dancing as his strong point, so that’s what Jiyong had assumed he’d prepared to perform today, but the melodic guitar intro of Tashannie’s Haru Haru completely throws Jiyong off guard.

Nothing else mattered when Lee Seunghyun started singing.

Jiyong couldn’t look away.

He probably looks stupid, with his mouth wide open like he had now, but he didn’t even care at the moment, as Seunghyun’s dreamlike voice filled the quiet room.

The emotion was clear in the desperate way he was singing, it’s a desperation Jiyong and the other trainees in the room would understand completely. It’s an ache they’re very familiar with. One look at the people in the room, anyone could see how much they’re affected and awed by Seunghyun’s solemn and honest performance.

Everyone’s clapping before Jiyong’s snapped back to reality, his eyes never leaving Seunghyun as the boy bows, anxiously holding his hands up to his heart. He furrows his brows  when the boy couldn’t stop shaking, tears staining his cheeks as Hyunsuk announces that they’re both still not fit to be part of the group.

“Seunghyun-ah,” Hyunsuk calls out, gesturing for the boy to step forward.

Jiyong’s heart aches as he watches the boy nod frantically, his sobs making it difficult for him to utter a proper reply.

“I think this is the best little Seunghyun has ever sung, don’t you think?”

“T-Thank you.” The younger tries to say in between his hiccups.

“That’s why I have a proposition for you.” Hyunsuk smiles, understanding, almost scaringly fatherly.

“What are your thoughts on debuting as a solo?”

Everyone in the room starts cheering and yelling when all little Seunghyun could do was dive in straight and give the CEO a big hug. Even Hyunsuk was holding on to him, laughing and scolding him teasingly as he lets the boy crying on his shoulder.

Jiyong himself finds himself standing, clapping and smiling to himself. He doesn’t know why he feels almost giddy with excited, it’s not even his debut. All he knows for sure is that Seunghyun deserves it.

That night Jiyong could hardly catch a wink of sleep. His mind was racing, fingers twitching to write, little Seunghyun’s voice filling his thoughts and his notebook.

--

“Oh, s-sorry–I didn’t know anyone was here–”

Jiyong looks up from his phone to see little Seunghyun dithering by the door of the practice room, not knowing if he should go in or not. He was in a simple t-shirt and jogging pants, a pink beanie over his head in a lazy attempt to tame his unruly hair. He’s holding a small lunch box in one hand and a hand towel in another. He’s cute.

Jiyong smiles at him. “It’s fine. I was looking for you actually.”

Seunghyun’s eyes widen. “Really?”

“Really.” Jiyong gesture for him to sit where he was by the speakers, biting off his fond smile as he watches the boy gingerly close the door and take careful steps inside. “Come here, Seunghyun-ah. Can I call you that?”

“I-It’s fine,” Little Seunghyun is quick to assure, holding his hands up to wave it off. “It’s fine, hyung.”

“I don’t actually think we’ve ever spoken properly before.” Jiyong hums, tilting his head and smiling playfully at a tense looking Seunghyun sitting cross legged in front of him. “Am I intimidating?”

When the boy gives a timid nod, looking up at Jiyong nervously behind his lashes to see his reaction. Jiyong couldn’t help but laugh, heart ringing in his ears as he fights the urge to reach out and pat his chubby cheek lovingly.

“I see you sometimes in the halls though, just–not sure how to start a conversation, I guess.” Seunghyun mumbles, shrugging his shoulder in what should have been a nonchalant manner, but his red ears easily give way to know how nervous he actually was.

Little Seunghyun is easy to talk to the older finds out. He’s timid at first, but he’s no less witty and sarcastic with his replies. Jiyong’s endeared, even though he’s the target of his disses. Seunghyun was opening up to him regardless, and he’ll consider it a win in his book.

They keep the playful banter up until Jiyong notices the boy’s tense frame ease as they talk. It makes Jiyong release the breath he didn’t know he was holding til now.

Jiyong learns all about his hometown, how infamous he was back in Gwangju because everyone admired how he danced so fluidly. He learns how much they actually got in common, from annoying siblings, to the dramas they stay up late at night to watch.

And Jiyong already knows how lovely Seunghyun’s singing voice is, but god, his laugh–his laugh is endearing. The way he tried to hide his giggles with the back of his hand at first, shy, and then when he got comfortable and just started laughing so loudly, sounding so young and boyish.

Today he’s learning so much about Lee Seunghyun, but his little laugh is Jiyong’s favorite.

“It’s beautiful, hyung.” Seunghyun says in awe as Jiyong plays a sample of the song he was working on that week. He smiles at the way the younger closes his eyes as soon as the melodic piano echoes from the speakers.

Teddy had tasked him to produced at least one track per week, see how he improves in his mixing and see what else he could improve for the following week to come. Jiyong named this particular track Next Day, a song he quickly penned the night of little Seunghyun’s performance at the second elimination.

So far, the older has recorded the intro, but he stopped just before the first verse rolls in, maybe hoping to get Seunghyun to sing the song for him.

“You think so?” Jiyong chuckles, eyes fond as he watches the boy nod enthusiastically. “I want to give it to you, Seunghyun-ah.”

The younger blinks, stunned. “...What?”

Jiyong can’t help but chuckle, running his hand through his hair nervously as he looks down, too shy to look at the younger’s wide eyes, in disbelief and yet hopeful. “My voice doesn’t suit the song, but I know yours will.” Jiyong says softly, not wanting to scare the other off if he went too strong.

“Are you sure?” Seunghyun asks. He looks from Jiyong and turns his head around the room with a curious furrow in his brows, cute pout on his lips. “Is this a prank?” He wonders aloud.

Jiyong laughs, playfully shoving the giggling boy to the side. “Yah! Be grateful.”

The younger was as in awe as he was when they entered the recording studio for the first time. It was empty when they got there and Jiyong didn’t know how to tell Seunghyun that he begged Teddy to have the day off for himself like this.

The older had