"We are all happy right now... but I can't help but think of the happiness we all will have if we are all together and complete, than all together but incomplete. I admit to being lonely most of the times, but not only for myself or for my group, but also for others who lost a... family in their group. And I once said this in an interview, 'the scariest thing in the world is to be left by the people who were once beside you'. And yes that's the scariest thing for me. Because you create a bond with them, all different from one another, and then suddenly you wake up one day without them by your side. And you know that they will never be back again. And everything will never be the same. Every day, wishing to turn back time and be together again.

I'm so jealous of SHINee sunbae-nim. Of course because they are complete, but because their bond is so strong that they are together and seeing that, they can depend on one another and tell their problems and share their worries and anxieties. And I wish we could be the same, at least we know what was wrong and will be able to help. Because having the regrets of not doing anything just because we do not know what was the cause in the first place is eating me up. The possibilities of avoiding the departures if we just know what was happening is always present in my mind.

But I also know that... this will not always last. Everything has its end. Someone will always leave, maybe not today but someday in the future."

"This subject is a delicate matter in our group, because we didn't just lost one member but three. And our maknae here never shed tears in front of us after the first departure. He always smiles, making us happy all the time, giving us strength and taking care of us. I see that he's holding the bind tight so that no one will be disheartened and make a decision that will make everyone give up. His smiles... they tell me that he doesn't want to see someone leave again. And every time I see our maknae smile, laugh, yelling that 'we are one'... I can't help but cry because even though now I'm the only Chinese member, I know deep inside that he's the loneliest. He's putting up a strong front for his hyungdeul even if he's the youngest. We are all close to one another, but our maknae here is the closest to each of us. And he's the most affected by the unfortunate departures in our group.

The first one was a shock. We are full of questions. Our maknae even asked if it was because of him. And that's heart breaking. Not knowing what really the reason was and thinking it was because of him. He's really hurting. The second one we understand. But the thought of letting go was hard for our maknae. We've known that it will gonna happen, but after the last day together, our maknae just stayed silent all day, all week. Realizing that there will be no 'Luhan hyung' to call anymore. But the third one was like a betrayal. After Kris' departure, we all thought no one's gonna leave the group and hurt the rest. I hope Tao knows what we feel right now after he decided to just not come back. And I hope he remembers who Sehunnie run to after the first two departures. I hope he realize how cruel he can be to a person.

We always say that no one makes the maknaes cry. But even though Sehunnie is not crying, we know that his heart is breaking. And Sehunnie is the one who's making all of us feel part of the group. It's not when we perform, it's not when we introduce ourselves. It's when after all the happenings and Sehunnie will always be there and care for us and tell us that 'We are one'. It's in the privacy of saying those words that we all feel we are part of EXO and that gives us strength each day."

NOTE: That was so short, right? I think, because of those departures Sehun today is dubbed as Loyal Sehun. Cheering everyone with 'WE ARE ONE', wanting to keep EXO members together. And I'm glad he stayed strong despite being upset with some members before their fifth anniversary. (You will know about it from their VLive on late night of April 7, 2017). His loyalty strengthened thru the departures.

And Lay's POV was clip that I saw from his interview (sorry, I don't know who the source is, but I think you all will remember which one I'm talking about.) What Lay said was so heartbreaking for me.

This work was created on July 12, 2016. The betrayed feelings only stayed on the work now. But the love for Sehun, Lay and the rest of the members, love for EXO, will always stay the same.

THANKS FOR READING!!!