FOUR:
Where We Left Off

As he slammed the door to his bedroom, he thought about how this didn’t use to affect him as much. Before he departed for college, Jinyoung had witnessed his parents fight so much that he could actually sort of bear it. But when they started up again in front of him tonight, he realized that five years away from home had chipped away at the defensive membrane he had learned to put on whenever these eruptions happened.

It was so stupid, he thought. Every and any little thing could set them off. His mother had neglected to set a place at the table for his father. So naturally, his father brought it up, and it turned into an issue. Then Boyoung got involved, frustrated that they had done this in front of her fiancee. Then, his mother stormed up to the master bedroom, threatening to run away.

She wouldn’t. She never did, not for long, anyway, and never permanently. It was a favorite empty threat of hers.

He started pacing, wondering what he ever did in the past to get through times like these. 

Jinyoung went over to the window, which gave him a view down into the garden out back. Minji was there, taking another call from a client. He and Minji were somewhat similar, he thought, in that they both considered themselves workaholics, but even he didn’t have clients this needy. Whoever it was, he or she seemed to need constant guidance and hand-holding. Minji was turned away, so he couldn’t read her expression. He hoped the phone call would end soon. He hoped she would come up soon. He never did bode well on his own, especially when his parents were at it again. 

He momentarily considered going down to the garden himself. He could sneak up behind Minji and hug her from the back. She hated being interrupted while on a call, but given the circumstances, maybe she would understand?

That was when something caught his attention in the periphery. It came from beyond the grassy gap between the Parks’ backyard and the row of traditional houses in the distance. A light flashed twice. 

Jinyoung held his breath. Was that real? Did he really see that?

It was their signal, their secret code. His and Jisoo’s. They came up with it when they were about twelve or thirteen. Two flashes. That was their code for “Are you awake?” and, tacitly, it also meant “can I come over?”

Jinyoung clenched his fist against the desk. He was positive that it was her. Two flashes, two beats, each one timed uniformly. 

Was she asking to come over? Now? He looked down at the digital clock on his desk and saw that it was almost ten in the evening. His family would be getting ready for bed soon. It was hardly the ideal time. 

Yet, then again, the lateness of the hour had never stopped them before. They used to use the light signal to sneak out to parties at one in the morning or go on 3 am pancake runs at the 24-hour diner. 

And he did miss her. God, did he miss her. Especially now. 

Jinyoung switched all the lights off in his room. Then he lifted the blinds up from the window and reached for the lamp on his desktop, flicking it on, off, on, off.

Jisoo sat in the driver’s seat, nervously tapping her thumbs against the wheel. She was parked on the street in front of the Parks’ house and it was almost ten in the evening. It was a very short drive, five or so minutes, but it only took thirty seconds on the roads for her to start panicking.

Which was weird because she never panicked on her way to the Parks’ house. Ever. The Parks’ house was like her second home, or at least it was five years ago. 

Jennie’s flyer was folded in half and lying on the passenger seat. Jisoo tried to come up with a script of some sort. It would be too awkward if she just handed him the flyer and left. That wasn’t the purpose of their light signals. Two flashes meant “Are you up?” Two flashes meant “Is this a bad time?” Two flashes meant something important had come up. 

She had decided she was going to be friends with him again. Five years had passed. She was sure that that was enough time. She was sure that by now, she ought to be well out of love with him and ready to ease back into a steady, completely platonic friendship with him. After all, that was why she had come home: to move on from her failures, including this one. But none of that was going to happen unless she addressed her long silence. Five years was also a lot of time to catch up to.

She was in the middle of settling on her words when she saw the Parks’ screen door swing open, and a figure emerged. Jinyoung stood on the porch, looking left and right twice before seeing her sitting in the car.

With a sigh, Jisoo grabbed the flyer and then exited the vehicle. Jinyoung watched her as she crossed the street, jogged up to the porch, and then stopped in front of him.

Déjà vu.

They stood there for a little while, staring without trying to make i