"Seungwan-ah! What are you doing? Let's eat ~ "Exclaimed seulgi from outside of the room.

"Okay, seul, in a minute ~" I say, as hastily applying a pink lip tint to my lips. Before leaving the room, I watch my own reflection on the mirror. Hummh, hair okay, makeup okay, clothes okay! Nice! I told myself with a big smile.
I pick up the bag that I had prepared on my desk and immediately walk out.

In the dining room several residents of the house have gathered. There's Kang Seulgi, his best friend since the first year of university. As always, the tomboyish slash chick girl is always smart to dress when going to college. Very different from her behavior when being at home or dorm. This morning Seulgi looks charming wearing a black jeans, a gray turtleneck sweater, and a black long coat. Her long black hair looking flawlessly beautiful fall in her back.

"What are you doing standing in there, unnie? " A voice asked.
I turn around to find a  girl walking toward me. "My God, Yerim~ It's still morning and you've look annoyed already, " I chuckled at the girl.
Yeri stuck out her tongue at me and smiled. "I'm not. I'm just act like all the third years of high school's student do. " She complained. "Unnie, you should be the one who more understanding," She added while opening the fridge and picking up a carton of milk.

"Seungwan-ah, it's no use to argue with that girl! Just come on, sit and eat your breakfast. Joohyun unnie already make us fried rice kimchi to eat." Seulgi said calmly.

I walk over to the table. In the kitchen, there is a rectangular table surrounded by five chairs. I sit in one of the chairs, put my bag in the chair beside me, and start to scoop up the rice on to the plate that had been prepared by seulgi.

"Waow, Joohyun unnie is always jjang! What time did she wake up to prepare all of this?” I asked full of admiration.

.
"I do not know. I woke up at 5 am and she was ready to go out. " Seulgi replied. "Yerimah, let's eat! Here, I already prepared your plate. Dont just drink milk. You wont have any energy later. "

"Unnie, I do not have any appetite. I feel like throwing up right now, "Yeri said limply. She then sit in a chair next to Seulgi.

"What is wrong? Are you sick? Are you having a cold? "I asked worriedly as I put my hand on her forehead. But apparently her body temperature did not rise.

"Just let her be, seungwan. Today is the day when her test results come. She just nervous. "Said Seulgi.

I let out a small laugh hearing that. "Breathe in, breathe out. It is okay, yerimah. When you've put a lot of effort, you just need to accept the results. You surely will doing good. I always see you studying, so the results will be good! " I encourage her.

"Unnie~" Yeri cried as she walks towards me and grabs me in a hug. "Yoksi! Seungwan unnie can always be relied upon to calm my heart! " She added.

I laugh at Yeri's words and Seulgi just shake her head watching both of us. "Just eat your food ~ We will be late,"

Yeri let go of her hug and walks back to sit and eat her breakfast. Meanwhile the phone in my bag rang. I search into my bag for a while before I finally found the phone.

"Oh my god! " I say loudly.Two heads in front of me looked up. Yerim shouted "wae, wae. Wae? "But I just shake my head and run to the porch to make a callback.

---

"So what's wrong? Who is calling? "Asked Seulgi curiously. She finished eating. In front of her a book full of pictures was open. She wanted to call seulgi a nerd, but then she remembers that she often did that herself

.
"Yaaa, unnie, wae? Wae? "Asked yerim, her eyes shining curiously.

"Uuuh .." I started. "Yoongi oppa's mom called me," I say weakly.

"Oh My God! What is wrong with her unnie ?! Why is she calling you again? She called you like thrice a week! Do she even call her son as much as you ?! If it like this, you should also become her daughter in law, unnie! "Yeri said resentfully.
 

"Yaaa! Kim Yerim! " Cried Seulgi warily. I shake my head at Seulgi, telling her to calm down.

"Unnie ~ I'm not in fault here! Yoongi oppa's mom always make seungwan unnie to do chore for her. "Yeri explained. "Seungwan-ah, please go to Yoongi's apartement and make him some dish ... make gamja-tang if you can cause it is yoongi's favorite food --- oh my god, look! I even know his favorite food since she always say it over and over again to you, unnie! "Yeri added as she shake her head.

Seulgi and I laugh looking at the way yeri imitating Suga’s mom. Yeri is really very funny when imitating the typical voice of yoong's mom. I sighed. Actually I do not mind to help aunt care for Yoongi. No, of course not. After all, Yoongi is a childhood friend of mine. Although he is one year older than me, my childhood was filled with memories of me and him. So it's not a big deal to make his favorite food, help clean up his apartment, or just check if he’s still breathing or not in his apartment. I can do it all with pleasure. It's just ... yes, that, something. Something that makes me awkward and hate to do all these things, happend.

I feel a tap on my shoulder by seulgi. "It's okay ... you can do it ... if it will become so hard on you, then just tell her that you can not. " Seulgi said soothingly to me.

I looked at her and nodded. "Pray for me," I say over dramatic as I pretend to cry.

"Hahahaha, damn you! " Said Seulgi later before bursting into laughter.

---
"Yerimah, do not forget to lock the door before you go, okay? " I reminded Yeri, who was waiting for a pickup from her friend to go to school.

"Okay ~" Yeri exclaimed from the dining table. She still has not finished his breakfast.

"Be careful on the way and do well in school! "I say again.

"Okie doki," She replied casually.

"Do not cause trouble. We will see you on weekends, "Seulgi said.

"Okay ~ I will not. "

"Call us if something happend," I add again.

"Okay, unnie! Just go! Oh my god, I'm not such a child! You two should go now, or else you'll late! "Yeri said resentfully.

"Hahahaha," We both burst out laughing. "Okay, see you! "I exclaimed before opening the front door.

Seulgi and I walk side by side all the way to the bus stop. My head is filled with worries about the request from yoongi’s mom. I cursed my self for being such an idiot to follow all auntie request. Even tough I already promise my self to limit my interaction with yoongi oppa this years. I just can sighed.

"Seulgi-a, You should go first. I 'll going to yoongi oppa' s apartement first. "I said when the bus that we both ride already stop in the bus stop near our campus.

"Huh? You do not have any class this morning? "Asked Seulgi, surprised.

I shake my head. "No, I do not. I came early to meet up with my club’s friends but ... yeah, I guessed I need to cancel it. "I explained.

"Oh, okay. Then see you later! Fighting! " She encouraged me. I smile at her and watch as she walks away toward the campus before walking heavily in the opposite direction. "My poor self," I told myself.

--
Ting tong ting tong ting tong - - - - -

I press the door bell repeatedly. Feeling impatient for fear that the ice cream I am carrying will melt. I do not see anyone open the door, I'm surprised. Yoongi oppa does not live alone in this apartment. Yes, he lives with Hoseok oppa, his best friend since high school. So although yoongi overslept, usually hoseok will open the door. I reach the phone in my purse, trying to contact yoongi oppa, but it's useless, my call is not picked up. Just like when I called him earlier to make sure I could visit him at this time. The first thought in my head is that he must be asleep, because that's what often happens. Therefore, earlier I contacted hoseok oppa and hoseok oppa told me to just come. So here I am now. In front of the apartment door whom the owner seemed not at home. As I am putting my phone back in my bag, suddenly the door in front of me burst open. Spewing a man in a messy look-his hair was uncombed and there is a bun in his mouth.

"Hoseok oppa! "I shouted.

"Oh, uh, Wendy ah! You've come, come in, come in, "he said after releasing the bun from his mouth. "I'm sorry I'm in hurry, so see you later," he said before running in a hurry.

I who had entered the apartment could only look at him amused while shaking my head. That particular sunbaenim is always full of vigor. In stark contrast to his stone-like friend.

I entered the apartment. I already familiar with the apartment layout because I has been in and out countless times before.

"Excuse me," I say politely as I enter the apartment. At first glance I realized that the apartment was filled with the sound of thunderous music coming from yoongi's room. His habit is really bad. How could he sleep with that loud music? I wondered.

My feet walks to yoongi's room to tone down the voume of the music, before realizing that I had to put ice cream in the refrigerator as soon as possible. "Ah. Damn! Why am I so forgetful? "I told myself.

I turn around and walk toward the kitchen, which is located close to the living room. I open the refrigerator, find that it was empty, and then fill it with my groceries.

This is how two men live alone. Nobody will ever want to cook or make sure their food supply is still there. I say to myself.

"Um, what should I make for him? "I mumble. "Ah, I know, I'll make him Japchae," I suddenly got the idea as I took out the ingredients from the refrigerator.
"Noddles, mushrooms, sesame oil, soy sauce ..." I mumble as I pull out all the ingredients I need.

That's when suddenly, the music played in yoongi's room is stopped. 'Huh?' I said, not realizing that the electricity in the apartment was dead for a moment. 'Huh? Is it the power failure? "I asked again to myself when I realize that the refrigerator in front of me is stopped working. I get up from the floor and is going to turn on a little lamp near the dining table just to test is it the power failure or not when suddenly I heard a voice coming from yoongis room.  Then my stupidity begin. Defeated by curiosity I walk to yoongi’s room. ‘What is that voice? Am I hallucinating or is it a real voice? “

But, yeah, I'm so stupid. Very stupid. If there is the world's dumbest race, then I'm the winner. Although I was very curious and wanted to make sure, I should have been smarter to walk away. But no, I just volunteered to walk into the abyss of grief. I'm really stupid.

I walk to yoongis room. My step stops when suddenly the music heard again. 'Ah, the electricity is back on,' I told myself. But I was right in front of his bedroom door, I have no choice to just peek what is happening inside and what is that voice about. I carefully peeping through the open door. That's when I realized what it was. From the crack of the door I could see two figures hugging each other, without a single garment. Suddenly my listening became strong and beat the loud music.

“Ahhh, Ahhh, Yesss, Sugaaa ... Aahh ... deeper please ... aahh ... " The girl screamed. I could see her long fingers gripping the back of yoongi. The sound of moans from both of them mixed together. The girl's roar became louder and instantly disturbed when yoongi looked down and kissed her lips fiercely. I covered my mouth with both hands, so that the sounds of my mouth would not be heard. My pupils widened, my heart suddenly beat fast, and my cheeks flushed. I turned away, unable to see more than that. I immediately lifted my legs from there, reflexively running out-trying to find the furthest place possible from the center of my grief at the time.

---
My tears that since 10 minutes continue to flow have started to dry up. I sighed, trying to calm myself. Now I'm in the convenience store not far from yoongi oppa apartment complex.

At first I intended to escape from there, but then realized that I was out without carrying my bag. What a stupid act. I can not leave without my bag, my cell phone, and my wallet is there. Not to mention the research proposals for the competition I'm going to propose are in the bag. The proposal is very important beyond anything and I must present it today to my professor. "Aaaahhh, wae wae? Why all of this happen to me? "I say in frustration.

Tok tok tok --- a knock on the door makes me startled.

"Excuse me, are you okay? Are you finished now? I need to use the toilet, "said a voice from outside.

My face flushed. What a shame. What a shame. I open the bathroom door and apologize repeatedly while looking down in embarrassment.

---

 Ting tong ting tong tin --- "Come on in," Yoongi said while opening the door of his apartment. I go in hesitantly, looking right and left afraid to see his girlfriend.

"Where have you been? Why do you leave all of your belonging here? "Yoongi asked as he walked towards the refrigerator. His finger pointed toward the dining table, where my bag lay there.

"Ah, thats -"

 "And when did you come? Did hoseok open the door for you? I did not hear you come, "he asked again cut off my words.

I look at him with annoyance. How dare he cut me off? And you did not hear me coming? Huh, right! You're so busy at the moment! How can you be aware of my arrival ?!

"Auntie asked me to come here. As usual, she worried about you. And umm-I want to make something... but I forgot to buy some ingredients so I leave for a moment. "I lyed. Honestly I was bad at lying before, yeah before I knew the man in front of me. But now the lies are coming so easily, especially when it comes to this man.

"Then what did you buy? I dont see you bring anything"

‘Damn! Why is he sharp! 'I said to myself. Luckily before I could say another lie, a voice saved me-oh or no! Kang Hana, a girl the same age as yoongi, came to us. The girl is Yoongi's new girlfriend. Their relationship is only about 3 months. 3 months full of passion. But what's that 3 months means to me. I've often seen yoongi changes girlfriend as fast as girl changing her shoes. They last a maximum of half a year, then break up. Go on and on like that.

"Suga ~" Kang Hana called her boyfriend sweetly. "Ah! Wendy, what are you doing here? Are you here because of suga's mom again? " Added her when she sees me.

Yes, almost all his girlfriends know me. Of course it happens because I often come here and they also often come to yoongi apartment. When they asked yoongi about me, yoongi replied that I was his sister. Yes, sister from different blood. Seriously! But surprisingly all yoongi girlfriends have never been jealous of me, maybe because I'm very different from the type of women who yoongi like. Yes, yoongi likes an adult, y, and entertaining women. Really different from me. I’m short and chubby.

“Yeah, auntie asked me a favor, unnie," I say, trying to smile.

"Oooh, you've worked hard," She smiled at me.

I was touched with her kindness so that I smiled back at her --- this time sincerely.

"Suga, I'm going, okay? I have class this morning ~ I'll miss you, but I'll come tonight, " she said flirty as she grabbed the man in front of her closer. Her both arms are placed behind suga’s neck. And then she slowly kiss his lips. Suga replied to the kiss --- a kiss that was originally just a pecked and turned into a deep kiss accompanied by a small moans from both of them.

I really hope some alien come and kidnapped me right then and there. 'God, what is this trial? Why do you have to always test me like this? "I cried to myself. My face already like a boiled crab. I turned my gaze to the floor and decided to seek their attention with a fake cough when for almost half a minute they still had not moved away from each other.

"Oh, sorry, hehe, okay, I'm going! Bye bye, see you later, " Hana said with a small laugh and a sweet smile. As soon as Yoongi brought his girlfiend out, I run to the refrigerator to get some water. My throat felt dry and my body felt hot. I felt a fire burning inside me. But more than that, I again heard the cracking sound from inside my heart. 'Ah, something broke out again,' I say softly, patting my chest.

"What's wrong? Are you sick? "Suga asked suddenly to me. He looks at me who was patting my chest.

 "Ah, no, no ... I just choked," I lied. Yes, lies again.

"Oh, be careful when you drink wan," said Suga. "So what are you going to cook? "He asked.

"Umm, japchae! You okay with that? "

Suga nodded. "Ah, I can finally eat something decent," he said with a smile.

"Huh? You didnt go home during holiday? "I asked him.

Suga nodded. "You know that I hate my home so much. Is it even a question?”.

I shake my head, a little sad to hear it. "What else do you want to eat? I'll make it for you, "

Hearing my question, He laughed. "Hahaha, you are so easily manipulated wannah! I'm okay with japchae! "He said amused. "Aahh, I'm so tired and sleepy. Do you mind if I sleep for a moment? "Said Suga while stretching his hands.

"Okay, I'll call you when everything is ready," I told him.

"Thank you," he smiles sweetly before walking to his room.

"Heart, heart, why do you so easily manipulated? "I told myself as I watch him walk away.

---

 Less than 10 minutes later, food is ready at the table. Still warm and ready to eat. I've also put the rest of the food in the refrigerator as a stash to eat for yoongi and hoseok oppa. Now I just have to wake the sleepy head. I sighed as I walk towards his room. Honestly, the room made me sick now. Sure, I've caught Yoongi and his grilfriends doing their thing a lot whether in the room or on the couch or in the kitchen or --- well, in many places, but still, those things always have an effect on me. I wish there was a vaccine that would make me immune to all these feelings.

Slowly I enter yoongi room. The room I've visited so often --- maybe as often as yoongi's girlfriends. The room is very simple because yoongi had another special room where he worked on his own music. I approach the man who was sleeping soundly on his bed. He is curled up like a cat. I look down, unable to not look at his sleeping face. At that moment all my feelings were mixed up. Why do I fall in love with this man? Why can not this man fall in love with me? Why can not I get away from you? I sighed. Thinking that my feelings would only be more broken by staring at him, I lifted my head to stay away. It was then, suddenly, yoongi pulls my arms and make me fall onto his bed-I’m falling right in his arms. I gasped. I can only hold my breath when I realize that I'm fully in his arms and our faces are just a few centimeters apart. I can even feel his breath. "Go, God, God! Help meeee !! "I prayed silently. My face is red, my body stiff in his arms, and my heart is like a drum-how can he not wake up with this very loud voice of my heart. My head is dizzy and all of a sudden, the eye in front of me is open. I immediately hold my breath. He woke up!

 - To be continued -