6. sechs

“How about this, Sehun?” Haneul turned her head to the corner Sehun was standing at, pointing at the bouquet she was holding. The man shook his head, again. Haneul frowned. It was already her fifth pick, but Sehun kept shaking his head. The girl put the flower back to the display before feeling a pair of arms circling around her waist.

“What do we do?” He leaned to peck her temple. “I couldn’t pick the pretty one because I already have the prettiest one here.” Sehun tighten the hug. Haneul turned her head to him in disbelief, but Sehun caught the slight blush which appeared on her cheeks. She has no idea that this man could be this cheesy. Sehun just chuckled looking at her bewildered expression featuring the slight red blooming on her cheeks. “Let me see. Which one do you like the most, Cupcake?” He asked, scanning the five bouquets she already picked, pretending not to notice the blush which getting more obvious.

“This one.” She took a bouquet which actually stood out the most around the others. “I really love the baby pink roses with the baby’s breath around them. It’s really simple but it’s the prettiest.”

“We’ll take that for the bouquet then.” Sehun said, earning a small smile from the girl.

Haneul scanned the other display of pretty flowers which filled the room. Both of them were still waiting for the florist who would take care of their wedding decoration. She looked at the other direction to observe a middle aged woman who was busy arranging some flowers. Haneul noticed the same flower Sehun brought her this morning—were currently arranged into a nice bouquet. The girl walked closer and took a seat beside the florist, earning a small smile from her.

“What are you here for, Young Lady? Arranging a wedding?” The older casually asked her questions. Haneul just nodded as an answer. “Your fiancé is really handsome.” The florist aunt smiled.

“Ah, thank you.” She could only bow as a reply. “Aunty, can I ask something?” The older nodded eagerly, seems happy that someone actually wanted to ask about the flowers and asking the girl about what kind of things she wanted to know.

“Daffodil?” The older turned around and reached behind her to take a bunch of daffodil before giving it to her. “Daffodil could mean a lot. The boys usually give it to the girl he loves to express things starting from I admire you, there can never be someone else, or just simply wanted to say that you’re the only one.”

Haneul stayed silent. She was touched. She had no idea that it actually could mean that much. “It really has a beautiful meaning, isn’t it?” The girl stared at the bunch of flowers she was holding both with a smile and sad feeling.

“Yes, but the thing is,” The older took a breath before finding Haneul’s eyes who was staring at her. “Daffodil has a hidden meaning. You know you could always use rose to express your love to someone. But those who choose Daffodil has something else. Something they wanted you to know, something they wanted to say, but they couldn’t.” Haneul’s heart pick a faster beat at that.

“Because behind those pure admiration, daffodil expressed a deeper love. As much as they wanted to tell you, they couldn’t. Because they know their love is an unrequited love.”

Haneul couldn’t stop thinking about what the middle-aged florist said to her earlier this noon. Yes, Sehun always brought her flowers every day, rose, lily, sunflower, you name it, and the man never forgot to tell her the story behind every single flower. But not with that one today. Haneul didn’t even know why she was wondering. Was it because the real meaning behind the flowers was the thing Sehun actually wanted to convey?

She looked at her side, at the man who was currently driving the car bringing them both to the dinner place he had already reserved. Was she thinking too much? She didn’t know. He was still as sweet as she could remember. But there’s no doubt that he was surprisingly quiet today.

“There will be a hole in my temple by the time we reach the café, you know?” Sehun suddenly said without even sparing a glance at the girl, keeping his eyes straight at the street in front of him, but Haneul did not miss the small smirk playing on his lips. Haneul blushed as she was clearly caught staring at him. “Is there anything you want to say, Cupcake?”

Haneul bit her bottom lip, fiddling her own fingers. “It’s just…” She said, having the man turned his head slightly to her direction before keeping it back to the front. The road was quite crowded, the man couldn’t risk their life just because he wanted to see her face. “You’re being exceptionally quiet today, Sehun.” It actually wasn’t the thing she wanted to say.

Sehun sent her a small smile before sighing. “I’m sorry, Haneul. There’s something that actually bugging me, but I don’t know if I could do something about it.”

“Company things?” She asked innocently.

He smiled bitterly. “Yeah,” Sehun answered as he pulled the car in front of a small café. “This place has a really nice waffle and hand-made gelato. Come on.” He informed her, earning an excited expression from the girl before she smiled at him from ear to ear. Don’t smile cutely like that to me, Haneul.

“So, you said you want to talk to me.” Sehun said when they were waiting for their order, breaking the silence between the two. He caught her still fiddling with her fingers, looking somewhat nervous.

“Sehun…”

He waited.

As much as she wanted him to know, the new knowledge about the daffodil actually kept bugging her. “Why…” She stared right into his dark orbs. “Why Daffodil, Sehun?”

Sehun smiled, but again, she caught the pain flashing on his eyes, hiding behind that gorgeous smile. “I told you to find it out by yourself though,” He answered playfully but Haneul kept her face serious, and Sehun seemed to notice it. He took a breath, “They say, Daffodil expresses an admiration. And from all these time I’ve spent with you, I couldn’t lie that these admiration grew even bigger.”

“Was it… was it really just that?”

Haneul caught his expression changed, seeming to realise that Haneul was aware about the real message he wanted her to know. “I don’t know…” Sehun kept his eyes on hers before letting out a sentence, “It’s probably related to the things you want me to know,”

The girl couldn’t hide the frown that instantly formed on her face. She didn’t know what Sehun was talking about. No, it was more like Haneul was afraid that Sehun knew what she was going to talk about. “What do you mean?”

Sehun just shrugged. Thankfully, the waitress came to bring their order, because really, Sehun didn’t want to talk about it, but at the same time he was dying to know. The truth. Although he was fully aware that it’s either going to mend his cracking heart, or it’s going to break the heart for real.

“Sehun, I can’t do this.” Haneul broke the awkward silence after a while. She had to do it because she really didn’t want to hurt anyone any longer. The man didn’t answer, getting the sign that he waited for her to continue, she then let out the most hurtful thing for Sehun out of her lips. “I can’t marry you. I already have someone I love.”

It feels like something pierced through her heart when Haneul saw the man sitting in front of her was still smiling. Sehun was smiling but the hurt in his eyes was painfully obvious. As if he has long known that he would hear that sooner or later. “Does he know about this?” Sehun asked.

“N—no, I haven’t told him.”

“I’m sorry, Sweetie, but you know how this work right?” He asked her again gently, “The invitations are ready to send. We only have a month left.”

“That’s why I told you. Because I don’t want to hurt you more, Sehun.”

Sehun planted his face on his palms and sighed. “You can hurt me as much as you want, Haneul, but I really shouldn’t have expected this much from you.” He took a sip from his cup, throwing his gaze outside the windows to avoid Haneul’s stare. His tone, it's no longer the soothing one he usually had when he was talking to her, Haneul realizes. It's cold.

The girl didn’t talk and just kept her gaze on the man who keep sighing in front of her. She didn’t know why but her heart suddenly aching. Haneul never saw him in this kind of state. The man in front of her was always smiling whenever she was around. He always tried to make her laugh with his witty joke. She never not noticed the effort he made to make her talk more. Truthfully, she felt comfortable. Of how he always asked her opinion. Of how gentle he treated her. Of how he always put her before himself. And she really couldn’t ignore the warmth engulfing her every time they were together.

“Why did you even agree to this? You should’ve turn it down from the very first time, Haneul.”

Her heart skipped a beat at those words. One thing she realised was, Sehun hasn’t been calling her name these days. He loved to call her with a sweet nickname, and that’s actually made her heart flutter a bit. But this time, her name rolled out of his tongue in such a painful tone. The girl couldn’t answer him. Yes, she shouldn’t have said yes to this arrangement from the very first time. But it was all before Kim Jongin happened.

“You should’ve done this before it went this deep, Cupcake.” Sehun said again, with the pain still piercing