A drunken haze. A state she has been in for the last few weeks, at least. As she stumbles down the all too familiar road, but this time alone. she figured that she was too drunk to entertain anyone tonight. This leaves her pausing mommentarily to lean against the nearest anything, in an effort to try and keep the vile acid that's bubbling up in her stomach, from reaching . This time it's just a brick wall, or she thinks it's just a brick wall.  Too tired to keep swallowing and sick of the stinging in her eyes everytime she squezes them shut, she decides to spill her guts on the patch of grass next to it.

She pushes off of the wall and unconciously wipes with her arm, leaving a small trail of gunk along the fabric of her sleeve. She didn't mean to get so intoxicated, but that's the same mantra she's been repeating to herself each and everytime this has happened, meaninglessly. She gazes up to the dark purplish sky, not knowing if it's late at night or early in the morning, She groans. Thoses groans turn into giggles, and giggles turn into yawns. She feels her legs buckle under the pressure of her swaying body, sliding down the wall and sitting not too far from the spot she vomitted all over. Her eyelids sag, and she comes saturated with darkness as she lulls to sleep.

 

....

"Sana-yah!"

A figure of a girl with bright orange hair shouts. Sana whips her head around desperately trying to find the source of that voice. She runs through what she believes is a fairground. Sana feels a slight tap on the shoulder and turns around, coming face to face with the girl-like figure. The figure's features become more apparent. Her eyes swirl until they find their final resting place in a dark milky brown color; the slope of her nose is dipped, small, and comes together to form a button nose with a slightly upwards tip, but Sana's sole attention is settled on the figure's smile. One that is blinding and unforgettable in every aspect, wide and overly proud in the best way possible. Every part about her is unique and easily indentifiable,

Kim Dahyun

Suddenly, Dahyun's face contorts, the fairgroung is gone. Sana feels raindrops hit her head, and they're outside of a coffee shop. Sana looks at Dahyun with the utmost worry, searching her eyes for any clues as to why she suddenly looks so somber. She notices that Dahyun's eyes start to drift; she looks down, her eyes resting on Sana's hand. Sana's eyes widen, she knows

"No.." Sana thinks "No, I can't- I- I won't." Her voice breaks

Sana squeezes her eyes shut, thinking of anything, anything but that, never again. She opens her eyes cautiously, the beach.. She feels the wind whip through her hair, strands fall over her eyes. Her hair is blonde. Her hair changed colors.

"Sana!"

Sana looks of into the distance and sees her standing up in the water, waving. Orange hair now brown, but the smile is still the same. Dahyun runs over to her in a hurry,

"You're back!" she smiles and grips Sana's hand.

Sana looks up at her and squeezes her hand tightly, "Yeah, I am."

Dahyun sits down next to her and nudges Sana slightly, "So, you're running out of time."

Sana nods her head, "I'm going to wake up."

Dahyun clears , "Um, yes, but that's not what I meant."

Sana's eyes widen, "What- What do you mean?"

Dahyun opens to talk, "You- wait, you know, " Dahyun gaze turns sorrowful, "Don't you?"

....

Sana's eyes open, and she's greeted with a bright blinding light that makes her eyes water

"Oww, the ?" She croaks while covering her eyes with her left hand

" Who are you, and what are you doing outside of my house." a girl's voice asks as she lowers the flashlight in her hand

"Uh, I- This is a house?" Sana answers, still tipsy from earlier.

The girl sighs, "Yes, this is house, please answer my question."

Sana looks like a deer in the headlights, "My- *ahem* My name is- Sa-na., and I kinda had a couple of drinks and-

"Okay, okay, I got it." The girl says

The girl comes closer to Sana and extends her hand. Sana grabs it and lifts herself off the ground.

"Thank you, oh and sorry, I kinda puked over here," Sana giggles drunkenly

The girl makes a face of disgust before she says, "I'm taking you home. It's like 4 o'clock in the morning, and you're obviously still drunk. The last thing I need right now is someone getting hit by a car in my neighborhood."

Sana, suddenly too tired to argue agrees.

The drive is pretty silent other than Sana telling the girl were she lives and the occasional directions coming from the girl's phone. She's sitting in the back (Sana's choice) and doesn't have the best view of the girl's face other. Her eyes travel up the dashboard and up to the rear-view mirror where a ID type thing is hanging off of it. The faint rays of light gliding across the inside of the car from the streets allow Sana to see a small glimpse of the picture and the name below it.

"Chou- Tzuyu?." Sana thinks out loud

She glances back into the rear-view mirror and accidentally locks eyes with the girl whhas a mildly suprised look on her face until realization washes over her. They hold eye contact for about 3 seconds; Sana looks away, a faint blush dusted across her cheeks .

Tzuyu speaks up, "So, do you live with a boyfriend or roomate?"

Sana laughs, "No, I have a girl-, actually, uh not anymore"

Tzuyu coughs, "Oh."

 

After awhile, they reach their destination. Tzuyu pulls into the parking lot of Sana's apartment building, and the car stops. Tzuyu gets out first, and helps Sana get out. Under the light of the parking lot lamps, Sana gets a better look of the girl. Sana can't fully examine her facial features in this state, even though her head is a bit clearer now then before. She just knows that she's really pretty and....tall, and almost nothing like Her. Tzuyu offers to help her to her apartment, but Sana declines and thanks the girl.

Sana made it halfway across the parking lot until a moment of impulse swishes Tzuyu away.

"Wait!" Tzuyu shouts

Sana turns around and her head in confusion. The girl jogs over to her.

"Here." Tzuyu take Sana's phone from her hand and quickly types in her number.

Sana looks at her bewilderedly as she feels her hert pound exceptionally loud, "Did- did you just give me your phone number?"

Tzuyu ducks her head down bashfully, "Um I- *ahem* I mean, I don't think anyone else would be so forgiving towards someone who vomitted right outside of their house. They'll probably shoot you or something. So, just call me if you're in the area, and I'll make sure that doesn't happen." Tzuyu coughs, "I mean, only if you want to."

Sana furrows her eyebrows, She was about to decline, but moved faster than her mind, "Sure."

Tzuyu brightens up, "Really? Cool. Um, I've got to go now. Are you sure you don't need anymore help?"

Sana shakes her head, "I'm good."

At this Tzuyu turns around and walks away from Sana.

Sana looks off into the distance for awhile internally cursing at herself for acting to fast, "What was that, come on? I don't need this right now."

....

Sana opens her apartment door and closes it, taking in a whiff of almost new apartment smell, indicting the amount of time actually spent in the room which is little to none. Even though, she moved in a while ago. She stumbles in the darkness for awhlie, too lazy to turn on the lights. She reaches the small, narrow hallwy to her bedroom, discarding her purse and creased light pink jacket by tossing them to the side, where piles of unwashed clothes have sat for at least weeks. Sana sits down on the edge of the bed, and takes off her heels, placing them next to the cardboard box she's been using as a nightstand. She sighs out of relief and momentarily massages her aching feet.

 

....

A few weeks ago

 

Sana tumbles through the corridor, laughs stuffled down with matching liquor soaked tongue and lips. She scans the numbers neatly lned up against the pastey white walls, her bloodshot eyes widening once she finds the one she needs. She awkwardly approaches the door of the apartment. Sana knocks on the door. No answer.. Out of frustraton, she slides down the wall next to the door and bangs her head against it. Knowing that she has somehow found herself here for the third time this week, snot expecting an answer. Getting in isn't a possiblity, close to impossible nowadays. Her keys don't fit anymore, changed locks and more importantly a changed heart; they both need new keys to open them. Keys that Sana doesn't have, and probably will never have.

She gets broken out of her thoughts when she hurriedly turned her head towards the sound of a door opening, and drunkenly smirks. Sana gets up on her feet with mild difficulty and approches the door. The sleepy figure in front of her rubs her eyes with her tiredly limp hands.

"Dahyun-" Sana giggles

Dahyun's eyes shoot open and she tries to slam the door, but Sana, even in her sluggish state, acts quickly, and sticks her foot in the doorway. A throbbing pain she'll have to deal with later

Dahyun groans, "why- why do you like to see me suffer?" She rests her forearm against the doorway and yawns, putting her head ontop of her limb.

Sana's about to defend herself but gets cut off by another person

"Dahyunie, who is it this time?" a weary voice says in the background.

Dahyun's eyes widen and turns around, "No one important...just go back to sleep"

Sana feels the anger bubble up in her stomach as she leans forward and sticks her head halfway through the threashold.

"Hey!-

Dahyun pushes her back, steps out of the doorway, and shuts the door behind her.

"What's your problem?" Dahyun raises her voice.

"Oh, so you're with Chaeyoung now, I see." Sana scowls

Dahyun sighs, "Sana, we've been over this. I told you over a month ago."

Sana crosses her arms, "I have know idea what you're talking about."

"What do you want from me?" Dahyun says almost desperately

Sana scoffs, "What do you mean. I'm here for you, obviously."

"No, no you can't keep coming here. We can't keep doing this..not anymore." Dahyun says firmly.

Sana's arms drop, and her formitable stance isn't so formitable, "You- you what? You said no?"

Dahyun breathes in deeply, "I did. Sana, we can't do this."

"No"

"We broke up about three months ago."

"No-

"I'm dating Chaeyoung now, you can't just-

Sana clenches her fists as tears start to form in her eyes, "No! No! NO! This- This isn't true. You just told me- we-."

Dahyun, obviously affected by Sana's pitiful state, says, "Sana, you don't think this is hard for me too-,"  

Dahyun stops midsentence and looks at Sana. Her eyebrows raising in realization and then falling down, forming a hard gaze,

"No- I'm NOT appolgizing to you. Sana, That was when I thought you could change. That's when I thought we could fix this, but we-." Dahyun stutters, "We- we- we can't."

Dahyun trying to keep her composure clears and blinks back tears threatening to spill. She takes a step closer to Sana "That was then and this is now."

Dahyun points a finger at her, "You can't keep coming here! You have to stop playing the victim. You keep forgetting that I'm not the one who messed the relationship up! It was you, but the thing is, the thing I hate-" Dahyun's voice cracks,.  " What- what I hate about this is that I don't hate you;" Her gaze softens. "I should, but I don't. But I did move on. Can you say the same?"

Dahyun takes a deep breath and takes a couple steps backwards until her back hits the wall. She feels a huge weight lift off of her chest. Her breathing slows down. She didn't even realize she was crying until Sana comes closer and wipes her tears. Dahyun doesn't want to look at her. but her eyes seem to wander and suddenly, their eyes lock. Time seems to slow down, Dahyun notices something in. She doesn't know exactly what it is. Sana's eyes are dialated, and Dahyun knows what's going to happen. Her mind's racing and her eyes widen; she's about to move, but it's too late.

Sana kisses her..

....Dahyun's paralyzed for a couple of seconds until her mind clicks back into place, "It's want, ha. She always wants what she can't have."

She pushes Sana back. Sana stumbles backwards and looks down with  immediate regret. Dahyun wipes with a look of disgust.

"This is exactly why we can't be together anymore. You act too fast, too intense, without thinking, and I'm done picking up your messes; following you around ,waiting for you to change because you can't, and you won't. You're never satistfied."

Dahyun pushes off of the wall and opens her door, "Leave Chaeyoung and me alone, I- I- love her. Why can't you  leave me alone, or, even better, just be happy for me?."

With that she leaves Sana alone.

 

....

Sana hasn't talked to Dahyun or Chaeyoung since. She's done her best to avoid Momo, Mina, and pretty much all of her friends, since Dahyun and Chaeyoung still hang out with them regularly. Even though, the two Japanese girls were her friends first. Sana remembers what happened when they all tried to meet up together.

 

"If you're going to act like I don't exist, then I might as well leave. Waste of my time anyways, come on Momo."

Of course Momo didn't budge

"Fine, Mina let's go."

Mina didn't move either, but she did mouth a silent, "I'm sorry."

....

 

Sana hasn't had the guts to face anyone of them again and probaby hasn't spoken to any of them in three or four weeks. It's been slowly killing her, but she's been "coping" by excessive drinking. Even she knows It's not the smartest move, but she doesn't care. It just heps her gt her mnd off of things. Somehow she refuses to accept it's her fault. She chooses to ignore what happened and will probably never own up to it, but she knows she has to.

Sana shakes her head, that specific memory leaving a dirty taste in . She lifts the covers and slowly gets under them, trying to fall asleep as quicky as possible.

 

....

Sana's back on the beach. The waves are crashing and the smell of salt is just as strong as before. She remembers the significance of this place. The first promises of "forever love" were exchanged by both Sana and Dahyun. Everytime she's brought back here, Dahyun takes longer and longer to show up, thus wasting more and more time.

"Dahyun!" Sana shouts as she runs towards her

"Let's go eat at our dinner, or maybe the fairground!" Sana says while hugging her

Dahyun let's her go, "Sana, no."

Sana smiles, "Uh, ok, I guess we can go to the park instead."

Dahyun shakes her head, "No, you don't get it. We can't go there anymore."

Sana's smile drops, "Ha, what do you mean? We can go anywhere! I'll prove it to you."

Sana squeezes her eyes shut and tries to imagine the dinner. She opens her eyes, but they're still on the beach.

"Wait, hold on. Maybe I didn't try hard enough." Sana says

Sana tries again but still fails. She jumps up and down out of frustration and tries one more time. Nothing.

"I guess we'll just stay here then." Sana shrugs

Dahyun shakes her head again, this time slower, "We have to go."

Sana's confused, "What do you mean?"

It's raining...Coffee shop... Sana knows

"NO! I can't.. I won't remember! You can't make me." Sana tries to imagine herself out of the situation,but it doesn't work. She frantically tries to come up with a solution, but she can't. Everything's happening so fast. She tries to run, but she can't. Something or someone has cemeted her in place.

Sana knows. This is-

"Sana looks at Dahyun with the utmost worry, searching her eyes for any clues as to why she suddenly looks so somber. She notices that Dahyun's eyes start to drift; she looks down, her eyes resting on Sana's hand. Sana's eyes widen, she knows...."

The whole scene plays out in the dream again. Sana tries to tear her eyes away from Dahyun, but she can't. She tries to shut them, but she can't. She doesn't want to remember. She doesn't want to remember that it's all her fault. She doesn't want to remember that she's the one who cheated. she doesn't want to-

Sana Knows That This Is Where She-

She feels something grip her hand.. It's someone's hand..But It's not Dahyun's....

It's some girl that doesn't matter, and that will never matter..Sana opens to speak, to say something, anything, but she can't. How is she supposed to tell Dahyun that she missed the most important day of their relationship to hook up wit- with some girl? How is she supposed to explain that she can't help herself ? How is supposed to explain that she did it again?......Sana knows.. Sana knows that

This is where she ruins it all.

 

 

Sana doesn't want to be there. She wants to leave. She wants to go to the beach. She wants to go back to the best part...

But she also is longing for some type of closure, anything that'll help her be happy again, and this may just be it

 

 

 

She's decided

 

 

 

 

 

To be continuted....?

---

A/N: Um, Hi! This was orginially going to be a one-shot, but now I'm not so sure IDK. It really depends on if any of you want another chapter. Anyway, I got the title from a Daniel Caeser song called, well, "Best Part" so yeah. I kinda wanted to leave it a bit open ended. It's down to Sana to choose if she wants to face the reality of the break up and move on(Possible Satzu), or if she wants to hold on to "The Best Part", never fully let go, and ultimately hurt herself in the end. But if I do write another chapter or another couple of chapters, then I'll obviously make some kind of closure good or bad ^.^    Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it!

Until next time,

IronDel

(P.S. There may be some gramatical errors because I wrote this mostly at night sooo sorry for that.)