Chapter 34

They kissed.

Finally.

How many times had Jessica pictured this exact moment in her mind ever since the first moment she realized she was in love with Yoona? Hundreds? Thousands? Those cringe-worthy romantic scenes in dramas. Something like they were hiking in the mountain, finally reached the top, as they watched the sunrise, Yoona pulled her in for a sweet kiss while the sun slowly coming up. Or they were walking on a beach, as Yoona enjoyed the feel of ocean breeze ruffling softly through their hair and listening to the sounds of waves crashing against the shore, Jessica suddenly stole a kiss when she wasn’t looking. Or even more simple, they were having a romantic dinner, soft music playing in the background, Yoona just smoothly leaned forward over the table and kissed her in the dancing light from the candle.  

These imaginations seemed to be endless. They might be different from time to time, from setting to the person who initiated but there was one thing that would never change: Jessica’s contentment afterward. Even if it was just imagination, still she would be overly happy.

But reality seemed to be an exception.

Jessica closed her eyes the moment she felt Yoona’s lips pressed against her as she also wrapped her arms around the latter’s body, pulling her close. Thinking this was it, this was the moment she had been waiting for all her life. Jessica expected to feel that firework in her mind, those butterflies fluttering in her stomach and a racing heart but there was none of that. As if the person she was kissing wasn’t Yoona. As if she was kissing a stranger who she felt nothing for. To look for an answer to her abnormal reactions, Jessica slowly opened her eyes to look at the person in front of her and she finally understood why.

Tightly closed eyes, a frown wrinkling her brow, normal breathing was all that Jessica could see. Was this the look of someone kissing a person they desired? No! Yoona, other than being gentle to her, showed her nothing. No lust, no passion. Just pure intimacy. This kiss was like Yoona was paying a debt to her. A debt of gratitude. Jessica didn’t feel anything special about this kiss not because she didn’t love the girl it was just that this wasn’t what she wanted. For all those years, all that she wanted not just love, but mutual love. Was it too much to ask?

Having proven enough, Jessica loosened her grip on Yoona since she wanted to pull away. But before she could do that, the loud sound of something splashing on the ground was heard and the loud noise eventually broke them apart.

They both turned to the direction of the sound and saw a tall figure standing a few meters away with her round empty eyes staring at them. The three almost empty cups of tteokbokki rolling on the floor, sauces spilling all around and on the bewildered girl’s white sneakers.

“Sooyoung-sshi??” Yoona was the first to address the name of the motionless girl.

The word heartbroken was an understatement of what Choi Sooyoung was feeling right now. She got it. She completely understood the fact that they were dating. Happily dating she might add. They could go to the movies, the parks, the beaches or wherever the hell they wanted but why here? Her place. Her own private paradise. Why did they have to rub salt in her wounds? Jessica Jung was the cruelest person she had ever known.

Her heart was aching so much in her chest that Sooyoung found it hard to speak anything. Both of her hands clenched into fists, fighting the urge to throw a fit at the scene and make a fool out of herself. She had no right to do anything. They were dating. This was normal. Right, she had to act normal in front of them. Sooyoung was a strong woman. She had been one and would always be one. This little heartache didn’t mean anything. Sooyoung kept telling herself that but before she could control it, tears already swelling up in her eyes as she spoke the next few words.

“Wh-what a coincidence… Ha-ha…” She awkwardly forced a fake laugh, “I kinda interrupted you guys, didn’t I? Ha-ha, I didn’t mean it though… D-don’t mind me… Just c- Damn it!!” Sooyoung cut herself off as she turned away from the scene when she felt tears started to roll down her cheeks. She couldn’t keep acting like there was nothing wrong with her when her insides felt like someone was stabbing her with a sharp knife with every word she said.

And Sooyoung did the thing she should have done from the very beginning when she saw them together. She ran away.

While Yoona wasn’t moving from her spot the whole time with an unsure look on her face, Jessica, on the other hand, almost instantly, breaking away from their embrace with a rough push the moment she saw Sooyoung running away.

“Yah!! Choi Sooyoung!” Jessica yelled out as she immediately ran after the girl.

More confused than ever, Yoona just stood there watching her girlfriend chasing after another girl. This was odd. How did she end up in this situation? Yoona couldn’t believe in the fact the she was just being pushed away by Jessica. The girl claimed to be in love with her for years. Before she could think of anything else, Yoona felt her phone was vibrating in her pocket, indicating an incoming call which she quickly picked up after seeing the caller ID.

“Hello?”

‘Hey, are you coming back to the hospital soon?’ Came Yuri’s voice from the other line.

“Maybe… another 20 minutes… Why? You need me now?” Yoona replied after looking at her watch while thinking that her date with Jessica ended sooner than she expected.

‘Ah, no… I’m not in a hurry, I’m just wondering. Uh… also… we have an issue.”

Yoona furrowed her eyebrows “What is it?”

‘Yong appa.’

&&&&&

“Yah!! Sooyoung!!” Jessica kept shouting out as she ran after the girl who shown no sign of stopping.

Even though Sooyoung tried her best to run as fast as possible, as mentioned before she was nowhere near an athlete and her model-like legs were for display only. A few more hundreds meters, Jessica quickly caught up with Sooyoung the moment she sped up. She grabbed the taller girl by her shoulder, forcing them both to halt.

“Yah, stop…” Jessica said while trying to catch her breath.

Still not turning around, Sooyoung quickly wiped the tears in her eyes away. She didn’t want to see Jessica right now. She needed time. The truth was she wanted to keep running but her body wouldn’t allow her. She was already out of breath.

Jessica took a few steps forward as she wanted to stand in front of Sooyoung, facing her. As she tried to do that, the taller girl just kept turning away from her. If Jessica didn’t have a tight grip on her arm, Sooyoung would probably start to run again.

“Yah… look at me…” Jessica hopelessly ordered.

“No!”

“Aigoo… Why are you acting this way? Are you this mad at me?”

Mad? Sooyoung was furious. She caught her goddess kissing someone else. Yes, it was her girlfriend but still, Jessica was her goddess. Even though that title was just something she gave Jessica all by herself but it didn’t matter. What mattered was that this was her market, her comfort zone. She had the right to be mad.

“What if I am? Don’t I have the right to be?” Sooyoung shamelessly exclaimed.

Well, technically she didn’t.

Jessica couldn’t help but let out a chuckle while facing the tall girl’s back. This was what she loved most about Sooyoung, she always spilled out all her emotions. What she was feeling inside was what was shown, no holding back. That was why it was so comfortable hanging out with her.

“Alright, you do, you sure do. Will you look at me now?” Jessica gave in as she spoke softly.

“No!”

“Are you gonna keep avoiding me forever?”

That was not possible.

“No…”

“Then turn around…”

“I-I just don’t want you to see me like this.” ‘I don’t want you to see me crying’ was what she wanted to say but she decided to cut it short since the last part sounded pathetic somehow.

“What’s wrong with ‘this’?”

“It ruined my image.” Sooyoung blurted out.

“You have an image??” Jessica accidentally let out a big laugh.

Feeling embarrassed because of the outburst, Sooyoung tried to yank her arm out of Jessica’s grip only to find it impossible. Seriously, she was like one head taller than the latter and yet she just couldn’t do anything to get away from her.

“Just… let go, will you?” Sooyoung finally said.

“If I let you go now, this might be the last time I hold you back. Are you sure you want that?” Jessica seriously said.

The sudden change in tone surprised Sooyoung. Of course, she didn’t want that to happen. And that question was like an eye-opener for Sooyoung as if a light bulb went on in her smart brain. That was right, Jessica was here, holding her back which also meant that she left Yoona alone behind. Was she dreaming? She immediately turned around, looked Jessica right in the eyes.

“Why are you here?”

“I ran after you.”

“I know, but why?”

“I just did… Aren’t you glad I did?” Jessica replied with a small shrug.

Finally, after days and days drowning in depression, a bright smile broke out on Choi Sooyoung’s beautiful face. It was so bright that it could possibly lit up the sky.

“Does this mean…”

“I’m not gonna lie. When I saw you turning away, the first thing came to mind was that I have to run after you no matter what. Make sure you’re okay.” Jessica honestly admitted. It was true, she was dazed the whole time to see the person she expected the least showing up. But as soon as she caught a glimpse of those teary eyes from the corner of her eyes, her body just reacted on its own. And before she knew it, she was already here with this shikshin, appeasing her. As if she knew that if Sooyoung somehow managed to get away, she would probably take something belong to Jessica along with her also.

That smile on the tall girl’s face turned into a cocky grin. Sooyoung felt like she was trapped in a broken elevator falling at full speed, there was no way out and she just waited to be shattered. Then suddenly a superhero came and caught her just in time before she hit the ground, saving her from misery. As long as there was a happy ending at the end, Sooyoung wouldn’t mind a few bumps on the way.

“So… I have a chance, right, right, right?” Sooyoung said as she grabbed Jessica’s shoulders, shaking the small girl back and forth with every ‘right’ coming out.

“You tell me…” Jessica didn’t deny.

Sooyoung pumped her fist in the air excitedly, “Yes, I knew it. I’m the Choi Sooyoung. And once Choi Sooyoung set out for something, she will get it!” The feeling of being a failure the last few days had been completely washed away because of a few words coming from a certain person. Sooyoung was just so carefree, easy to please sometimes.

“Now, come… I’m gonna buy you those tteokbokki cups that you dropped, the Choi Sooyoung.” Jessica offered while pulling the excited girl along.

And that grin on the shikshin’s face just grew wider and wider.

Taking today off was the best decision she had ever made in her life.

A.N: A short update. I was quite busy this week, this chapter wasn't that good either but I'm kind of stuck at the moment, no juices coming out :((

Btw, I'll be on a business trip next week so I might not be updating anything next Sunday. Sincerely apology to my readers.