I used to think about the future a lot. Where I would be and where I want myself to be. I wondered if I would still be here, up on the stage performing? Or would I gradually transition behind the cameras, on the other side of the screen? I thought about it a lot. 

It would occupy my thoughts and haunt my dreams leaving me in a trance on days where I shouldn't be. However the future was unknown and so was my certainty in ever coming to a conclusion with that. I don't want to know the end of my story. I suppose the joy in reading a book is learning throughout the way and as they all say, it's the journey, not the destination, that matters.

I thought about settling down. Having a family of my own in the future. I wondered what it would be like to have a wife with a comfortable home fit just for us alongside our four children. The house would be small enough- I'm not one for such grandeur. I like simplicity.
Sometimes I catch myself daydreaming about having a simple life in the future. I see myself walking down the wooden stairs of our humble home and with heavy steps as I follow the waft of eggs and bacon and freshly brewed coffee. As I near the kitchen I faintly hear the children's voices, they get louder and louder, mindlessly chatting about sense and nonsense.
Then I stop and see her silhouette as she stands over the cooker, my wife, completely unaware of my loving stares as she focuses hard on frying the eggs.

"Welcome Jinyoung! We're so happy to have you on board"

Then I would snap out of that foolish daydream and tell myself that it's near impossible. I haven't found anyone. I don't have anyone. Sure, I've dated here and there. Some were idols and some were of non-celebrity status. Albeit none caught my eye enough to want to stay. Most of them were flings anyway. They were shortlasting and fleeting.

Love never fades- hence my conclusion that I was never in love in the first place. At least that's what I tell myself. All I really know is that I grew tired of it. Loving requires a lot of work and demands all effort. Being an idol is already strenuous as it is. There's never a time for it in my opinion. The career I chose to pursue doesn't permit it. I don't really mind though, it was never a big problem for me.

"Jinyoung I'd like you to meet your co-workers.. I'm sure you've heard of them before, both are from groups who've just newly debuted last year..."

Besides there are far more important things in life at the moment than having relationships. I, for one, plan on accomplishing my set goals. Call it a bucket-list if you want; I made it a long time ago when I was still a mere trainee.
I promised myself I would try my hardest to complete them. It was my own personal source of strength. I drew from it most especially on the days where I didn't see my family nor hear from them in a while and on days where I would find myself in the practice rooms all alone, completely worn out, dripping with sweat and nearly faint from hunger.
Life was tough back then, but I was determined to be tougher. You had to be. I promised myself that once I made it- I would do everything that I can to ensure that each rough box on that worn out paper would be ticked. Nothing would get in my way.

"Come on in, we're just having a short meeting. We're discussing the details and answering any questions you may have at the moment.. the other two are already in there"

Then I saw her. The short girl with jet black hair, staring up at me with her puffy eyes. Her face was noticeably bare but her skin was cream like and fair. Her face then slowly formed into a smile so bright I sworn I saw the sun shining from behind her.

It was at this moment that I felt time had stopped- no, I wanted it to stop. I wanted to play with time and stretch this one moment out into a thousand. I wanted to frame every second of it. I wanted my brain to memorize all the lines across her face, how the curves on her cheeks vaguely formed into soft dimples, how her plump heart shaped lips tugged into a dazzling smile, how her eyes crinkled into half moon shapes unveiling her matured self yet still remaining youthful all at the same time. In fact, she was the epitome of youth.

I didn't want to say It was love at first sight- to be frank, it's a hackneyed phrase that I refuse to acknowledge in all my 22 years on this earth. I would rather say it was an intense attraction at first sight. So intense I felt myself unable and unwilling to look her in the eyes. That intensity completely swallowed me up and I felt warm even under her brief glances.

It felt like the sun was right before me and I was left feeling helpless, sweltering under its lustrous presence. Of course, the sun was not to be held at fault, for the sun was doing exactly what was expected of it; it provided light, it gave life and brightened up the darkest corners of the earth. Just like how I couldn't blame the girl for the emotions I felt when I had my first encounter with her.

"Hi nice to meet you" she playfully waved her hand then bowed in respect. "Let's give this our all" she then formed a fist with her right hand and pumped it up lightly. The blonde haired boy beside her cheered on in response.

Suddenly I was reminded of the daydream I had earlier. I'm back in the humble home and I'm standing in the hallway. It was exactly how I left it. The only difference is that the silhouette of my wife earlier became much clearer. I'm suddenly curious about her. I want to know what she looks like and what she's like. I try to walk forward, urging my feet to move but they become locked to the ground. I can only squint my eyes as I try to get a glimpse of her face.

Just then she conveniently turns around and I am taken aback from shock.

It's her, my version of the sun. It's Kim Jisoo.

AN: hope you guys weren't too confused with thetime jumps in this first chapter!! it's my first time ever writing something like this. in fact its one of my first fanfics ever that I have the motivation to actually want to finish!! I love jinyoung and jisoo hehe. as you can all tell I was feeling very emo hence all the dramatic feels in this chapter- its from streaming JJ Projects Tomorrow, Today I tell you. (STREAM TOMORROW. TODAY on melon, genie and yt! and vote for them on Show Champion too!) if you guys have any questions just comment below! also I'd love to hear your thoughts so far- so comment below!