Step 3: Have friends.

Human interaction is already highly unadvised, becoming friends with other humans is a whole other level bad ideas. They're just generally horrible (especailly if they go by the name of Kim Taehyung).

“So how’d it go” Taehyung asks as he waggles his eyebrows suggestively at the boy,

“Fine I guess”

“Fine? That’s all I get, after all the hard work I went through to introduce you two”

“You literally only said-“

“I’m hurt” he says dramatically, falling to the worn out couch with a hand to his heart. “Seriously though did anything happen? Any phone numbers? Dating status?”

“No and no, but I did find out that he’s a boy so I guess you were righ-“

“I told you so!” Taehyung exclaims jumping up from his previous position on the couch. “I knew I recognized those eyes. He was the boy that moved in last week.”

“Yeah I guess he is.”

“Aren’t you excited? Pretty boy down the hall, isn’t that like that one stupid show you were watching a couple weeks ago.”

“It’s Flower Boy Next Door , and it’s not stupid it’s adorable. Also, why would it matter to me where the kid lives” Yoongi says dismissively, ignoring the scoff he gets from Taehyung.

“Same thing. Anyways, don’t lie; you totally have a thing for said ‘kid’. Did you not see how red your face was when he showed up earlier? You were more awkward in front of him than you are with most people and that’s saying something. Plus everyone knows that you’re into the pretty ones.”

“Stop exaggerating, I wasn’t even blushing. Also since when was I into pretty boys” Yoongi says defensively.

“Since forever, must I remind you of the time when you fell for a certain Kim Seokjin, who is the definition of pretty boy, at first sight, only to find out that he was m-“

“Why do guys keep bringing this up” Yoongi says exasperatedly, embarrassed flush on high on his cheeks. “It was literally two years ago”

“Because my friend, it is an important part of the timeline of our friendship. Quite an iconic event if I do say so myself” he snickers, yelping as Yoongi jumps on him about to give him a piece of his mind. Suddenly, the sound of the door to Taehyung’s dorm opening catches the boys’ attention.

“Babe?” the boy yells from the door, “You really need to stop leaving you’re the door unlocked what if someone just waltzes in, its dangerous.” he scolds. “Also, I hope you don’t mind, I brought one of the freshman kids over” Seokjin says sheepishly, looking up to find Yoongi straddling his boyfriend. “Starting without me?” he questions with an arched brow, suggestively waggling his shoulders, laughing at the surprised choking noise he gets in response from the student beside him.  “I’m just joking” he says to the boy with an amused smile.

“Yoongi?” the boy says. Yoongi, just processing the sit