Its been awhile, for them to hold hands, have a comfortable silence, Jeonghan, himself don't know what happened to them, sure they never were a thing, do they have to call it a thing? he thought. both of them know they're both each other's without the official "i love you"s at least thats what Jeonghan thought, 
Seungcheol has been the only one who's been clingy to Jeonghan, every fan sign he would've been the one who initiate skin ship with the younger, its always been like that, at least thats what Seungcheol thought, 
Until Seungcheol feel like he's too much a fuss for the younger so he becomes less clingy and less seeing each other, they often fights rather than exchange smiles or sneaking for cuddles and hugs or kisses. 
••
Seungcheol is the type of person who wouldn't tell you once he's keeping a secret, not only secret, even with his health well being. Like right now, the other members standing up in front of a white room in a hospital, the white room door says "choi seungcheol". Jeonghan sighs, when will he start share the group's burden with the others, he thought. Its true that Cheol is the type of leader who will do anything for you including all the stress and even worrying others well being first rather than his, like recently, he's been worrying about Jihoon's state since he's been overworked himself for the new comback, and Soonyoung for every little choreography he stressed over before the tour until he, himself not realizing that he is too drained by everything, people might think he doesn't do much in the group, but the group wouldn't stand strong and unite as now if it weren't because of him. Jihoon wouldn't get sick if it weren't because of every night seungcheol would company him to make sure he eats and rests enough. Soonyoung wouldn't injure himself if it weren't because of seungcheol who advices him to always warm up before creating some new choreography. Now? Who would've known that the leader been sick over the past few weeks? Even the blonde as his roommate never realizes this. It makes him feel so guilty that the older would always notice every worry that is written on Jeonghan's face but himself? He didn't even realize the older has looked paler than usual. 
Jisoo approaches him, " The doctor said he's too tired and too stressed, his red blood cells just dropped, " he slump himself next to the blonde figure. Jeonghan just look blankly at the floor, " i told Soonyoung to go back with the others, manager hyung said he only let 1 of us to stay," Jisoo look at Jeonghan, but the later did not even budge he look tired thats what he can see, "You go home, I'll be here for cheol," Jisoo decides for them, Jeonghan quickly look at him in a quick speed, "No, I'll do it, the kids will need you more," Jisoo raised his brows, "its the kids or you want to be by Cheol side?" He grins, Jeonghan just snorts and grins back, "Go, I'll be fine, just bring me new clothes tomorrow," he pushes the later lightly, "Aight, Mr. Choi," he teases but quickly runaway from the red-as-lobster Jeonghan. 
After the manager hyung bid his goodbye he go in to the room, and all he see is Seungcheol laying there looking so pale as if all blood is drained from his body, he's eye bags look even darker, he looks skinnier, he's cheek bone look sunken, despite the new silver hair, he still look beautiful as ever to Jeonghan, he sits himself next to Seungcheol's bed. He pushes some of the hair that covers the older brows, he smile sadly, " stop making me worry, " He sighs, he took the older hand and rubs in circular motion, he smiles to himself, the older loves it when he does that, rubbing his hand to calm the older whenever he's tense or not feeling well, on the other side, Jeonghan loves it when Seungcheol rubs the back of his neck, it sends him chill and comfort through his whole body. 
Waiting him to wake up seem too long for Jeonghan as he fell asleep. 
Seungcheol wake up groggily and feel like all his body just got hit by a truck and his head is spinning but he feels weight on his left hand as he look down he sees a blonde figure laying there holding his hand, he smile to the sight as he about to sit himself up he feels like his head is too heavy to even sit down properly as he let out a pain groan, by the sound Jeonghan immediately wake up and snap his head up and sees the older has just woken up and he still look pale, he frowns, "you look pale," he said, Seungcheol smile softly, too softly, one thing that Jeonghan hates the most when he's sick is he's too soft and gentle, it makes his heart ache for the sight of too beautiful and gentleman cheol. "You're here," Seungcheol breathes out. "of course I'm here, what? You want Mingyu or Wonwoo instead here? Im more than happy to leave," he pouts and said in a bitter voice, Seungcheol tightens his grip on Jeonghan's hand but he didn't say a thing to reply the younger, "You're so cute," he chuckles. This kind of moment makes Seungcheol forget about his objective to be unaffectionate towards this certain younger since it feels like hell to kiss someone that good but never have the official label for what is he to the other, "Why didn't you tell me that you're sick?" Jeonghan frowns again but he sits himself down again still rubbing the back of Seungcheol's hand, "I didn't even realize I'm sick," he denies, he lied of course, he's been hiding his headache and stomachache from his uneven eating disorder. "I realized you rarely take your dinner, you always gave it to seungkwan or vernon if they're still hungry," he said disapprovingly, "stop cheolie, we need you to be healthy too, as much as you worry about the kids, the kids also worries about you, i think Seokmin about to cry when you collapsed," he chuckles to the memory of Seokmin eyes glassy with tears looking at the members trying to lift the leader up and jisoo calling for the manager to take the leader to the hospital. "Ah he's always been a cry baby," Seungcheol laughs softly, too softly, "which one hurts?" The younger asks, "when you're here nothing is hurt," he grins, Jeonghan slap his arm slightly, "Seriously cheol," he said this time, "my head hurts, my body hurts, basically it feels like i just got run by a train," he said with a smile on his face, "but i'll be alright," he said again since Jeonghan only looking at him. By that Jeonghan swears whatever happened between them, he doesn't care anymore, he loves this person, this Choi Seungcheol who always put anyone else's well being in front of his yet he still manages to put his best smile with the dimples that Jeonghan loves the most, can't hold the ache of loving someone this much, Jeonghan lift Seungcheol hand and kisses his palm tenderly, and breathes out the first official saying that's been Seungcheol waiting for, "I love you, cheol, gosh I really do," he kisses them once again with more love, "more than every human being should love his other half," he said. Seungcheol heart tumps, he feels alive, what is headache and stomachache when he has Jeonghan here, by his side? the kiss on the palm, it means so much more than every kisses they ever shared, its more than the kiss on the forehead to assures Jeonghan 'I'll be here for you' its more than the kiss on the neck to praises the other of how much they will always crave for each other's warmth, its more than the deep kiss on the lips to sealed whatever deal they have to only do this with themselves, it was the act of "My heart is in your hand, I trust all of my love in your hand," and for that Seungcheol smiles and stretches out his other hand and rubs Jeonghan's hair, "I love you too, Jeonghan-ah" he cracked the most beautiful crescent moon shape smile, "more than any men should love his other half," 

••

hi Im writing this on my phone, i was on the train reading a novel and all of a sudden this idea come up to me, so sorry for the mistakes grammar and typos. I'll try to fix it when I'm on my laptop. Since I'm still in Aussie that'll be a bit later aight! 

Thanks! Don't forget to drop some comments and vote for my stroy! 

xxEmmsxx