"It was a desperate attempt to estenguish the fire that burned too bright in their weak hearts."

Luhan stared at the telephone booth from the outside for a long time before finally making his mind up.

Sighing tiredly he entered the booth and slid the few coins in, dialling the number in with trembling frozen fingers.

He called six times but no one picked up on the other side.

As tears started to fall, Luhan called for one more time and to his surprise, this time the line didn't go on dead end. He finally heard the sound of soft breathing on the other side, inside.

“Sehun-ah…” Luhan whispered, clutching the phone to his ear and feeling hopelessly trapped in between the four walls of the tiny telephone booth.

“Luhan?”

Luhan shut his eyes closed as a soft feeling enveloped his heart hearing Sehun say his name.

“Sehun-ah…I just…I always…I always wanted to tell you something…” Luhan said, ignoring the tears that kept falling without his consent.

“Luhan?” Sehun repeated, sounding surprised and Luhan could hear both the annoyance and concern in his voice at the same time.

“I...I...I love you, Sehun-ah.”

Luhan finally let the words out and it felt like heavy stones were finally lifted from his heart, as more tears fell staining his rosy cheeks.

“I never got to say those words before, but I’ll say it now. I love you, Sehun-ah…I love you…I love you...” Luhan couldn’t keep the desperation in anymore so he sobbed clutching at the phone.

“Luhan…” Sehun started but the older didn't hear anything anymore as he let the phone slip from his shaking hands and he exited the telephone booth.

The cold air muffled Sehun’s voice who was still speaking in the telephone.

Luhan walked away under the cold starless night sky.

•

They always told him that time could heal the deepest of the wounds, but Sehun knew for a fact that it was just a pathetic lie. One of the many white lies made by people to deceive their own desperation and live in a life made of imagination and fake memories.

What Sehun wanted instead, was reality. He wanted to be with Luhan, not only in his fantasy, but in reality.

He wanted to hold hands with Luhan, to stare at his beautiful eyes for hours, to spend time with him, to make him laugh, to listen to his voice singing just for him…to be there for Luhan always.

To be with Luhan always.

Was that asking for too much?

Sehun really wanted for someone to tell him how one could heal a metaphorically wounded heart, because, if there was a way, he desperately needed to know.

He needed to know how to survive just a bit longer.

Just long enough to forget.

And then start again.

This time without Luhan.

***

Moving from Korea to China changed Sehun’s happy and outgoing personality into a cold and reserved one.

He didn’t like that he had to start life anew because that's what it basically was. It was starting again. To have a new home. Go to a new high school. Meeting new people. Making new friends...

This changed though straight on his first week at the new high school, and all thanks to a certain cute little boy called Luhan.

Sehun had just been sitting alone at the lunch table when the deer like boy had approached him with a wide smile. He couldn't deny the fact that the boy was exquisitely beautiful, nor he couldn't deny that his voice made his heart melt like honey.

Luhan was like a star for Sehun. A guiding light.

The only happiness in his dull life.

When Sehun had been at his worst, Luhan had magically appeared, and made everything easier, becoming his best friend.

And Sehun had fallen for him.

He had fallen for his best friend.

It was the best and worst of feelings all at once. Being able to stay close to Luhan as best friend didn’t help him at all because Sehun wanted more.

He wanted Luhan.

He wanted to be more than best friends with him.

•

Luhan always stuck with Sehun.

They spent their breaks and lunches at school together and, even in the afternoon after school, Luhan was always with Sehun.

And Sehun kept falling deeper.

He fell for Luhan's smile. The way his eyes twinkled when he was happy. The way that he touched Sehun so casually, without realizing that everytime his delicate fingers grazed the younger's skin, it sparkled fire.

But as time passed Sehun assumed that Luhan didn’t like him back in the same way that he did.

And that was clear when in the Christmas of their first year in high school, their friend Xiumin confessed to Luhan.

Luhan smiled and said yes.

It hurt Sehun.

It was the worst he had ever been hurt.

But he couldn’t blame it on Luhan.

That was the first of the many to come coldest winters in his life.

***

From that time, Sehun shut his emotions down and as painful as it was he managed to live with it.

Sehun made himself believe that his love for Luhan was not worth losing his friendship with him.

How could he break Luhan and Xiumin when they were so happy?

Sehun would still spend time with Luhan, but every time he did, he died a bit more because he longed for something that clearly was taken.

Still he was desperate…

Luhan started to spend more time with Xiumin and all Sehun could do was be jealous.

He couldn’t blame Luhan still.

It wasn’t his fault.

He was just being happy.

Sehun couldn’t blame him for being happy.

But he wanted them to be happy together.

Sehun didn’t hear Luhan’s laughter that often anymore. He didn’t get to see Luhan’s pretty eyes. He was not the one who made him laugh.

Sehun was not the one Luhan had chosen.

And then it just hit him that it really was too late.

So he moved on.

***

By the start of the second year Sehun’s life collapsed when he realized that he and Luhan spent time less and less.

It was as if